Fannie Package
Local Talent
W*I*G* Women's Champion
Bigger is Better!
Posts: 21
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Post by Fannie Package on Dec 24, 2008 13:17:45 GMT -5
INTERIOR- A GYM NEAR THE W*I*G-SPHERE
*A close-up of a huge bicep being flexed & unflexed slowly pulls back to reveal Fannie Package doing a few barbell curls. Fannie is approached by another mass of muscle. A thick Scottish accent addresses her.*
Voice: Hey! Here, lass. I been tol' you're mah partner for tha Colvin Cup.
*Fannie looks up from her workout. She stands & turns around. The camera pulls back a little further to reveal Chaz Stone standing with Lana by his side. Lana is nearly cowering in fear at the sight of the huge Fannie Package. Chaz extends a hand towards Fannie.*
Chaz: Chaz Stone, pleased t'meet ya so a'am.
*Fannie accepts the handshake & smiles back at him. From looking at their faces, it is evident that each is trying their best to squeeze the other's hand as tightly as possible to test their grip, neither gets a clear advantage & they disengage from the handshake. Fannie's voice is much deeper than even Chaz's thick Scottish brogue.*
Fannie: Fannie Package. I've seen what you do out there, Mr. Stone...
Chaz: Ach, just Chaz is fine.
Fannie: Sorry, Chaz. You're one of the few I could look at & see a decent opponent in, but I get the impression we'll be much better served as friends than as foes.
Chaz: Aye. And Ah've sin the way yoo've been shafted oot o' yer shots at the W*I*G Weemen's Championship, just like Ah've been shafted oot o' my shots at the W*I*G Worl' Hea'yweight Championship. Fannie, Yoo 'n' I ha' bo' go' alot te prove by ent'rin', an' more impor'an'ly winnin', this tournament. You more'n deserve ano'her chance to ge' Rosie...
Fannie: And you totally deserve to get another shot at Coltrane.
Chaz: Exac'ly. P'raps more'n any of tha other teams in this, we knoo wha' s'like ta be jus' tha' close ta winnin' the gold. An' between tha size a' you 'n' me, Ah don' think anyone'll be causin' us too many problems, d'yoo?
*Fannie unties her hair & shakes it loose before smoothing it back & tying it back up again. She shoots another knowing smile at Chaz.*
Fannie: I think it's fair to say we've both proven ourselves, but more than anything I think we need to show that we're not just a pair of schlubs. We got shots at those respective titles before until certain people got involved &, as you put it, shafted us out of our shots. Now we have the opportunity to prove that we were deserving of those shots.
*The pair shake hands again. Fannie drapes a white towel over her shoulders as she goes to walk away.*
Fannie: I'll see you in the ring. Good luck, Chaz.
*Exit Fannie.*
Chaz: Aye, good luck to you 'n' all.
Lana: Why do you have to team with her? She scares me?
Chaz: Ach, give it a rest. She's a'ight. B'sides, yer nay ready ta enter da ring jus yet, an' dis bein' an innergender tourney, ah need a par'ner o' the finer sex ta work wit'.
Lana: "Fina genda?" She's 'bout as big as y'are! Ah'm not convinced she's a she after all!
Chaz: Ye've any evidence ta back dat claim?
Lana: Where shall ah start da list?
*The couple continue to discuss Fannie's indeterminate gender as we fade out.*
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Post by Team Raft Shack on Dec 24, 2008 15:31:18 GMT -5
Following our return to the scene of the WIGSphere, the Colvintron once again lights up before the crowd, who quickly cast their gaze towards it once more, curious to see what awaits them. They don't wait long, as a rather distorted song begins playing in the background, completely garbled and nearly impossible to tell what it is. The rainbow of colors appear on the screen once again... as a new set of text begins to form across the monitor.
Did you solve the quiz?
If so, good for you!
If not... try again in round two!
After giving people enough time to read it, this text quickly vanishes, as another cryptic message begins to form across the Colvintron.
Keened Moon Wort
Dad Deaf Ninny
Bonnet Hours
Cleanlier Mops
Inch Coo Sell Lo
Twas Once Sec
After enough time for people to write down these messages is given, the Colvintron quickly and abruptly shuts off, the screen returning to it's former blackness once again. The audience simply begins to discuss amongst one another what all this could possibly mean, as we quickly cut to a following segment.
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Jack Jupiter
Local Talent
I'm the REAL Jack Jupiter!
Posts: 10
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Post by Jack Jupiter on Dec 28, 2008 19:17:05 GMT -5
*The camera fades into an anonymous coffeehouse, a crowd of people busy getting their drinks and conversing. As it pans over to an isolated table, a figure is sitting there, holding onto a newspaper and reading it, everything but their barely-closed hands holding onto the material. The camera zooms in.*
Annoying voice: Not him, you moron! The next table over!
*Quickly the camera pans over to another table, a skinny blonde man in casual clothing sitting at a nearby table with his hands clenched under his chin, his elbows on the table and a glazed look in his eyes.*
Man: God, just what am I paying you for--*quickly he notices the camera being focused on him, and flashes a grin most befitting of the Kerwin White titantron.* Hello there America and other countries that I could purchase…allow me to introduce myself. I’m the REAL Jack Jupiter! And this isn’t some hideous, mind-bending nightmare! It’s…reality!
*He cracks his knuckles and his voice perks up even more.*
Jack: So you’re probably just dying to know…why is Jack Jupiter—the last remaining Olympian and all-around stud doing here, with regular people—gracing you with his presence? Why, to let you know that I’m officially back to the big leagues! Ready to rock and rumble and demolish the devastation of the………………devastators. And where else than in Wrestling’s Innovative Genesis, home and oasis to a wide array of women for me to slaughter and men for me to conquer……or was that the other way around? Nah, if it was, then someone would have alerted me to such an embarrassing error. Alas, I am hardly alone. Oho no. See, I brought myself a friend this time around. A friend who doesn’t interfere with nature’s way of making the REAL Jack Jupiter’s will be done:
*Into frame walks in a woman. A long, huge braid of dirty blonde hair hangs over her shoulder and rests at her hip. A brief nudge of her neck and the braid falls back into place behind her. A leather gloved hand brushes off a buttoned up white shirt's shoulder. Her skin is a light but noticable olive tone. Her face looks completely bored if not emotionally nondescript. The woman takes a glance at her opposite wrist, checking her watch. The watch's face reflects off of the black sun glasses the woman wears. Slowly, she lowers her hand and stands beside Jupiter.*
Jack: She's stupendous...she's spectacular...she's superior! I'd even go so far as to say she's...mediocre! Okay, not really. The first three are right though, I swear on -this- Bible.
Manager: *from offscreen* Hey, put down my Banzai tree!
Jack: Sorry, sorry about that Mr. Henderson! *puts tree down* Erm anyway, allow me to introduce this employee of mine. Her name is Dreia Borbone, possibly descended from one of the Bourbon rulers of Italy...or maybe one of their relatives. But anyway, that's where I found her. I scoured the ENTIRE globe looking for the perfect person to help me in my quest...and after a rigorous screening test to see who could KO people the fastest, I was convinced and physically intimidated enough to hire her. She works for me for a living now...but I swear, only for protection. I thought about the "other" thing but was quickly given enough reason as to not try that. Why don't you say hello to the nice little monkeys watching at home, Dreia?
Dreia: *She dully stares into the camera.* ...
Jack: She's really not much of a speaker. But like I said, she never lets things go awry. Which I guess makes us kinda a yin-yang thing, eh Dreia? *he elbow nudges her* EH? *he elbow nudges her, harder* EEEHHH?!
Dreia: *in a heavy accent* ...Italian.
Jack: I just love that sweet sound...erm anyway, I think now would be the proper time for a demonstration...
*Jack scans the building, the camera following where his eyes are looking. He spies a couple sitting at a table not far away, and sets off.*
Jack: *to the woman* Hey baby, I'm sure you can get something that can keep you up all night and you can get something that tastes downright great. Well come with me, we'll blow this joint and I'll show you just how you can get both!
*The woman sneers at him and the man nearby gets out of his seat, his fists clenched*
Man: What the hell, you jackass?! Get the hell away from my girlfriend...if you say something like that again I'm going to hit you in the skull so hard that it's going to fall down your throat and come outta your ass.
Jack: Oh really? Are we so sure about that? Well...perhaps you should speak to my associate!
*Jack turns around but his bodyguard isn't nearby.*
Jack: Uh... *he snaps his fingers very quickly and loudly*
*Instantly Dreia stands infront of Jack just in time to catch a punch thrown by the outraged man. She wretches his arm and pulls it behind him as she wraps her arm around his neck. She listlessly pauses to look at Jack.*
Jack: Dreia...please dispose of this ruffian.
*She loosens her grip around the man's neck and slams his head straight into the table.*
*The man flops back and hits the floor, as his girlfriend looks on in horror.*
Jack: Now just where were we, baby?
*She just stares on, but is cut off by another snap from Jack Jupiter's fingers.*
Jack: Dreia...let's not let anyone try and pry this woman from what she really wants...she'll learn, but unfortunately she doesn't know it yet. They never do, but they figure it out sooner or later...
Dreia: *sarcastically* ...poet.
Jack: And she admires my talents like any true "Realist" would. I mean...how many people would do THAT?!
*quickly Jack pulls a small bag with a dollar sign written on it and hands it to Dreia, which she nondescriptly deposits in a pocket.*
Jack: But I'm mincing words...Dreia, let's escort this fair lady with me so I can give her the evening of a lifetime...and after that? Well, we'll just have to plan our game for the day that the ALMIGHTY and ALL-SMART JACK JUPITER knows...stuff...about! And he comes to the...W*I*G...and...does...things...!
...
Jack: Let's just go.
*Jack Jupiter turns to the camera and lets off yet another cheesy grin.*
Jack: So to all you folks out there in Radio Land...this is the REAL Jack Jupiter...under and in.
*The camera fades to black.*
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Post by Duncan Dunn: Super Agent on Dec 28, 2008 21:47:28 GMT -5
*We're back at the W*I*GSphere, where W*I*G Interviewer John Cena stands in the ring, microphone in hand.
Cena: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the W*I*G arena, a very special guest, Duncan Dunn: Sports Agent!
*'Time' by Pink Floyd plays throughout the arena, as a young, Caucasian man wearing a suit makes his way to ringside. He is good looking and has spikey, brown hair. He is on his cell phone. He gets into the ring and hangs up his cell phone and grabs a microphone.
Cena: Hello, Duncan. You have requested this time to talk about what you do, and your future here in W*I*G.
Dunn: Ha ha, yes. And I don't need you out here slowing me down, so hit the bricks, junior.
*Cena, looking offended and dejected, leaves the ring and goes to the back.
Dunn: Now that we have the dead weight gone, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Duncan Dunn, and I am a sports agent. Not just any sports agent, but a SUPER agent. I am constantly wheeling and dealing with the elite. Rubbing elbows with the rich and famous, and now, I will apply my talents to Pro Wrestling W*I*G. I'm willing to wager...No, guarantee that anyone who signs on with my company and heeds my specific advice will only see great things in their future. Money, Privilege, Women, and most of all Gold! Oh, and before I forget, allow me to introduce my first client here in W*I*G. Making his....return to Pro Wrestling W*I*G....Sky Monix!
*'Superstar' by Lupe Fiasco plays, and Sky Monix walks out to the ring, but he has gone through a slight physical transformation. He now has a closely shaved head and a light beard. He is wearing a tan polo shirt, jeans, and a brown leather jacket. He is also wearing "Kanye" glasses. He gets into the ring and shakes hands with Duncan. The two leave together as "Money by Pink Floyd plays.
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Post by C. M. Synthy on Dec 29, 2008 18:52:22 GMT -5
The camera pans back to the arena, showing the ring announcer in all his microphone'd glory.
Announcer: Introducing first, weighing in at 115 pounds and standing in at Five feet and three inches, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada....Taylooorrr...WILDE!
Dale Oliver's "Poison" leaks through the PA system as Taylor Wilde walks to the top of the ramp and does her signature salute to the much-uncaring crowd. The fans seem to be waiting to see whom her opponent before judging on a reaction for Miss Wilde.Taylor swings her way to to the ring and stretches a bit before turning her eyes to the entrance.
Tom: TNA's 'Upset Queen' seems unsure as to who exactly her opponent is. This could hinder her chances at a win..or maybe not.
Jeannie: Hinder? Where?! An 'experienced' band like that could probably show me a thing or two...
Tom: *The crowd can hear his facepalm as the lights begin dimming.*
*And she's a killer She's a keeper
Am I blurry In your vision? Was I just A poor decision? Cut me open With precision And we'll finger The incision.... Tell me, what have I done? Quid pro quo
To watch you lose..... CONTROL?*
The crowd loses it completely. Synthy Eris steps out, jauntily adjusting her signature sunglasses as she pops her neck. She rolls her shoulders and makes her way down the ramp, pausing to smirk and slap a few hands.
Jeannie: Oh my god. Does this mean Tristan's back?!
Tom: Probably. But the look on Taylor's face and the crowd's reaction says it all. Synthy Eris has returned and-
Jeannie: Tristan's luscious body'll be back! God, that man's mohawk alone is enough to make me -
Synthy flips over the top rope and tosses her sunglasses nonchalantly over her shoulder. The bell rings. The two lock up - and Taylor gets a nasty kick to her gut followed by a perfectly-executed DDT. Synthy stands and ruffles her hair, rolling her wrists, waiting for Taylor to stand. Synthy goes for a clothesline, only for Wilde to dodge and hit a quick German suplex. Wilde goes for a cartwheel elbow drop, only for Miss Eris to roll out of the way. Taylor stands and looks to hit a Lou Thesz press, only for Synthy to monkey flip out of the move.
Tom: Not a touch of ring-rust for Synthy, it would seem!
Jeannie: I'll happily wrestle with her brother to help with his...naked.
Tom: Aren't you like the one woman that man hasn't taken out?
Jeannie: He's saving the best for last.
Tom: Oh, I'm sure... Nice Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker from Synthy!
Focusing back on more important matters then Jeannie's lack of love from Tristan, Synthy's taken a nice control of the match. Wilde attempts to gain some ground, using the ropes for some leverage, but Synthy sees her and lands an enziguiri kick. Eris grins and has yet to break even a sweat. She gets a bit arrogant, going to the opposing turnbuckle and playing the crowd a little bit- only for Wilde to bounce up and display an impressive springboard armdrag. Taylor goes for a pin.
1
..2
Synthy's arm springs up.She's not one to be taken out that easily.
Jeannie: I, however, like to be taken out easily.
Tom: Please tell me you didn't just break the fourth wall.
Jeannie: What wall? I was just saying I was easy.
Tom: What!? Naw.
Synthy elbows Taylor in the face and shoves her down to her ass. She crouches on one knee, and delivers a sharp Shining Wizard to Taylor. Picking her up, Synthy follows up with a Angelus Noxnoctis (Angel Nightmare).
Tom: Wicked Kudome Valentine from Synthy!
Synthy could go for the win here, but she's not exactly one to turn down a path of lesser destruction. Grinning manically, she lifts up Taylor Wilde and drops her with her signature Synful Intentions. Wilde is knocked out, no upset win for her tonight.
1
2
3
Synthy stands an gestures for a mike.
Tom: Maybe we'll get an explanation for the Olymnpus Siblings' disappearance over the last few months?
Jeannie: Talk about Tristan! maybe he'll come out and join you! Please?
Synthy looks around for a moment, as if debating what exactly she wants to say. She licks her lips and inhales slowly.
Synthy: Ladies and gentlemen, I'm not going to apologize for the millionth and one disappearing act. I'm not going to say what's been going on, and I'm not going to make you pity me for the madness that keeps me away from what I love best. I will say I'm ready to stay in this ring, ready to fight my way back to where I rightfully should be. Starting from the bottom again.... I'm pleased. Because now? Now I can prove that I belong to that Woman's Title, and it belongs to me, without people proclaiming I'm only getting a chance at it because of my past accomplishments with a certain other company. I'm going to rise to my rightful place because I belong there. I'm renewed, reborn, and better then bitchin'. To the ladies in the back, and whatever the hell Fannie Package actually is, to that rodent Danny Taylor, I'm ready for you. The real question is... are you ready to attempt blocking my way to the top? Lovelies... I'd like to see you try.
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The White Boys
Opener
First Ever WIG Tag Team Champions
Rammer Jammer, Yellowhammer, give 'em hell, Alabama!
Posts: 36
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Post by The White Boys on Dec 29, 2008 20:18:24 GMT -5
Howard Finkel: The following match is scheduled for one fall and is a Champions VS Champions Match. *Beer Money, Inc.’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfB1g_7tfy8 Finkel: Introducing first, coming down the aisle, being escorted by the Pride of Tennessee, Miss Jackie, at a combined weight of 495 pounds—the TNA World Tag Team Champions, BEER MONEY, INC. *Beer Money and Miss Jackie come out to the boos of the crowd. Robert Roode has on a yellow robe, yellow wrestling trunks, black wrist tape, black knee pads, white boots, and one of the TNA World Tag Team belts around his waist. James Storm has on a black cowboy hat, black leather duster jacket, yellow wrestling trunks, black and yellow elbow pads, black knee pads, black boots, and the other TNA World Tag Team belt around his waist. Miss Jackie has on a yellow cowboy hat, a yellow top, black pants, and black cowboy boots. They all walk to the ring and enter it. Roode takes off his belt and robe. Storm takes off his hat, jacket, and belt. And, they both hand them to Miss Jackie, who then exits the ring.* Tom Bailey: Welcome back to W*I*G Vindication. And, we are ready for one of our three Champion VS Champion matches, this one being the TNA World Tag Team Champions, Beer Money, Inc., versus the W*I*G Tag Team Champions, the White Boys. Jeannie Lawless: It’s about time the White Boys showed up! They’ve been gone for two freakin’ months! I need my White Boys fix, dammit! Tom: Hey! Take it up with them. *The White Boys’ music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHsDa9_HSlAFinkel: And their opponents, at a combined weight of 450 pounds, from Mobile, Alabama—The W*I*G Tag Team Champions, THE WHITE BOYS. *The White Boys come out to the boos of the crowd. They are both wearing red tights with a big blue X on the front and back with white stars on the blue X and white lines separating the blue and red and black boots. They have the W*I*G Tag Team Title belts around their waists. Justin is holding that Confederate guitar of his. They walk to the ring and enter it. Then, some pyro in the design of the Confederate Flag goes off. The White Boys then take off their belts and hand them to the ref, who hands them to the timekeeper on the outside.* Jeannie: OH MY GOD!!!! LOOK AT THEM! THEY’VE GOT TANS!!!! Tom: I’m guessing they went on vacation. Jeannie: Those bastards!!!! They could have taken me with them! *The bell rings. Jason and Storm move onto the apron. Justin and Roode circle each other and then tie up. There’s a small tug-o-war, but Justin gets the upper hand and locks Roode into an armbar. After a few minutes, Roode falls to one knee. Suddenly, he sweeps Justin’s legs, knocking him to the mat and causing him to let go of the hold. Roode jumps up and goes for an elbow drop, but Justin rolls out of the way. Both men get up and stare at each other. They circle each other and tie up again. This time, Roode gets the upper hand and locks Justin into a hammerlock. Justin tries to escape by grabbing Roode’s hair and arm, but it doesn’t work. After a few minutes, Justin grabs the back of Roode’s head with his free arm and starts walking around the ring. Then, he picks up speed. Eventually, he is running around the ring with Roode. Suddenly, Justin ducks down near the ropes and sends Roode through the ropes and to the outside, causing him to let go of the hammerlock. Suddenly, Justin to the opposite side of the ring, bounces off the ropes, runs across the ring, jumps onto the top rope, and lands onto Roode with a shooting star plancha.* Tom: Rammer jammer, yellow hammer. Give 'em hell, Alabama! Justin White showing no signs of ring rust with a shooting star plancha onto Robert Roode on the outside! Jeannie: Where in the hell did you learn “Rammer jammer”? Tom: What!? I like to do some research on the wrestlers. *Justin gets up. Suddenly, Storm runs across the apron, climbs up the corner, jumps off, and hits Justin with a double axe handle. Storm gets up. Then, Jason runs across the apron, jumps off, and lands on Storm with a Lou Thesz press followed by some punches. Roode gets up, grabs Jason, and throws him into the ring. Suddenly, Justin hits Roode in the back with a back elbow strike. He throws Roode into the ring, and Jason stomps on him while Justin climbs up onto the apron. Jason picks up Roode for a dominator, and Justin jumps onto the top rope and hits Roode’s neck with an elbow drop.* Tom: The White Boys show that they are still great at double teaming with The Flying Elephant. Jeannie: I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again—those White Boys can double team me any time. Tom: I wish you wouldn’t say it again. Jeannie: Well, if wishes were horses, one of us could ride off and never hear me say that again. *The White Boys pick up Roode. Suddenly, Storm enters the ring and spears Jason. The two men fight, and the referee pulls them apart and tells them to return to their corners. They reluctantly do so. Meanwhile, Justin knocks Roode into the neutral corner with some knife-edge chops. Then, he whips Roode across the ring. Justin follows. Roode hits the corner very hard and bounces off the corner. Suddenly, Justin hits him from behind with a leg lariat to the back of Roode’s head. Justin then rolls Roode over and goes for a pin.* Ref: 1…2…*Storm enters the ring and breaks up the count.* Tom: Justin White nearly gets the three count, but Storm saves his partner. Jeannie: I guess Justin is sorry about his damn luck! Tom: Oh God! That was really bad. Jeannie: At least, I try. Tom: How about you try to succeed instead of fail. *The referee makes Storm leave the ring as Justin grabs Roode, throws him into the White Boys’ corner, and tags in Jason. Justin picks up Roode as Jason climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Then, they hit Roode with a cut-throat inverted Death Valley driver/diving leg drop combo. Justin exits the ring as Jason covers Roode.* Ref: 1…2…*Miss Jackie grabs Roode’s leg and puts it on the bottom rope. The ref only sees Roode’s foot on the rope and breaks up the count.* Tom: Southern Hospitality almost gets the win for the White Boys, but Miss Jackie’s interference has put the kibosh on that. Jeannie: That wasn’t very hospitable. Tom: What: the White Boys’ move or Miss Jackie’s interference. Jeannie: Um…both. *Jason stomps on Roode a few times. Then, he climbs to the second turnbuckle, jumps off, and lands on Roode with an axe handle elbow drop. He gets up and moves Roode a little from the ropes. Then, Jason runs to the ropes, bounces off them, and hits Roode with a pointed elbow drop. Jason gets up, grabs Roode’s legs, and stomps on his midsection several times. Then, he goes for a catapult, but Roode surprises him with a roll-up pin.* Ref: 1…2…*Jason kicks out.* *Both men get up. Suddenly, Roode hits Jason with a drop toe hold; and Jason lands throat first onto the second rope. Then, Roode distracts the referee, allowing Miss Jackie to punch Jason a few times. Justin stops her and exchanges some harsh words with her. Roode gets up and hits Jason with a few sentons. Then, he pulls Jason from the ropes and hits him with a spinebuster. Then, he picks up Jason and hits him with a hangman’s neckbreaker.* Tom: Looks like Beer Money, Inc., has taken control of this match as Robert Roode hits Jason with the Roode Awakening. Jeannie: Come on, Jason! You’re not gonna let a Canadian and someone from Tennessee beat you!? *Roode picks up Jason and whips him into Beer Money’s corner. Then, he tags in Storm. Storm enters the ring; and both men stomp on Jason for a few seconds. Then, they pull him from the corner and hit him with a double suplex. Roode exits the ring as Storm waits for Jason to get up. Jason does, and Storm hits him with a running high knee strike. The move knocks Jason back into the ropes, and he bounces off them. Storm gets up and hits Jason with a superkick as he bounces off them. Then, Storm goes for a pin.* Ref: 1…2…*Jason kicks out.* Tom: Storm hits Jason with the Last Call, but it wasn’t the last call for Jason as he kicks out. Jeannie: And, you say that my jokes are bad. Tom: Well, I didn’t say that mine were the best in the world. Jeannie: It was implied!!!! *Both men get up. Suddenly, Jason unleashes a flurry of chops and European uppercuts onto Storm, backing him up into a corner. Then, Jason backs off, walks to the other corner, charges at Storm, and goes for a big boot. However, Storm ducks, and Jason just hits the corner. Storm gets up and sweeps Jason’s other leg, causing his other leg to get hung up on the ropes. Storm gets up and attacks Jason’s leg. The ref tries to pull Storm off, but he can’t. So, he does a 5 count.* Ref: 1…2…3…4…*Storm backs off. Jason gets unhooked and falls to the mat.* Jeannie: OH NO! Tom: It looks like Jason’s knee may be injured. *Storm grabs Jason by his legs and pulls him to the center of the ring. Then, he kicks the back of Jason’s knee several times and then locks Jason into a sharpshooter. Roode and Miss Jackie applaud Storm while Justin cheers on his brother. Storm has the move locked on for a few minutes. The ref keeps asking Jason if he wants to give up, but Jason says, “No.” Then, Jason pushes up off the mat and starts crawling to the ropes. Storm tries to pull Jason back to the center of the ring, but Jason proves to be stronger. Slowly but surely, Jason reaches the ropes and grabs the second one with his left hand. Then, he grabs the rope with other hand and throws Storm off.* Tom: Holy Dixie! Jason White pulls himself and Storm to the ropes and then throws Storm off of his legs. Jeannie: Oh my! What leg strength! It must give him great thrusting ability. Tom: You’re not even trying to make double entendres now, are you? Jeannie: I couldn’t think of a good one! *Jason tries to tag in Justin, but Storm cuts him off. He pulls Jason to the center of the ring. However, Jason hits Justin with a European uppercut followed by a neckbreaker.* Tom: Alabama Uppercut Number 1 to James Storm. Jeannie: Maybe Number 2 will follow. *Jason picks up Storm. However, Storm knees Jason in the stomach. Then, he backs up into the ropes and charges at Jason; but Jason catches Storm with a flapjack lift into a European uppercut.* Jeannie: I knew it! Tom: Alabama Uppercut Number 2 to James Storm. Maybe a tag will follow. *Jason goes to tag in Justin, but Roode enters the ring and cuts him off. Roode picks him up for a powerbomb, but Jason counters with a hurricanrana. Both men get up. Roode charges at Jason, but Jason catches him and hits him with a throat first flapjack onto the top rope.* Tom: Jason counters Roode’s powerbomb and then hits him with the 2nd Amendment. Jeannie: He’s on a roll, but he needs a tag. *Jason then tags in Justin. Justin enters the ring and hits James Storm with a leg lariat. Then, he and Roode get up; and Justin hits Roode with a dropkick. He and Storm get up, and Justin and hits Storm with a Stone Cold Stunner as Storm charges him. Then, Justin and Roode get up; and he hits Roode with a superkick. Storm gets up, and Justin kicks him in the stomach and hits him with a Saito suplex.* Tom: Auburn Sucks to James Storm. Justin White is on a roll! Jeannie: And, the name of that move is appropriate to Auburn’s season this year. *Justin and Roode get up. Justin kicks Roode in the stomach and hits him with a leg hook brainbuster.* Tom: The Birmingham Buster to Robert Roode! This looks like the White Boys might have this match in the bag! Jeannie: And, I would like to get a hold of that bag. Tom: Jesus Christ, Jeannie! Jeannie: Oh, don’t act all shocked! *Justin gets up. Then, he picks up Roode and hits him with a swinging reverse DDT.* Tom: Around Montgomery to Robert Roode. Jeannie: Now, he’s just toying with Beer Money. *Jason reenters the ring while Justin picks up Roode. Then, Justin hits Roode with a crucifix powerbomb into a neckbreaker from Jason.* Tom: Mississippi Burning to Storm. I guess the White Boys want to make sure Beer Money is out before they pin them. Jeannie: That would make sense. *Jason and Justin pick up Roode and throw him out of the ring. Then, Jason goes over to Storm and picks him up while Justin moves onto the apron. Justin then jumps onto the top rope, and they hit Storm with a spinebuster/springboard spinning heel kick combo.* Tom: And, the White Boys sent James Storm Down The Alabama River. Jeannie: Are you going to say that every time they do that move? Tom: Yes. *The White Boys get up. Jason picks up Storm in a holding suplex. Justin jumps up onto Storm. And, they hit Storm with a front suplex/modified double knee chestbreaker. Justin then covers Storm.* Ref: 1…2…3. *The bell rings, and the White Boys’ music plays.* Finkel: Here are your winners—the W*I*G Tag Team Champions, THE WHITE BOYS. *Jason and Justin celebrate their victory as the ref hands them their W*I*G Tag Team Title belts. Roode and Miss Jackie grab the TNA World Tag Team Title belts, get Storm, and leave the ringside area. As Beer Money, Inc. exits, Jason grabs the microphone from Finkel.* Tom: It looks like the White Boys are going to speak. Jeannie: Maybe we’ll get some answers. If not, then we’ll at least get to hear their sexy voices. Jason: As y’all may or may not know, me and mah brotha have not been in W*I*G fer a while. Ya see, we won the W*I*G Tag Team Titles in the Ultimate Endurance match. We had to go through three teams to win these titles! One of those matches was a hardcore match, and the otha was a steel cage match! Then, we were given the opportunity to choose our opponents fer Halloween Hell, and we chose NOT to wrestle. At least that was the plan! We were goaded into rasslin’ those two ladies Koshinryo and Shuga, whom we beat. So, after winnin’ these titles in a gruelin’ match and successfully defendin’ them, we decided to take a vacation. Justin: *grabs the mic* To sweet home ALABAMA!!!! WOO!!!! *The crowd boos.* Jason: We needed it, dammit! It is hard to be da White Boys, bein’ so good, so tough, and so handsome. We needed a break. And, it was a good vacation, except for Alabama losin’ to Florida in the SEC Title Game. Justin: *grabs the mic* *BEEP*in’ Gators! Jason: Calm down! At least they’re in the Sugar Bowl. Justin: Yeah, but it’s not the same. Jason: Well, anyway… *“Sugar Cube” by Porcelain and the Tramps cuts off Jason before he can go no further. Parasols hold out in front of them, they swirl around each other, then raise the parasols up and hold hands as they walk down the aisle. The two living dolls stop at the aisle. Koshinryo pauses, holding her hand out to the stage hand as Shuga places her hand next to Koshinryo's. They are handed one mic, which they both wrap their hands around and raise to between their faces.* Koshinryo: A vacation, Chaos, they proclaim as they hid.Shuga: Though ravage the White Boys the Light wished they did.Koshinryo: The Darkness still remains forever, always.Shuga: Forget not the Light, lest the Powers split ways.Koshinryo: Time... Chaos tells us we have little.Shuga: We are not those to waste what we know to be limited...Koshinryo: Only gold can steal us time...Shuga: Though Gold we know, is for our prime…Koshinryo: He, She, They will grants us moreShuga: Though we must admit, the chance for pleasurable pain has quite a lure...Koshinryo: One more chance to rise. No more to fall.Shuga: The angels and demons are making us heed their call...Koshinryo: Disappointment means a return to our deity.Shuga: Our Deity? The man, woman, the Higher then human....wants their dolls back.Koshinryo: Try as mortals might, we all return to the toybox.Shuga: *Turns to her sister* The Toybox darkness is a delight, but there's something more fearful about us in light...Koshinryo: *Turns to her sister* So Adam. Eve. Do you take the strawberry from our scale ridden hands?Shuga: Whether you do or not... we will slither through your dreams...Shuga/ Koshinryo: *Simultaneously they turn towards the champions.* A dream blessed with a touch of the macabre! Jason: Let me guess—y’all ladies wanna anotha title match ag’inst us. Well, normally mah brotha and me wouldn’t just give out a title match willy nilly to anybody who axed fer it. Howeva, us White Boys are on the top of our game! We can beat anybody, anywhere, unda any circumstances! So, we’re gonna give y’all a title match. *The crowd pops.* Justin: *grabs the mic* Hell, let’s give ‘em an advantage! Let’s say that they not only can choose where the match will take place but they can also pick the stipulation fer the match! *The crowd pops again.* Jason: A wonderful idea! So, what do y’all ladies say? Koshinryo: Wonder, does this body, how the Boys of White would like our curse.Shuga: The curse of knowing just how thin the balance doth lie on a closed bed of silk.Koshinryo: Thy breath fading as both try to claw out of the inescapable fate.Shuga: Delicious air fleeing from the pink vocal chords as they lie screaming for a moment of tender mercy.Koshinryo: A prison, a box, a coffin of one's ownShuga: A sigh, a whisper, a scream for one's fateKoshinryo: In the land where the sun risesShuga: Two good old boys will be laid for their restKoshinryo: Miserable, miserable, miserable boysShuga: Time to say goodbye, goodbye, and goodbye again...Koshinryo: We accept our fate. Doth thou accept yours?Koshinryo/ Shuga: Time to face what everyone fears. Jason: What in the Sam Hill did you just say!? Justin: *grabbing the microphone* Ain’t it obvious!? It’s a special casket match! There are two caskets—one fer their team and one fer ours. In order ta win, ya gotta put both team members into their casket. God, can’t you understand English? Jason: I got it. I was just makin’ sure you got it. Anyway, we accept! Now, name the place! Shuga: To put it into human terms...the time for you to suffer in peace...Koshinryo: Down, into the depths of an Eastern Wind.Shuga/ Koshinryo: In Good Old Boy terminology…The Japan Mega Show. Jason: Fine! We’ll see y’all there! *Both teams just stare at each other as we cut to commercial.*
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Post by The Latin Lovers on Dec 31, 2008 19:57:46 GMT -5
*We open on the W*I*G Interview Area. John Cena is standing behind the counter with the Latin Lovers.* John Cena: Hello, I’m John Cena. And, to the person who keeps sending me those John Cena bears with the notes on them, STOP IT!!!! I will bring the police into this matter if I have to! Now, to the business at hand—I am here with the Latin Lovers, Guillermo Miramontes and Casimiro Melendez. Guillermo, Casimiro, you two have not been around for a while. In fact, you two seemingly disappeared after Parade of Champions and didn’t show up until W*I*G Gives Thanks. So, just what was behind you absence? Guillermo Miramontes: Well, as you may or may not know, we have been having some problems with a one Tristan Hades. In fact, we made a challenge to him for a match between us and a partner of his choosing, with a little wager: if he won, then I would allow him to whip my back for 30 lashes. However, if we won, then we get to go on a double date with his sisters, Synthy Eris and Lexi Dyionysi. We gave them some time to give us a response. However, instead of a yes or no, Tristan decided to cause us to be eliminated from the Ultimate Endurance match for the W*I*G Tag Team Titles! Casimiro Melendez: *slams his fist on the counter* SON OF A BITCH!!!! Guillermo: As you can see, we didn’t take this well. In fact, we were going to attack Tristan for what he did, but that didn’t happen. Apparently, Tristan and his sisters have disappeared. We have no idea where they have gone. We’ve looked everywhere for them, even going to their usual hangouts in Indianapolis. We even visited their old high school. No such luck. Cena: So, you two have given up your search and returned? Guillermo: Oh no! Quite the contrary. We have comeback to help our search! Casimiro, get the cartons. *Casimiro bends and picks up three milk cartons. He places them on the counter. Then, he turns them, revealing Tristan, Synthy, and Lexi’s faces on the sides of them with “MISSING” underneath their photos.* Guillermo: We have turn to the dairy industry help us find the Olympus Siblings. Casimiro: Don’t forget the phone number. Guillermo: Oh, yeah! Thanks. Cena: Phone number!? What phone number!? Guillermo: We have set up a 1-800 phone line. It is 1-800-Olympus. *1-800-OLYMPUS appears on the screen.* Guillermo: Now, if anyone out there has any information concerning the whereabouts of the Olympus Siblings, just call this number; and our volunteers will stand by to take your information. The number will also be on the milk cartons that contain Tristan, Synthy, or Lexi’s photo. There will be a reward for any information that leads us to them! Cena: A reward! How much!? Guillermo: Five-hundred dollars! I know it’s not much, but it’s all we could afford. Cena: So, you two came back in order to find the Olympus Siblings. That can’t be the only reason, right. Casimiro: Oh no, no, no. We also came back because of a certain online show. Cena: Oh yes. Of course, Casimiro is speaking of James Bon Jovi and The Maxx’s online show Slippery When Wet. They made fun of you a few weeks back. Let’s show that clip: *The clip starts playing.* The Maxx: Hey, y'know what the Latin Lovers did at Halloween Hell? Bon Jovi: What? The Maxx: NOTHING!!! *A picture of The Latin Lovers pops up on screen. A "stamp" appears on screen reading "Latin Losers".* Bon Jovi: But, hark, for I did hear a tale of The Latin Losers' escapades. It goes thusly... *Fade out to a desert scene, albeit, shot in front of an obvious green-screen. The Latin Lovers' music, "El Corazón Del Desierto", can be heard playing in the background. The Maxx is dressed up in a ridiculous looking flamenco dancers outfit, replete with shiny, puffy-sleeved silk shirt & tight pink trousers. He's holding a rope which is attached to a goat. On that goat sits James Bon Jovi. He carries a tiny guitar which he strums at. James is wearing a hideous looking poncho, a ludicrously over-sized sombrero & a big fake moustache.* Bon Jovi: Andale, andale, eypa, eypa! The Maxx: *Thrusts his groin* Viva las Essa Rios! Bon Jovi: Donde esta mi Tequila? The Maxx: Yo Quiero Taco Bell! Bon Jovi: Ethethethe, ethethethethethet, Chris Waddle. The Maxx: Ay Caramba! *He thrusts his groin again.* Bon Jovi: Bono Estente. *Begins strumming his tiny guitar rapidly.* The Maxx: *Does a bit of fancy foot-work on the spot before thrusting his groin* OLÉ! *Fade back to The Maxx & Bon Jovi.* Bon Jovi: ... And that's why they weren't there. *The clips ends. Guillermo and Casimiro look angry.* Cena: There was also an altercation between you guy and them at W*I*G Gives Thanks. I’m guessing this was the reason for that. Guillermo: Yes, it was. Needless to say, we were very upset about it. Casimiro: UPSET! I WAS PISSED OFF! Guillermo: I know! Casimiro didn’t like it. He was very upset about James Bon Jovi’s impersonation of him. Casimiro: Whoa! Wait a minute! Why do you think Bon Jovi was me? Guillermo: Well, clearly The Maxx was me. Casimiro: How so!? Guillermo: He was dressed up like a flamenco dancer. Flamencos come from España, which is my home country. Casimiro: But, Bon Jovi didn’t look like he came from Colombia! He looked like a Mexican! Guillermo: Exactly! Though flamenco dancing really originated in Andalucía, which is in Southern España, and I’m from Madrid, in the center, it’s still from my country. And, while The Maxx was somewhat accurate, Bon Jovi had you coming from a completely different country!? Isn’t that why you were so pissed off? Casimiro: It is now! SON OF A BITCH! *slams his fist on the counter* Guillermo: Calm down. We’ve patched things up with them. No need to get angry. Casimiro: You’re right. I’m sorry. Cena: Wait, you’ve patched things up with James Bon Jovi and The Maxx? Guillermo: Yes, we have. Casimiro: In fact, they have agreed to come out and apologize to us. Cena: Really? Guillermo: Yes! In fact, let’s bring them out now. *Bon Jovi's “Have A Nice Day” plays. A man who looks like James Bon Jovi, only a little shorter and a lot fatter, walks up, holding a chicken. He shakes Guillermo and Casimiro’s hands.* Guillermo: Mr. Bon Jovi, Mr. The Maxx. I have to say, you two look a lot different. Casimiro: It must have been a wild Thanksgiving. “James Bon Jovi”: Oh yeah. It was. I ate a whole turkey. But, The Maxx went on a diet, eating nothing but corn and worms. Isn’t that right, The Maxx? “The Maxx”: Bawkbkawk! Guillermo: Well, that’s interesting. Anyway, I believe you two came out to apologize to us? “James Bon Jovi”: Oh yes. We are very sorry for having made fun of you two. It was clearly jealousy on our parts. I mean, you two are incredibly sexy and good looking. Plus, you get lots of women, many more than me and The Maxx will ever get. We were just envious of all the sex you two have. And, of course, there was some penis envy involved. Guillermo: Of course. “James Bon Jovi”: Anyway, we are truly sorry. “The Maxx”: Bawkbkawk! Casimiro: And, we accept your apology. “James Bon Jovi”: Thank you. And, we heard about you’re little situation with your search for the Olympus Siblings, and I decided to sing a song that reflects your pain. Guillermo: Oh! Well, isn’t that nice! Casimiro: That’s very nice. “James Bon Jovi”: Okay, give me a mic. *Guillermo hands “James Bon Jovi” a microphone. Then, Bon Jovi’s “Runaway” starts playing.* “James Bon Jovi”: On the street where you live Girls talk about their social lives They're made of lipstick, plastic and pink, A touch of sable in their eyes (All your life) All your life all you've asked When's your Daddy gonna talk to you But you were living in another world Tryin' to get a message through No one heard a single word you said They should have seen it in your eyes What was going 'round your head Ooh, she's a little runaway Daddy's girl learned fast All those things he couldn't say Ooh, she's a little runaway A different line every night Guaranteed to blow your mind I see you out on the streets, Call me for a wild time So you sit home alone 'Cause there's nothing left that you can do There's only pictures hung in the shadows Left there to look at you You know she likes the lights at night On the neon Broadway signs She don't really mind, It's only love she hoped to find Ooh, she's a little runaway Daddy's girl learned fast All those things he couldn't say Ooh, she's a little runaway *Suddenly, the chicken takes a huge dump onto “James Bon Jovi” and the floor. The music suddenly stop.* “James Bon Jovi”: SON OF A BITCH!!!! *The imposter Bon Jovi walks off.* Guillermo: How rude! Taking a dump like that! Casimiro: It must be all those worms he eats. *A page walks over to Cena and hands him a message. Then, he walks off as Cena reads the message.* Cena: Hey! Guillermo, Casimiro, I have some good news for you. Guillermo: What is it!? Cena: Synthy Eris and Lexi Dyionysi have been seen backstage. Guillermo: WHAT!!!! Casimiro: Finally! We’ll get some answers! *The Latin Lovers run off as we fade to commercial.*
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Post by Team Raft Shack on Jan 1, 2009 0:28:44 GMT -5
As we return from commercial, we cut to the scene of the WIGSphere once more, as the Colvintron begins to flash and light up once again, the crowd coming to life and cheering slightly, as perhaps some of them may have figured out who is behind these messages, though most of them seem oblivious to it still. Once again, the screen lights up in a flash of rainbow colors, the same distorted song starting to play in the background once again, though this time it seems slightly more coherent. In addition to all this, a rather scrambled image begins to form in the middle of the screen, seeming vaguely familiar, but it's unclear exactly what's it supposed to be at first glance. Soon enough, text once again begins to fill the screen of the Colvintron.
Have you done well?
Only time will tell!
2008 has come and gone!
Who in 2009 will WIG spawn?
The text once again fades away from the screen, after giving everyone enough time to read it of course. Afterwards, another set of strange cryptic messages begin to appear across the Colvintron screen.
Delved Leg Horn
Attach Hunched Eh Hog
A Adopt Inquired
A Boyish Thrill Whit
Flee Forty Worm
A Dreary Potty
Once again, most of the crowd starts writing down each of these bizarre messages, jotting them down to any paper handy, as once again the text disappears, though this time a third message starts to appear on the screen...
The time is near...
1-7-09
With this final date, the screen blanks out once again, as we quickly cut to a video package for a few of the upcoming Colvin Cup matches.
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The Innocent
Opener
Rosie: First Ever WIG Women's Champion
Posts: 88
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Post by The Innocent on Jan 2, 2009 15:01:38 GMT -5
*Vile is walking down the hallway and is heading towards her locker room, looking disgruntled after what happened at WIG Gives Thanks*
Vile: I had Rosie beat. And now I’m told I’m in this Colvin Cup instead of going after Rosie. What else can go wrong?
*Vile opens the door to her locker room and finds Joshua of the Innocent in her locker room meditating, and supporting fresh scars on his back after the Mercy Match.*
Vile: This could go wrong.
Joshua: Hello there. You must be Vile. I'm Joshua... your ally in the Colvin Cup.
Vile: You’re a member of the Innocent, aren’t you?
Joshua: The finest of them all. Or at least that’s what the Keeper tells me.
Vile: So, I’m partnered up with you. Fine, I’m going to have to kill Rosie later. What’s your angle in this?
Joshua: The Keeper paired me up with you to make sure that the Innocent is with the best in the world so that at the end I get my hands on Coltrane and get the WIG World Title for the Innocent. As you could imagine, the reward for you is also there.
Vile: Right, I get a WIG Woman’s title shot. Meaning, I get to send Rosie to the ICU.
Joshua: Maybe, but you need to come with me to discuss strategy. This isn’t the right type of place for the creative juices to flow, so says the Keeper.
Vile: You speak like this keeper is the end all, be all of people.
Joshua: The Keeper is my savior. If it wasn’t for him, I’d be a soulless wretch. I’d be a boil on the butt of society. The Keeper found me, and has saved me.
Vile: Ah. Well, if you want to talk strategy, let’s get going. I have a score to settle with that malcontent Rosie.
Joshua: Okay! But, be careful. The Keeper doesn’t like infighting in his dung…I mean Locker Room.
Vile: Great, I thought I had my fill of nutjobs in EWT. There’s more of them here. Why can’t I end up in a normal federation.
*Joshua and Vile head to the Innocent’s locker room. Joshua, acting all happy-go-lucky and Vile acting serious, enters the locker room. Rosie sees Vile.*
Rosie: WHAT THE (CENSORED) IS SHE DOING IN HERE?!
Earnest: She’s Joshua’s partner, Rosie.
Rosie: I DON’T CARE! SHE SHOULDN’T BE HERE! *Charges Vile*
Joshua: Stop Rosie! Stop!
*Rosie decks Vile, Vile and Rosie get into a big altercation.*
Joshua: Earnest, get Rosie!
Earnest: Right.
*As Earnest and Joshua pull apart the two ladies, an eerie presence steps out of the shadows.*
Keeper: ENOUGH!!!
Joshua: The great one...
Keeper: Settle down, Rosie, Vile.
Vile: Who are you?
Keeper: I’m certain Joshua has told you who I am.
Vile: So, you’re the Keeper.
Keeper: You learn fast. I assume Joshua also told you that I also made this match possible.
Vile: Yes; which still boggles my mind. Why would you suggest me to be paired up with Joshua whereas you have Rosie over there?
Keeper: Simple, Vile. The rest of WIG would have expected me to make a team out of Joshua, Rosie and Earnest. That isn’t smart strategy. So, I’d figure I’d bring in an outside force to supplement my best force in Joshua. You proved your worth to me by going the distance with Rosie and destroying Ykaterina. Now that you know why, it’s time to put this plan into motion.
Vile: Ok, I’m in. I know that if I help you win the Colvin Cup, I get Rosie in a title match.
Keeper: More than that. You get carte blanche to Rosie. Meaning, as many times as you want against Rosie, you can have matches with her for the belt until you win the belt.
Rosie: WHAT???!!!
Vile: You have a deal. Who do we get first?
Keeper: It’s slated to be between you and Joshua taking on…Ryan Bergman
Vile: Who?
Joshua: A Jazz Musician turned wrestler who can’t go more than like 4 minutes.
Vile: Ah, and who else?
Keeper: Ykaterina Milosanova
Vile: She just doesn’t know when to quit.
Rosie: Reminds me of some other broad...
Keeper: QUIET!!! So, Vile; you help us and we’ll help you. What’s your call?
Joshua: Help us, Vile, please?
Earnest: Yes, help us.
Vile: Ok, I’m in.
Keeper: That’s the answer I wanted to hear.
*Vile proceeds to shake hands with the Keeper, then Joshua and finally Earnest, she then heads over to Rosie.*
Rosie: Listen you conniving little bitch, you better hold up your end of the bargain, otherwise that pain that I dealt to ya at W*I*G Gives Thanks, will be a DAMN afterthought compared to what all us will do to ya.
Vile: Just try to keep that belt until after the Colvin Cup ends. Then, it’ll be mine and I’ll prove that I am the real woman’s heavyweight champion.
Keeper: I wouldn’t expect anything less from you. You may leave now, Vile. Get ready, the battle begins soon.
*Vile exits the locker room, Joshua smiles and waves, Earnest nods, and Rosie’s fuming*
Rosie: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT GREAT ONE?!
Earnest: Calm down, Rosie
Rosie: YOU KNOW DAMN WELL THAT I’M THE SUPREME FEMALE IN THIS ORGANIZATION, WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU LET HER HAVE A SPOT WITH JOSHUA INSTEAD OF ME? *goes up to the Keeper and gets in his face*
Joshua: Don’t do it, Rosie
Rosie: I SWEAR, IF THIS PLAN OF YOURS FAILS…
Keeper: *Grabs Rosie by the throat, choking her* THAT’S ENOUGH OF YOUR INSOLENCE! YOU KNOW DAMN WELL THAT YOU WERE BEATEN THAT NIGHT. YOU JUST GOT LUCKY IN THE FACT THAT SHE DIDN’T HAVE ONE SHOULDER UP!!! I’VE PUT MY REPUATION ON THE LINE HERE, AND I WON’T HAVE YOU AROUND THE RING TO MESS THIS UP!!! GOD HELP ME IF YOU DO, BECAUSE I WILL PUT YOU DOWN FROM WHENCE YOU CAME!!! BACK ON THE STREETS, WITHOUT A DIME AND WITHOUT ANY DIGNITY!! NOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!!!
Rosie: *gagging* Yessssss, maaasssstttter
Keeper: *Drops Rosie* GOOD! NOW, LEAVE ME! I HAVE MORE BUSINESS TO TAKE CARE OF!
*The Innocent dispurses and the Keeper is left alone.*
Keeper: It’s only a matter of time before WIG feels the full force of the Innocent. Soon, the entire organization’s soul will be cleansed. However, I sense some souls will refuse to be cleansed. *Grabs a picture of a random WIG Wrestler* If that’s the case, then they shall….*pulls out his Scythe, and tosses the picture up into the air* bEEE….DESTTTRRROOOYEEEDDDDD!!! *Slices picture to shreds* HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
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Fannie Package
Local Talent
W*I*G* Women's Champion
Bigger is Better!
Posts: 21
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Post by Fannie Package on Jan 11, 2009 13:14:52 GMT -5
Howard Finkel: The following contest is a mixed tag team match and is scheduled for ONE fall. It is a part of Round One of the Colvin Cup! Introducing first… *”Ride of the Valkyries” plays on the Colvitron as the mustached, bathrobe-wearing Archibald Barnes steps out onto the stage to a round of cheers and applause. He seems most dignified about it, and makes his way down to the ring.* Finkel: From Albany, New York, at 5 feet 7 inches, weighing in at 119 pounds and making his LONG-awaited return to the ring…ARCHIBALD BARRRRRNES! *Archie looks around at the members of the audience, the flash photography and screaming fans nearly overwhelming him into unconsciousness. He goes up to the ring and tries to haul himself up onto the apron before slipping off and dangling with his hands holding on for dear life. He drops his hat and unties his bathrobe, and by dropping the extra weight goes shooting over the top rope and landing in the ring on his feet. He is wearing long burgundy tights with black vertical stripes, black trunks over the tights, and black wrestling shoes. As his music fades out he turns to the stage.* Tom Bailey: And, we are about to have one of the first round matches in the Colvin Cup. Jeannie Lawless: Good lord! Who’s this old fart? Tom: It’s Archibald Barnes. Jeannie: Good God! He is ugly. Tom: Oh my God! We finally found a man Jeannie isn’t attracted to! Jeannie: Yeah, I wouldn’t touch this guy with a 10 foot pole. Tom: I’m guessing he’s going to be the Mae Young to your Jerry Lawler. Jeannie: You got that right. *Tracy Jones’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em7pn5b4zvsFinkel: And, his partner, coming down the aisle, at 5 feet 8 inches, weighing in at 142 pounds, from Roswell, New Mexico—a member of TNT, TRACY JONES. *Tracy comes out to the boos of the crowd. She is wearing a pink top, pink tights with “TNT” in white down the legs, white wrist tape, and pink boots with “TNT” in white on them. She just looks at the crowd with apathy and then walks down to the ring. Archibald tries to hold the ring ropes open for her, but they slip from underneath him. Tracy just rolls her eyes and enters the ring.* Tom: Well, this should be an interesting pairing. Jeannie: Oh yeah! I don’t see how these two are going to get along. Tracy has shown to be one evil bitch after what she and the rest of TNT has done to L. Rey and James “Magnum” Constance. As for Archibald, well…he’s old and ugly. Tom: Your analysis astounds me. Jeannie: Why, thank you. Tom: That was complementary. Jeannie: I’m gonna take it as such. "Play it back, play it back..." *Nelly Furtado's "Man Eater" plays & Fannie Package steps out on stage as the crowd gives a cheer for the overly-muscular "woman". She's clad in a black leather singlet & boots. Fannie gives a flex of her arms as a large pyro explosion goes off behind her silhouetting her impressive physique.* Finkel: Introducing the opponents, first, from San Francisco, California, standing six feet, three inches tall, she weighs in at 287lbs... FANNIE... PACKAGE! *Rather than carry on down the ramp, she stands off to one side as the familiar Bagpipes fill the air. It soon segues into "School's Out" & Chaz Stone marches out onto the ramp with Lana shortly behind him & the crowd erupts. Chaz is wearing a blue and green bandanna around his forehead, white wrist tape around his hands and wrists, blue leather trousers with a green wingless dragon circling the right knee, and blue wrestling boots.* Finkel: And her tag-team partner, being accompanied to the ring by Lana, from Seattle, Washington, by way of Edinburgh, Scotland, at 6 feet 7 inches, weighing in at 20 & 1/2 Stone... CHAZ... STONE! *Chaz high-fives Fannie & the muscular pair make their way down to the ring and enter it.* Tom: Well, this could be a problem for Tracy and Archibald. Jeannie: No kidding! Fannie and Chaz look like they’re BFFs, while Tracy looks like she’d rather be anywhere but there with Archibald. Tom: Well, if Tracy and Archibald can’t get along, then they’ll be sitting ducks for Fannie and Chaz. *Tracy takes a glance over at Archie, really unsure about this particular pairing she's got involved with. Archie, meanwhile, is looking off into space, desperately trying to remember something. Not for much longer as Chaz clocks him with a clothesline. Archie gets bowled right over & it looks like the match is now officially on...* DING-DING! *Tracy, evidently none too happy about what just happened to her partner, starts having words with Chaz, challenging him to start the match. Chaz, for reasons of chivalry, doesn't want to engage her in combat. Chaz tries to back off a bit, but Tracy won't hear of it. As Chaz makes a move to exit the ring, Tracy grabs him by the arm & yanks him back towards her. He still holds up his hands in defiance. Tracy hauls off & slaps him right across his face. Chaz reels back slightly, holding his cheek. Evidently the slap was pretty stinging. He still refuses to get into it properly with Tracy. Tracy keeps pushing Chaz, trying to goad him into a fight. As she keeps shoving him & prodding his chest, Chaz eventually picks her up over his shoulder & carries her to his corner where he tags in Fannie Package. Chaz dumps Tracy on the mat as he exits, Fannie steps into the ring & is immediately met with another harsh slap from Tracy. Fannie takes a moment to absorb the blow & then decks Tracy with a huge punch that sends the smaller woman halfway across the ring!* Tom: Maybe now Tracy will learn that it's not a great idea to pick a fight with somebody twice your size. Jeannie: At least she's got enough smarts to not challenge Fannie to a test of strength! *Tracy gets to her feet, still reeling slightly from the punch. She still stands up to Fannie Package. Fannie takes another swing at Tracy. Tracy manages to duck it & drops Fannie with a Dropkick to the small of the back. Fannie hits the mat, falling to her knees. Tracy runs the ropes & hits Fannie with another Dropkick, this time to the ribs. Fannie goes rolling across the mat a little bit. Tracy follows up with a few more kicks & stomps on Fannie. Tracy finishes off with an Elbow Drop right onto Fannie's chest.* Tom: Seems as if Tracy's managed to find Fannie's weakness. Jeannie: Hey, if you're getting the shit kicked out of you I'd like to see how much of a fight YOU manage to put up! *Tracy tries, unsuccessfully, to drag Fannie's huge form over to her own corner. She abandons the immense muscle woman in the middle of the ring & stomps to her corner to make a tag to Barnes. Barnes enters the ring to a huge ovation. He approaches Fannie & weakly tries to lift Fannie. In the end, Fannie manages to stand under her own power. She forces away Barnes' arms & whips him to the ropes. He hits the ropes & bounds back. Fannie sends him flying with a Back Body Drop!* Jeannie: HOLY CRAP! That big beast nearly sent him out of the ring! Tom: Archibald Barnes' first match in decades was nearly turned into his retirement match! *Fannie yanks Barnes to his feet before he can even roll in the general direction of his corner to tag in Tracy. Archie slaps Fannie so weakly she barely feels it. From his standing position she lifts him straight up into a Gorilla Press. She presses the tiny frail man's body a few times to the cheers of the crowd. She even presses him with a single arm for a few seconds before throwing him into her own corner where she makes the tag to Chaz.* Tom: Barnes isn't really on form tonight like he used to be when he wrestled Frank Gotch & Lou Thesz. Jeannie: Oh, those guys SUCKED! Lou Thesz was so full of himself! "My grandma could do a more graceful Leg Drop than Hulk Hogan." Whatever... *Chaz enters the ring & lifts up Barnes. He looks even more uneasy about tussling with Barnes than he did with Tracy. Barnes looks a little awkward on his feet. Chaz lifts him up for a Suplex & takes him right over immediately. He's surprised by the lack of weight. Chaz looks sympathetically down at Barnes & whips Barnes back to his own corner. Barnes collapses against the turnbuckles & Tracy slaps Barnes on the chest, making a tag. Chaz stays in the ring a moment & even takes up a fighting stance, but his heart isn't really in it. Tracy charges right at him & smashes him with a running shining wizard. Chaz falls down & Tracy goes for a cover...* Ref: 1... 2... KICKOUT! *And a kickout with authority at that as Chaz virtually bench presses Tracy into the air. Tracy lands on the mat again a few feet from where Chaz launched her.* Tom: Tracy Jones nearly gets a 3 count with Velocity, but it isn’t enough to keep Chaz Stone down. Hell, he nearly launched out of the ring. Jeannie: I like that in a man: strength, roughness, aggression, not wanting to lay down so you have to be really rough with him to get him to do what you want… *long pause* I’m sorry, what were we talking? Tom: I was calling the match, and you were having one of your fantasies. *He stands again & tries to reach out to Fannie, but Tracy is just too quick for him & wants to show she can take it to him. She runs at him from behind & traps him in a schoolboy (girl?) pin, bit Chaz manages to roll right on through & escape the pin attempt. As soon as Chaz has rolled back to his feet again, he's down in a three-point stance, he runs right at Tracy & demolishes her with a Spear. Chaz holds his head for a moment as he realizes just what he's done. He makes a tag to Fannie & leaves the ring a little bit ashamed of himself.* Tom: Chaz not a bit happy about hitting that spear on Tracy. Jeannie: It's about time he got more involved here. It's an intergender match. He'll have to hit the li'l lady eventually! *Fannie enters the ring, getting a bit more fired up now that Chaz finally has his head in the game. Tracy is still reeling from the Spear Chaz hit her with. Fannie yanks Tracy up to her feet. Tracy surprises Fannie by leaping up onto her shoulders. Tracy spins around on Fannie's shoulders & uses as much momentum as she can to roll forward & trap Fannie in a Victory Roll...* Ref: 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Fannie barely manages to escape.* Tom: Nice counter from Tracy. Fannie almost didn’t kick out. Jeannie: Well, I’m not surprised. Fannie is a strong woman. Those muscles aren’t just fluff. They really work and look really good. Tom: Look really good!? Jeannie: What? Tom: You just said that Fannie’s muscles looked good. Jeannie: No, I didn’t! You’re making things up!!!! *Tracy emerges with a smirk on her face, knowing that she has Fannie's number. Tracy whips Fannie towards the corner & follows up quickly afterwards by nailing Fannie in the chest with a Double Charging Knee Strike. Tracy leaps to the top & comes crashing down on Fannie with a split legged corkscrew moonsault. The ref makes the count again...* Ref: 1... 2... KICKOUT! *Fannie powers out yet again.* Tom: F = MA to Fannie Package, but Fannie powers out yet again. Jeannie: Fannie is really powerful, and she looks like she knows how to handle a woman. Tom: What!? Jeannie: I didn’t say that! What the hell is wrong with me!? *Tracy gets up and faces Fannie, who’s back up to her feet. Fannie attempts to grab Tracy for a bearhug but misses the mark as Tracy quickly slips behind her and hits her with a number of forearms to the small of the back, followed by a chop block to knock her off of her feet. Tracy turns around and drops a few elbows in an attempt to keep Fannie down and follows up with a flurry of stomps to her legs. Tracy follows up with an inverted Texas cloverleaf, twisting Fannie’s tree-trunk like legs as if they were pretzels.* Jeannie: She’s got that Heap of Metal locked in tight! Tom: You can tell she’s working hard to keep her team even with Chaz and Fannie, and judging by the strategy she’s using on Fannie, she might just be able to do that. Jeannie: You got that right. She really needs to stay on top of Fannie. Lucky girl. Tom: What!? Jeannie: Goddammit! What is wrong with me!? *But while the Heap of Metal is certainly locked in tight, Fannie’s superior strength is enabling her to power out of this too. Forcefully she lifts herself up as the crowd looks on in awe. Immediately Tracy releases the hold and turns around, running into the ropes and rebounding for a spinning head scissors, taking Fannie back onto her…back. Tracy then climbs the turnbuckle and leaps off for a moonsault, but Fannie is in good enough shape that she gets back up to her feet before Tracy is able to leap off, catches her in mid-air, and powerslams her onto the mat. Tracy, a bit dazed and near her corner, instinctively makes the tag to Archibald Barnes who claps his hands as the audience erupts into cheers again as he enters the ring. Archie puffs out his chest and marches towards Fannie Package, who while ready to make the tag while Tracy was still in the ring turns 180 degrees to face Barnes. Tracy climbs out of the ring, and realizing what she just did, face-palms.* Jeannie: Well she certainly isn’t happy about how she just escaped the wrath of that thing Fannie Package…what an ingrate! Tom: I’m not so sure about that. No matter what she gets hit with, and I hate to say this, but I think she has a far greater chance of winning this alone than Barnes has of staying awake for the rest of the match. Jeannie: Awake!? That’s kind of you, because I’m afraid Barnes will probably keel over into a coma. *Archibald wiggles his spindly fingers and twitches his mustache, signaling to Fanny that he wants a test of strength. Fannie looks around, shocked, but does not hesitate, smiling gruffly as she locks up with the much tinier Barnes. Not even for a split second are they engaged in the lock-up as she merely pushes forward and Archie rockets backward into the ropes, bouncing off and coming towards Fannie. Package throws a clothesline but Archibald ducks, ricocheting off the ropes and interlocking his fingers, cups his hands and throws them over Fannie’s lantern jaw.* Tom: It’s the…Sarsaparilla Chinstrap, and the crowd is on their feet! Just look at how he masterfully has that maneuver locked in! Jeannie: No he doesn’t! Tom: You mean “Yes he does!” Jeannie: They don’t pay me enough for this… *Fannie makes the tag and Chaz Stone reluctantly comes into the ring, grabbing Archibald Barnes by the legs and hitting him with a slingshot that sends him across the ring. Archibald gets up but instead of making the tag to Tracy, who’s eager to get back into the action, turns back to face Chaz Stone and runs at him at full speed. The fans are impressed with the old man’s apparent velocity while running, and he leaps into the air and turns his body 180 degrees, hitting Chaz with the Invisible Ottoman (flying butt)! Chaz however does not budge an inch and Archie deflects, rocketing across the ring again and landing near his team’s corner. Analyzing the situation for a few seconds and scratching his moon-bald head, he turns around and tags Tracy. She enters the ring, turning to make sure that Archibald is on the apron. Then, she charges at Chaz, but he catches her and hits her with a one-handed spinebuster.* Tom: Seattle Spinebuster to Tracy Jones. Despite that, Tracy seems more than excited to be back in the ring with the fact that Archibald Barnes isn’t trying anymore showboating against their opponents for this evening. Jeannie: Archie probably doesn’t even weigh as much as one of the wooden planks they make those kinds of ships with, even when he’s soaking wet with a brick in each pocket. *Chaz allows Tracy to get back up. She does and dropkicks Chaz. He staggers back a little. She gets up again and dropkicks Chaz again. Again, he staggers back but not much. Tracy looks frustrated. She gets up again and dropkicks Chaz once more, causing him stagger back a little. Tracy slaps the mat in frustration and gets up. She walks straight up to Chaz and hauls off and slaps him hard with her right hand. Chaz’s cheek immediately turns beet red. The audience lets out a shocked groan. Tracy yells at Chaz, “Come on ya fuckin’ pussy!” Then, she slaps Chaz with her left hand. “C’mon pussy!” she yells again. Then, Tracy unleashes a flurry of slaps from both sides onto Chaz. Eventually, Chaz snaps and punches Tracy hard. She falls to the mat but gets up. However, Chaz charges at Tracy and hits her with a running knee.* Tom: Sweet Yeti of the Serengeti! Tracy’s gone crazy Eddie in the heady! Jeannie: I don’t know why she was trying to goad Chaz Stone into attacking her, but it worked. *Chaz picks up Tracy and hits her with a reverse suplex. Then, he gets up and drops a leg onto her. Then, Chaz gets up, grabs her legs, swings her around several times, and then lets go. Tracy lands hard onto the mat and nearly rolls out of the ring. As she gets up, Chaz walks over to her, grabs her, and hits her with a Russian leg sweep. Chaz gets up again. This time, he grabs Tracy by her hair and throws her across the ring. She gets up, grabbing her head and checking her hair. She charges at Chaz, but he stops her with a kick. Then, Chaz hoists Tracy onto his shoulders, cups her feet, backs into the ropes, bounces off of them, runs across the ring, and tosses Tracy over the opposite ropes. She lands with a backflip onto the outside. The audience lets out a groan and then applauds the move.* Tom: Hey Macarena! What a Caber Toss from Chaz Stone! Jeannie: If she wanted to get Chaz into this match, then Tracy did it and then some! *Suddenly, Archibald runs into the ring and attacks Chaz from behind. He turns Chaz around and tries to whip him across the ring. However, Chaz reverse and whips Archibald across the ring. He bounces off the ropes, and Chaz grabs him, hitting him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Archibald falls onto the mat, holding his back. He picks up Archibald and whips him into a neutral corner. Then, Chaz charges at Archibald and hits him with a spear. Archibald clutches over in pain. Chaz walks away from the corner and then charges back, trying to hit Archibald with a running Yakuza kick. However, Archibald falls to the mat. Chaz is unable to stop himself and hits the corner.* Tom: Chaz goes for a running Yakuza kick, but Archibald manages to duck it. Or, he just fell out of pain from that spear and just plain being tired. Jeannie: You know, Archibald was trying to come to Tracy’s aid. Though he failed at first, he now may have inadvertently succeeded. *The referee checks on Archibald. Meanwhile, Tracy gets up. She sees Chaz trying to move away from the corner. So, she pulls his leg from under him, causing Chaz to fall onto the mat and getting his right leg caught up into the ropes. Tracy gets onto the apron and starts attacking Chaz’s legs. Fannie enters the ring to help her partner, but the referee sees her enter the ring and stops her. She tries to tell the referee what is going on. However, Archibald gets up. He sees Fannie, charges at her, and hits her with a forearm shot to the side of her head. As the referee tries to break them apart, Tracy continues to work over Chaz’s right knee. Eventually, Fannie gets fed up and shoves Archibald off of her. He staggers back with such force that he lands back first onto Chaz’s knee. Tracy moves away from Chaz, Fannie looks shock and upset about what has happened, Chaz finally gets unhooked from the ropes and falls to the mat, and Archibald falls face first onto the mat.* Tom: Oh no! Fannie tried to come to Chaz’s aid, but she may have accidentally caused more damage to Chaz’s knee. Jeannie: Not only that, but I think Archibald is dead. Did you see the way he fell onto the mat? It looked like the big one, Elizabeth. Tom: Jeannie! That’s horrible! Jeannie: Don’t walk into the light Archibald! W*I*G can’t afford the lawsuit! *Fannie checks on Chaz, but the referee forces her to leave the ring. Archibald slowly gets up and crawls out of the ring. And, Tracy reenters the ring. She places Chaz’s right leg onto the bottom rope, jumps up, and drops down onto Chaz’s knee. She jumps up and drops down on Chaz’s knee again. She jumps up again, but this time Chaz gets his good leg up onto Tracy’s butt and pushes her over the top rope. She lands onto the floor mat and the audience cheers.* Tom: Chaz still has some fight left in him. He really needs to go tag in Fannie before Tracy can work over that knee anymore. Jeannie: I like a man with some fight left in him. Tom: Nice to see that you’re back to normal. Well, at least as long as Fannie isn’t in the ring. Jeannie: What’s that suppose to mean!? Tom: Nothing. Jeannie: Look! Fannie is an attractive woman, and if I were gay… Tom: Wow! You’re thinking about another woman! Jeannie: No! I mean…you’re putting words into my mouth!!!! *Chaz gets up and limps over to his corner. Just as he’s about to tag in Fannie, Tracy runs into the ring and clips Chaz’s bad knee. He falls to the mat, grabbing his knee. Then, Tracy gets up, grabs his bad leg, and starts kicking the back of Chaz’s leg several times. Then, Tracy places her right knee under Chaz’s right knee and DDTs his knee onto hers.* Tom: Tracy stops Chaz from getting the tag and goes to work on his knee. Jeannie: Smart move. Keep the big man down so that he can’t overpower Tracy or tag in Fannie. Tom: If she keeps it up, then Tracy might be able to pull off the victory for her team. *Tracy gets up and kicks the back of Chaz’s knee a few more times. Then, she rolls Chaz over onto his stomach, picks up Chaz’s leg, and slams it knee first onto the mat. She picks it up and slams it again. She picks up Chaz’s leg and slams it onto the mat again and again and again and again. Then, Tracy wraps her legs around Chaz’s bad knee and hits him with a Garvin stomp. Chaz yells out in pain. Then, Tracy rolls Chaz back onto this back and locks him into an inverted cloverleaf.* Tom: And now, Tracy locks Chaz into the Heap of Metal. Jeannie: If she can keep it on him, then this match could be over. *Tracy has the move locked on tight. Chaz slaps the mat a few times. He looks to be in great pain. Then, a “Chaz” chant breaks out in the crowd. It’s quiet at first, but then it gains momentum. After a few minutes, Chaz pushes up off the mat. The “Chaz” chants get louder. Then, he starts to pull himself and Tracy to the ropes. The “Chaz” chants get louder. Tracy tries to pull him back, but she’s just not as strong as him. Then, he reaches the ropes and grabs them. The crowd cheers wildly. But, Tracy doesn’t release the hold. So, the ref does a 5 count.* Ref: 1…2…3…4…*Tracy lets go of the hold.* Tom: Chaz uses his strength to pull himself to the ropes. Now, he desperately needs to tag in Fannie. Jeannie: He better hurry before Tracy pounces back onto him. I know I would pounce on Fannie…I mean, Chaz!!!! I would pounce on Chaz!!!! Tom: Wow…just…wow. *Tracy immediately charges at Chaz as he gets up. However, Chaz just pushes her away. She hits the mat and rolls over. Chaz limps over to his corner, inches away from tagging in Fannie. However, Tracy charges at Chaz, jumps onto him, and hits him with a running double knee chestbreaker.* Tom: Holy moly! Tracy stops Chaz from getting a tag with the Train Crash. Jeannie: I would like to reiterate that I meant to say that I wanted to pounce onto Chaz. Not Fannie, CHAZ! Tom: Will you give it a rest!? There’s a match going on, and no one really cares! Jeannie: Once again, I mean Chaz, not Fannie! Though, she is quite attractive, but I mean that in a platonic heterosexual way! *Tracy grabs Chaz’s leg and pulls him to the center of the ring. She goes for another Heap Of Metal, but Chaz manages to push her off with his legs. Tracy falls to the mat but jumps back up. Chaz is also able to get onto his feet. Tracy charges at him and hits him with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors. However, the move places him closer to his corner. Fannie reaches out for the tag. Tracy jumps up and charges at Chaz to stop him, but Chaz ducks and back body drops her over the top rope and to the outside. Then, Chaz jumps over to his partner and tags her. The crowd erupts in cheers.* Tom: Finally, Chaz is able to tag in Fannie Package. Jeannie: It’s nice to see her in the ring, and I mean that in a non-sexual way. Tom: You’re just digging your own grave deeper and deeper. *Fannie enters the ring, but so does Archibald. He charges at Fannie and somehow takes her down with a Lou Thesz press. After a few punches to the head, Archibald gets up and locks Fannie into a thigh lock. However, Fannie uses her free leg to push him off. Archibald falls back into the ropes and bounces off of them. Fannie gets up, grabs Archibald, and hits him with a power slam.* Tom: Fannie powerslams Archibald Barnes. Jeannie: You know, this is the second time that he’s come into the ring after Tracy has been thrown out. He must think that’s part of the rules. Tom: Why? Jeannie: Because, he’s old, and that’s an old rule. I figure you would know that. Tom: Oh yeah. Your crush on Fannie Package has thrown me off my game. Jeannie: I don’t have a crush on her! *Fannie picks up Archibald and throws him out of the ring. Suddenly, Tracy runs back into the ring and charges at Fannie; but Fannie catches her, picks her up in a gorilla press, holds her for a few minutes, and then drops Tracy to the mat with a gorilla press slam. Fannie pulls Tracy up by her hair and hits her with several girly slaps. Then, Fannies hits her with the Coin Purse (a hard slap to the face). Tracy falls back into the ropes, holding her face. Fannie grabs, picks her up for a suplex, holds her for almost two minutes, and then drops her down with a suplex. Fannie gets up, picks up Tracy by her hair, and then bodyslams her to the mat.* Tom: Man, Fannie Package is just toying with Tracy Jones. This must be a little revenge for Chaz’s knee. Jeannie: I would love for Fannie to toy with me. Tom: In a straight, non-sexual. Jeannie: Uh…yeah! Of course! That’s the ticket! *Then, Archibald runs back into the ring. He jumps onto Fannie’s back, going for a sleeper hold; but Fannie just flings him off. Archibald gets up and tries to attack Fannie again, but Chaz grabs him. Then, Archibald attacks Chaz. The referee tries to break them up and get them out of the ring. Meanwhile, Tracy pulls out a pair of brass knucks from her tights, placing them on her right hand. She gets up and tries to punch Fannie, but Fannie ducks. Tracy swings around, and Fannie grabs and picks her up into a torture rack.* Tom: And now Fannie has Tracy in the torture rack. Jeannie: But Tracy has a pair of brass knuckles. She pulled them out while the ref was distracted by Archibald and Chaz. *The ref is trying to pull Chaz and Archibald apart and get them back into their corners, but he’s having some difficulty. Suddenly, all three men fall out of the ring. Meanwhile, Fannie still has Tracy in the torture rack. But, Tracy hits Fannie in the head with those brass knucks. However, Fannie doesn’t let go of the hold. So, Tracy hits her again and again and again. Finally, Fannie starts to stumble around and drops Tracy. Tracy gets up, turns Fannie around, and punches her hard in the face. Fannie falls to the mat.* Tom: I don’t believe this! Tracy has knocked out Fannie with those brass knuckles thanks to the referee being distracted by Chaz Stone and Archibald Barnes. Jeannie: Dammit! If Tracy has hurt Fannie’s handsome face… *Tracy waits in the corner for Fannie to get up hoping to hit her again. Suddenly, the crowd starts cheering at James “Magnum” Constance runs into the ring. Tracy tries to hit him with the brass knuckles, but he ducks. Then, he punches Tracy a few times and then hits her with a throat-first flapjack onto the top rope followed by a clothesline. Magnum then grabs the brass knucks and exits the ring.* Tom: It’s James “Magnum” Constance! He just hit Tracy with Kiss The Sabre and took away the brass knucks! Jeannie: Magnum! Thank God! I need to see him after the match! *On the outside, the referee finally separates Chaz and Archibald, mainly due to Archibald getting tired and running out of breath. Chaz limps back to this corner while Archibald takes a breather, sitting down on top of Howard Finkel. Finkel tries to get Archibald off of him. The referee reenters the ring as both women slowly get up. Tracy goes for a punch, but Fannie blocks it. She kicks Tracy in the stomach and hits her with a powerbomb. Then, Fannie tags in Chaz. He enters the ring as Fannie picks up Tracy. She throws Tracy to Chaz, and he picks her up for a torture rack. Suddenly, Archibald runs into the ring and charges at Fannie. However, Fannie catches him, picks him up, and puts him on top of Tracy for a double torture rack. Then, they hit Tracy and Archibald with an inverted Death Valley driver. Then, Chaz rolls Archibald off of Tracy and pins Tracy The ref goes for the count.* Ref: 1... 2... 3! *The bell rings, the crowd pops, and Fannie’s music plays.* Finkel: Here are your winners—the team of FANNIE PACKAGE AND CHAZ STONE. Tom: Fannie Package and Chaz Stone get the win with a double torture rack into a pair of inverted Death Valley drivers. What an impressive maneuver. Jeannie: With a little assist from James “Magnum” Constance. *The referee raises both their arms in victory as the crowd cheers them. Then, Chaz and Fannie exit the ring and walk up the ramp to the backstage area.* Tom: Well, Fannie Package and Chaz Stone will be moving on to the next round. Jeannie: Good for them. They are both great competitors who deserved to win. Tom: And, you find both of them attractive. Jeannie: Yes…well…Chaz is sexy… and Fannie…um…SHUT UP!!!! *As Fannie and Chaz leave, Archibald reenters the ring to check on Tracy. Suddenly, TNT’s music plays. www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCX8gDW4YS0 Then, Toby Nicholas Tucker comes out, wearing a white Western-style button and collar shirt, blue jeans, and black cowboy boots. The crowd boos him mercilessly. As he walks to the ring, Archibald helps Tracy up, and she ends up pulling him down onto the mat in the process. TNT then enters the ring.* Tom: What is TNT doing out here? Jeannie: Who cares!? He’s a sexy man, and we could use that right now! I know I could. *TNT talks to Tracy as Archibald gets up. Then, he walks over to Archibald and yells “What happened?” Archibald doesn’t know what to say and looks very apologetic. Suddenly, TNT kicks him hard in the stomach. The crowd boos this move. Then, TNT grabs him, picks him in a straight jacket hold, and hits him with a sitout powerbomb.* Tom: What the hell!? TNT just hit Archibald Barnes with the Explosion Bomb. Jeannie: He must be upset that Tracy lost the match! Tom: It wasn’t Archibald’s fault! Magnum came out here, most likely to get revenge for what TNT did to him and L. Rey! Jeannie: I doubt TNT cares. *Then, TNT picks up Archibald and hits him with a reverse thrown F-5 into a forward Russian leg sweep. Then, TNT gets up, and he and Tracy leave as the crowd boos them.* Tom: And now, TNT hits him with Dynamite! This is uncalled for! Jeannie: Wow! These guys are sore losers! Tom: Well, one of these days they are going to get what is coming to them. Jeannie: And, I bet ya that Magnum wants to be the one who gives it to them. *Cut to commercial.*
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Jack Jupiter
Local Talent
I'm the REAL Jack Jupiter!
Posts: 10
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Post by Jack Jupiter on Jan 11, 2009 20:08:08 GMT -5
*Fade in to the interior a limousine, with the smiling face of Jack Jupiter being the focus of the camera. He looks a little better groomed than usual.*
Jack: Hello again, my loyal Realists! It is I, Jack Jupiter, aficionado of awesomosity and boy do I have some news for you! As it turns out, a young director fellow has pieced together a film he so-calls “Life Under the Knife: the Endless Toil of a Beautiful Celebrity” and invitations have been handed out to its big premier, right here in San Diego! Well far be it from true that he actually could have forgotten to invite none other than everyone’s favorite idol, so I decided I might as well swing by and not disappoint the throng of screaming fans waiting at the red-carpet premier. I just have to show them who I am and no doubt about it, they’ll let me into this great little mess!
*The black limo reaches a partial roadblock on the street it drives on to, as a security guard walks up to the side of the vehicle and, holding a pencil and clipboard, asks for identification.*
Guard: Hang on, hang on! I need to see your identification. Excuse me, who’s there?
*The window rolls down, revealing Jack’s blonde head poking out through it.*
Jack: Jack Jupiter! The REAL Jack Jupiter, to be precise.
Guard: *examining the clipboard* Um, yeah, you’re definitely not anywhere on this list…
Jack: Yeah, that’s definitely a typo. I’m pretty sure about that.
Guard: Um, no, I don’t think so. I’m sorry, Mr. “Jupiter”—if that IS your real name—
Jack: WHAT? Doubting REALITY?!?!?! Well, I’m afraid I’m going to have to disprove you. I most certainly am allowed to pass through. *Jack snaps his fingers*
*A side door opens next to the guard, showing the women known as Dreia Borbone. Unlike Jack, she has dressed in what was last seen worn by her: a shirt button up shirt, black vest, red tie, black gloves, black slacks, and black dress shoes. She rolls her neck back and walks towards the guard.*
Guard: Just who might YOU be?
*She stops right in front of him and holds out her hand.*
Dreia: Clipboard.
Guard: Yeah, right. I'm not giving this thing to you...
*She blankly stares at him then looks over at her employer.*
Guard: I'm sorry...I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Jack: No, I'm going to have to ask YOU to leave, if you don't want to wake up half naked and bloodied in the middle of Mexico...believe me, it's happened before...
*As the guard approaches her to escort her back to the car, she rears back and headbutts him right in the nose. His face erupts in a spray of red liquid. As he falls the clipboard goes flying in the air, right into Dreia's outstretched hand. She graps the pen, wiping the blood on her face with a sleeve, and checks off a name.*
Dreia: Jupiter.
Jack: I think everything's in order, sir...mind of we pass now?
Guard: *laying somewhere off-screen* Yeah...go ahead...*his voice trails off*
*She throws the clipboard down upon the guard.*
*The camera cuts back to the interior of the limo, Jack's face being the only thing visible once again.*
Jack: See, when Jack Jupiter comes to a shindig, hootenanny, or allied assembly of peons, he requires no invitation. Because quite simply, being the life of the part as I am, Jack Jupiter IS the invitation.
*Cutting back outside, the limo arrives at the front of the theater. It goes screeching into the center of the camera's view, a random toothpick-thin blonde bimbo posing in her gown for the evening in the foreground. The cameras are on her, until the limo door opens and out flies Jack Jupiter, decked in what looks to be a tuxedo, but with a hulking fur coat (with, for no apparent reason, a red cape under it), several leather belts, several emblazoned handkerchiefs around his neck and a huge pair of aviator sunglasses. He poses, flashbulbs going off and a murmur of confusion, and Dreia nondescriptly departs the vehicle and closes the door behind him.*
Jack: See? What did I tell you? The crowd loves me! They even prepared this red carpet just for me--and hours before I even came here, no less! Talk about thoughtfulness...
*The Italian blonde takes out a cloth and boredly wipes her face in response to Jack.*
*The woman in front of Jack, now with the cameras no longer interested in her admittedly generic features, turns around and begins to lambast him with a number of obscenities we'd rather not mention...*
Jack: *confused* And just who are WE now, verbally assaulting the REAL Jack Jupiter and attempting to ruin everyone's moment? Their moment to bask in witnessing me--yes, ME--spending my time here?
*Jack snaps his fingers*
Jack: Say Dreia, you mind inspiring this young lady with a bit of courtesy for a moment? She'd be wise to clear the way for the REAL star of the show.
*Dreia takes off her shades, revealing half-eyelid covered brown eyes. To say she looks bored is an understatement. The bodyguard walks up to the diva, who mouths off at her as well. Dreia changes directions while walking, looking away from the woman. As she walks by her, a gloved hand lands on the generic blonde's face. Instantly the blonde is propelled back through the paper back drop. The look on Jack's employee doesn't change as she keeps walking.*
Jack: Wow, people even clear the path for me...you can't find many people like that these days. Well, except for her appearance, I think Steve Seagal's facial expressions are more unique than her...ahem ANYWAY...
*The camera cuts to the interior of the lavishly decorated theater, and it seems most of the actual celebrities have been seated.*
Jack: We're here for a good movie, but what's a good movie without good food? The snack bar is the obvious place to indulge one's...hunger...tooth...and the lines seem to be nonexistent right now!
*The ridiculously-attired Jack Jupiter approaches the counter and leans over it, looking at the items on the menu and groaning in disgust as he reads them off.*
Jack: Popcorn? Lame. Hot dog? Ew. Nachos? Blech. All this food sucks! I want PHEASANT.
Clerk: I'm afraid we don't sell that here, sir. We're a theater, not a gourmet restaurant.
Jack: Listen, monkey-person, I want PHEASANT. And when I say "I want PHEASANT," what do you think that means, exactly?
Clerk: But...we don't have any in stock. Nor have we ever had any in stock.
Jack: *sighing* Fine. I guess the REAL Jack Jupiter has to do this himself.
*Jack snaps his fingers*
Jack: ...PHEASANT!
*A flick of a hand from out of Dreia's vest pocket reveals a small phone. She presses a few numbers then replaces back into its home.*
Jack: And now to play the waiting ga—
*Suddenly, a chef bursts through the doors with a food cart and a covered-up tray.*
Chef: Master Jupiter, your meal has arrived...for the first course, we have brought you your favorite kind of salad...
The chef uncovers the tray, revealing a bowl on it filled with nothing but croutons and a single piece of lettuce.*
Jack: Excellent! Wheel that down to my seat. I'll make sure that the pathway is cleared for both my meal, and my shining person.
*Jack points to the crowded theater aisle, visible through the nearby doorway, and snaps his fingers.*
*The doors are kicked open. Dull, bored eyes survey the aisle, making those standing retreat in their seats... Perhaps thinking, thanks to her attire, that she works there. The doors close in front of her, to which she stares blankly back at Jack. Jack tilts his head at the chef and the two make their way down the aisle. As he takes a seat and Dreia takes her seat next to him, the chef brings the cart to Jack and hands him a fork, as the movie begins*
Jack: And now...to ENJOY THE MOVIE!
*Paying no attention to the speaking going on between the actors, he tosses the fork behind him as someone off-camera yelps in pain and he lifts the bowl to head-level, tilting it and swallowing all of the croutons before loudly and obnoxiously chewing them up.*
Jack: *Loudly, with his mouth full* Dahmn, thiff iff a gauh mooie!
*A patron behind him gets up out of his seat and looks at Jack from behind*
Patron: Uh, could you please quiet down?
Jack: *swallowing his "salad"* NO thank you...
*He notices the "second course," a bowl of hot mushroom soup now in front of him. He picks it up, looks at it, looks at Dreia, and then looks at the patron, before snapping his fingers yet again. *Without even standing or looking at the patron, she just elbows backward straight into his gut. He doubles over, as Jack quickly slides the bowl of hot soup under his face, causing the patron to drop their face into the soup, just from the impact of the elbow. He lets off a loud scream as Jack rolls his eyes and turns around.*
Jack: The NERVE of some people...ruining my movie. CAN YOU SHUT UP ALREADY? PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO ENJOY THIS FINE PIECE OF AMERICAN FILM.
*Jack sees a dialogue scene from the movie and frowns, folding his arms.*
Jack: What the hell is this?!
*Cutting to much later in the movie, during a much more dramatic scene, Jack is given his final "course"--a roasted pheasant, golden-brown. Ignoring the nearby utensils, he begins to dig into the bird, clawing at it like a rabid wolf while everyone else--except for Dreia, who nondescriptly stares at the movie, her arms folded over her chest--is erupting into tears.*
Jack: *eating* Oh come on! How can't this be a happy ending? Jack Jupiter's been fed with the highest quality foods! How is this not a momentous occasion to celebrate his hour of feasting? Forget this movie...we need to get someone to record this! Stat! *He snaps his fingers once again.*
*She reaches into her pockets again, this time withdrawing a small digital camera. As it flicks on, recording his "celebration" she continues to stare ahead.*
Jack: Oh crap...I need to look the part for THIS opportunity...*He stands up as tall as his frame can reach and jumps onto his seat, posing with the shredded remains of the roasted pheasant. The movie camera, higher up in the theater but angled downwards, is blocked by his figure. What's left of the movie is entirely projected onto his body, and everyone else--except for the entirely bored Dreia, of course--boos him at the top of their lungs. The generic blonde from earlier, more than a bit steamed by his antics, steps up to him and tugs on the train of his immense fur coat.*
Generic Blonde: You ruined this for—
Jack: Yourself! *Raising his voice and speaking towards everyone else* Ladies and gentlemen, as a result of the disruption that you have caused, ruining this movie for ME, I must say that I have to leave, as all of you are completely undeserving of my presence. However, fear not, for I will retire happily this evening. Someone's obviously feeling rather "touchy-feeler" for the REAL Jack Jupiter, and I JUST HAPPEN to be in the mood for it, lucky for them...
*Jack glances at the "Generic Blonde" as he smirks and quickly snaps his fingers.*
Jack: Let's not reject the advances of this bodacious babe, shall we?
*Dreia, still staring at the movie screen as if the movie is still playing, slowly rising and pops her neck. She gives a punch to the woman's abdoment and throws her genericness over her shoulder.*
Jack: And awaaaaaaaaay we go!
*The camera cuts back to the limo, Jack apparently being driven away from the disaster of a movie he partook in.*
Jack: What a great evening! I'm glad most of my nights can be this enjoyable. I mean sure, the people had to suffer the fate of me leaving them, but a young woman will now have the opportunity to have all of JUPITER for herself...
*The camera pans to the blonde who offers no resistance, Dreia Borbone sitting with the blonde between her and Jack, and staring blankly.*
Jack: Quite a luxury indeed, wouldn't you say, Dreia?
Dreia: ...Garbage.
Jack: Yeah, they were garbage, Dreia. They were definitely garbage....
...but not Jack Jupiter! And that is why, good people, when I join Wrestling's Innovative Genesis, I will COME FULL FORCE...I er...I mean, I will join in the fun with my excellent...stylings...and...good...looks...and...yeah! So write that down, put it in your shoe and read it! Cause W*I*G, the REAL Jack Jupiter's on his way, he's packin' more heat than a radiator, and he'll be there soon...when you least expel it...
Dreia: *yawns and folds arms.* Thesaurus.
Jack: The Saurus?! OH MY GOD! He's coming to get us! Driver! Put the metal to the peddle! And Dreia...prepare to defend me at all costs...this is gonna be a hell of a fight...
*The limousine zooms away as the camera fades out.*
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ragnal
Opener
Doesn't like pretty pictures below his username.
Posts: 83
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Post by ragnal on Jan 17, 2009 12:43:09 GMT -5
*We return to the scene of the WIG-Sphere, as the next match is about to get underway. WIG's own Howard Finkel is standing by.*
Finkel: The following contest is a first round match up in the Colvin Cup! The winners of this match will move on to the next round!
Jeannie: Please have two hot dudes! PLEASE!
Tom: You know you are a WRESTLING commentator?
Jeannie: Details, details.
*Hard Fi's Living for the Weekend quickly starts up on the Colvintron, as the fans begin to boo rather loudly, the first competitor making his way out from the back first, sporting his trademark cracked pink sunglasses and trenchcoat, as he gives a more confident look than usual, arms folding in front of his chest slowly, as he gives a slight glance back towards the entranceway, as the sounds of Johnny Cash's Gods Going To Cut You Down quickly cuts it off, his Colvin Cup ally and tag team partner quickly making her way out from the back as well, herself clad in a familiar jean vest and "Cowgirl" hat, as she stops at Hereford's side, giving him a quick nod. Jason looks back and returns one of his own, as the two of them immediately make their way down towards the ring, the crowd continuing to pelt them with boos as they head towards the ring, Danny performing a quick war dance skip on her own way down.*
Finkel: Introducing team number one, first, from San Diego California, weighing in at 221 pounds, Jason Hereford! His tag team partner, from Greeley Hill, California, weighing in at 167 pounds, Danny Taylor!
Jeannie: Jason, why oh why did you choose that bitch when I'm right here?!
Tom: First, he can't hear you.
Jeannie: A minor detail.
Tom: Second, he wants to win.
Jeannie: Ouch.
Tom: Regardless it should be interesting to see how this team of self proclaimed victims carry themselves. My guess would be not too well as they are completely on opposite ends of the morality spectrum.
Jeannie: Yeah, Jason has some morals.
Tom: ...Still holding that grudge huh?
Jeannie: Til she's fired. Yep.
*Hereford quickly slides inside the ring, as Danny meanwhile climbs up the nearby ring steps, quickly wiping her feet on the apron, before stepping through the ropes, while Hereford in the meantime springs atop the nearby turnbuckle, now showing off his physique to the "lucky" crowd, who answer with loud boos, the rather arrogant young man giving a bit of an annoyed look in response. Taylor on the other side of the ring quickly removes both her vest and hat, as Hereford heads over himself, quickly slipping out of his own sunglasses and trenchcoat, all of these items being handed off to the referee, who quickly removes them from the ring. Hereford and Danny then back up to their corner of the ring, as they now await their opponents.*
Tom: A more subdued entrance from this team that some might expect, they seem rather focused.
Jeannie: Take off the pants next, baby!
Tom: Sounds like another long night.
*They don't have to wait long as Rashed al Maljed's Mashkalni picks up on the Colvintron first, as the crowd gives a few nice cheers, the man known as Aqil Ghassan quickly striding out from the back, headrobe worn proudly atop his head, as he begins to head down the rampway towards the ring, clapping loudly over his head in rhythm to his entrance theme, some of the crowd joining in with this themselves. He then stops in the middle of the rampway, as Aimee Allen's I'd Start a Revolution quickly picks up next on the Colvintron, as the crowd gives another loud pop, the second member of this tandem, Lily Rose, making her way out from the back next. She walks over to her own Colvin Cup Partner's side, as Hereford and Taylor look on from the ring, neither of them too intimidated by their opponents. Aqil grabs Lily by the arm, now raising it up high with his own, as the crowd cheers, before they quickly step over to each side of the crowd, Lily slapping hands with the left side as Aqil does so for the right.*
Finkel: Introducing their opponents, first, from Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, weighing in at 258 pounds, Aqil Ghassan! His tag team partner, from Los Angeles, California, weighing in at... an undisclosed amount, Lily Rose!
Jeannie: Now I don't care too much for Lily-
Tom: Shocker.
Jeannie: But I can't deny her ability in the ring. Can't say the same thing for her singing talents.
Tom: Jealous, I take it?
Jeannie: I'm warming up to Aqil, yes.
Tom: What?
*As they reach the end of the audience barricade, Aqil and Rose climb onto the ring apron, before the both of them look at each other and nod, the two of them quickly vaulting over the ropes at the same time, landing with ease inside the ring. Aqil then makes his way towards the center of the ring, waving quite proudly out towards the crowd, as Lily joins him, giving everyone a simple pumped fist herself. The two of them then step away and towards their own corners, Aqil removing his headrobe and setting it on the outside carefully, as Danny and Jason simply look at each other, Hereford giving somewhat of an eye roll, as Taylor answers with a scoff of her own. The two teams then begins to talk amongst each other, trying to decide who should start out this bout.*
Tom: And here decides the first major move in this match. You know, they say that a game of chess can be decided simply by the first move-
Jeannie: QUIET! The boys are starting off!
Tom: ...My talking isn't disrupting you from seeing them.
Jeannie: I like to hear them grunting and breathing.
Tom: ...
*Eventually, Ghassan and Hereford decide to kick things off, as the two of them step towards the center of the ring, Aqil now with a much more serious look in his eyes, as Hereford looks back with a rather cocky smirk. Immediately they lunge in to lock up, only for Aqil to immediately take Hereford down with a rather quick arm drag, sending him rolling across the ring! Aqil quickly rises to his feet, as Jason looks a bit surprised, grasping that limb of his slightly, as he simply steps back towards the center of the ring, a much more annoyed expression across his face. He immediately signals for a second lock up, as Ghassan lunges in to answer his request, only for Aqil to quickly drop down with a second one, sending his opponent tumbling along the mat once again! The crowd claps respectfully for Aqil's technical soundness, as he grins and waves to the crowd appreciatively. Hereford rubs on that arm once again, his expression growing even more sour, as he gets to his feet one more time.*
Jeannie: Aqil is really wowing the crowd with this display! And wowing me as well.
Tom: Indeed. It seems that he has completely caught the impoverished Hereford off guard with his ability.
Jeannie: Of course, it's only the beginning and my man will show him up.
Tom: Your man?
Jeannie: Yes he is! ....For now.
*Aqil turns his attention in time to see him approach, as Hereford immediately signals for a third lock up. Aqil quickly lunges in, only for Hereford to catch him in mid move with a quick kick to the stomach, doubling the Arab man over, as he immediately follows with a quick series of forearms, sending Ghassan stumbling back with each one. He eventually backs him off the ropes, sending him off towards the other side, as Hereford then charges forward for a flying crossbody, Aqil however quickly rolls underneath it, as Jason crashes to the canvas, clutching his chest slightly as he lands. He quickly rises to his feet, just in time for Ghassan to bounce off the ropes, then coming back and nailing the smaller man with a clothesline, putting him on his back! Hereford grasps it slightly, as he rises back up, turning around just in time for a second clothesline, taking him off his feet once more!*
Jeannie: Okay, I am really impressed with Aqil! He continues this up, he could be going on to the next round with Miss Rocker chick.
Tom: I have to say, unless the strategy was to wear Aqil down, so far Hereford's and Taylor's chances don't look too bright.
*Hereford almost immediately rolls to the outside, catching his breath, as Danny looks on from inside the ring, a very annoyed look across her own face. Hereford eventually turns around, quickly sliding into the ring, only to stop himself in mid move, exiting the ring once again. The crowd boos quite loudly at this, as Hereford simply paces around towards the other side of the ring, Aqil watching him quite curiously, as Hereford goes to slip inside once more, but once again slipping right back out of the ring, which seems to anger the crowd even more. Once again, Hereford starts to circle the ring, making his way towards the other side, as he heads over towards the apron, motioning to slip back into the ring once again, but yet again stopping himself. The crowd gets even more angry, as Lily has had enough of this, quickly charging forward, then dropping down and nailing Hereford in the side of the head with a low dropkick! Hereford stops in mid move, clutching at his head, as Lily then drops off the apron, quickly shoving Hereford back into the ring, who rises back to his feet, rubbing over his head rather annoyed. He then turns around, as Aqil scoops him up high, then turns around and plants him with a Scoop Slam! Hereford lands hard, grasping at his back once again, as he gets back to his feet once more. Aqil immediately wrenches him by the arm, Jason grimacing slightly, as he leads him over towards the ring apron, tagging in Lily Rose!*
Tom: Looks like Lily won't stand for stalling and wants to give a good showing to the fans. Can't fault her for that.
Jeannie: I CAN fault her for attacking Jason, though!
Tom: He's on the other team against her. That's sorta legal.
Jeannie: Doesn't mean I can like it!
Tom: I think you'll like it less because Lily and Aqil have a double team move in mind!
*Lily makes her way atop the turnbuckle, as Ghassan keeps a tight lock on that wrist, then leaps off with a axe handle smash across that arm! Hereford winces slightly, as he grabs that arm once more. Lily then immediately wrenches that same arm, then takes Hereford into a hammerlock, as she begins to apply pressure, Jason grimacing a bit more, quite surprised by Rose's tight grip. He however quickly frees himself with a swift elbow to the side of the head, Lily letting go almost immediately as she stumbles back a bit. Hereford then quickly grabs and hoists her up high for a suplex, only for Lily to drop down from behind, quickly rolling Jason up into a Rolling Clutch pin! 1....2...*
Tom: Hoo! This match could be over without Danny even making it in the match!
Jeannie: Did you just call me a hoe?!
Tom: This could end the dreams for one team right here!
Jeannie: Answer me!
*Hereford quickly escapes, as he backs up, holding his head in frustration, as he slowly backs up to his corner of the ring. Almost immediately, Danny reaches out make the tag, Hereford looking over a bit confused, as Lily watches on intently, rubbing her head slightly from that elbow shot. Taylor immediately steps into the ring, a much more confident look on her face, as Rose looks back over, quickly stepping forward to meet her. Lily then motions over with her fingers, obviously not intimidated by her opponent. Taylor immediately steps forward, as Rose quickly lunges in and hits a vicious forearm to the face! Danny stumbles back in surprise, as Rose immediately rears back, following with a second one, Danny however quickly ducks out of the way, then fires back with a fist of her own, nailing Lily and sending her stumbling back on contact. She rubs at her jaw slightly, as Danny quickly stomps forward, now unloading with a quick series of these punches, rocking Lily further with each one, before she quickly whips her off the ropes, only for Lily to counter, sending Danny off instead, who seems a bit surprised, Rose immediately charging in and nailing a Yakuza Kick, taking Danny down to the mat as it connects! Lily quickly climbs atop, making a cover! 1.....2....*
Tom: Another cover by Lily!
Jeannie: Did you see the way Taylor's head bounced off her boot and rebounded off the mat? Awesome.
Tom: The random teaming of Lily and Aqil can get it right here!
*Danny kicks out. Lily quickly gets back to her feet, now measuring Taylor as she rises back up, then aiming a high roundhouse at her face! Danny however immediately ducks underneath it, then scooping Lily up high, before powering her down with a vicious Spinebuster! Lily grasps her back in pain, as Danny looks down with a rather satisfied look. She then quickly drops down, making a quick cover. 1.....2.....*
Jeannie: NO!
Tom: The first pin by Danny's team, and this could just be enough! That Spinebuster certainly caught Lily off guard!
*Lily kicks out. Danny simply pulls her up by the neck, now delivering a quick series of clubbing blows across the back, as Rose grimaces slightly from each one, Danny backs up into the corner, as she quickly motions over to Hereford on the outside, who nods in agreement, quickly tagging himself in. Danny keeps Lily held, as Hereford steps into the ring, now aiming a blatant kick to the chest, Rose doubles over from this blow, as Hereford quickly hoists her up in grip with one arm, then driving her down into the mat with a side slam! Lily grasps at her back once more as she hits the mat, Hereford quickly getting to his feet, then stomping down, now digging the back of his boot across Lily's spine, who looks on in pain. He then pulls her back up, then shoving her hard back against the turnbuckle, before charging in himself, driving her back against there with a series of high knees to the stomach, pressing her back further against the turnbuckle with each one. He then reaches back over, tagging back out to Taylor, who quickly enters the ring herself.*
Tom: Looks like Hereford and Taylor have good tactic running, overpowering the smaller Lily and keeping her from her corner. If this were to keep up, I'm not sure how long Rose can last.
Jeannie: I wish Jason would ruff me up like that.
Tom: ...Nice imagine there.
Jeannie: Always here to help.
*Danny scoops Rose up with ease, before setting her up in a tree of woe position. Then a rather pleased sneer, she stomps down right across Lily's face, who winces in pain from each of these, but helpless to do anything about it. Danny then stomps down into that stomach area once again, now pressing that spine of her opponent's further into the turnbuckle, Lily grimacing even further in pain. Danny then reaches down once again, cradling Lily in her arms with ease, only for Lily to start desperately fighting back, punching away at Danny's face, who looks annoyed at this, quickly dropping down with a rib breaker, stopping this assault, before hoisting Lily back up, tossing her overhead with the Last Call! Lily lands hard, grasping further at the spine area, as Danny stomps over and makes a pin. 1.....2......*
Tom: And with Lily down after a vicious throw and thud, that just maybe enough!
Jeannie: Come on, Lily! Kick out for me! I believe in your ability to kick that self important whore's ass!
*Lily manages to get a shoulder up. Danny seems a bit annoyed by this, as she quickly hoists her back off the ground, only to get a quick series of forearms to the face, Danny caught off guard by these, as she stumbles back, clutching at her face a bit more. However as she does so, Hereford tags himself in from behind, quickly charging in from behind, then grabbing Lily by a leg as she tries to make her way back over to Aqil. He then pulls her back with ease, before immediately delivering five quick stomps right across that leg, Lily grimacing slightly from these, as Hereford follows with five more to the other one, before walking over and yanking her back up by the neck. He then quickly hoists her up in his arms, before bringing her back down across his knee with a backbreaker! Lily yelps out in pain, clutching further at that spine of her's, as Hereford immediately pushes her back off. He looks back over towards Danny and flashes a big smirk, reaching back down to hook Lily's arms from behind, then tugging her back to a standing position, immediately her high in a Full Nelson, only for Lily to manage to wrap her legs around Jason's own in mid move, managing to surprise and take him into a quick sunset flip pin! 1.....2...*
Jeannie: Holy Hell! How did she manage that?!
Tom: I doesn't know but should could certainly win this match with that move!
*Hereford quickly escapes, looking absolutely furious at this, as Lily once again starts crawling towards her side of the ring, only for Jason to stop this immediately, dropping an elbow right into her spine, halting this escape instantly, as she once again clutches at her back. Hereford then reaches down, hooking those arms once more, then pulling Lily up with ease, this time successfully pulling off this Full Nelson Slam, driving her into the canvas hard! The crowd begins to boo rather loudly, as Hereford climbs atop, making yet another cover attempt. 1.....2.....*
Tom: This has to be it. I doubt the technical based Lily can take much more of this.
Jeannie: I'm pretty sure your spine isn't suppose to bend the way hers did as she landed.
*Lily once again gets that shoulder up. Hereford looks down in disbelief at this, raking his fingers through his rather messy hair, as he slowly gets back to his feet, only for Danny to once again tag herself back in. She then stomps over, hoisting Lily from off the ground once again, delivering a kick right to the stomach, then pulling her into a rather tight bearhug! Lily's eyes immediately go wide, as she starts to wriggle and squirm desperately, Taylor now compressing her tightly in her arms, as she attempts to break the poor girl into. Aqil looks on from outside the apron in horror at this sight, as Danny wrenches Lily even further in her grip, swinging her about in the air, as she continues to crush her between her arms. Lily's eyes water in pain, as she desperately tries to wriggle out of her opponent's clutches, but to no avail.*
Jeannie: That orge-ess could very easily snap Lily in two if she doesn't get out of this soon.
Tom: She needs to free herself and tag in Aqil. If she doesn't, I don't see her lasting much longer.
*Danny forms a very satisfied smile across her face as she continues to squeeze away, perhaps sensing that the end is near. Lily continues to hold up though, as she fights to free herself. Soon enough Aqil starts clapping from the outside, as the crowd begins to join in, Lily soon finding the strength to fight out of this predicament, as she manages to free her arms, then nail Danny with a desperate ear clap! Taylor gasps in pain, clutching the side of her head, as Lily immediately follows up with a high roundhouse kick, taking Danny down to the mat once more, with Lily falling herself. Immediately the both of them start crawling towards the ring, looking desperate to make the tag, as both Hereford and Ghassan reach out to accept it. Soon enough, both of the girls lunge in and tag out at about the same time!*
Tom: AND NOW COMES IN THE FRESH AQIL!
Jeannie: I hate this cliché!
Tom: And there to meet him is Jason!
*The crowd explodes as Jason Hereford and Aqil Ghassan come running in after one another. Ghassan goes for a running clothesline but Jason ducks, rebounding off the ropes. Aqil goes for the hip toss, but Hereford blocks the move and tries for one himself, only to be blocked by Aqil Ghassan. Aqil delivers a hard elbow to the side of Hereford’s face and is finally able to get the hip toss, the crowd cheering in approval. Aqil goes for another attack but as he reaches, Jason quickly rakes his eyes, causing him to stagger back and cover up his face. Danny, her head turned away at the time, fails to notice and the crowd boos in response but Hereford pays neither them nor an admonishing referee any heed, instead slipping around Aqil from behind and hitting him with a stiff chop block to the ankles. Aqil falls over and Hereford furiously stomps at both of his legs, grabbing the right one and placing a leg bar upon it. Ghassan and recuperates, looking back at Hereford, and uses his size advantage a bit as he rolls forward, forcing Hereford to travel with him as he reaches the ropes. The referee declares a rope break as Jason tries to fight Aqil away from the ropes, but he makes no progress as the ref reaches a “Four.” Danny wags a finger at Jason, as if he were a child roughhousing with another, and immediately does Hereford release the hold, getting back to his feet and stomping at Aqil’s legs again. But Aqil is able to hit a heavy punch to the lower abdomen of Jason Hereford, breaking up his rhythm, and gets up to his feet with a little stagger in his legs. Aqil grabs Jason and hits him with a barrage of knife-edge chops, each one turning Jason’s chest a bloodier tinge. He whips Hereford into the ropes, sending the smaller man rebounding off and into a belly-to-belly suplex. Hereford grips his back and Aqil drops to the mat, applying a front facelock onto Jason.*
Tom: And just like that the momentum has going completely to Aqil! This match is still anyone's victory.
Jeannie: Color me impressed by Aqil. Almost as colored as Hereford's dreamy reddened chest.
Tom: ...Yeah....
*Jason grabs Aqil’s arms but is unable to pull away. He throws a few fists at Ghassan’s arms, but the larger man counterattacks with a few shots of his own, forcing Hereford to remain grounded for a moment. Aqil wrenches at Hereford’s head and Jason bends his legs, pushing his feet into the mat and lifting himself up like a jack to gain leverage to escape. Ghassan goes for a body scissors on Hereford, but Jason spins his body to the side, forcing Ghassan to turn with him. Suddenly, Jason Hereford turns his smaller size to his advantage as he pushes himself off the ground and flips over, forcing the larger Aqil to loosen his grip as Hereford pushes himself out and flops on his back. Jason shakes his head a bit and scrambles to his feet as Aqil rises up, and the two lock up again. Ghassan overpowers Hereford and locks him into a standing armbar, as Hereford rolls forward. Aqil follows with a quick roll of his own, leaving Jason in no better a situation than before. Hereford grabs a hold of Aqil’s freer arm and hops back to execute a monkey flip, but despite being down, Aqil still has the armbar locked in on Jason Hereford. He twists at Hereford’s arm, making the smaller man groan, but Jason hits a well-placed elbow to Aqil’s head, forcing him to release the hold and giving Hereford the opportunity to slip back out.*
Tom: Quite a impressive display of technical ability by Aqil holding on to that Armbar. And Jason as well for trying to escape.
Jeannie: When are we going to get the head spiking?
Tom: Short attention span too huh?
Jeannie: What's that suppose to mean?
*Hereford gets up to his feet and goes for a running knee lift on Ghassan’s head, but instead receives a fireman’s carry that sends him tumbling back to the mat. Ghassan immediately applies a waist lock on the downed Hereford from above. Jason elbows him a few times in the face and tries to get up, but is hit with a belly to back suplex from Aqil. The larger Aqil picks him up, hoisting Hereford up for a German Suplex but Jason wraps his legs around Aqil’s torso, forcing Ghassan to instead give Hereford another belly-to-back suplex as opposed to dropping him on his head. With Hereford a little weaker than before, Aqil Ghassan once again lifts up Jason Hereford and goes for the German Suplex, but this time, Hereford is able to slip out at the apogee of the lift and flips backwards, landing behind Ghassan and quickly hitting a scrambling knee to the small of Aqil’s back, before spinning him around and hitting a leg whip. Ghassan hits the mat and Hereford quickly goes to work, stomping at it again and dragging the Arabian over to his team’s corner. Hereford makes the tag to Danny Taylor, who, while still a bit tired, eagerly enters the ring and hits Aqil with a few clubs to the back. She picks him up as Jason motions over to the turnbuckle, and the pair picks him up in a double suplex position, but instead of simply suplexing him, they slam his knees into the top of the ring post. They pick Ghassan up and do it again, and then finish up with a double suplex that results in Aqil landing flat on his back as Hereford exits the ring.*
Tom: Certainly unique there.
Jeannie: That should be me in there with Jason! But wait... then I would be beating Aqil... Well, as long as I was pinned by one of the two-
Tom: OH KAY THEN! LET'S SEE WHAT DANNY IS GOING TO DO!
*Danny Taylor follows up on the previous maneuver executed by her and her partner, as she grabs Aqil by the leg and locks in a spinning toe hold, keeping Aqil near the corner and not hesitating to break up the move with the occasional stomps to Aqil’s legs. But while Aqil Ghassan seems unwilling to submit to such a hold, his mobility and reversing ability are somewhat hindered by the pain dealt to his legs and Danny is able to first get him up to his feet, hit him with a few punches and, with Ghassan temporarily stunned, is able to quickly lift him and hit him with a Desperada Drop! Hereford is impressed, applauding her effort as the rest of the audience boos, and, feeling a bit rejuvenated, he tags back to her and slips back into the ring as she exits. Jason Hereford wastes no time in going after Aqil’s lower limbs once more. He quickly applies a deathlock to the left leg, and releases the hold as he readies his 10 Stomps of Pain. He hits one to the left, one to the right, one to the left, one to the right, followed by three more to the left and three more to the right. Ghassan clutches his legs as he groans, and Hereford runs off the ropes, rebounding and hitting a knee drop. He quickly makes the cover. 1…..2…..*
Jeannie: And the certificate said death by stomp!
Tom: Not quite what I would say but you have to admit those stomps are like an axe to a tree. Each strike deals massive damage that could bring down his victims.
Jeannie: In other words, it's painful.
*Aqil Ghassan kicks out with no reduction to his usual energy, but he has a hard time getting up as Jason Hereford scrambles back to him with a set of forearms. Stunning Aqil for a moment, he hits him with a butterfly suplex and lays on more stomps, this time focusing more on the right. Hereford picks him up and hits a side backbreaker, and once again scampers over to Aqil’s legs. He applies a leg bar to the one on the left and keeps it locked in, but with the degree of flexibility still possessed by his torso, Aqil leans back and by first using one of Hereford’s arms to pull him towards himself, Ghassan grabs a hold of Jason Hereford’s head and applies a necklock. Overpowering Jason yet again, Aqil forces him to release the leg bar as he flips him over his own shoulder with a modified snapmare. Aqil puts Jason into a side headlock and picks him up slowly, before spinning him around with a hammerlock and then lifting up Jason Hereford from behind with a wrist clutch suplex! Aqil falls back on the mat, once again getting rather fatigued from the way his legs are treating him, and acting on instinct Hereford rolls to the side of the ring and Danny Taylor makes the tag to him, hopping back into the ring. Aqil gets up to his feet and turns to face Danny, who runs at him with a lariat and takes him down, much to the distaste of the fans as well as Lily-Rose.*
Jeannie: Dammit! As much as I hate the broad, I can't deny her ability to clip heads off with her arms.
Tom: And after Jason's attack on Aqil legs, this probably won't help Ghassan either.
Jeannie:I still want her to lose though!
*Danny hauls Aqil back towards her team’s corner, stomping his legs a few times, although not for long. She drops a few elbows and knees on his shins in very quick succession, never hesitating or slowing her pace down. Danny immediately follows up with a single leg crab, bending Ghassan’s weakened left leg over his back and working to keep him away from the ropes. He crawls over and grabs a rope, and as soon as he does so and the referee alerts her, Danny, releases the hold and holds her hands at shoulder level, palms open, as if to indicate her “intention” to stay within the rules of the game. He picks himself up and tries to lock up with her, easily getting her down to her knees, but she slips around him and strikes him in the back with a few forearms before hitting him with a bulldog. Quickly, Danny Taylor goes for the cover on Aqil, placing her forearm over his face. 1…..2…..*
Tom: It looks like all the power of Aqil's has been taken out due to a weakened base!
Jeannie: It doesn't help that the broad has decent sized guns.
Tom: Pound for pound, it's probably true that the two strongest are in the ring currently. But you got to believe if Aqil didn't have his leg weakened that would haven't happened!
Jeannie: And I hate how self righteous she is!
Tom: For obeying the rules?
Jeannie: Yes!
Tom: ...Hey! A cover!
*Once again Aqil kicks out, notably a little weaker than usual, and Danny hauls him back to his feet, before hitting him with a swinging neckbreaker and taking him back down on to his back. She waylays him with a few big forearms and punches to the face, and then grabs his legs, holding one as she puts her knee in the crook of his. She jumps up and drops back down, her knee drilling in behind his. Aqil moans from the pain as Danny picks him back up again and tries to go for another neckbreaker, but the fatiguing Aqil Ghassan manages to push her away. She goes rebounding into the ropes, trying to counterattack with another lariat but Aqil ducks and simultaneously grabs her around her waist, locking in a bearhug and after roughly ten seconds or so, throws her into the air with a brutal, spinning belly-to-belly suplex! Danny lands hard on her back and Ghassan makes the tag back to Lily-Rose who re-enters the ring, wasting no time in going back on the offense against Danny with a few heavy punches of her own. She tries to keep Taylor grounded with a side headlock, but Danny responds with a headlock too, causing both of the women to release the hold and allow them to get on their feet. Danny and Lily exchange forearms, with Rose gaining the advantage as she aims low and knocks Danny over with a double leg takedown. She applies a key lock that pins Taylor down, as Danny clubs away at Lily with the other arm, attempting to force her to break the hold.*
Jeannie: Again things change as Lily is on the attack! Woo! Go Lily!
Tom: One has to wonder if that break on the outside was enough to rest Lily's back. If I were her, I'd have reservations about re-entering.
Jeannie: If she did, Aqil would be flat on his back looking at the lights.
Tom: Point taken.
*Lily and Danny trade blows back and forth, but Danny is able to make it to the ropes, her melee with Lily buying her time to do so. Quickly she stops her barrage of strikes and grabs on, as the fans boo rather loudly. The referee admonishes Lily, instructing her that the count as begun. Immediately she lets go, as Danny slips out. Near to her corner, she makes the tag to Jason Hereford. He enters the ring, a filthy grin on his face as he locks up with her. He hits a knee to the abdomen that sends her in reeling, but before he can follow up, she knees him in retaliation, Hereford gasping for breath after being caught off-guard from such a strike. He instantly lets go and turns to the side instinctively, and she hits him with reverse side-Russian leg sweep, taking him down as she goes for the cover. 1…..2…..*
Jeannie: That was out of nowhere!
Tom: Lily could have this right here!
*Hereford kicks out, and he and Lily get back up to their feet. He forearms her and whips her into the ropes as he puts his head down, going for a back body drop, but she stops herself and kicks him right in the face, making him stagger back a few steps as she grabs him around the waist and hip throws him to the mat. Lily goes for a bit of a leg bar on Hereford, but he coils his leg back and kicks her away, getting back up to his feet and hitting her with a running knee lift. She staggers back as Hereford lifts her up in a suplex position, grabbing her legs around the knees in a fisherman position. Suddenly, Lily manages to wriggle out of Jason Hereford’s grip and lands behind him, and quickly grabs his arms and legs and locks in the Guitar Riff, stretching Hereford’s abdominal muscles and digging into them simultaneously. Hereford refuses to submit, even hitting Lily with a few retaliatory elbows, and so she releases the hold, running back into the ropes and as Hereford turns around, nails him straight in the face with a big Yakuza kick! Hereford wobbles for a moment and topples over, and Lily covers him as soon as he hits the mat. 1…..2…..*
Tom: Oh my! Oh my! Oh my! You have got to believe that's over!
Jeannie: I think I saw hair grease flying into the third row!
Tom: GROSS!
*No! A dazed Jason Hereford gets the shoulder up, and Lily-Rose, still on fire from her offensive barrage, turns him face-down and looks to the audience. They know what she’s signaling for—the Headbanger’s Fall. In the meantime, Danny Taylor, looking to be concerned for her teammate’s chance of winning the match, visibly swings her right arm around and puts it on the top rope, sticks her left foot into the ring and, with both of her opponents looking over at her, dramatically moves her body as if to enter the ring. To allow Lily to finish her move from where she is, Aqil Ghassan preemptively springs into action, entering the ring—but before he can bolt over to the other side of the ring and thwart what looks to be a potential interference from Taylor, is stopped by the referee, who becomes preoccupied with him. Danny meanwhile reverses her “entrance,” almost as if in slo-mo, turns away from the action, and points with her thumb, mocking the action of her opponent. Lily, a bit distracted by all of this, places her right knee on the motionless Hereford’s head and grabs his arms, lifting them up to about waist-level height. But with everyone else distracted, Jason Hereford strikes, bumping his head into Lily’s knee and knocking her off balance, slipping his arms out of her grasp, and hitting her squarely below the belt with a low blow. Lily’s jaw drops as the crowd erupts into boos, Aqil pointing out to the referee the situation. Danny Taylor continues to ignore the cheating effort of her opponent, and the referee finally turns around after getting Aqil out of the ring to see Jason Hereford with Lily-Rose’s head between his legs and her arms in a double underhook. He lifts her up and sends her crashing down head-first onto the mat with the Dead End Driver and goes for the cover. 1…..2…..3!*
Tom: DAMMIT! NOT LIKE THIS!
Jeannie: Well, I hate to see Danny win... But Jason wins too... CONFLICTED!
DING DING DING!
*“Living for the Weekend” picks up on the speakers, the crowd’s booing only becoming louder. Danny Taylor turns around to see Hereford victorious, and acting as if she were shocked by all of what transpired, hurries into the ring to help him up to his feet as the referee raises his arm.*
Finkel: Here are your winners…JASON HEREFORD and DANNY TAYLOR!
*Aqil enters the ring, angered by Jason’s actions, and Danny and Jason quickly exit the ring, backing up the ramp. Hereford, his greasy hair covering most of his face, can be seen grinning along with a most pleased Danny Taylor.*
Jeannie: Yeah! I bet she's happy! Now she gets to go to the back and celebrate with Jas- THAT CHICK IS STEALING MY MAN!
Tom: *ignoring her* Well, unfortunately that's the end for Lily and Aqil, who had such a strong showing in this match. And now the team of Jason Hereford and Danny Taylor will advance to the next level.
*The victorious pair raises their arms at the top of the stage as the crowd continues its cavalcade of boos and insults, and Ghassan helps a dazed Lily-Rose back up to her feet in the ring as the camera fades out.*
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Post by C. M. Synthy on Jan 19, 2009 18:26:08 GMT -5
Announcer: The following is an Intergender Tag match! Coming to the ring first...
TNA's Dale Oliver's composition 'I'm about to Freak' begins to play over the PA system, and ODB bounces out, up to her usual non-feminine antics. She's dressed in fashionable 'garbage lady blue' gear and smacking fist, while drinking from her infamous flask.
Announcer: Weighing in at 130 pounds and standing at 5'6, O! D! B!
Jeannie: Sweet holy hell... that's the ugliest woman I've ever seen!
Tom: Wait. I thought you hated Fannie Package, Rosie, and Danny Taylor?
Jeannie: ... The ugliest woman I've ever seen outside WIG that is.
ODB stands on the ringposts and nods, waiting for her partner and continuously drinking her liquid courage.
Announcer: And her tag team partner, weighing in at 270 pounds and standing in at 5'10, "The War Machine" Rhyyynoo!
This time 'War Machine' rips out from the speakers, and Rhyno charges out, going to join his partner from the Frontline. As soon as he starts posing "Butterfly" begins.
Tom: And here comes ODB's tag team partner, the War Machine Rhyno.
Jeannie: If ya ask me, a rhino is a pretty poor war weapon. Especially when it's up against something like a bomber jet or tank.
Tom: I see...
Jeannie: Rhino's pretty hot though, but I'm not into beastiality.
Tom: ODb and Rhyno here have quite a challenge up against them tonight, as they take on a pairing we haven't seen in quite awhile here in WIG.
Ai, ai, ai, where is my samurai?
17 seconds into the song, Lexi comes out, and dances/bounces to the beat in perfect rhythm. The lights begin to have a strobe flare. As she walks down the ramp, the lights flash numerous colors. Lexi looks absolutely hyped up, adding more steps into her dancing walk then usual. Which is definitely saying -a lot-. She flips into the ring, does a cartwheel, and ends with a perfect Sailor Moon 'Peace' pose. She waves cheerily to ODB, who has her head tilted in a "What the f.." manner. Rhyno barely conceals a bit of a grin.
Announcer: Weighing One hundred and thirty-five pounds, standing at 5'6, Lexiii...DYIO...uh...LEXI D!
Tom: And here comes one of the more energetic members of our roster, Miss Lexi D.
Jeannie: We haven't seen this sugar addict in a long time! Not that I really missed her...
Lexi looks slightly miffed and blows a raspberry at the announcer. "Bitches" by Mindless Self Indulgence begins.
Bitches love me 'cause they know that I can rock! Bitches love me 'cause they know that I can rhyme! Bitches love me 'cause they know that I can fuck! Bitches love me 'cause they know that I'm on time! Throughout the projects!
Tristan comes stalking out, sneer solid on his face even as quite a number of the tougher-looking women in the crowd swoon.
Jeannie: Well, at least there's one bright side to this match! That handsome hunk, Tristan Hades is back once again!
Tom: When I think of Tristan, handsome isn't exactly what comes to mind. Though he's definitely a very impressive competitor in the ring.
Jeannie: Probably in the sack too.
Announcer: And her tag partner, standing in at 6'8, and weighing 300 pounds, Tristan HADES! Tristan checks out ODB, with a raised eyebrow. It would seem his evaluative glance would mean "...At least you look more challening then that fat ass." Tristan and Lexi stare at each other for a second... before Lexi's mouth splits into a giant grin and she points to the corner. Tristan rolls his eyes and steps outside. ODB stays on to face Lexi. She bounces from foot to foot, hair poofing into the air, and down, into the air, and down..and then even further when ODB slams into her. Lexi goes flying and ODB jumps her.Lexi's head gets slammed, and ODB stands up with her in her arms, takes off, and hits a running powerslam. Lexi flops against the ground. ODB hits a double stomp and goes to work. She goes to kick Lexi in the side, but Lexi wriggles out of the way and sweeps the back of ODB's leg. Lexi retaliates to ODB's earlier moves by landing a nice cartwheel stomp to ODB's center. She raises an arm in cheer, leaps off, takes a running start and - enziguiri kicks Rhyno from off the edge.
Tom: A bit of trouble early on, but so far it looks like Lexi hasn't lost a step in the ring despite her recent absence !
Jeannie: Did she really have to attack the guy who wasn't even in the ring?
Tom: Lexi's a bit wild in her offense, you can never expect what she'll do next.
He'd been making an attempt at distracting her via yelling. She waves at him as she stands back up, only to be shoved into a turnbuckle by ODB. The rougher woman successfully hits her Dirty Dozen! Lexi stumbles as ODB climbs up and jumps for a Lou Thesz Press, which lands, but Lexi rolls it over into a pin!
1
2- ODB kicks out.Lexi frowns, and stretches for a second as ODB gets up. The two square off. ODB lifts Lexi onto her shoulder, but Lexi reverses into a tornado DDT! She races over to the ropes to attempt a Lionsault… and ODB rolls out of the way and manages to tag Rhyno!
Tom: A close call there, but ODB seems to have scouted Lexi there, as she quickly makes the tag out.
Jeannie: Pretty smart move for a dumb broad like here. The so called war machine should have more luck with this rainbow haired little freak.
Lexi grins a thumbs-up to her brother, who has an agitated look on his face. Rhyno looks at her, a look of obvious disbelief apparent. Lexi steps backward, runs in place, hits the ropes behind her and flings herself toward the War Machine!
....Only to bounce off and smack down butt first to the mat.
Jeannie: ... Not the brightest tactic there.
Tom: Hey, gotta give her credit for trying.
Jeannie: I'll give her credit if she actually pulls it off Bailey.
Tristan smacks his forehead from shame, and simply holds out a paw. Lexi's head hangs down as she smacks it. Tristan steps over the ropes, and immediately looks down and snickers at the short and stout form of Rhyno, who races toward Tristan. Tristan dodges, and Lexi barely manages to leap out of the way. Rhyno stops short of pummeling into her, and Tristan takes advantage of his confusion by wrapping a massive forearm around his neck and bringing him down via Russian legsweep. Tristan rolls backward, impressive for a man of his mass, and lifts Rhyno onto his shoulders into a Torture rack. Rhyno shouts and struggles. He rolls him off into a side slam back breaker. Tristan elbows him in the chest twice, before rolling onto him and slamming his head into the mat. Tristan drags him to his feet before back up and knocking him with a punt far more devastating the Randy Orton could ever hope to do. Tristan turns and looks at ODB, eyebrow raised again. ODB thunks her chest and gives him a Bring It! Look. Tristan tilts his head, ponders, then drags Rhyno’s ass over to ODB. She tags in and proceeds to stare down Tristan. He backs up a few feet, as she takes a loud gulp from her flask, and crosses his arms. She thumps her chest again, and holds out her hands to lock up. Tom: This may not end well either...
Jeannie: Says you! Personally, I can't wait to see Tristan rip this skank's head off!
Tristan seems ready to- then blatantly throws his hand backward and tags Lexi in. Lexi looks confused, and steps into the ring as Tristan shrugs. Miss D looks to ODB, who blinks a few times, mumbles something jumbled, and takes another swig. Lexi’s face suddenly lights up.
Jeannie: Awww...
ODB offers her the flask. Lexi pauses, before bringing up a single digit finger. She bends over and begins to paw through a huge pocket on her voluminous pajama bottoms. A squeal of joy and she faces back to ODB. She holds her hand in front of ODB’s face….revealing… an acidic green glowstick.
ODB’s blank face says it all.
Lexi holds her finger up again. She brings the glow stick close to her face and tugs off the top of it. She taps it against ODB’s drink and… downs it. She wavers for a moment.
Even Tristan has wide eyes, and again, that’s saying –a lot-.
Jeannie: What the hell is this loony doing now?! This is not the time for her to wig out!
Tom: I... well, I honestly have no idea what's going on here.
Suddenly her eyes open completely open, and her wide grin invokes the image of past Dionysian festivities. She tosses the empty radioactive canister behind her, and runs at ODB, she grabs her by the wrist and shoves her against the ropes, ODB, taken aback by the sudden change of pace, looks dizzy. Lexi snickers slightly, and quickly wraps ODB into her Freezer Burn move! (A rope-hung Dragon sleeper.)
Lexi: Nya, Nya, Nyaaa!
Rhyno seems to have regained his bearings, as he sees his partner tied up and tags her before the match ends.
The referee starts giving a count to Lexi. 1
2
3
4 Lexi unwraps herself at 5. She sticks her tongue out at Rhyno, which is now bright green. Rhyno responds by stepping up to her and landing a spinebuster.
1
2
-Lexi gets a shoulder up. @_@
Tom: A nasty move there by Rhyno. Luckily Lexi manages to stay in it somehow.
Jeannie: I'm still wondering what the hell was in that... that GLOWSTICK!
Rhyno throws her over his shoulders – only to get speared by Tristan! Lexi sits up again, glancing around, and glaring at Tristan when she sees him standing over Rhyno. Lexi pops up, mindful of ODB watching. She goes to Tristan and pokes him hard in a kidney. He turns, and Lexi just points to their corner. He looks at her, kicks Rhyno again, and saunters off back to the sidelines.
She looks at Rhyno, does a quick cartwheel moonsault and goes for a pin.
1
2
Tom: Lexi perhaps wants to pin Rhyno herself! That would indeed be a rather impressive feat!
Jeannie: More like an impossible one if you ask me.
ODB breaks up the pin with an elbow drop, the ref quickly gets her back to her own post. Rhyno stands and clotheslines Lexi down. This time, he goes for a pin. 1
2
Lexi pops up, and hits a kick to the back of Rhyno’s head. Lexi quickly scrambles to the top of a rope- only to get shoved down hard by a devious-feeling ODB! Immediately after, a quick-acting Tristan runs into the ring and spears ODB off of the apron!
Tom: Tristan leveling ODB with that spear! I do believe she may have been taken out of this match!
Jeannie: YEAH! TAKE THAT, YOU UGLY LITTLE SKANK!
Rhyno grabs Lexi’s leg and goes for a leg hook pin on the vulnerable girl.
1!
2! 3- no! Lexi flips out of the attempt, stares down Rhyno, and …winds up sliding through his legs and yanking them out from beneath him. She quickly twists him into an unorthodox, almost illogical pin 1
2
3!!
Lexi’s barely scraped by for this one. Announcer: And the winner of the match is the team of Lexi D, and Tristan HADES!
Tom: And Lexi gets the win with a huge upset! Now then, you were saying Jeannie?
Jeannie: Eh, total fluke. It'd never happen again in a million... wait, what's going on now?
Lexi scrambles to the edge of the ring with a worried look, going to see how ODB and Tristan are up to, only to get shocked as ODB suddenly plants a manly kiss on an equally shocked looking Tristan. Lexi and Tristan both twitch as ODB lets out a triumphant “HA!”
Jeannie: EWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!
and the camera cuts to commercial.
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The Innocent
Opener
Rosie: First Ever WIG Women's Champion
Posts: 88
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Post by The Innocent on Jan 20, 2009 19:10:04 GMT -5
Finkel: The following contest is a champion versus champion match, scheduled for one fall!
Tom: This next match should be a brutal affair. Two of the toughest women in wrestling today, facing off against each other.
Jeannie: And we use the term "women" here loosely.
The familiar sound of Awesome Kong's theme begins to start up first on the Colvintron, as the crowd gives a rather mixed reaction, though obviously a mainly negative one, as the current TNA Knockout's Champion stomps out from the back, a rather anger sneer across her face, with handler Raisha Saeed in tow. She stomps down the ramp way, title slung over her shoulder, looking quite eager to destroy her next victim.
Finkel: Introducing first, accompanied to the ring by Raisha Saeed, from Japan, weighing in at 272 pounds, she is the current TNA Knockouts Champion, Awesome Kong!
Tom: Here's comes our first competitor, direct from Total Nonstop Action Wrestling, the behemoth that is Awesome Kong.
Jeannie: What's Aqil's mom doing here?!
Tom: WOW... that's Raisha Saeed Jeannie.
Jeannie: And why is she accompanying this monstrous she beast?
Tom: You'd have to ask TNA about that.
Awesome Kong quickly climbs into the ring, stepping up onto the ring apron and quickly climbing inside the ring, now stepping towards the center of the ring, grabbing that belt laid across her shoulder and hoisting it up high above her head, the crowd giving another mixed reaction, as she then hands it to Raisha on the outside, who takes hold of it and simply nods, making her way now over to Kong's corner, as the two of them await their opponent.
They don't have to wait long, as Metallica's Saint Anger picks up next on the Colvintron, the crowd now booing especially loudly, as the current WIG Women's Champion stomps out from the back herself, a nasty scowl across her own face, belt strapped casually around her neck, as she begins to make her own way down towards the ring, not looking too intimidated from her opponent tonight. Though perhaps she just hasn't seen her yet.
Finkel: Introducing her opponent, representing the Innocent, from The Land of Purity, weighing in at 200 pounds, she is the current WIG Women's Champion, Rosie!
Rosie quickly slides inside of the ring, quickly getting back to her feet and stepping into the center of the ring, quickly grabbing that belt around her neck by the strap and holding it up with one arm, a huge scowl across her unpleasant face, as she quickly lowers it, then shoves it right into the referee's grasp, nearly knocking him down with the force. He wisely exits the ring rather quickly, setting it on the outside, before returning to the ring, as Awesome Kong looks back across the ring at her opponent, a rather sick smile across her own face. Rosie simply glances back herself, pounding a fist into her palm, as she licks her lips a bit.
Tom: Rosie here has been WIG Women's Champion for quite a few months now. Though she's come close to losing that belt a few times during her reign.
Jeannie: Really, I'd be happy if anybody else taking it from that... that thing. She makes Fannie Package look masculine.
Tom: Now there's an accomplishment. Nonetheless, she is very dangerous in the ring and she's here to prove it tonight.
The two of them quickly step into the middle of the ring, as the bells sounds to signal the beginning of this match! Almost immediately, Rosie rears back and levels her opponent with a nasty headbutt! Kong stumbles back slightly, as Rosie immediately follows up with a series of stiff fists to the face, slowly causing her equally monstrous opponent to stumble back from the force. She eventually backs Kong into the ropes, then charges in, only to get a quick headbutt herself, sending her stumbling back with ease, grasping at her own cranium. Kong stomps closer, grabbing Rosie and delivering a second one, knocking her back further, followed by a third, this one nearly taking Rosie off her feet! She looks on in annoyance, as Kong immediately scoops her up with ease, only for Rosie to quickly reach out and rake her across the eyes! Kong immediately lets go, grabbing at those sockets of her in reaction, as Rosie once again starts to unload with a swift series of punches, battering her opponent further, then quickly whipping her off towards the ropes, bouncing off herself and charging in to deliver a big boot, nailing Kong right in the face and sending her staggering back once again, this time against the ropes. Rosie then charges in once more, delivering a brutal clothesline, sending Kong sailing to the outside, though still landing on her feet. The crowd boos as Rosie steps away and flashes a huge sneer, putting her hands on her hips as she gazes at a dazed Kong on the outside. The Awesome one is not amused, as she slightly rubs her face, before quickly returning to the ring. Rosie simply watches on and bends down, motioning with both hands for her to bring it on, a huge smirk on her face. Kong indeed does so, as she steps forward, then rearing back and leveling Rosie with a fist of her own, sending the WIG Women's Champion stumbling back with ease. She grimaces slightly, as Kong follows in pursuit, grabbing her by the head and letting loose with another headbutt, once again nearly knocking Rosie off her feet. She then quickly spins around, now unleashing a spinning backfist, Rosie however ducking underneath it, then launching a rolling elbow in reply! Kong nearly topples over from the force, as she grasps her face in pain, Rosie bouncing off the ropes once again, then coming back with a brutal lariat, Kong finally going down to the mat! Rosie bends down and sneers, as she makes a cover. 1.....2..
Tom: And Rosie finally brings down the mammoth Awesome Kong!
Jeannie: DAMN!
Tom: Could things end this quickly?!
Kong powers out, sending Rosie off her form with relative ease. The Innocent member seems a bit surprised by this, but quickly shakes off the feeling, as Kong gets back to her feet quite quickly. Rosie stomps forward once more, quickly delivering a vicious series of clubs across the neck before she can recover completely, Kong hunching over slightly, as she grasps at her neck, Rosie then swinging behind and locking in a hammerlock, before turning it a hammerlock shoulder jawbreaker, jacking Kong back and her stumbling once again. Rosie then starts to unload with even more ruthless fists, eventually backing Kong off into the corner, as she continues to pound away even more. Kong however manages to catch one of these, then turn things around, now forcing Rosie back into the turnbuckle instead! Kong then follows with a vicious series of fists from her own hands, Rosie grimacing with each one, as she quickly guards her face in retaliation. Kong then grabs her by the arm, yanking her forward into a nasty short arm lariat to the face, sending her opponent down in a heap. Kong quickly looks for a cover. 1.....2...
Tom: And just like in TNA, Kong has quickly asserted herself in the ring. When you're as good as she is though, it's not too hard.
Jeannie: I'm conflicted, do I root for the hulking she best from TNA or the one on our side?
Tom: Why would you even consider favoring the competition?!
Jeannie: But she's not as ugly!
Rosie manages to kick out this time, almost sending Kong sailing off! She looks a bit surprised herself, as Rosie quickly pushes back to her feet, wiping a fist across her mouth, then simply unleashing another series of punches to Kong's face, who responds in kind with a few of her own, the two of them now trading shots with one another, showing no end in sight to their combined fury. Both of them seem to show little effect from each of these, but continue to unleash them nonetheless. Eventually Rosie catches Kong off guard with another one, then attempts to scoop her up, only for Kong to counter this time with another headbutt to the face. Kong quickly drops back to her feet, as Rosie grasps her head slightly. She then presses Rosie high above her head, the WIG Women's Champion looking on in shock, then slamming her back down to the mat with a press slam! Rosie lands hard on her back, grasping slightly at it now, as Kong quickly reaching down, then yanking her up with one arm, before dropping down across a knee for a backbreaker! Rosie grimaces once more, clutching at back, as Kong quickly shoves her off, now dropping down for another pin. 1.....2...
Tom: Kong has targeted the back of Rosie it seems. A good tactic, as it might make things harder for Rosie to use her own strength.
Jeannie: Even someone like Chick Aura or Fannie Package couldn't lift up that load!
Tom: Now I wouldn't go that far Jeannie...
Rosie once again kicks out. Kong looks on in annoyance, quickly yanking her opponent back up, before following with a quick series of clubs across the back, Rosie hunching over further from each one, as she looks on in anger, Kong then quickly whipping Rosie off the ropes, then catching as she comes back with a rather powerful spinebuster! Rosie goes down into the mat, clutching further at her back, as Kong stomps back over, quickly reaching down, only to get a quick thumb to the eye! She stumbles back once more, rubbing at her face, as Rosie quickly gets to her feet, grabbing Kong around by the neck, then dropping down to the mat, managing to take the stunned Kong down to the canvas, applying a rather firm grounded headlock. She then reaches over and clasps her hands, turning the move into a crossface, as she begins to wrench back heavily across Kong's face! The TNA Knockout's Champion grimaces in anger, as she starts to feel the effects of this hold, quickly trying to fight her way out of it. Rosie however keeps a tight clasp around that face of her's, as she digs her hands into the skin of her opponent as she applies the holds, increasing the pain. Kong continues to fight back though, enduring the hold, before getting back to her feet, taking Rosie into the air with air and taking her down with a Backdrop Suplex! Rosie lands hard, clutching at her spine once again, as Kong checks her face for blood, then makes her way over, covering Rosie once more. 1......2....
Tom: Rosie tried her usual stretching tactics, but Kong is just too damn strong!
Jeannie: You're telling me!
Tom: Could this be it?!
Rosie once again manages to kick out, showing her toughness. Kong looks furious at this, as she quickly yanks Rosie back to her feet, then hoists her up over her shoulders, quickly taking the WIG Women's Champion into an Accordion Rack! Rosie's eyes water in pain, as she forms an angry scowl across her own face, Kong continuing to try and snap the spine of her opponent, as Rosie wriggles in desperation, trying to fight out of this very painful submission hold. The referee quickly makes his way over, making sure to check if Rosie wants to quit or not. Rosie responds by spitting angrily in his face, causing him to quickly back away. She then rears forward and brings her head back, driving it against the back of Kong's own. She staggers slightly, as Rosie delivers a quick series of more of these, the Awesome one soon being brought down to her knees. Rosie manages to free herself, rubbing that back in pain, before quickly charging forward off the ropes, driving her boot right into Kong's face quite viciously! Rosie quickly looks for the cover. 1.....2....
Tom: Rosie finally manages to build some offense against her opponent. The question is, will it be enough to keep Kong down?
Kong manages to kick out once more. She starts rising to her feet once again, as Rosie quickly swings behind her, grasping that back slightly as she does, then immediately stomping viciously across the back of Kong's neck, who continues to push back up. Rosie then quickly drops down and drives both of her feet into the back of Kong's knees, pressing her own against Kong's back, as she sits down on the canvas. She then reaches forward, quickly locking her hands back around Kong's neck, now quickly applying a Cross Knee Chinlock. Kong's eyes widen in anger, as she feels more pressure being applied to her by this equally vicious woman, as she once again begins to try and struggle free. Rosie however is relentless, as she wrenches back on that chin, seemingly prying to pry the Awesome one's head clean off! Kong however begins to rise to her feet once again, reaching back with her arms and hoisting the seated Rosie onto her back. She then walks forward, before falling back and flattening her beneath! Rosie gasps in pain, as her back gets driven into the canvas once more. Kong then drops down, making another pin attempt. 1.....2.....
Tom: A nice attempt from Rosie to wear that monster down, but again, Kong overpowers her. This could be the deciding move!
Jeannie: Ah screw it, kill her you ugly warped freak!
Rosie gets the shoulder up this time. Kong simply sneers now, as she rises to her feet once more, now quickly starting to ascend the nearby top rope. The crowd looks on, now cheering quite loudly for this, perhaps excited to see her make a rare trip to the turnbuckles. Rosie rolls along the mat, still rubbing at her back, as Kong manages to position herself atop there, then immediately leaps off, going for a top rope body splash, better known as the Awesome Press! Rosie however manages to roll away at the last second, as Kong lands into the canvas, gasping in pain, as she clutches her chest, now kneeling. Rosie slowly gets to her feet, eyes full of anger, as she immediately pulls up the stunned Kong, then hoists her atop her own shoulders, the crowd gasping in shock, as she holds her up in a fireman's carry position, before throwing her off and following up with a DDT! Kong bounces hard off the mat, now grasping her neck in pain. Rosie pants slightly, grasping her back in anger, as she immediately follows up, grabbing Kong from behind and immediately pulling her into the Fury Grasp, now pulling back as hard as she can across her opponent's neck. Kong's eyes bug out in horror, as she starts thrashing angrily once more to try and escape. This time though, Rosie makes sure she can't raining down a series of relentless fists to the face as she applies the hold, knocking Kong for a loop. She continues to pull back hard, as eventually Kong can't take anymore, going under as the move takes effect. The referee quickly moves over, hoisting her arm up to make sure, before finally determining that she's out.
The bell sounds once more, as this one is done with.
Finkel: Here is your winner.... the WIG Women's Champion, Rosie!
Tom: Rosie has done it! She's brought down the monstrous Awesome Kong and won one here tonight for WIG!
Jeannie: Definitely gotta give the Kong credit too though. She put up a hell of a strong effort.
Tom: Like her or not, Rosie is arguably the toughest roster member in all of WIG. The question is, who in the locker room will step out to challenge her at WIG's New Genesis?
Jeannie: Who knows? Could be the two masked skanks again.
Metallica's St Anger hits the Colvintron once more, as Rosie quickly rolls out of the ring, rubbing her back in pain. She looks back with hatred inside the ring, definitely not happy about almost losing that encounter. Raisha meanwhile slips inside the ring, followed out soon after by the likes of Rhaka and Sojourner Bolt, who all pour into the ring quite quickly, checking on the status of Awesome Kong. The crowd simply boos, as Rosie makes her way over to the outside, snatching up her belt once more, draping it around her neck, then quickly heading away from ringside, clutching her back at further as she does. She finally makes her way to the backstage once more, as we cut to the ring one more time, showing Awesome Kong still laying there inside the ring, having been brought down by WIG's own Rosie.
We quickly cut to commercial.
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Post by C. M. Synthy on Jan 25, 2009 18:50:02 GMT -5
*Back from commercial. It would seem The W*I*G camera has taken the audience to lightly-lit gym/locker room. The first thing the audience notices is shirtless, well-built Tristan, doing bench presses as easily as tossing Grizzly Redwood around. His hair stays immaculately mohawked. His amethyst eyes catch sight of the camera, and he pauses in his reps to flip off the camera, and sharply pointing to the left. The camera smoothly drifts away from him, where a rather odd sight meets the eyes of whoever happens to be watching.
The Olympus Sisters are both upside down, on a pair of pull up bars. Synthy is doing curl-ups at an impressive rate, dressed in a gray midriff-tank top, with what looks suspiciously like a Chris Hero symbol on the front in yellow and red, and black and red track pants. Synthy's fuchsia hair is spiky-looking due to the gravity.
Lexi has one leg thrown over the pull-up bar and seems to be doing an odd splits-like stretch. She's donned a hot pink tank with MMM! CANDY! written in Skittle-colored lettering. She's also wearing massive lime green cargo pants with hot pink lining. Her two-toned hair's bouncing as per usual.
Synthy: 99, 100, 101, 102, 103, 104, 105...Lexi, 107, 108, what are you doing? 112, 113...
Lexi: Being flexible. =)
Synthy: I can see that, 129, 130, but why aren’t you doing your usual Dance Dance Revolution Intense training? 140, 141…
Lexi: Well, one night those stupid tornados that Jeffy always sees every four seconds popped up in my room and ate them. Next thing I knew, they were burning into Dance Dance cinders. T_T But, then they started glittering and I didn’t feel so bad, but I need new mats.
Synthy: You drank another glow stick. *This is not phrased as a question, and Synthy pauses mid-position, looking like a crazed L.* 165, 166…
"..Pink tornadoes..."
A voice is heard off camera which soon drifts along into the locker room, Molly Ringworm. She stares off into space with wide eyes, as if she isn't aware of the presence of anyone around her.
"..The Disclosure Project should really be alerted of things like this.."
Popping a locker open she bends over and retrieves a book with the title "PSI Ability Under Human Potential". Studying the cover with a far off look, she heads back in the direction she had came.
"..When they eat they make this "La la la laaaaa..~" kind of sound..like a beautiful soliloquy. or maybe it was more like a power drill. I get them mixed up.."[/i]
Lexi: What’s a sol li gay? A Raftshack half?
Synthy:… I officially give up on humanity. And I lost count. Frickin’ –A-….
She manages to shake her head and roll her eyes, even in such in odd upside down position. She gives her sister a long glance. Lexi sees, smiles, and waves, going back to her twirly splits move on the curl-up pole. Synthy shoots a long, stern look to Tristan, who was admiring the backside of one Molly Ringworm as she walked away. Suddenly, Lexi starts swinging back and form, and slithers to the ground. She brushes herself off and does a headstand.
Lexi: OH! I REMEMBERED SOMETHING!!
Synthy: To drink your milk and take your vitamins? *dryly*
Lexi: I like the Flintstone kind. They taste like rainbow rocks. But um…no. We gotta match together!
Synthy: *Regards her sister carefully* Oh really now?
Lexi: Well, um, not really! *Synthy sighs* We’re the prize!
Synthy: …. Ex-cusi?
*Here, Tristan stops his own work out, and slowly sits up. His contemplative look is suddenly full of menace, reflecting Synthy’s emotion behind her eyes.*
Lexi: Tristan’s in the match up though! It’s against those Louvre Lovely guys! =D They looked sad and wanted a pretty neat stipulation… they win, they get us for a date. Isn’t that a yummy fruit? How do they get us into dates? They’re small aren…t…they… uh…sissy? Why are you looking at me like that?
Synthy:…You insane little girl… *Synthy kickflips off of the bar, and lands in front of Lexi. Lexi yelps for a moment… before cartwheeling away into a running position. She flies off, with Synthy chasing after her.*
Tristan: *Tristan’s look is one of malicious intent. He begins to laugh, and one can only imagine what must be happening to the Latin Lovers in his mind.*
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