Post by The Hardcore Disciple on Jul 31, 2008 10:25:19 GMT -5
Finkel: The next contest is scheduled for one fall, with a 20 minute time limit.
*Music familiar to a casual fan plays as the Samoan Bulldozer makes his way to the ring, heaving himself in and stalking the ring, playing the savage islander gimmick to modern perfection.*
Finkel: Introducing first, from the Isle of Samoa, weighing in tonight at 350 pounds...UMAGA!
*The big man is regarded rather coldly by the fans, seemingly not impressed by his savage antics.*
Tom: The Samoan Bulldozer himself making his W*I*G debut against another new face tonight!
Jeannie: Eehhhh...sorry, big man, I don't do fatties.
Tom: JEANNIE!
Jeannie: What?!
*Before the banter can continue, bagpipes cut the air...and fold directly into "School's Out" by Alice Cooper as the resident Scotsman cuts the curtain, significantly more at ease than his opponent seems to be. He slaps a few high fives on his way to the ring and then swings one leg over the top rope, then the other. He sets up in the corner, barely paying his opponent mind. He removes and sets aside a neatly folded kilt, revealing his wrestling gear beneath it.*
Finkel: And his opponent, from Seattle, Washington...by way of Edinburgh, Scotland, and weighing in at 20 stone...CHAZ STONE!
Jeannie: Well hello there, tall, pale and Scottish.
Tom: He's certainly one of the biggest members of the W*I*G roster, but Umaga has 70 pounds on him! Is that going to have a factor in this match?
Jeannie: I wonder what he looks like under that kilt...
Tom: Will you be serious already?
Jeannie: Channel Gorilla Monsoon much?
Tom: Only when I need to.
*The bell rings, and the two take a moment to size each other up, readying for the task at hand. After some basic blows and chops to test the waters, they lock up in a collar and elbow hold, and both men show off incredible power by shoving each other like this for a lap of the ring. Umaga finally breaks the hold with a foot stomp that causes Chaz to relent, if only for a second.*
Tom: Impressive strength from both men, but Umaga had to resort to some foul play to break the hold.
Jeannie: Oh, poor Chaz! I'll be right back, I'm gonna go kiss it, make it better.
Tom: Stop right there, please.
*Umaga sends Chaz off with an Irish whip, then hits a shoulder block...that Chaz quickly jumps back up from, getting in Umaga's face and audibly telling him to "try dat crap again". Umaga now goes against the ropes, getting more momentum for another shoulder block. This connects too, but does not send the big Scot down. Umaga runs to the ropes for a third time, but as he comes back, Chaz greets him with a jumping clothesline, taking him down to the mat. Chaz immediately mounts an attack, grinding his elbow into the Samoan's face until the ref forces a four count, where Chaz relents.*
Jeannie: Looks like Chaz is not afraid to get a little dirty...I like that in a man...
Tom: Oh geez...
*Umaga rises, but is greeted with a clubbing blow to the neck by Chaz. Stunned by the shot, Chaz hurries to the ring ropes. Jumping somewhat clumsily to the top of them, he drops a big leg across the neck of the Samoan Bulldozer, and turns him over for the cover.*
Tom: 1...2...no!
Jeannie: It really looked like he had him that time...
*Chaz picks up his foe once more, but Umaga surprises him with a Manhattan drop. This is never a good surprise to recieve. The big Scot falls to his knees, clutching at his groin...until a stiff kick lands like thunder on his chest. A few stomps for good measure later, and Umaga now drags the big man over to the ring post, setting him up for his Samoan Cannonball.*
Tom: Umaga's setting up for the end here, Samoan Cannonball--wait a second!
Jeannie: Chaz rolled out of the ring just in time, yay!
Tom: Now it's Umaga with his back to the post, as the big man from Edinburgh slides back into the ring and quickly peels off a Yakuza kick in the corner against the big Samoan!
Jeannie: Looks like he hasn't let the size difference get to him so far.
*Umaga staggers out of the turnbuckle now and, instead of falling to the mat, is rushed there by a Russian leg sweep from his foe. Chaz sits down with a Boston crab, but Umaga grabs for a rope almost instantly. Chaz pulls the Samoan away from the ropes with pure power, but Umaga uses the adjustment to find some new leverage, and springs the Scot off of his legs in his own show of force. Umaga jumps up and levels Chaz with a brutal lariat...and bounces off the ropes again, going for a splash off the momentum. He connects, but the ref only gives him two. He's not pleased with this, and yells at the ref incoherently to show this.*
Tom: Umaga thinks he should've gotten the three count there.
Jeannie: Dream on--I counted it myself, there's no way that was three. Heck, it was barely two!
Tom: Subjective as such a thing is, this match continues regardless--but not for long, Umaga is signalling for the Samoan Spike!
*Indeed, Chaz is being held by his hair, ready to take Umaga's finisher. Umaga goes for the Spike, but Chaz drops down in time and powers him down with a snap spinebuster. Chaz picks his foe back up after a one count, locking in a front chancery and touring the ring and playing to the crowd. After holding the man for a little bit, he HEAVES the bigger man off his feet and holds him in the air in a stalling suplex position.*
Tom: Look at the power of this man Chaz Stone!
Jeannie: Hubba hubba. I might be in love, Tom.
Tom: Didn't you say that last time we saw, hell, a match?
Jeannie: I meant it this time.
Tom: Oy vey.
*Chaz, after playing to the crowd a little, decides to drop the big man--into the Emerald City Crash. The crowd pops for the powerful, ring-shaking maneuver, and Chaz goes for a cover. Two count, but not enough.*
Tom: Chaz signalling to the turnbuckle, he wants to end with a high-risk move!
*Chaz climbs the turnbuckle. When he reaches the top, he screams "ALBA GU BRATH! to the crowd, then waits for a dazed Umaga to get back up. As the big Samoan toddles to his feet, he spins around--right into a high-velocity flying spear from the policeman.*
Tom: What a move! That could be it, one-two-three!
Jeannie: Whooo! I like it when the pretty ones win!
Tom: chaz Stone impresses in his W*I*G debut, with a victory over Umaga, and the fans seem to have taken a liking to the big fella.
Jeannie: I know I have. I wouldn't mind him throwing me about as long as he wanted.
*The bell rings, and Chaz rises, a smile on his face. He comically saunters out of the ring, then bows for the cheering crowd once more before heading out through the curtain.*
*Music familiar to a casual fan plays as the Samoan Bulldozer makes his way to the ring, heaving himself in and stalking the ring, playing the savage islander gimmick to modern perfection.*
Finkel: Introducing first, from the Isle of Samoa, weighing in tonight at 350 pounds...UMAGA!
*The big man is regarded rather coldly by the fans, seemingly not impressed by his savage antics.*
Tom: The Samoan Bulldozer himself making his W*I*G debut against another new face tonight!
Jeannie: Eehhhh...sorry, big man, I don't do fatties.
Tom: JEANNIE!
Jeannie: What?!
*Before the banter can continue, bagpipes cut the air...and fold directly into "School's Out" by Alice Cooper as the resident Scotsman cuts the curtain, significantly more at ease than his opponent seems to be. He slaps a few high fives on his way to the ring and then swings one leg over the top rope, then the other. He sets up in the corner, barely paying his opponent mind. He removes and sets aside a neatly folded kilt, revealing his wrestling gear beneath it.*
Finkel: And his opponent, from Seattle, Washington...by way of Edinburgh, Scotland, and weighing in at 20 stone...CHAZ STONE!
Jeannie: Well hello there, tall, pale and Scottish.
Tom: He's certainly one of the biggest members of the W*I*G roster, but Umaga has 70 pounds on him! Is that going to have a factor in this match?
Jeannie: I wonder what he looks like under that kilt...
Tom: Will you be serious already?
Jeannie: Channel Gorilla Monsoon much?
Tom: Only when I need to.
*The bell rings, and the two take a moment to size each other up, readying for the task at hand. After some basic blows and chops to test the waters, they lock up in a collar and elbow hold, and both men show off incredible power by shoving each other like this for a lap of the ring. Umaga finally breaks the hold with a foot stomp that causes Chaz to relent, if only for a second.*
Tom: Impressive strength from both men, but Umaga had to resort to some foul play to break the hold.
Jeannie: Oh, poor Chaz! I'll be right back, I'm gonna go kiss it, make it better.
Tom: Stop right there, please.
*Umaga sends Chaz off with an Irish whip, then hits a shoulder block...that Chaz quickly jumps back up from, getting in Umaga's face and audibly telling him to "try dat crap again". Umaga now goes against the ropes, getting more momentum for another shoulder block. This connects too, but does not send the big Scot down. Umaga runs to the ropes for a third time, but as he comes back, Chaz greets him with a jumping clothesline, taking him down to the mat. Chaz immediately mounts an attack, grinding his elbow into the Samoan's face until the ref forces a four count, where Chaz relents.*
Jeannie: Looks like Chaz is not afraid to get a little dirty...I like that in a man...
Tom: Oh geez...
*Umaga rises, but is greeted with a clubbing blow to the neck by Chaz. Stunned by the shot, Chaz hurries to the ring ropes. Jumping somewhat clumsily to the top of them, he drops a big leg across the neck of the Samoan Bulldozer, and turns him over for the cover.*
Tom: 1...2...no!
Jeannie: It really looked like he had him that time...
*Chaz picks up his foe once more, but Umaga surprises him with a Manhattan drop. This is never a good surprise to recieve. The big Scot falls to his knees, clutching at his groin...until a stiff kick lands like thunder on his chest. A few stomps for good measure later, and Umaga now drags the big man over to the ring post, setting him up for his Samoan Cannonball.*
Tom: Umaga's setting up for the end here, Samoan Cannonball--wait a second!
Jeannie: Chaz rolled out of the ring just in time, yay!
Tom: Now it's Umaga with his back to the post, as the big man from Edinburgh slides back into the ring and quickly peels off a Yakuza kick in the corner against the big Samoan!
Jeannie: Looks like he hasn't let the size difference get to him so far.
*Umaga staggers out of the turnbuckle now and, instead of falling to the mat, is rushed there by a Russian leg sweep from his foe. Chaz sits down with a Boston crab, but Umaga grabs for a rope almost instantly. Chaz pulls the Samoan away from the ropes with pure power, but Umaga uses the adjustment to find some new leverage, and springs the Scot off of his legs in his own show of force. Umaga jumps up and levels Chaz with a brutal lariat...and bounces off the ropes again, going for a splash off the momentum. He connects, but the ref only gives him two. He's not pleased with this, and yells at the ref incoherently to show this.*
Tom: Umaga thinks he should've gotten the three count there.
Jeannie: Dream on--I counted it myself, there's no way that was three. Heck, it was barely two!
Tom: Subjective as such a thing is, this match continues regardless--but not for long, Umaga is signalling for the Samoan Spike!
*Indeed, Chaz is being held by his hair, ready to take Umaga's finisher. Umaga goes for the Spike, but Chaz drops down in time and powers him down with a snap spinebuster. Chaz picks his foe back up after a one count, locking in a front chancery and touring the ring and playing to the crowd. After holding the man for a little bit, he HEAVES the bigger man off his feet and holds him in the air in a stalling suplex position.*
Tom: Look at the power of this man Chaz Stone!
Jeannie: Hubba hubba. I might be in love, Tom.
Tom: Didn't you say that last time we saw, hell, a match?
Jeannie: I meant it this time.
Tom: Oy vey.
*Chaz, after playing to the crowd a little, decides to drop the big man--into the Emerald City Crash. The crowd pops for the powerful, ring-shaking maneuver, and Chaz goes for a cover. Two count, but not enough.*
Tom: Chaz signalling to the turnbuckle, he wants to end with a high-risk move!
*Chaz climbs the turnbuckle. When he reaches the top, he screams "ALBA GU BRATH! to the crowd, then waits for a dazed Umaga to get back up. As the big Samoan toddles to his feet, he spins around--right into a high-velocity flying spear from the policeman.*
Tom: What a move! That could be it, one-two-three!
Jeannie: Whooo! I like it when the pretty ones win!
Tom: chaz Stone impresses in his W*I*G debut, with a victory over Umaga, and the fans seem to have taken a liking to the big fella.
Jeannie: I know I have. I wouldn't mind him throwing me about as long as he wanted.
*The bell rings, and Chaz rises, a smile on his face. He comically saunters out of the ring, then bows for the cheering crowd once more before heading out through the curtain.*