W*I*G: Glory and Misery

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

*The camera fades in on a video package, chronicling past matches of W*I*G and their endings; some by pinfall, some by submission, alternating between scenes of victory and scenes of defeat. After a brief two minutes of this, text reading "GLORY AND MISERY" fades over the video, before it finally fades out to the W*I*G-Sphere, a red-hot crowd clearly excited for the event that is to follow.*

Tom Bailey: Hello everyone and welcome to Glory and Misery! We have a capacity crowd here tonight and the tens of thousands of fans in attendance all have those two main words on their minds. I'm Tom Bailey--

Jeannie Lawless: ...And I am, of course, Jeannie Lawless. Not that my text doesn't say that...

Tom: What?

Jeannie: Nevermind.

Tom: Anyway, we've got some great matches lined up here tonight. In that very ring out there, we'll see a Gauntlet Battle Royal to determine the #1 Contender for the Blazing Path title--which will be defended against the winner of that match later on in the evening. We also have a match between Maeve O'Hare and Molly Ringworm that will determine the #1 Contender for the UNDISPUTED W*I*G Women's Championship. Also, we've got a career vs title match for the W*I*G World Tag Team Championship between Team Raft Shack and the Highland Diamonds who have made respective bets.

Jeannie: No matter who wins that one, something big is guaranteed to happen afterwards.

Tom: Right you are! And also, ladies and gentlemen, our returning World Heavyweight Champion Synthy Eris will make her first title defense against a mystery opponent. All that and much, MUCH more here tonight...on Glory and Misery!

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

*The day of the W*I*G PPV Glory and Misery has finally come, and so has the debut of Cee Jones. The very man is backstage with his girlfriend and retainer, Katya Magnussen, and is clad in his new battle gear--a red and black vertically-striped wrestling singlet and black boots. His hair is freshly slicked back and his moustache is waxed into a genial curve. Cee, for the first time in ages, seems genuinely happy to be here.*

Katya: You ready to do this, Cee?
Cee: I think so, yeah. Let's go down the checklist again, just to be sure.

*Just then, a convenient stage hand sidles up to our blonde bombshells, clipboard in hand.*

Hand: Jones?
Cee: That's me.
Katya: Okay, one last time. New look?
Cee: *gesturing to himself* Check.
Katya: New gimmick?
Cee: Check.
Katya: New hair?
Cee: All natural, and check.
Katya: New voice?
Cee: *In an overblown carnie warble.* You've got it right ON the money, missy!
Katya: *giggles* Cute.
Hand: Name?
Cee: I--wait...awww, I KNEW something was missing!
Katya: Oops. A name is kinda important to have...
Cee: YA THINK?! Cripes, now my big re-debut is ruined! ARGH, think think think!

*At just this time, the ring legend known as Archibald Barnes happens upon the scene. He has a faraway look in his eyes as he comes closer to the group, specifically Cee. Finally, Cee takes notice of the man in the middle of his desperate meltdown.*

Cee: *straightening himself up* Erm...can I help you, sir?
Barnes: You remind me of someone, young man...that face, that moustache, the build...you remind me of a man from my youth!
Cee: Oh! Well, that's kinda what I was going for with this...
Katya: Clearly, you've pulled it off.
Barnes: Yes, I remember now! You look just like Tornado Montgomery, the great wrestling champion of the Yukon! He was a big draw back in the olden days, when I was but a rookie wrestler myself!
Cee: Is that a good thing?
Barnes: Barnes: Heck no! Tornado Montgomery was the lowest-down, diriest, cheating-est snake that ever did, and boot up laces...or is that laced up boots...? Anyway, we had a legendary feud when I was a youngin'! We wrestled across the Great White North, we wrestled in every state fairground in the Union--why, we had one match that lasted three days and four nights in Pawtucket--and that dirty cheat won with an eye rake and a roll-up! But I got the best of him, let me tell you...took another week and I got my rematch and bested him in a Greenland Scramble Death Match Spectacular! Took me four Whirling Twirlixers to put him away! That was the last I'd seen of him when I pinned him one, one, three! We didn't use "two" back then because of the War and all, and I almost got drafted when I accidentally said it in a game of bridge before one of my matches! Couldn't stand it myself, not my forte, but that's what you did with the guys back then if they ever called you out and asked for a game. Had to do it, gon' do it, would do it again, even though I hated it. Almost as I hate those...what'chem'call'its...

*Barnes continues to mutter incoherently about rock and roll hippies and butterscotch. The other three beat a hasty retreat as he turns away.*

Cee: Hmmmm...
Katya: Penny for your thoughts?
Cee: Tornado Jones. It has a ring to it, no?
Katya: *thinking hard* That sounds really good, actually.
Hand: That what you're going with?
Cee: *The old carnie voice comes out again.* The name's Tornado Jones, chappy, and don't wear it out, okay?

*With this, Crippler Jones is fully reborn into Tornado Jones--and just in time, too, as his big debut is upon us all! What will become of this blonde blast from the past? Stay tuned, W*I*G fans!*

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

We cut to the ring as the bells sounds, the opening bout about to get underway. Traditional W*I*G* announcer Howard Finkel is already in the ring, ready to explain the rules.

Finkel: The following contest is a Fifteen Man Over The Top Gauntlet. Now here are the rules. The match will begin with two participants that we have randomly selected. With every minute, a new participant will enter the ring. Participants can only be eliminated by being thrown over the top rope at this time. Once there are only two participants left, the match can only be won by pin or submission. The winner will earn a Blazing Championship title shot later tonight! Now then, introducing the first participants!

The crowd looks on eagerly towards the entrance ramp, curious to see who has the lucky distinction of entering first. They don't have to wait long as the Magnum P I theme kicks in on the Colvintron, the crowd cheering loudly in response. The first entrant quickly runs out from the back, looking absolutely pumped for this contest! Clad in his traditional Detroit Tiger's baseball cap, sunglasses, and Hawaiian shirt as well as a set of orange trunks, black kneepads, and matching boots, the young man quickly heads down to the ring, slapping hands with the fans on his way.

Finkel: Introducing the man who drew number one, from Honolulu, Hawaii by way of Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at 245 pounds, James "Magnum" Constance!

Constance hops up onto the ring apron and quickly climbs inside. He then takes off his glasses, hat, and shirt, bundling them all together neatly and handing them off to a referee, who exits the ring to put them aside. He then begins stretching a bit, bouncing back and forth in place a little as he waits patiently for his opponent. Finkel meanwhile nods and raises the microphone once again.

Finkel: And introducing the man who drew number two...

The lights are out in the W*I*G-Sphere as a familiar guitar riff is heard.

"I don't wanna be, I don't wanna be me.
I don't wanna be me... anymo-ore."

The crowd are already booing for the arrival of the first ever W*I*G World Heavyweight Champion. His crusade to "clean up" wrestling has left them unimpressed. He walks out, as always in his completely black attire.

Finkel: From Queens, New York, weighing in at 234lbs... COL~TRANE!

Jeannie: Hooray, he's back.

Tom: This man has been a wreck since Synthy Eris beat him for the W*I*G World Heavyweight Championship some months ago. He hasn't beeen on form at all. Maybe with a win tonight, Coltrane can help to get back on the path to the title again.

Coltrane simply marches straight on down to the ring. He has no desire to look towards any of the fans, nor have they any desire to interact with him. He slides into the ring, discards his trenchcoat & glares suspiciously at Constance in the ring, who simply looks back in his direction, the two of them quickly meeting eyes.Almost immediately the bell sounds once again and the two men rush right up to one another, more then eager to get things started. Constance starts things off with a stiff elbow smash to the face, Coltrane reeling back a bit, only to fire right back with one of his own! Constance staggers a little himself, only to unleash a second one in retaliation, connecting once again. Coltrane rubs his jaw slightly, then returns the favor with a second shot of his own. Soon enough, the two of them begin exchanging these blows back and forth quite quickly, the crowd watching on the outside in awe as Finkel swiftly exits to the outside. Coltrane soon ducks beneath one of Constance's shots and grabs him by the neck, charging over and trying to toss him over the ropes quickly! Constance however blocks it with a foot, then fires back with a back elbow to the jaw! The mysterious Coltrane stumbles back and grabs at his mouth once more. James then hoists him up with ease in a scoop slam, trying to toss him early as well! Coltrane however instinctively snatches the top rope, preventing this early elimination. He then begins firing back with a series of fists atop of Constance's noggin, the native Hawaiian lowering him quickly to the ground. Coltrane then counters immediately by hoisting Constance himself, now looking to dump him to the outside as well! Constance however manages to fight free, landing behind his opponent and grabbing him by the waist, launching him quickly overhead with a German Suplex! Coltrane goes sailing overhead, landing hard on the mat and grasping at his neck slightly, as Constance turns around, now eying the clock present on the Colvintron. 5.....4.....3.....2.....1

Tom: It’s time for our third entrant! Who’ll it be?

Jeannie: There’s a lot of possibilities…

BUZZ!

"The Dillinger Escape Plan's Black Bubblegum quickly picks up on the Colvintron, as the crowd and Constance both eye the ramp way with curiosity. Soon enough, the newcomer, "The Dream Seller" Travis Shade emerges from the back, sporting a very confident look on his face as he looks back towards the ring. He is clad in a rather set of oddly patterned tights along with traditional black elbow pads and boots. THe young man is also sporting a similiar trench coat to Coltrane's own, though his is more a gray shade. He doesn't keep it on long though, as he charges quickly down to the ring, throwing it off his back as he does and leaping up onto the ring apron. He then springboards into the ring and leaps right at the rising Coltrane, taking him down with an impressive springboard crossbody! Once again, the mimic goes down, now clutching his chest in pain. Shade then turns his attention to Coltrane as he hops back up. Magnum takes a swing with a clothesline, but Travis quickly ducks underneath it, then spinning around and nailing Constance with a beautiful spinning sole kick to the face, taking Constance down to the mat quickly! James groans, grasping at his features in pain as he slowly sits up. Shade however isn't done yet, stomping the mat, then unleashing a second brutal buzzsaw kick, cracking Constance right between the eyes and putting him on his back! Instinctively, he rolls off to the side while Shade eyes the now rising Coltrane, who seems rather annoyed with this young upstart. Travis simply smirks and unleashes a high roundhouse, the enigmatic Coltrane however ducking underneath it, then scooping Travis up into the air and slamming him to the ground with a simple body slam! Travis grasps his back slightly, rising back to his feet, only to recieve an instant Sole Kick from Coltrane's own feet, cracking him in the face and taking him down as well. The man then pursues and begins stomping viciously across Shade's prone form, not about to let this rookie show him up. Constance meanwhile is seen rising up to his feet, further rubbing over his face as the crowd begins to count along. 5.....4......3......2.....1.

Tom: Another entrant on the way!

BUZZ!

For the first time this evening, the crowd hears a remixed version of Nelly Furtado's "Maneater" & they start cheering as Fannie Package walks out on stage clad in similar attire to earlier, but with the word "CHAMPION" emblazoned across her chest. Fannie holds her arms outstretched, one of her belts in each hand, before she strikes a Double Biceps pose allowing her belts to slip down on to her extremely broad shoulders. A flash of pyro silhouettes her enormous physiqye before she carries on down the aisle.

Finkel: Introducing, from San Francisco, California, standing six feet, three inches tall, weighing in at 292lbs, the Undisputed Wrestling's Innovative Genesis Women's Champion... FAN~NIE... PACK~AGE!!!

Tom: The extremely popular Undisputed W*I*G Women's Champion, Fannie Package, looking to add even more gold to her accolades this evening.

Jeannie: She may well be the strongest, hottest person in W*I*G, but she will by no means have it easy with the talent assembled here tonight?

Tom: "Hottest"?

Jeannie: ... I didn't say that out loud, did I?

Tom: If she can win this match, we'll be seeing plenty of Package here tonight.

Fannie carries on down the ramp, stopping occassionally to show off her chiselled abs, or enormous qudriceps as some of the crowd cheer & some look away. She slaps hands with a few ring-side fans as she goes past, before climbing into the ring & flexing her massive physique again. However as soon as she's entered, Coltrane charges right her, unleashing a furious flurry of elbow smashes to her face. The woman grimaces a bit from these, not at all pleased with this welcoming as she rears back and drives a headbutt right into Coltrane's face, sending him to the ground with ease! Constance rises up himself and leaps at the Women's Champion with a high dropkick, only for her to quickly swat his legs aside, sending him down to the canvas with ease! Constance grasps at his chest slightly and pushes back to his feet, stumbling forward right into a powerful toe kick from Miss Package, doubling him over with ease from the force. She then follows with a powerful clubbing blow, knocking James down onto his stomach as he grasps further at his torso. Package then stomps forward, only for Travis Shade to charge in and clip her in the leg with a low dropkick! She stops briefly, grimacing a little, as Shade then follows up with a quick series of stomps to that leg. He then bounces quickly off the ropes, charging back at Package quite quickly and grabbing her by the neck, looking for a Tornado DDT! Package however manages to throw him off in mid move, the young man landing on his feet, immediately leaping back with a super kick attempt! Package however catches him by this leg, then pulling him up over her head with ease! Travis looks on in horror as he's pressed up by this mighty woman, wriggling desperately to escape. Package meanwhile turns around and heads over towards the ropes, pressing him above her head and launching him towards the outside! Travis however manages to grab the ropes in mid air and swing back onto the apron, looking quite relieved as he grasps the ring ropes firmly. Package meanwhile turns back around and looks quite proud, flexing her muscles to the delight of the crowd. However in the middle of these flexings, Coltrane and Magnum both charge in at her from each side, unleashing a pair of toe kicks to the woman and managing to hunch her over from their combined efforts. The two of them then grab her by the neck and attempt to take her down with a double DDT. Package however has other ideas, blocking them both with a pair of punches to the chests, then hoisting them up with her mighty arms and unleashing a double vertical suplex, taking them both down to the canvas with ease! As she does, the counter begins to count down once again. 5......4.......3.......2.......1.

Tom: What strength being demonstrated by Fannie Package!

Jeannie: And just in time for our next entrant…

BUZZ!

As the buzzer goes off, Rashed Majed's Mashkalni picks up on the Colvintron, the crowd cheering loudly once more as the Arabian Aqil Ghassan quickly charges down to the ring, also donning his usual emerald green tights, elbow pads, knee pads, and white fingerless gloves and boots. He is sans headrobe tonight it seems as the young man quickly slides into the ring, going right after Fannie Package. The woman eyes him quickly and readies herself. She swings hard with a one armed slap, Ghassan however sidestepping it, then rearing back and unleashing a stiff knife edge chop across her chest, Package grimacing from the force of it. Ghassan then unleashes a few more of these, battering the bethemoth of a woman looming before him, but not doing much damage it seems. Eventually Package catches him by an arm and pulls him forward, delivering a powerful clothesline and taking him down to the mat quickly. He grasps his throat a bit as he pushes back to his feet, as Package snatches him up in mid rise, hoisting him up it seems for a powerbomb! Meanwhile, Constance and Coltrane both rise back up, eying each other once again and beginning to unleash a flurry of simple fists upon one another, both men battering one another quite furiously with their bare hands. As the two battle, Package sets Ghassan up for a powerbomb! However before she can complete the move, Travis Shade springs off behind her with a missile dropkick, nailing her in the back and sending her stumbling forward in surprise! Ghassan then sensing an opportunity rears back and delivers a quick series of headbutts to her face, Fannie grimacing from this assault as she drops to a knee. Ghassan then lands on his feet before her and motions over to Shade nearby as he rises. The young man nods back and heads over. Ghassan then swings behind and applies a tight full nelson on the giant champion, Package a bit too dazed to counter. Travis then slips in front of her and rears back, unleashing a powerful roaring elbow right between the eyes! Package gasps in pain, grabbing at her face in response. Travis then slips behind the woman and wraps his legs tightly around her waist. He then reaches up and struggles to apply a Crossface Chicken Wing across her, as Ghassan meanwhile grabs her by a leg and locks in an ankle lock. While this is going on, the counter is once more nearing the next entrant. 5......4.......3......2......1.

Tom: TWO submission holds being applied simultaneously!

Jeannie: This is like some sort of three-way…that I’d like to join.

Tom: …yeesh, of course you would…and, at that, it’s time for the next entrant!

BUZZ!

The entrance ramp suddenly lights up once again, as a calliope can be heard tooting away from the Colvintron, an instrumental of O Canada picking up on the Colvintron. Soon an unfamiliar man emerges from the back, a set of short blonde hair and a twisty style moustache present on his face. His chest is carpeted quite completely with body hair, which is obscured slightly by a red and black striped singlet. He also sports a set of matching elbow and knee pads as well as a simple pair of black boots. The crowd simply watches with curiosity as this man flexes his strongman physique, seeming to challenge even Fannie Package's muscular build. He puffs out his chest with pride and heads towards the ring. He ascends the steel steps, wiping his feet carefully along the ring apron, flashing a rather confident smile as he flexes yet again.

Tom: That’s Tornado Jones—formerly known as Crippler Jones—a brand-new addition to our roster!

Jeannie: Oh, what a moustache like that could be used for…

Tom: Hey, don’t make me have you thrown out of here!

He then steps over the ropes, turning his attention immediately towards Miss Package as she's trapped still in a combined submission from Travis and Ghassan, struggling to escape this predicament. The man known as Tornado Jones simply stomps right up to these two, as Coltrane and Constance continue to brawl nearby. Jones lunges in and drives the point of his elbow right into Shade's complexion, the young man gasping in pain from this blow as he loosens his grip. Jones then rears back with a second elbow shot, this time managing to knock him off Package completely. The man flashes a rather gentlemanly smile down at his fellow bodybuilder, then stomping over and hoisting up the now prone Travis, who looks rather dazed at the moment. Package meanwhile pushes back to a vertical base, then rears back with a mighty elbow to Ghassan's face, knocking him free from her ankle as he stumbles back and grasps it. She then turns around and lunges forward, delivering a powerful clothesline to take Aqil off his feet once more, the young man grasping at his neck once again. Jones meanwhile wraps both of his mighty arms around Travis's head, pulling him into a cravate. He then quickly drops down and plants him into the canvas with a Snap DDT! Shade bounces hard off the canvas and grabs at his own neck in retaliation, Tornado meanwhile sitting back up and rising to his feet. Almost immediately as he does though, Package looks right at him, a rather curious look in her eyes. The muscleman simply gazes right back and flexes his mighty biceps once again, only for her to flex her own right back in response! The two powerful competitors then step right up to one another and have a bit of a stare down, looking over one another quite intently. However as they do so, Constance and Coltrane both charge back in and nail them with a pair of dropkicks to the sides of their faces, both Package and Tornado both stumbling back a bit as these connect, rubbing at their cheeks slightly as they come near the ropes. Almost immediately as they get close, Coltrane, Constance, Ghassan, and Shade all charge in and attempt to dump the both of them out at once, Ghassan and Constance focusing on Package while Shade and Coltrane handle Jones. They manage to get them a quarter from off the ground, when the counter can be heard counting down once more. 5.....4......3......2......1.

Jeannie: TWO possible eliminations could be taking place soon…

Tom: And there’s a new entrant coming on top of that!

BUZZ!

Suddenly the rather creepy tone of Fantomas's Rosemary's Baby begins to echo throughout the Colvintron, the crowd looking quite intently towards the entrance once more. A vaguely familiar figure walks out softly from the back, clad in a black long sleeved medical gown that goes all the way up to their neck and covers everything below other than his hands. A pair of black boots and leather shorts can vaguely be made out from beneath this attire it seems. Gehenna hauntingly walks down towards the ring, averting his gaze from the other competitors as they continue to try and dump out Package and Tornado. He then simply rolls into the ring, rising back to his feet and skulking over to one of the turnbuckle, simply sitting down and curling up into a ball for the moment.

The other competitors haven't noticed him just yet it seems as they keep up their efforts in eliminating the two biggest factors in the match. Eventually though Package and Tornado escape, shoving the four men off their form using their pure size, sending them all rolling along the mat with ease! They quickly rise back up as Package and Tornado begin plodding over in their direction, saving their own confrontation for now it seems. Once again the four men charge right at them, Coltrane and Ghassan aiming at Package with a pair of low dropkicks to that already hurting leg of her's, dropping the woman to a knee as she grips it slightly. Constance and Shade meanwhile attack Jones, James meanwhile charging right at the bodybuilder, ducking under a thrown clothesline of his, then bouncing right back and leaping up as high as he can, delivering a powerful jumping knee to the forehead, managing to send the massive being staggering back from the force! He rubs at it in pain, as Shade meanwhile leaps up as he stumbles and wraps his legs around his form, grabbing one of his arms and applying a Crucifix armbar, wrenching back on the limb as he clings tightly onto his shape. Ghassan and Coltrane in the meanwhile unleashing a stomping fury to Package's leg, who grimaces in pain. Ghassan then grabs and manages to prop it up on the bottom rope, Coltrane then springing off those ropes into the air before coming back down, driving a boot across that limb. Package grimaces a bit further as Coltrane then drags that leg off the ropes and holds it down. Ghassan then drops down and applies a firm Crucifix Kneebar from the ground, Fannie struggling to endure this combined assault as she remains seated on the mat. Coltrane meanwhile springs off the ropes and comes back, delivering a Constance style leaping knee to her face, putting her flat on her back! As this all goes on, Gehenna can still be seen in the corner, seemingly not even paying attention to the match as he remains in this curled up position. Once again the countdown returns. 5......4......3......2......1.

Jeannie: And Gehenna isn’t even doing anything. But that’s smart, in a very creepy and disturbing way.

BUZZ!

Suddenly Eddie Grant's Electric Avenue picks up on the Colvintron as the crowd cheers at the sound of this familiar tune! Sure enough, the roller disco loving frat boy drunk rolls out from the entrance archway, a fairly built looking man gliding down the rampway clutching a twelve pack in one hand and a six pack in the other. He speeds down to the ring, crashing into the ring apron with a light grunt as he hunches over, though still keeping a hold on his "refreshments" The young man sets down his drinks on the outside of the ring, then slipping under the ropes and into the ring. Still wearing those skates, he glides right at an occupied Tornado Jones and delivers a roller skate assisted big boot, the muscleman gasping in pain as he drops down on his back, Shade not realizing this until too late as he's flattened underneath his mass! He groans from underneath, as Jones meanwhile grabs at his own face in horror, checking it for blood. Cordova meanwhile bounces back off the ropes and makes his way quickly towards Package on the mat. He then drops down with a leg drop in mid move across her throat, the W*I*G* Women's Champion gasping in pain as connects. However before he can get back up, Coltrane lunges in with a diving forearm, clocking Ronnie right in the face and putting him on his back! He then immediately reaches down and begins untying those skates of his, loosening them quickly before removing them from his feet. He then rolls them out of the ring, sending them crashing to the outside a light thud. He then begins stomping intently across Cordova's prone form, who kind of wriggles along the mat, perhaps numb to the pain for SOME reason. Eventually, the mysterious Coltrane yanks him up off the mat and grabs him by the throat, running forward and tossing him over the ropes! Cordova tumbles over the ropes onto the apron, but manages to keep ahold for now. He lands on the apron and wobbles a bit in place, as Coltrane quickly goes back to work on Package, now focusing his stomping fury at that leg of her's, Ghassan meanwhile keeping that Kneebar clinched on. As they do so, Package lunges out with her free foot and boots Ghassan's right in the face, quickly loosening his grip on her mighty tree trunkesque leg. The Arabian gasps out in pain, as the mighty Package delivers a series of further boots to knock him free. She then follows up by lunging out and delivering a mighty slap to Coltrane's own face, sending the young man sailing away from her as well. Soon after, the counter begins to wind down again. 5....4.....3.....2.....1.

Jeannie: Ow!

Tom: What a Coin Purse from Fannie Packge, powerful enough to send Coltrane LITERALLY flying!

BUZZ!

Soon enough, another familiar sound is heard as "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" pumps out of the Colvintron, the crowd cheering loudly as they hear this equally familiar music. Surely enough, the man known as the Drunken Demon Paul Podanski wanders out, a huge grin on his face as he heads down towards the ring, slapping the fans hands while making his way towards the rest. He quickly slides into the ring and looks down at his opponents, most of whom are still down at the moment. He waits patiently, Ghassan the first one to get up. Immediately Podanski unloading on him with a rapid series of fists, the Arabian man caught off guard as he staggers from these blows, the rather rotund man then winding up and pitching out a final punch, sending Aqil tumbling back to the canvas! He then eyes the rising Tornado Jones and charges forward, leaping up and hitting him immediately with a big splash to the chest, driving the air out of the Canadian newcomer whose eyes bulge out in pain, the man quickly laying flat back on the ground now clutching at his chest. He then turns around just in time to spot Coltrane who lunges in, hoisting him up high into the air with a Manhattan Drop and driving him down onto his knee! The insidious imitator gasps out in pain, clutching at his... lower regions slightly before Paul follows up with a clothesline to take him back off his feet! The Alabamian then dusts his hands off and turns his around, only to bump into the possibly enibriated Ronnie L Cordova. The two of them immediately size one another up and have a stare down. Meanwhile Constance pushes back to his feet, now curiously looking over in the bizarre Gehenna's direction, the "creature" not having budged an inch still. As he moves in to come closer, Shade suddenly lunges in from nowhere with a swift kick to the side, quickly grabbing James attention as he grimaces from the move. Travis then unleashes a series of more stinging feet, now backing Constance up towards the ropes as he endures these blows, the cocky young man grimacing a bit as he feels the effects of his... flattening earlier. He eventually manages to send James up against the ropes and flashes a cocky grin. The young man swiftly charges right at James, only for the Hawaiian to drop down and dump him to the outside. Shade however lands on the apron unbeknownst to the relieved Constance. He then unleashes another especially swift kick from the apron, nailing Constance in the face as he turns around to check and putting him flat on his back! He then charges over towards the turnbuckle nearby and leaps atop, coming down and colliding with his Dream Sequence, Constance gasping for air as he comes back down atop his prone shape. He rolls along the mat in pain as Travis pushes back to his feet slowly, grabbing at his own chest. He then reaches down and scoops up Magnum off the canvas, looking to toss him out. However before he can, Fannie Package charges in with a Northern Lariat, knocking the young man onto all fours! He gasps in pain as he's hit from behind, the mighty Package then cradling him into her arms with ease and stomping towards the ropes. However before she toss him out, Coltrane sneaks in and leaps up with a high dropkick from behind, sending Package stumbling forward and causing her to drop Shade to the outside! Travis hits the mat with a thud and groans, as the first elimination has occurred. Just in time for the counter to start winding back down. 5.....4.....3......2......1.

Tom: And that’s our first elimination for the night! Travis Shade is out!

Jeannie: Not too bad when it’s your first match…

BUZZ!

[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykmXDTlSn34Natalie Portman's Shaved Head's Me + Yr Daughter[/url] picks up next on the Colvintron, the crowd booing once more as the familiar Andy Duke waltzes out from the back, a rather cocky smirk on his complexion as he walks out. He eyes the competitors still inside the ring and immediately makes a beeline towards them, sprinting down the rampway and sliding into the ring! He then goes after the rising Tornado Jones and leaps up with a high dropkick, sending the muscleman stumbling forwards a bit. Duke then pops back up and charges at the grounded Constance, nailing him with a sliding dropkick to the face, sending him rolling further along the canvas. He then kips back up with a rather proud expression, before going after Podanski and Cordova, leaping at them both with a double clothesline. The two sizeable men however almost immediately turn around and catch him in midair, powering him down to the canvas with a mighty two man spinebuster! Duke's eyes bug out in pain as he grasps at his back, now in similiar position to Constance. The two frequent drunks then grin wide at one another, as Cordova heads over and scoops up that twelve pack and pops two of the brewskis out, then tossing them over to Podanski who catches them with a grin. He then pulls two more free, as Ghassan meanwhile pushes back to his feet nearby. Then then quickly pop the tops on these beverage and clash them together, taking a quick swig of the stuff, then turning around and spitting it right into the eyes of the charging Ghassan, who immediately covers his eyes and yelps out in surprise, blindly stumbling back and falling to the canvas as he tries to recover. The two men share a hearty laugh and quickly down all four of these drinks at once, before smashing the cans up against one anothers heads to flatten them. Meanwhile on the other side, Gehenna is simply watching vacantly from the corner, yet to be disturbed from his slumber of sorts. Nearby Fannie Package and Coltrane are now coming to blows, Coltrane focusing a series of stiff Shade-like kicks on Package's already smarting leg, as she meanwhile tries to lunge out and grab him, only for Coltrane to avoid each attempt. Meanwhile, Podanski and Cordova have cornered Tornado Jones and begin unloading on him with a series of body blows, the mighty man staggering back from their efforts as they begin to back him towards the ropes, seeming intent on elimination. Ghassan is still down on the mat trying to get the brew out of his eyes, while Constance is starting to recover as he pushes back to his feet. The counter once again begins to tick. 5....4.....3.....2.....1.

Tom: It’s time for yet another entrant now!

Jeannie: Who can it be now?…*saxophone sounds*

BUZZ!

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

"Violence Fetish" begins playing over the PA system, and the fans take notice as they turn their heads to the stage. As one, they cheer loudly as they see a blue-haired man standing tall in a green trenchcoat, his arms crossed over his head to form an 'X' as he flips them off, and then lowers them into a crotch chop. He walks down the ramp smoothly as he slaps hands with the crowd, smiling as he appears just as excited to be here as the fans.

Howard Finkel: Making his way to the ring, at 219 lbs....he is the Innovator of FULLY UNREHEARSED NUTTINESS...JOE! RAGNAL!

Tom: What the-?! JOE RAGNAL is here! Ladies and gentlemen, the Innovator of Fully Unrehearsed Nuttiness has returned to the ring after nearly a year of absence!

Jeannie: Fully Unrehears-...what? THat sounds like a lame excuse to get the acronym of FUN!

Tom: Exactly!

Nearly everyone in the ring cranes their necks towards the entrance way, watching as Joe Ragnal slides eagerly into the ring! He immediately goes right after the rising Andy Duke who is stumbling to his feet, taking him down with a well placed spear! He then pops back up to his feet, then turning around and going after Coltrane, grabbing him from behind and taking him down to the canvas with a lungblower, the young man grimacing in pain as he's taken down. Ragnal then quickly leaps back to his feet and ducks under a thrown Package clothesline, who stumbles forward as she misses. Joe then sprints over towards the ropes, springboarding off them and leaping right back with a springboard knee to the face, driving it right between Package's features and sending her tumbling down the mat with a powerful thud! The crowd explodes with cheers as Ragnal rises back up and flashes a huge grin. He then reaches down and grabs a prone Andy Duke, holding him by the neck and flinging him over the ropes! Duke however manages to keep ahold of the ropes like many others, Ragnal immediately noticing this and looking on with annoyance, now stomping on his advesary's form as he clings desperately onto the bottom rope, trying to hang on. Meanwhile Podanski and Cordova have Tornado Jones backed into a turnbuckle, as the two men back up to the opposite side of the ring. Cordova then grabs and whips Paul full speed, only for him to reverse in midrun, sending Ronnie barreling right at Jones! Quickly though, the Canadian manages to side step, sending the frat boy crashing hard into the padding with a gasp of pain. The young man stumbles out of the corner trying to recover, when suddenly Constance flies in out of nowhere, grabbing him around the waist and flinging him out of the ring with a belly to belly suplex! Cordova lands on the outside with a thud, before passing out from likely sources. James takes a quick breather and turns back around, just in time to see Podanski glaring right at him, obviously not happy with his interference. He simply nods his head and motions for him to bring it on. Tornado Jones meanwhile stomps over to Ragnal, eying the trapped Duke and helping him out, both men now using their feet to try and force the desperate Duke out of this match, the man looking on in horror as they seem to be coming close to their goal. As they do, the counter begins to wind down again. 5......4......3......2.......1.

Tom: Andy Duke’s in some trouble now, facing a potential elimination.

Jeannie: It’d be something if he won though, especially for the sake of meeting his current partner and former rival later tonight!

BUZZ!

The lights in the W*I*G-Sphere drop for a moment as a low strumming sound is heard for 10 seconds. The lights are then flashing in a variety of bright colours as Osbourne's "No More Tears" kicks into full swing. The fans are craning their necks to see who is making their entrance, unfamiliar as some of them are with this particular music.

Jeannie: Who the hell is this? I don't recognize this theme.

Finkel: Introducing, from Nagasaki, Japan, standing 5 feet, ten inches tall, weighing in at 350lbs, representing TigerPath Wrestling... KU~JI~RA... MA~SA~HA~SHI!!!

*The monstous woman stomps out onto the stage. She's wearing a fluorescent green singlet that clings tightly to her hug from. She stomps on down to the ring, looking around in a surly manner at those already assembled in the ring & the audience surrounding her.*

Tom: SWEET FANNIE ADAMS! Look at the size of this woman. She's heavier than nearly every competitor here in W*I*G, let alone this match!

Jeannie: Do we know anything about her?

Tom: She's a heavily decorated wrestler in her native Japan & is, so far, the only woman to have held the Blazing Path Championship which is up for grabs tonight!

She begins cracking her knuckles & pounding one palm with a fist repeatedly before stretching her arms out & letting loose with a deep gutteral growl. She reaches up to the ropes & climbs into the ring causing several of those already in the ring to back off a bit. Immediately the woman stomps right over to the equally mighty Tornado Jones, delivering a powerful elbow to the back of his neck with the point, the Canadian man grimacing a bit and immediately turning around, taking his attention off of Duke. He then immediately recieves another brutal elbow, this time to the face, sending him staggering back a bit, the mighty woman following him in pursuit. Meanwhile, Podanski and Constance are also coming to blow, the two trading punches back and forth, a bit slower in Constance's case as the matches is taking it's toll on him. Nearby, Package and Coltrane rise up slowly, Fannie immediately grabbing him and hoisting him high above her head for another elimination! Coltrane once again snatches the ropes and desperately looks to prevent this elimination. And finally, Andy Duke has managed to slither back into the ring, Ragnal looking quite annoyed as he stomps relentless at the young man. Ghassan is starting to recover his vision in the meantime as he pushes back to his feet, immediately spotting Package as she tries to eliminate Coltrane, quickly running up to her from behind and attempting to throw her out himself, Package looking quite surprised by this as she turns her attention for a moment, allowing Coltrane to drop down himself and assist Ghassan in trying to eliminate the mammoth Fannie. Back where we started, Tornado is now starting to fight back himself with a few stiff elbows of his own, Kujira simply scowling from each one as she fires back with more of her own. The two sizeable creatures seem to be at a stalemate for a moment, though Kujira clearly has the advantage of being the fresher of them. While this is all going on, Gehenna still continues to bundle up in the corner. Constance meanwhile manages to duck a Podanski punch, lifting him up high wiht a flapjack and dropping him throat first atop the ropes, sending the plumper man stumbling back grasping at it, Constance then turning around and coming back with a clothesline, putting him on his back once more. He then looms above him, waiting for the man to rise. In the meantime, the counter counts once more. 5......4.......3.......2.......1.

Tom: You can tell now that this match is really starting to get to some of the participants.

Jeannie: And not just physical fatigue, either…the longer the match goes on, the more the adrenaline builds…

BUZZ!

The entrance way suddenly becomes bathed in a golden light as March to the Scaffold picks up next on the Colvintron, the crowd booing almost instantly, as a familiar blonde haired young man emerges from beneath the arch way. Hands folded calmly behind his back and a oddly calm smile on his face, the man quickly makes his way down towards the ring, as meanwhile in the ring Constance grabs the rising Paul and sets him up for an Ode to Tom Selleck! Podanski however drops down behind him and quickly counters with a Russian Leg Sweep, putting his advesary down on the canvas. As this is going on, Joshua slides into the ring and immediately charges in, going right after Ghassan as he hits him with a high dropkick from behind, the Arabian man immediately dropping Package as he grasps the back of it, now slowly turning around. Joshua then immediately begins barraging him with a vicious series of kicks all over his body, Aqil reeling back as endures this flurry of feet. The young man then aims a high roundhouse, only for his opponent to duck under and take him down to the mat with a leg takedown, immediately mounting and pounding relentlessly at his advesary with a series of fists, Joshua now grimacing himself as he tries to push the larger man off of him. Andy Duke in the meanwhile ducks under a Ragnal forearm and rakes him across the eyes deliberately, Joe gasping out in pain as he grasps his face. Duke then grabs him from behind and swings him around, launching him overhead with a beautiful Dragon Suplex! Joe goes sailing and lands on the mat with a thud, now grasping at his neck in pain. Tornado and Kujira meanwhile to exchange blows, Tornado clearly beginning to waver in his attacks, as the former Blazing Path Champion takes control, now rearing back with a discus elbow smash and smashing Jones right across the face, nearly knocking him down from the force. Kujira then scoops him up with ease in her arms, now looking on with grim intent, leaping up and slamming him into the canvas with a jumping piledriver! Jones gasps out in pain, now flopping limply to the mat as Masahashi simply shoves him aside with a boot, then turning her attention towards another worthy opponent in Fannie Package. Package on the other hand watches as Coltrane continues to try and hoist her over the top rope, the well built woman looking on with annoyance as she raises an arm high, delivering a powerful clubbing blow across the man's back. Coltrane gasps out in pain, falling to the canvas as he clutches the area, as Fannie bends down to take control. However before she can, she receives a mighty elbow smash to the facials, sending her staggering back from the force as she grasps the area. Kujira simply stomps after her, the ring quaking beneath her girth, and continues to unleash a series of these powerful shots. Meanwhile as this is going on, Joshua and Aqil continue to brawl, now rolling out onto the apron inadvertently. Immediately the two of them rise up and begin to batter one another with a series of absolutely vicious fists, both men wobbling a bit from each of these blows as they manage to hold onto the ring ropes, intent on eliminating the other from this match. Eventually Joshua drops down for a sweep quick, Aqil however managing to leap over that swift foot and landing on his feet, then delivering a massive headbutt to Joshua's face, sending the young man tumbling off, only to grab ahold of Aqil and take him down as well, both men being eliminated by these actions as they hit the mat! The two then slowly rise up and look at one another, before resuming their brawl as they unload on one another with a volley of relentless punches. The two men eventually battle their way over the barricade and continue their skirmish as they exit through the crowd. As this is going on, Andy Duke has climbed onto the rope, leaping off at Joe with his Picture Perfect Cross Body! Joe however lunges in and catches him in mid move with a desperation spear, Duke gasping out in pain as he comes crashing back down to the ground, just in time for the counter to wind down once more. 5......4.......3........2.......1.

Tom: Almost a P-P-C-B from Andy Duke, but not quite with a wild counter by Joe Ragnal!

Jeannie: And right before our next entrant…

BUZZ!

*Fatboy Slim’s “Weapon of Choice” hits over the speakers of the Colvintron as a vaguely familiar, squat-looking man with silver boots and long silver trunks with columns of fire as trim steps out onto the stage, both of his arms raised.*

Finkel: From Florence, South Carolina, weighing in at 373 pounds…MOOSE JACKSON!

Jeannie: Oh Lord…look at the size of this guy.

Tom: Moose Jackson got his first break in the wrestling business by doing the other major thing that he can claim to have as his specialty…………eating.

Moose lumbers down to the ring, slapping hands with the fans as he makes his way down the aisle. Upon reaching the ring, he climbs up the steps, slipping in between the top and middle ropes. As soon as he enters, the portly man scoops up a rising Constance, who looks a bit surprised, and slams him down to the canvas with a simple body slam! Constance grasps his back in pain as he rolls off to the side, Jackson then stepping forward and catching an attempted punch from the rising Podanski, then countering with one of his own, knocking the even smaller man back a bit, Moose immediately firing off a further series of these shots to his advesary. He then rears back with a mighty headbutt, driving it right into Paul's face and taking him off his feet! He then turns his attention towards the other, only for Joe and Coltrane to charge in from both sides, the two men clipping him in both legs with a set of low dropkicks! Jackson stumbles back a bit in surprise, now reaching down and grasping at those pudgy thighs of his. Joe and Coltrane meanwhile rise back to their feet, bouncing off the other side of the ropes and lunging in behind him, following up with a swift double chop block, sending the mound of a man wobbling backwards as he nearly falls backwards from the combination, but manages to right himself somehow. On the other side of the ring, Fannie and Kujira are now exchanging a series of powerful blows, Masahashi pounding away at her face with some stiff elbows, Package pummeling her in return with some grueling girly slaps to her own complexion. At the moment, neither of them seems to be wavering in their assaults. Elsewhere, Tornado Jones is stumbling back to his feet slowly, grasping desperately at his neck. Andy Duke follows soon after, the two immediately locking eyes and going after one another. Elsewhere, Coltrane and Joe both have Moose by his flabby neck, looking for a double swinging neckbreaker. They quickly go to deliver the move, only for their opponent to counter in mid swing, taking them down instead with a pair of powerful clotheslines! Joe and Coltrane go down hard to the canvas, both men grasping desperately at their throats. Jackson then turns his attention towards the ropes with a smile, then bending over slowly and scooping Coltrane into his arms, quickly stomping over towards the ropes and attempting to toss him over. Coltrane however once again snatches the top rope as he's held up, once again preventing his elimination. Jackson watches this with annoyance, now struggling to try and pry him free from them. As he does, Duke now begins to bombard Tornado with a series of swift feet to the sides, the well toned man enduring these with a bit of a grimace, before eventually reaching out and catching him by one of these legs with ease, Duke looking on in horror at this, then bending that leg over his mighty neck and applying a racked leg lock! Duke cries out in pain as he feels the man bending and tugging on that leg of his, desperately trying to escape his tight grip. Elsewhere, Package and Masahashi continue to assault each other quite intently, the two women refusing to give in to the other's attacks.Eventually, Package attempts a clothesline to her bloated opponent, only for her to catch it with ease, then pulling her up with ease high into the air, then powering her down into the canvas with a powerbomb! Fannie's eyes widen in pain as she's driven to the mat, writhing in pain as she lays there. On the other side of things, Jackson manages to remove Coltrane from the ropes and looks to finish eliminating him, only for the man to lunge in at the last second and rake him across the eyes! Jackson cries out in pain, stumbling back away from the ropes and grabbing at them closely. Coltrane takes a quick breath before springing off the nearby ropes and leaping right back, nailing Jackson right between the eyes with a springboard dropkick, taking a page from Duke, Ragnal, and even Shade's book. Jackson quickly tumbles to the canvas, landing with a mighty thud as he grasps at his face. In the meantime, Constance is back to his feet, the man quickly laying back for a bit as he watches the others. In particular the likes of Joe Ragnal and Paul Podanski as they both meet up face to face, the two men looking at one another quite closely, before quickly beginning to unload on one another, Ragnal firing off with a series of forearms to his larger opponent, Paul being battering with each one and answering with some simple fists to the face in return. And soon enough, the counter counts down for the last entrant. 5......4.......3......2......1.

Tom: Shots are being fired back and forth, and just in time for our FINAL entrant!

BUZZ!

Work it, make it, do it, makes us,
Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

As “Stronger” picks up over the speakers, a grinning Jack Jupiter struts onto the stage, to immediate—though once again, confused—boos, clad in his usual ring gear and an oversized, fire-orange fur coat. Upon the coat are well over 20 horizontally-arranged, unbuckled rubber belts and around his neck are several ornate, multi-colored paisley scarves; upon his face is a pair of big, dark-blue translucent shades. His bodyguard Dreia Borbone follows him not far behind with the usual glazed expression on her face and the ubiquitous leather briefcase in hand.

Finkel: From San Diego, California, weighing in at 224 pounds…JACK…JUUUUUPITERRRRRR!

Jeannie: Thanks for coming out of wherever you were hiding, Jack!

Tom: He’s in no rush to enter this match, though…

Jack continues to strut down the aisle at a VERY deliberate pace, his head bobbing up and down in time with the music. Dreia continues to follow behind him at a very constant but relatively short distance, her free hand on a hip as they move back and forth in time with the music, much like the head of her client. Halfway down the aisle, Jack stops full-team, Dreia stopping behind him the moment he stops. Jack raises his arms in a sense of mock caution as a cascade of golden pyro erupts from the stage behind him. Just as the pyro seems to have petered off, Jack drops his shades and folds his arms behind his back, leaning back as another cascade of pyro, this one made of blue and orange bursts, runs back and forth along the stage. With the stage finally blanketed in a thick smoke from all the pyrotechnics, Jack resumes his normal entrance, continuing down the aisle. When he reaches the ring, he turns to his bodyguard, gesturing for her to hold out her free hand. She obliges, upon which he begins taking off his entrance gear, dropping everything upon her arm, much to her complete disinterest. At this, Jack finally jumps onto the apron and enters the ring. The man then struts with a cocky swagger, watching as everyone else engages in battle seemingly not even noticing said pyro and ballyhoo. Jack quickly begins scanning the area to see who he should go after first. He then spots the perfect target, now stomping over to where the curled up Gehenna can be seen, almost looking as if he's fallen asleep. Jupiter simply stretches his hands rather cockily, then immediately reaching up and scooping the seemingly comatose man from off the canvas into his hands. As soon as he does however, Gehenna drives a vicious knee right into Jack's forehead, sending him stumbling backwards in surprise! He immediately drops the bizarrely attired man, grasps at that forehead in pain, and flashes an angry look at his opponent. Gehenna meanwhile looks back at him with an almost vacant look, before lunging in and beginning to batter him relentlessly with a series of wild punches, Jupiter quickly guarding his face as these blows are unleashed upon him. The disturbed man then ducks under a wild Jupiter clothesline, grabbing him from behind and hoisting him for a backdrop, only to transition in mid air into a complete shot, sending Jupiter crashing first to the mat with ease! The arrogant young man quickly rolls off to the side, still guarding his face quite intently. Gehenna simply glares down at him and continues his pursuit, now laying a series of violent boots to his prone form as he lies on the canvas.

Jeannie: Remind me to never piss Gehenna off.

Tom: I’ll remind Jack Jupiter to, just for his personal health. On second thought…maybe not.

On the other side of the ring, Duke remains clinched in Tornado's racked leg lock, still looking desperately for a way out. Eventually he finds one... delivering a blatent boot with his free leg right between the Canadian's own! The young man's eyes immediately widen in pain as he collapses to the canvas clutching at the area. Andy Duke meanwhile grabs desperately at his limb, before pushing back slowly to his feet, using the ropes for assistance. Meanwhile Masahashi looks on with grim intents at the downed Package, now turning her attention towards the turnbuckle in front of her. Fannie is still down on the canvas, trying to recover from that devastating powerbomb from earlier, still writhing along the canvas in agony. Joe in the meantime leaps up with a high dropkick as he ducks under a thrown Podanski fist, nailing him right between the eyes and sending him staggering back a bit, grasping at his facials. He then leaps up for an Enziguri, aiming to nail his opponent in the side of the head. Paul however ducks this kick and then grabs Ragnal by the legs, planting him into the canvas with a sitout wheelbarrow facebuster! The FUN fellow gasps out in pain, grabbing at his own complexion and rolling slowly onto his side. Paul then eyes the turnbuckle and flashes a big grin, quickly making his way over and ascending the top, just as Coltrane, Andy Duke, and KUJIRA all do the same! The four of them then leap off towards their opponents with a four pack of moonsaults, Coltrane, Andy Duke, and Paul all connecting, but Fannie managing to roll out of the way of Masahashi's own, thankfully! A loud series of loud thuds can be heard as they all come down, the crowd now beginning a chant of "That was Awesome!" Moose Jackson, Tornado Jones, and especially Joe Ragnal all look on in pain, as Fannie meanwhile slowly pushes back to her feet, grasping at her neck as she does. Jupiter on the other hand is trying to get back to his feet, looking absolutely horrified by this assault he's already endured, quickly trying to slip away. Gehenna however has other plans in mind, grabbing him by the hair and yanking him back over, then delivering a vicious headbutt right to the face, knocking the arrogant one on his back. He then mounts him from the top and begins raining down wild fists upon him, Jack desperately guarding himself once more these furious attacks.

Jeannie: HOLY SHI—

Tom: WHAT A SALVO OF MOONSAULTS! I’m surprised the ring itself didn’t collapse from that one!

Moose Jackson is the first to rise from this moonsault, hunching over slightly as he does. Coltrane immediately goes to work, grabbing the bloated being and pulling him over towards the ropes, immediately trying to dump him to the outside. Constance nearby quickly rises up and helps him in his efforts, grabbing and attempting to heave Jackson out himself as well. Paul meanwhile hoists up the fallen Ragnal and cradles him in his own grip, quickly looking to dump him to the outside as well. Ragnal seems to notice this and quickly wraps both his arms and legs instinctively around the ropes, looking to prevent his elimination. Andy Duke elsewhere reaches down and tries to pull Tornado Jones back to his own feet, who hasn't recovered from that earlier "attack" He struggles for a bit, but eventually manages to pull him to a vertical base. Duke then pushes him back against the ropes and attempts to force him all the way over! Jones quickly hooks his arms under those ropes behind him and braces himself, also resisting his own elimination. Elsewhere, Fannie Package is back up to her feet, now eying the downed Masahashi as she looks on with a rather confident smile. The woman then reaches down and scoops the former Blazing Path Champion to her feet with relative ease, then quickly bends down and attempts to press her up onto her shoulders, face straining in pain as she does so. Kujira, even in her current state, proves to be just as mighty a challenge in this regard, her girth proving difficult for even the well built Package to press into the air. She soon comes close to this task only for Kujira to reach down in desperation, raking her across the eyes quite blatantly! Package gasps out in pain, dropping down once more to her knees as they soon give out beneath her, sending both mammoth women crashing back down to the canvas.

Jeannie: …does the ring have insurance?

Tom: No, but as the match is going now, I’m thinking it’s not such a bad idea.

Coltrane and Constance have meanwhile come at least half way to dumping Jackson, only for him to finally fight back with a clubbing blow across both their backs, Coltrane and Constance both hesitating for a bit as they struggle to maintain their efforts. Jackson however follows up with a second twin shot and manages to get them away for now. Jackson then steps forward and takes Coltrane down with a thick clothesline, sending the man down to the canvas once more! He then turns around and aims another at James, sending him tumbling over the ropes and nearly to the outside! Constance however manages to grab ahold of the ropes in mid rotation, feet now dangling just inches from the ground. He then quickly skins the proverbial cat as Jackson hoists up the fallen Coltrane, looking to make it two in a row. However as he turns around, he immediately spots Constance, who gives him a rather cocky smirk, though grabbing at his neck a bit. Angrily, Jackson drops Coltrane to the mat once more and charges right at him to make sure of elimination! However as he comes close, Constance ducks down and manages to back drop him to the outside of the ring, Jackson himself failing to snatch the ropes as he crashes to the outside a massive thud.

Tom: And so ends the match for Moose Jackson!

Jeannie: And the ring is a lighter place, in more ways than one…

Tom: Racist!

Jeannie: Whoa-whoa-whoa! NOT what I meant!

With our final ten now in the ring, Constance hunches back up slowly. However he's just in time to meet Coltrane whose quickly back to his feet, grabbing James and trying to give him the heave ho from this bout once more. Constance once again tries to resist, though it's definitely harder after having gotten ridden of the mound of fat that was Moose Jackson. Back in the center of the ring, Gehenna has finally gotten off of Jupiter, now looking around with wild eyes towards the others all around him, a rather horrified expression in his eyes. Immediately he dashes at the nearest of them, Andy Duke in this case, quickly grabbing and beginning to batter him with wild forearms, Duke barely able to defend himself as he reels back from these blows as he's backed up into the nearby turnbuckle. Gehenna then quickly backs away and charges right back at him, leaping up with a corner dropkick right to the features of his advesary, Duke slumping down to the bottom of it as he feels the effects. Kujira meanwhile rises back to her feet slowly, as she looks down with anger at Package on the mat. Immediately the mighty woman turns her attention back towards the turnbuckle and ascends the top of it once again. However before she can leap off this time, Tornado Jones has made his way over and grabbed one of her rather fat legs. Masahashi immediately glances back as she feels him grab ahold, a look of hatred forming on her face. Immediately she rears back and delivering a back elbow right to his face, sending the bodybuilder staggering away from her with ease. She then refocuses her attention on Package and leaps off for a second moonsault! She however lands right into Package's arms once more, the crowd looking on in shock, as does Masahashi herself! Package then stumbles backwards and manages to send Kujira tumbling over the ropes and to the outside! The woman then doubles over and pants heavily, trying to recover. As soon as she does however, Coltrane, Jack Jupiter, Andy Duke, and even Gehenna immediately rush in from behind, quickly grabbing hold and attempting to rid of her, nearly making it all the way as they do! Package however is somehow able to keep holding on, using her considerable size to her advantage. But as she does, Dreia suddenly appears from her previous position, reaching up and simply whacking Package upside the side with her briefcase, dazing her momentarily and allowing the four men to finally hoist her form out of the ring, sending it crashing to the outside. Her work done, Dreia then simply strolls back over to her previous position, hand placed on her hip once more, as she gives a subtle nod to Jupiter inside the ring.

Tom: What a way for Fannie Package to be eliminated! It’s too bad that things like this have to happen, but it’s no DQ, so anything is within the rules.

Jeannie: Also, Jack’s probably glad she’s his bodyguard.

Tom: If nothing else, he’s still in this match, and I’m sure that alone matters to him a LOT.

Almost immediately after Fannie is disposed of, Gehenna immediately lunges right at Andy Duke once again, battering him with another furious flurry of wild punches. The member of Bros B4 Hos once again guards his face as he stumbles backwards from this wild onslaught, trying to escape him once again. Eventually, he swings at him with a desperate clothesline, Gehenna instinctively ducking under it. He then grabs Duke around the neck and quickly sets him up for a Jumping Russian Leg Sweep. Duke however manages to block the move, delivering a stiff elbow to the side of the head to daze Gehenna, then going behind him quickly and hoisting him up for a high backdrop suplex! Gehenna slams into the mat and cries out in pain, quickly rolling to the side, a rather surprised look in his eyes. Elsewhere, Paul is still trying to throw the desperate Ragnal over the top ropes, pushing forward with the all force he can muster in order to do so. Eventually Ragnal manages to shove Paul off with a stiff boot to the face, sending the Alabamian staggering back in surprise. Ragnal then drops down onto the ring apron and springs off the ropes, wrapping his legs in mid air around Podanski's throat and taking him down into a swift Ragnasteiner! Paul goes tumbling forward, sending him down to the mat with a thud. Joe meanwhile lays sprawled out nearby, now taking a quick breather. Constance meanwhile, having escaped another Coltrane elimination attempt is taking another breather, unaware that Andy Duke is now stalking him from behind, the partner of the current champion looking to assert himself. He stomps the mat in anticipation, watching as Constance begins to sit up then charging full speed for a Shining Wizard! James however seems to see it coming, rolling out of the way at the last moment. Duke stumbles forward in surprise, quickly stopping himself before he hits the ropes, an absolutely furious look in his eyes as he kicks them. The young man then turns back around, only to immediately get scooped by Constance and launched up with a throwing Ode to Tom Selleck, sending him crashing to the outside! The crowd cheers loudly as Constance steps back for a bit, once again taking another breather.

Tom: Unfortunately for Andy Duke, he couldn’t hang on, and he’s out of this match!

Jeannie: In a pretty painful way, too…

Meanwhile, Tornado Jones is back to his feet, immediately heading over towards the downed Joe Ragnal, whose also beginning to rise back up. As he does, Jones immediately pulls him over by a leg, surprising the young man, then drops down for a Dragon Screw, sending Ragnal tumbling to the canvas with ease. He immediately grasps at his leg slightly, looking to be in pain. Jones then yanks him up by that same leg once again, only to drop back down and drive it into the canvas with a leg DDT, causing even more pain as Ragnal once more grasps at that extremity. Jones pushes back to his feet and looks on quite proudly, looking to cement his debut by eliminating the legendary member of the Ragnal clan. He then drops down and grabs ahold of that appendage once more, slapping on a rather painful legbar. Clearly Jones is looking to induce even more pain. Elsewhere, Coltrane and Jack Jupiter are brawling in the corner, the former with a clear advantage as he unleashes a furious barrage of forearms, Jupiter stumbling back with ease as he attempts to fire back with a few of his own, Coltrane feeling their own sting as well. Eventually he backs Jack up into the turnbuckle, then lunging in a second forearm. Jack however manages to duck underneath it, reversing their positions and now bombarding the mimic with some heavy forearms of his own, Coltrane grimacing a bit as he guards his face. Jupiter then quickly pulls him forward, then taking him down with a snap suplex! Coltrane grasps at his back, arching up off the mat in pain. The San Diego native flashes a cocky grin as he pushes back to his feet, now heading over and ascending the nearby turnbuckle. However in mid climb, the young man somehow gets his foot caught between the paddings, now looking down in annoyance. Quickly he begins trying to free himself from this predicament, yanking and tugging firmly on that foot of his to free it once more. Eventually he succeeds with a mighty yank, the force sending him tumbling over the ropes! Jupiter however barely manages to snatch the bottom rope on his way down, letting out a sigh of relief, his feet just inches away from the ground. He then quickly pulls himself back onto the ring apron and steps back into the ring. He returns just in time for Coltrane to deliver a Snap Suplex of his own, driving Jupiter hard into the canvas as he gasps out in pain. Coltrane then looks down at the foolish young man with anger, quickly ascending the turnbuckle himself and leaping off, coming down with his own version of the Jupitersault! He crashes down onto Jack, driving the air out of his chest and sending him grasping the area in pain, Coltrane meanwhile rolling off to the side as he takes another break.

Tom: Coltrane’s turning the heat up on Jack Jupiter, whose own Jupitersault has been turned against him!

Jeannie: That can’t help him any in the long run.

Gehenna meanwhile lunges in at a rising Paul Podanski, immediately assaulting him as well with a flurry of rampant forearms, the stout competitor wobbling a bit from these blows as he fights back with a few body shots to his bizarre opponent. Gehenna squints slightly from these, but continues to fire back, as Tornado Jones meanwhile still has Ragnal down in that legbar, the FUN Innovator grimacing in pain as he lunges out with foot and tries to boot him away. Tornado however leans backwards out of his reach, further demonstrating his accomplished technical prowess. Ragnal however continues to wriggles and squirm in his grip, desperate to escape now. Jones soon gets fed up with his wriggling opponent, now cradling him into his grip, keeping ahold of that leg as he does. He then quickly carries him over towards the nearby ropes, then quickly hoists him up high to throw him out. Ragnal however hangs on for dear life, grasping firmly onto that top rope. Tornado looks on with aggravation, angrily trying to shake the former Toolshed champion loose. Eventually he manages to do so, only to allow Joe to free his leg, wrapping them around Jones's neck and using his position to send him over the ropes! Jones quickly grabs hold of the top rope, looking rather surprised by this. He then suddenly lets go off said ropes as Ragnal rolls back into the ring and leaps up with a high enziguri, clipping him in the side of the head and completing his elimination! Jones drops to his knees and slaps the ground in frustration on the outside. Now only six men remain.

Jeannie: And Tornado Jones has been eliminated!

Tom: Not a bad debut for the man, but in a match like this, experience can give a pretty serious and much-needed edge, and with only six men left, that’s even more important now.

Ragnal rolls back to the ring, Paul and Constance joining him on one side of the ring, as Coltrane, Gehenna, and Jack Jupiter all congregrate on the other, as it seems we now have a stand off. The remaining men all lock eyes with one another, each man looking rather worn down from this lengthy battle. Soon, they all charge into the center of the ring, now exchanging a series of blows with one another, Coltrane going after Podanski, Ragnal targetting Constance, and Gehenna once again pursueing Jupiter, forearms, fists, feet, and even a few headbutts all being exchanged. Jupiter then lunges out and rakes Gehenna right across the eyes, the disturbing being yelping out in pain, as Jupiter then sends him off the ropes sends him bouncing off the ropes, then catching him as he comes back with a high Orbital Suplex! The lavender locked being hisses in pain, grasping at his back quite closely. Podanski and Coltrane meanwhile slug it out near one of the turnbuckles of the ring, both men looking determined to eliminate the other. Coltrane swings with a wild punch at his opponent's face, only for the man to duck, then grab him by the head and ram it into the top turnbuckle! He slumps forward against the turnbuckle and rubs at his face in pain, Podanski taking the opportunity to introduce the two them even further, constantly driving him into the top of it. And on the other side of the ring, Ragnal assaults Constance with a rapid flurry of kicks, battering his legs and sending the bigger man staggering even more. He then leaps up for a high dropkick, only for James to catch him in midair, cradling him in his grip and charging forward, driving him into the canvas with a running powerslam! Ragnal gasps out in pain, rolling along the mat. Constance sits up from nearby and takes another quick breath, before pushing back to his feet and yanking Ragnal up to his own. He then hoists him up high and carries him over to the ropes.

Tom: Things are getting seriously rough now.

Jeannie: And at the rate it’s at right now, it can only become even more dangerous of a match…

Jupiter meanwhile looks on with an eager grin on his face, rubbing his hands together as he waits for his opponent to rise back up. Gehenna soon manages to do so, just in time to grabbed once again, this time hoisted up in a musclebuster position. Jupiter than carries him over towards the nearby ropes, back facing them. Soon enough, he's at his destination, now starting to fall back, when suddenly the surprisingly flexible Gehenna bends down and delivers a pair of knees right to his complexion! Jack gasps out in pain, stumbling backwards a bit, as Gehenna then drops down and charges forward, leaping up and following with a second jumping knee to the face! Jupiter gets sents tumbling with ease over the ropes from the force, landing on the outside with a thump. Gehenna simply watches intently at his downed opponent, rubbing over his back a bit as he stands. Elsewhere, a thoroughly dazed Coltrane stumbles out of the corner, looking quite worse for the wear as Podanski grins widely. He then hoists Coltrane up, then bringing him back down swiftly with a Manhattan Drop, the mimic grasping near his legs in pain. Paul then bounces off the ropes and quickly comes back with a rather high flying clothesline for size, sending his opponent tumbling to the canvas once more! He then signals to the crowd, who begin cheering quite loudly, Coltrane staggering back to his feet now. Podanski then hoists him up high, setting up for a Paulerbomb to the outside! He then stomps over to deposit him, when suddenly someone, dressed in a filthy red baseball cap, ripped-up flannel jacket and familiar, black-marked grey wrestling pants leaps onto the ring apron, running along the side of the apron and rearing back, superkicking Paul Podanski’s head from over top the rope! The man turns himself around, his head leaned down and feet apart, swinging his right arm around in a clockwise motion with a finger pointing above his head as he lifts his head up, revealing himself to be Jason Hereford! In the ring, Podanski instantly drops Coltrane and staggers back, tumbling towards the mat as Coltrane lands on his feet behind him, catching the stunned Podanski from behind. Before Paul can do anything, much less recover, Coltrane suddenly hoists him up from behind, sending him tumbling to the outside quickly! He then drops back down to the canvas and looks at Hereford, puzzled at this turn of events. Jason looks at him, grinning as he points to the action inside the ring and drops down, to the outside of the ring, removing the jacket and hat before disappearing under the ring.*

Tom: What a heartbreaker for Paul Podanski, who had as good a shot as anyone in this match to pick up the win here tonight!

Jeannie: Yeah, but at least Jason’s here now…or maybe not.

Tom: I’m personally hoping that he stays under that ring and OUT of this match!

With four men remaining now, Constance can be seen trying to even the odds to three, trying to toss a stubborn Joe Ragnal as well over the ropes, the young man once again with a firm grasp on the top rope. He once again tries to pull him free, only for Ragnal to manage to shove him off with a stiff boot to the face, knocking Constance back, clutching at his jaw slightly. Ragnal then springs off the ropes and comes back, taking Constance down with a beautiful moonsault! The two men lie on the mat for a bit, as Coltrane and Gehenna both simply watch on for now, curious to see who gets the better of these two. Ragnal meanwhile pushes back to his feet, then reaching down and yanking Constance up with him, hands now locked around his head. He then quickly charges forward, springing off the nearby turnbuckle and setting up for the FUN Drop! Constance however manage to redirect him in mid air, throwing him off quickly! Joe looks on in surprise, now sent sailing high over the ropes and crashing to the outside! Constance hunches over and grasps at his chest, the match further taking it's toll on him. As soon as he does however, the remaining Gehenna and Coltrane quickly rush in, now beginning to bombard him with a series of furious forearms, Constance enduring these as he fires back with a series of his own two each man, though clearly he's in a bad position.

Tom: Joe Ragnal’s out of this match, unfortunately for him, but fortunately for the other three.

Jeannie: Maybe not for James Constance though, considering Coltrane and Gehenna are both working on him…heheh…

Tom: Don’t even think about it.

Coltrane and Gehenna quickly back him up into the turnbuckle, before whipping him full speed off to the one on the other side! Constance crashes chest first against it and gasps out in pain, falling to the canvas as he clutches at his midsection. Gehenna then hunches down and looks on intently, Coltrane now stepping into the center of the ring as he nods. The wild Gehenna then charges full speed, as Coltrane bends over and launches him with a backdrop, bringing the medical robe clad man atop Constance with a high Senton Splash! He yelps out in pain once more, rolling out from under his form as Gehenna rises up and quickly begins stomping furiously across that chest of his. As he does so however, Coltrane charges in from behind and grabs him by the neck, attempting to toss him to the outside! Gehenna however blocks it with a foot against the ropes, then rears back and headbutts Coltrane right in the face, sending the man staggering back in surprise. He then springs back and follows up with a straight kick to the face, laying Coltrane out for the moment and sending him tumbling off to the outside once more. He then turns his attention towards the downed Constance, eyes looking on with sick intent as he stomps towards him. The man then lunges snatches Constance's wrists firmly, setting him up for Splatter House! Constance however manages to roll backwards, sending him sailing with a monkey flip! Gehenna looks rather caught off guard by this, crashing into the canvas and hissing out in pain.

Jeannie: What a counter!

Tom: James Contsance is mustering everything that he has here tonight to keep in this match, and right now, it’s paying off!

The two men now lie on the canvas, attempting to recover. As they do however, Hereford can be seen skulking around the ring, a familiar briefcase clutched in his hands. He nods intently to himself, as he spots the downed Coltrane on the otherside. Hands drumming slowly along the surface of this face, as he quickly slides into the ring, then charging full speed at the two men now rising to their feet, intent on eliminating one or both of them with that case! Both Constance and Gehenna however seem to sense him coming somehow, the two men ducking down and dumping him to the outside with a fireman's carry! Hereford looks on in horror, crashing to the outside, complete with a face plant onto his case! The young man yelps out in pain, quickly grasping his features as he rolls desperately along the outside. Gehenna and Constance then hunch back up and eye one another, now beginning to exchange stiff fists with one another, both men on wobbly legs as they try to stand. Coltrane on the other hand is back to his own feet, rubbing at his face from that earlier kick still. He then watches as Constance and Gehenna both begin fighting towards him with these constant strikes, both men clearly wanting to stay away from the ropes at this point of the match. Coltrane charges over himself, now joining in their barrage pf attacks, now all three men angrily exchanging blows, Constance to Gehenna, Gehenna to Coltrane, and Coltrane right back to Constance. Eventually the three men all manage to lunge out with a trio of kicks to the stomach, all of them immediately doubling over in pain as they stagger away from each other. Coltrane makes his way over to the ropes, resting against them and taking a deep breath. Constance staggers over nearby himself, still grasping at his torso, while Gehenna rises back up, clearly the freshest of the three. He then eyes Constance and looks on quite closely, then charging full speed and leaping right at him with another high knee to the forehead! Constance however ducks out of the way at the last second, Gehenna instead connecting and sending Coltrane tumbling over the ropes to the outside! The crowd cheers loudly, the remaining Constance and Gehenna now eying each other intently. The two men then lunge in and once again begin exchanging blows. However unbeknownst to them, Hereford has somehow made his way over under the hanging Coltrane, a firm grip on his feet as he seperates them from the floor. Once again the enigmatic man looks down at him, as he struggles to get back into the ring. As he does, the man actually boots Hereford in the face, sending him tumbling along the ground and grasping his face once more in pain. As he does though, Coltrane manages to sucessfully skin the cat and return to the ring.

Tom: Again, Jason Hereford gets involved in this match to save his ally from a possible elimination. Only this time, he got what he deserved…

Jeannie: The eternal gratitude and friendship of Coltrane?

Tom: Not really what I was thinking…

Meanwhile, Constance and Gehenna continue to battle it out amongst each other, completely unaware of Coltrane's survival. The two once again near the ropes, now grabbing another firmly and attempting to toss each other to the outside. However as they do so, Coltrane suddenly dashes over, grabbing them both from behind and hoisting them over the ropes and out of the ring! Coltrane then turns around and looks on with a very satisfied look in his eyes, turning around and taking a few deep breaths to recover from this constant battle. As he has his back turned however, he's suddenly rolled up from behind! A referee on the outside quickly slides in, making the count! 1.......2.......3!

Tom: CONSTANCE WITH THE ROLLUP! CONSTANCE WITH THE ROLLUP!

Jeannie: What a way to win the match!

It's over! Coltrane looks on in absolute shock as he breaks free, now seated on the canvas as he grasps the side of his head. Standing behind meanwhile is the triumphant winner... James Magnum Constance.

Finkel: Here is your winner... who will move on to the title match later tonight, James Magnum Constance!

The crowd looks a bit confused, wondering what just happened. We immediately cut to a replay on the Colvintron, showing Constance and Gehenna both tumbling to the outside, but Gehenna hitting the ground first, with Constance landing atop his back, barely managing to keep his feet off the ground. We then see him rise up, eye Coltrane from the outside, then slip in behind and roll him up for the victory. We then cut back to a furious Coltrane, who begins pounding the mat in unbridled fury, upset that he was foolish, his ally rolling into the ring, one hand clutching the handle of his briefcase and another hand over his face, unaware of what had just taken place. Gehenna meanwhile slowly hunches up on the outside, gazing intently inside of the ring, then quickly making his exit from the ringside area. Constance meanwhile pushes back to his feet, the referee now raising his arm high into the air. He looks quite pleased with his victory, looking to be quite worn down after this lengthy battle. Clearly, he's ready to take a rest so he'll be ready later on for his title shot. As he stands in the center of the ring, Coltrane slowly slinks out from the outside, a dazed Jason Hereford following him, Coltrane absolutely disgusted by this recent failure of his as he quickly slips to the backstage area.

Tom: There you go, ladies and gentlemen! James Constance has managed to survive—by the skin of his teeth, no less—and outlast all others involved, despite everything else that has happened here!

We cut back to Constance as he once again celebrates in the ring, still breathing rather heavily as he stands. The young man then rolls to the outside, quickly gathering up his belongings. He then holds up his hands in victory once more before making his way to the back as well.

Jeannie: Not to mention, he’s got almost the rest of the night to rest and prep for his upcoming match with the Blazing Path champion, Vin Beverly…mmmmm…

Tom: And with that, everyone, we now shall lead in to our second match of the evening…

We then quickly cut to the next segment.

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

*A remixed version of Nelly Furtado's "Maneater" starts to play in the W*I*G-Sphere. After a short while, Fannie Package appears on the stage, looking bigger & harder than ever. Fannie is sporting a black crop-top with the word "ENFORCER" printed on it in bold white letters. She's also wearing leather booty shorts & boots that go halfway up her enormous calves. Looking closely, one can see that, due to the size of her leg muscles, Fannie was unable to actually zip the boots all the way up. Instead, they are rolled down so as to seem more presentable. Fannie stands with both arms outstretched, holding one of her two Championship belts in each hand.*

Howard Finkel: Ladies & Gentlemen, please welcome the Special Guest Enforcer for this match... The Undisputed Wrestling' Innovative Genesis Women's Champion... FAN~NIE PACK~AAAAAAGE!

Jeannie: Fannie Package is looking even more buff than usual this evening.

Tom: Not that you usually notice that sort of thing, right?

Jeannie: Maybe I should ask her for a few diet tips is all.

Tom: You can start by not eating a damn bucket of fried chicken every night!

Jeannie: Hey, I'm supposed to be the one who comes up with the zingers!

*After The Fink makes his introduction, Fannie allows her two belts to slide down her arms to the point where they are resting on her shoulders. She strikes a Double Biceps pose, followed by a Lat Spread & Most Muscular, a burst of gold pyro accompanies each pose, silhouetting her massive imposing physique with each pose. Her small posing routine complete, Fannie makes her way on down the ramp, slapping hands with her fans & supporters before laying both her belts on the announce desk infront of Tom & Jeannie. Fannie stays at ringside, waving & blowing kisses to the audience.*

The Fink: Introducing first, standing 5 foot, 6 inches tall, weighing in at 135 pounds, from Cygnus A,...MOLLY RINGWORM!

*The crowd cheers as "Spaceman" begins to play and Molly makes her way through the curtain. She gives a quick wave to either side of the audience before sprinting down to the ring. She slides underneath the bottom rope and backs into her corner, where she crouches low to the ground and awaits the arrival of her opponent. She sports a little grin and drums her fingers anxiously on the mat.*

Tom: Molly Ringworm looks very focused tonight, she is well aware of what is at stake here.

Jeannie: I guess a potential title shot and coming out on top of this rivalry is enough to give even a nut case like this some clarity!

*Cruachan's "Brown Bull of Cooley" begins to blare through the speakers in the W*I*G-Sphere & the audience begins a collective boo. After approximately 30 seconds of the music, Maeve O'Hare struts out onto the stage, unusually solo this evening, & the jeers of the crowd only increase. Maeve looks around with a sneer before raising her arms in an elegant Double Biceps pose as the Green, White & Gold pyro explodes behind her.*

The Fink: And introducing her opponent, standing 6 feet tall, weighing in at 232lbs, from Derry City, Northern Ireland... MAEVE O~HAAAAAAAARE!

Tom: It's quite unusual to see any member of Team ireland out here alone.

Jeannie: With so many hot guys on that team I can't understand why Maeve would choose to come out here alone!

*Maeve does her best to ignore the sound as she makes her way on down the aisle. She clambers up the ring-steps & into the ring. Maeve glares across at Molly who seems to be spinning around & around in a circle for some reason. Maeve scales a ring-post & points down at Fannie Package who looks up, slightly unimpressed, even as Maeve flexes one of her own massive arms.*

Tom: That may be the reason right there. 290lbs of Fannie Package. There's no way she would allow Coach O'Hare, or any of Maeve's team-mates to stick there nose into this match & screw over Molly Ringworm.

DING-DING!

*Molly & Maeve stand directly across from each other. Maeve rolls her neck & cracks her knuckles as she eyes up her smaller opponent. Molly looks more focussed than in any of their previous encounters. Molly takes a reassuring glance outside the ring to see Fannie Package standing there. Maeve, conversely, looks out of the ring with an air of nervousness. Both women lunge at each other, locking up in a Collar & Elbow Tie-Up. Eventually, Maeve manages to over-power Molly & begins to force her back towards the ropes. The referee orders a break & Maeve complies, holding her hands up & acting as if she's about to back off before she slugs Molly right in the jaw. Molly goes down as the ref gives off to Maeve. Maeve rolls her eyes at the ref's commands as she backs off a little. Molly starts to get up again, using the ropes as a means of support, but Maeve charges right at Molly & Clotheslines her over the top. Molly falls to the outside & Maeve goes out after her. Molly gets back up again just as Maeve approaches. Molly hits Maeve a few digs in the stomach & clambers up onto the ring apron. Maeve looks up just as Molly performs a Flipping Senton off the apron & on-top of her.*

Jeannie: Molly manages to catch Maeve by surprise with that Flipping Senton!

Tom: That's exactly the kind of strategy that Molly needs to employ against a powerhouse like Maeve.

*Molly drags Maeve back to a standing position again & whips her towards the security rail but Maeve manages to reverse the whip & sends Molly crashing back-first into the railing. Maeve follows up by echoing a move she did earlier, Clotheslining Molly over the railing & into the audience. Maeve rolls back into the ring to break the referee's count-out before marching over to the announce table. She shoves The Fink off his chair & takes the seating implement to the area of the barricade that she just dumped Molly over. Fannie approaches Maeve with a view to taking the steel chair off her, until Maeve props the chair up in such a position as one might sit on it. With Molly starting to get up again, Maeve quickly grabs her in a Front Facelock & takes her over the railing & back to ringside with a monstrous looking Suplex. Once again, Maeve rolls in under the bottom rope & right back out again. She sets Molly up on the chair & the crowd are chanting in anticipation already.*

"OOOOOLÉ! OLÉ! OLÉ! OLÉ! OOOOOLÉÉÉÉÉÉ! OOOOOLÉÉÉÉÉÉ!"

*Maeve takes a run-up to where Molly is propped up sitting on the chair & blasts her with a huge boot to the face. Molly falls to the floor as Fannie Package can do little but look on.*

Tom: What an absolutely brutal Olé Kick! Molly Ringworm might just be completely knocked out!

*Maeve mocks Fannie by picking up her now limp opponent & pressing her overhead. Maeve pumps Molly up & down a few times before tossing her back into the ring between the middle & bottom ropes. Maeve flexes her left arm, pointing out her huge bicep to Fannie before Ms. Package orders her back into the ring. Maeve turns back towards the ring only to get both of Molly's feet straight in her mush! Maeve stumbles back towards the security rail & Molly comes sailing over the top rope with a Plancha. Maeve ducks out of the way at the last instant & Molly crashes stomach-first onto the rail. Maeve reaches over & grabs Molly's head, throwing her back onto the floor. Maeve brings Molly up to her feet again & rolls her back into the ring. Maeve follows afterwards. Maeve places her foot on Molly's chest & points out towards Fannie with one arm as she flexes with the other. Unsurprisingly, Molly is able to kick out of this most lackadaisical of pins. With Molly still on the mat, Maeve drops down to her knees, driving her shin into Molly's throat. Maeve stays in this position, choking Molly out before the referee orders her off. Maeve stands up as Molly gasps for air. Maeve backs off after giving Molly an unnecessarily brutal stomp.*

Tom: Maeve just seems to be completely dominating Molly at the moment.

Jeannie: "Seems" nothing! She's totally dominating Molly! Even without her father at her side, Maeve O'Hare is still a decidedly dangerous individual.

*Molly grasps at her throat, sputtering & coughing as Maeve leans back against the ropes, flipping her hair back slightly. Molly begins to stand again & Maeve crouches down, as if stalking her. Molly gets to her feet & Maeve charges straight towards her, aiming for a Spear. Molly does a Cartwheel to avoid the move & Maeve's meaty shoulder collides with the ring-post. Molly takes advantage of this momentary distraction & attempts a roll-up on Maeve.*

1...





2...





KICKOUT!

Tom: Molly Ringworm with that amazing pin attempt. Proving Maeve is not quite in control of the match as she'd like to think.

*Maeve glares at Molly who tilts her head to the side a little as she looks back at Maeve. Maeve stands again & walks in the direction of Molly. Maeve butts her smaller opponent forward with her chest, slowly causing Molly to back up. As soon as Maeve backs Molly into a corner she stomps on Miss Ringworm's toes. The pain is enough to keep Molly sufficiently distracted for a moment. Maeve then shoves Molly back into the corner & begins to pound her with lefts & rights before nailing her with an extremely brutal headbutt right to the centre of Molly's face. Maeve tosses her hair back again & sees that Molly is now busted wide open (Bah Gawd!). Blood is pouring out of Molly's nose, right where Maeve head-butted her. Maeve sets Molly up on the top rope & climbs the ropes herself to join her up on the top. Maeve hooks both of Molly's arms.*

Tom: The Celtic Tiger Driver! She's about to finish Molly off!

Jeannie: With the rate that blood is pouring out of Molly's nose, she's at risk of passing out from blood-loss before Maeve even completes the move!

*Maeve tries to jump off the ropes with Molly, but Molly has hooked her feet in just under the top rope. Molly manages to drive her own head into Maeve's abdomen, driving the wind out of the huge Irishwoman. As Maeve is caught off-guard, Molly shoves her from the top rope & follows up with a top rope Elbow Drop.*

Tom: Molly manages to find a way to counter & now Maeve's on the receiving end of a top rope Elbow!

*Molly makes her way around to Maeve & tries intertwining one of Maeve's legs with her own. Maeve manages to fight this off & shoves Molly off to the ropes. Molly slips outside & stands on the apron. She hurls herself back in & nails Maeve with a Crossbody. Molly tries to turn the situation into a pinning predicament...*

1...





2...





KICKOUT!

Jeannie: Twice now Molly has nearly pinned Maeve! The big gal from Derry needs to step things up a little bit!

*Molly immediately stands again & hits Maeve with a Dropkick just as Maeve was getting up to a knee. Molly attempts a Somersault Leg Drop, but Maeve moves aside & Molly lands flat on her ass. Maeve takes a small step back & nails Molly with a kick to the face & chest that would make Ronan O'Gara proud. Maeve quickly positions herself behind Molly, trying to lock in a Cobra Clutch & set her up for a "Cooley Cattle Drive", but Molly keeps fighting her off, trying to resist. Maeve manages to catch Molly in something of a Sleeper Hold & bring her to her feet. Molly drops back down & takes Maeve out with a modified Stunner. Molly shakes her head a little bit to get her bearings, waiting on Maeve to stand again. Maeve gets back to her feet again & Molly bounds off the nearest set of ropes, aiming for the "ESP". But Maeve has the move scouted & manages to take Molly back with a modified Backdrop Suplex. Both women lay on the mat, unmoving.*

Tom: Ouch! That looked ugly!

Jeannie: No kidding! Both women taking a bad landing on that exchange.

*The referee is starting to count the pair of wrestlers down. There's barely a sign that either woman has anything left other than their rapidly rising & falling chests. Neither seems ready to get stuck back into the match for a while. Maeve rolls over onto her stomach & begins crawling towards the ropes. She slinks out under the bottom rope & leans back against the announce desk. She picks up both of Fannie Package's Championship belts & slides one into the ring. The referee makes a move over to retrieve the belt & Maeve attempts to enter with the other belt. She is halted by Fannie Package who holds one end of the GND Title. A Tug-O-War ensues between the two strongest women in W*I*G. Neither one is going to relenquish her grip on the belt.*

Tom: Given the power of these two women they could well rip that leather belt in two.

Jeannie: Y'know, there is supposed to be a match going on Maeve!

*Fannie suddenly decides to let go of the belt & Maeve goes sprawling backwards into the ring steps with a loud clatter. The referee, having just disposed of the W*I*G Women's Championship belt, turns to see Maeve laying in a heap next to the ring steps with Fannie Package towering over her. The ref demands to know what happened. Maeve tries to plead her case that Fannie shoved her back into the steps. The referee admonishes Fannie & seems close to dismissing her. Fannie steps into the ring to remind the referee why she's there. Maeve, meanwhile, watches this drama unfold with a smirk on her face. Maeve herself gets into the ring, hanging back in a corner as the referee continues his dispute with Fannie. Fannie approaches Maeve, the referee standing in the middle of these two immense women. When the referee's back is turned to Maeve, the Irishwoman makes several obscene gestures. Fannie makes a lunge towards Maeve, referee be damned. The two huge women collide, with the poor tiny official caught in the middle of them! The referee is crushed!*

Tom: OW! That guy didn't deserve that!

Jeannie: I don't know. Squashed in between Maeve & Fannie... Mmmmm...

Tom: Errrr... Anyway! The match! Get back to the damn match!

*Maeve drags the unconscious ref from out between herself & Fannie & discards his prone form outside the ring with a Gorilla Press Slam. Meanwhile, Molly Ringworm, who has been watching all this unfold, inserts herself back into the action, attacking Maeve with a Flying Forearm to the back of the head. Maeve returns her attention to her original antagonist as medical personnel come rushing from the back to attend to the referee.*

Tom: They're bringing stretchers out for that guy? Their just women! Not like he fell off a cliff!

Jeannie: At least the two girls remembered why they're out here in the first place!

*Fannie is told by a backstage agent to take over the duty of officiating the match. Fannie is a bit unsure, but agrees to do so anyway. Maeve now keeps her eyes peeled on both the other women in the ring. She makes a move to Clothesline Molly, but Molly manages to duck the move & catches Maeve with three rapid jabs in succession before finishing off the combo with a Discus Clothesline! Molly hurriedly climbs to the top rope and nails Maeve with a Somersault Leg Drop, her foot landing directly on her foes face!*

Tom: This could be it!

1...

2...

...No, it wasn't enough! Molly drags her hands through her hair, staining some of the orange locks dark red in the process. Undaunted, Molly grabs one of Maeve's arms and wraps her up into a La Magistral Cradle, another pinning predicament!

1...

2...

...Shoulder up! Both women are back to their feet and Maeve throws a wild swing. Molly is able to duck the incoming limb and swiftly catch O'Hare with a Side Effect! She goes for another pin!

1...

2...

...Still not enough!*

Tom: That was three near falls in a row but none of them were enough to keep Maeve down!

Jeannie: Ha! Maeve is a machine! Molly just doesn't have what it takes to get the job done!

*Molly questions the count by newly appointed referee Fannie Package assures her that it was only a 2-count. Molly falls onto her back in anguish, trying to figure out just what to do to win this match. Molly returns to her feet and begins to scale the top rope, soon making it to the top. But Maeve has gotten to her feet as well and climbs up after her. After a brief struggle, Maeve over powers her rival and tosses her down to the mat. Maeve is now positioned on the top rope and she glares down at the fallen form of her opponent. Without warning, she leaps downwards and crashes down onto Molly with a Top Rope Splash!*

Tom: A Top Rope Splash from Maeve O'Hare?! I don't think I've ever seen her do that!

Jeannie: That's a rarity, for sure! And I think it turned Ringworm into a pancake!

*Molly has the wind driven out of her and Maeve hooks both legs after letting out a sigh of air

1...

2...

.....KICK OUT?!*

Jeannie: How in the HELL did she just kick out of THAT?!

*The crowd is doubly stunned by Maeve's aerial maneuver and the fact that Molly kicked out of it. Maeve looks quite annoyed as she drags Molly upwards and just as soon sends her back down with an elementary Body Slam. But when it's done by someone with such a size advantage, it's quite devastating. Maeve wastes no time trying to lock in a Dragon Sleeper, that Molly tries with all her strength to wiggle free of. A few elbow strikes to the ribs stops her movements while her gangly body goes limp. Maeve locks in the move and drops to one knee, adding extra pressure. Molly's already bendy body is contorted into an awkward position. *

Tom: This could very well be the end for Molly Ringworm, here. We're not seeing a lot of movement from her at the moment.

Jeannie: She's totally limp! It's academic at this point!

*Fannie grabs one of Molly's arms, lifts it up and it drops quickly. She signals to the crowd that it was the first occurrence. She lifts her arm once more and once more it hangs down. Fannie displays a pair of fingers for the audience. Molly's wrist is lifted for a third time while Maeve continues to crank back on the hold. It's dropped but this time the arm stops halfway from dropping! The crowd roars in approval! Molly eventually begins to stand, and Maeve follows suit. She wraps a free arm backwards and around Maeve's neck, locking it in as tight as she can. Ringworm suddenly flips backwards, looking to complete the Backstabber portion of her ESP but Maeve makes a quick sprint forward to avoid that from happening. Molly lands on her feet but is quickly booted in the gut, sending her through the middle rope and outside of the ring*

Tom: A very valiant by Molly but as she gets some even ground, Maeve kicks her right back down each time.

Jeannie: And Maeve looks pretty content with a count out victory! That'd be pretty humiliating for ol' Ringworm!

*Fannie begins to count while Maeve poses and shows off her muscles, the unified champ doing her best to ignore this. At the count of five, Molly begins to stir and crawls towards the apron. At seven she climbs upwards onto it, using the ropes for support. Maeve leans against the ropes before taking off in a sprint, looking to kick Molly's head off with a kick. However, Molly narrowly ducks at the last second and Maeve's leg is snagged over the top rope. With her back facing Maeve, Molly quickly locks in a front face-lock. From the apron, she flips backwards and over Maeve and into the ring. She connects with a Backstabber and completes the ESP!*

Tom: ESP! ESP! FROM THE RING APRON!

*Molly winces but quickly crawls over for a pin while Fannie dives for the count!

1..

2..

3!!*

Tom: Molly wins! Out of nowhere! And after taking such a monstrous beating!

Jeannie: What?! I can't believe it!

*And neither can the audience apparently as they rise to their feet and cheer!*

The Fink: Here is your winner...MOLLLYYYYY RINGWORM!

*Molly is helped to her feet by Fannie, who raises one of her arms while blood drips from her face*

Tom: An amazing contest to wrap up what was an amazing rivalry between these two! Maeve O'Hare absolutely punished Molly from pillar to post but she held on to a secure a victory!

Jeannie: Yeah, well, now Fannie's looking right at her next opponent, the new number one contender!

*Molly backs away and leans against the ropes, catching a much needed breather while Fannie applauds the efforts of her future opponent*

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

Howard Finkel: The following contest, scheduled for one fall, is a handicap match.

*Damien Blood’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=_z-hEyVQDRA

Finkel: Introducing first, coming down the aisle, at 6 feet, weighing in at 240 pounds, from Tokyo, Japan—DAMIEN BLOOD.

*Damien comes out to the boos of the crowd. He has a devilish grin on his face. Damien is wearing a red headband, a red kimono robe, green tights in a reptilian scale design, blood red wrist tape, and black boots with a red cross on. He walks down to the ring and enters it. Damien takes off his robe and headband and hands them to the timekeeper on the outside. Then, he moves over to the corner and starts untying the top turnbuckle cover.*

Tom Bailey: Here comes Damien Blood, and he’s gonna have a challenge on his hands having to deal with TNT and Nicole Michaels.

Jeannie Lawless: I think he can handle them.

Tom: What makes you say that?

Jeannie: He looks focused. He looks driven. And, he looks mad as hell at what happened to him with that barrel.

Tom: Well, we’ll just have to see.

*TNT’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCX8gDW4YS0

Finkel: Introducing first, coming down the aisle, at a combined weight of 372 pounds, from The Southwest—Toby Nicholas Tucker and Nicole Michaels, TNT.

*TNT and Nicole come out to the boos of the crowd. TNT is wearing that black noseguard for his injured nose, white wrestling tights with “TNT” in white down the legs and a flame design on the legs, white wrist tape, and black cowboy boots with a fire design on them. He also has that horseshoe tied to a rope around his neck. Nicole has on a pink top and skirt with a flame design on them and “TNT” in white on the back and front and pink boots with “TNT” in white on them. They walk down to the ring as pyro goes off behind them. They walk up the steps and onto the apron. TNT holds open the ropes and Nicole passes through them. TNT follows. Suddenly, Damien charges at them and starts punching on TNT. The ref quickly calls for the bell.*

Tom: Looks like you may be right, Jeannie. Damien Blood wastes no time, going right after TNT!

Jeannie: Damien does have a chance, but he still has to contend with two people.

*TNT and Damien punch each other in the corner. Suddenly, Nicole jumps onto Damien’s back and scratches at his eyes. This causes Damien to stagger back a little and allows TNT to get the upper hand, punching him out of the corner. TNT then stops to take off the horseshoe necklace, throwing it to the ground. As he does this, Nicole slips off of Damien, grabs his arm and holds them behind his back. TNT unleashes a flurry of punches onto Damien as the referee tries to pull Nicole off of Damien and get her to get onto the apron. TNT pushes the ref away. However, this allows Damien flip Nicole over, sending her crashing onto TNT. He staggers back into the corner while Nicole hits the mat. Damien turns around, picks up Nicole, and throws her into TNT. Then, he backs up, charges at the corner, and squashes both Nicole and TNT in the corner with a Stinger splash.*

Tom: Damien Blood holding his own in the opening minutes of this match.

Jeannie: See, I told you so.

Tom: The match just began. Anything can happen between now and the end.

Jeannie: Yeah, anything can happen, like Damien Blood winning.

*Damien grabs Nicole and pulls her away from the corner. TNT remains in the corner, getting a breather. Meanwhile, Damien wraps his arm around Nicole’s neck and hits her with a DDT. Then, he gets up, picks up Nicole, and bends her over for a piledriver. However, before he can drop Nicole to the mat, TNT rushes out of the corner and hits Damien with a bicycle kick. Damien falls to the mat. TNT checks on Nicole. She tells him that she’s fine and to go after Damien. Damien gets up but not for long; TNT charges at him and hits him with a running big boot. Damien falls to the mat. TNT yells at Nicole. She turns around as TNT grabs Damien by his legs; she understands what TNT is going for. TNT catapults Damien up, and Nicole charges at him and hits him with a leg lariat.*

Tom: Hand Grenade to Damien Blood!

Jeannie: Then again, maybe the numbers game will overwhelm him.

*Nicole gets up and moves onto the apron. TNT picks up Damien and hits him with a few European uppercuts. Then, he kicks Damien in the stomach, grabs him, and lifts him up for a suplex. TNT holds him for a good minute and then drops him to the mat. TNT quickly gets up, picks up Damien, puts him onto his shoulders, and spins him around in an airplane spin. TNT spins him around and around and around and around for good two minutes. Then, he suddenly flips over, sending Damien to the mat with a rolling fireman’s carry slam. TNT sits up, shaking his head. Then, he quickly covers Damien for a pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*Damien kicks out.*

Tom: TNT showing some good offense, but Damien kicks out of his first pin attempt.

Jeannie: Smart move by TNT. He let all the blood go to Damien’s head with the delayed vertical suplex and then put him in that airplane spin. He’s keeping Damien discombobulated.

*TNT gets up and stomps on Damien a few times. Then, he grabs Damien’s legs and swings him around. TNT keeps swinging around and around and around and around for a good minute. Then, he lets go, and Damien goes flying and hits the mat near the ropes. TNT tries to walk over to him, but all that spinning has made him dizzy. He even falls to his knees, landing on the second rope near his corner. Nicole walks over to him and slaps his face a few times to help him get his bearings. Meanwhile, Damien grabs the ropes to pull himself up. TNT sees this and quickly jumps up. Even though he’s dizzy, he’s able to hit Damien with an elbow strike. Damien falls back against the ropes. TNT grabs him and whips him across the ring. Damien bounces off the opposite ropes. TNT walks to Damien, grabs him, hits him with a tilt-a-whirl gutbuster, grabs his arms, and hits Damien with a Russian leg sweep.*

Tom: Light My Fire! TNT hits Damien Blood with the Flammable Material!

Jeannie: Really? Light My Fire!?

Tom: What? I thought it was a nice Doors reference that tied into TNT’s fire theme.

Jeannie: It’s just too obvious.

*TNT gets up and picks up Damien. He quickly whips him into a neutral corner. TNT charges at the corner and hits Damien with a splash. He hits Damien with a few European uppercuts. Then, TNT moves away from the corner, walking all the way to the opposite corner. TNT then charges at Damien going for a running big boot. However, Damien ducks and TNT just gets caught onto the top turnbuckle. TNT tries to move away from the corner, but Damien quickly gets up, turns around, grabs TNT’s leg, and throws him over the top rope and to the outside. TNT falls onto the floor, but he quickly gets up onto his knees. Damien then climbs onto the top turnbuckle, hoping to jump off onto TNT with a flying move. Unfortunately for Damien, Nicole sneaks into the ring, sneaks up behind him, grabs him, and pushes him off the turnbuckle. Damien goes flying off and lands onto the guardrail.*

Tom: Hello Kitty! Nicole Michaels sneaks up onto Damien Blood and throws him off into the guardrail.

Jeannie: Rookie mistake from Damien. If you going to wrestle multiple opponents, then you’ve got to keep you eyes open on both of them.

*The ref quickly runs over to Nicole and yells at her. Nicole feigns innocence. TNT meanwhile looks around sees what has transpired. He gives a look to Nicole, telling her to keep the ref distracted. She sees it and understands; she starts arguing with the referee. TNT then gets up, walks over to where his horseshoe fell, and grabs it. Then, he turns around and sees Damien getting up. TNT quickly charges at Damien and hits him with an elbow strike to the back of the head. Then, he grabs Damien and throws him stomach first into the ring apron. Damien falls to the floor. TNT charges at Damien and hits him in the head with the horseshoe. Damien falls over onto his hands and knees. TNT then moves behind Damien, wraps the rope tied to the horseshoe, and chokes him with it. Damien thrashes around and tries to get the rope off of his neck.*

Tom: Dammit to hell! TNT has hit Damien with his horseshoe and is now choking Damien with the rope tied to it! And, the ref can’t do a thing about it because Nicole Michaels has him distracted.

Jeannie: I can’t really get to upset about this since it’s happening to Damien Blood.

Tom: I know, but still!

*TNT picks up Damien while still choking him and then flings him back first into the guardrail. Then, TNT grabs Damien and throws him back into the ring. Nicole finally stops arguing with the ref and pounces on Damien with several stomps. The referee yells at her to stop, but Nicole just facepalms him. TNT reenters and yells at Nicole to pick Damien up. She does and holds him up. TNT then charges at Damien, going for a bicycle kick. Unfortunately, Damien ducks; and TNT hits Nicole. The audience picks up, cheering a little bit for this. TNT immediately drops down to check on Nicole. Then, his face turns red with anger. TNT gets up and turns his attention to Damien. He charges at Damien as he gets up, but Damien is able to catch him with a backdrop driver.*

Tom: Sickle-Cell Anemia saves Damien Blood from the wrath of TNT.

Jeannie: It’s amazing how sexy TNT looks when he’s angry.

Tom: I was wondering where your libido went.

Jeannie: I can’t be thinking about sex all the time, Tom. Most of the time, yes, but not all of the time.

*Damien gets up. So does Nicole. She looks a little daze, which allows Damien to sneak up behind her. He grabs her and hits her with a torture rack powerbomb.*

Tom: Bloodshed to Nicole Michaels. Amazingly, Damien Blood has managed to turn this match around in his favor.

Jeannie: Is that really so shocking?

Tom: Yes.

Jeannie: How come?

Tom: Well, he was pushed onto the guardrail and got hit in the head with that horseshoe.

Jeannie: Well, I guess it’s amazing that he was able to overcome those attacks.

*Damien gets up and exits the ring. He walks over to the timekeeper’s area and grabs a chair. Suddenly, the referee exits the ring and gets into Damien’s face. He tells him to not bring the chair into the match or else he’ll be disqualified. Damien looks at the chair and then at the ref and then at the chair and then at the ref. Then, Damien suddenly hits the ref with a judo chop. The ref falls to the floor, and Damien reenters the ring.*

Tom: What the hell was the meaning of that?

Jeannie: Well, this thing has broken down.

Tom: I can’t believe Damien would do that.

Jeannie: I can. I doubt he came into this match expecting to win but expecting to inflict some damage to TNT and Nicole Michaels.

*Damien holds up the chair, waiting for TNT to get up. He does. Suddenly, the crowd perks up as L. Rey runs down from the ramp. He jumps onto the apron, jumps onto the top rope, jumps off, and hits TNT with La Espada De Damocles (Springboard forearm strike). The crowd cheers loudly as L. Rey rips the noseguard off of TNT and punches the hell out of TNT’s head. Damien looks confused.*

Tom: What the hell!?

Jeannie: L. Rey!? What is he doing here!?

Tom: I thought he was still injured!

Jeannie: What in the hell is going on?

*L. Rey keeps punching the hell out of TNT. Suddenly, Damien swings the chair and hits L. Rey in the back. He falls to the mat. The confusion on Damien’s face has turned to anger. He yells at L. Rey “HE’S MINE, DAMMIT!” Then, he drops the chair down onto L. Rey and yells “MINE!” Damien then hits L. Rey with the chair again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”) and again (“MINE!”). Damien finally stops. He turns around, only to have Nicole send the chair into his face with a roundhouse kick. The crowd cheers as Damien falls to the mat.*

Tom: Holy Hell! Nicole Michaels just kicked that chair right into Damien’s face!

Jeannie: I’m confused! Why did Damien attack L. Rey? Shouldn’t they be teaming up since they both hate TNT?

Tom: I guess Damien wants TNT to himself.

Jeannie: Well, I can’t say that I blame him.

*Nicole walks over to TNT to see if he’s okay. She helps him up, and he nods that he’s fine. Then, TNT turns his attention to L. Rey. He walks over and picks L. Rey up as Nicole grabs the chair from Damien. TNT holds L. Rey, and Nicole jabs the chair right into his ribs. The crowd boos loudly as L. Rey falls to his knees in pain. Nicole hands the chair to TNT, and he hits L. Rey in the back with the chair. He then hits L. Rey with the chair again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again. TNT throws the chair down. He then picks up L. Rey, puts him onto his shoulders, and hits him with a reverse thrown F-5 into a forward Russian leg sweep onto the chair. TNT and Nicole exit the ring, leaving Damien and L. Rey knocked out in the ring and the crowd booing them as they leave.*

Tom: Son of a bitch! Dynamite to L. Rey onto the chair after he was repeatedly beaten with it.

Jeannie: Well, I doubt this is what L. Rey had in mind when he came down here for revenge.

Tom: I don’t know what’s gonna happen next, but I can tell you that TNT and Nicole will probably regret what they’ve done tonight once Damien and L. Rey get a hold of them.

Jeannie: I seriously doubt it. *pause* Them regretting what they’ve done, not Damien and L. Rey getting a hold of them. This is far from over.

*Cut to a commercial for the latest TigerPath show.*

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

Finkel: The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall. Introducing first…

*"Unleash Me" by The RZA plays, as Fido walks out, with Mr. Faulkner following close by. Fido keeps walking down the ramp, only stopping to snarl at some of the fans at ringside. Some small children can be see scurrying to their mothers' sides as Fido makes his entrance.*

Finkel: From Rennes, France, weighing in tonight at 210 pounds, being led to the ring by Mr. Faulkner, FIIIII~DOOOOO!

Tom: Fido is still a relative newcomer here to W*I*G, but he's already made a considerable impact on the promotion.

Jeannie: Yeah, after Mr. Faulkner issued an open challenge, well, that idiot Gigantor Maximus accepted it.

Tom: That may have been slightly foolhardy on Gigantor's part, but I don't think for a second that Fido's going to have an easy time with the largest man in professional wrestling!

Jeannie: You're still running with that, huh?

*Fido stops outside the ring, as Faulkner grabs his collar. Faulkner removes it, and sends Fido into the ring. Fido crawls in and walks into his corner. Fido's music fades out only to be replaced by the pounding sounds of "China White".*

*The dry-ice is pumped out as the lights focus at the top of the ramp. Gigantor stomps out with his chain on & the audience can't help but giggle a little bit.*

Finkel: And his opponent, from The Land of the Giants, standing Seven Feet, Eleven Inches tall, weighing in at five hundred & seventy-eight pounds... GIGAN~TOOOOOOOORR... MAAAAAAAAX~IIIII~MUUUUUS!

*Gigantor continues to stomp his way down the ramp as Fido looks on, slightly confused. He looks out to Faulkner who gives a nod & Fido takes off!*

Tom: Wait a second, what's going on here?

*Fido quickly dashes up the ramp & he manages to catch Gigantor. Fido nails Gigantor with a particularly stiff looking chop*

DING-DING!

Jeannie: Did Faulkner just sic Fido on Gigantor?

Tom: Seems like it, as Fido just goes right after Gigantor!

*Fido continues to rain stiff blows & kicks on Gigantor's body until he drags him down to the ring. Fido removes Gigantor's chain & tosses it out of the ring. Gigantor, slightly dazed by the quickness & brutality of Fido's attack, takes a swing at his opponent that misses by an absolute mile. Fido takes the opportunity to blast Gigantor with an Enzuguiri. Gigantor stumbles about for a moment while Fido stalks him, a few steps back, two the left & Fido comes charging at Gigantor, nailing him with a perfect Shining Wizard. The impact of this move sends some blood & teeth flying from Gigantor's mouth!*

Tom: Looks like it didn't take long for Fido to deal with Gigantor...

Jeannie: Yeah, big surprise. Hey, look at this.

*Fido makes the cover on Gigantor...*

1...





2...





SHOULDER UP?

*Fido pulls one of Gigantor's shoulders up off the mat. He's not quite finished yet.

Tom: That's not a good sign for the giant.

Fido drags Gigantor over to a corner & begins doling out several very painful looking chops & kicks to Gigantor's mid-section. "The Largest Man in W*I*G" is shocked back into consciousness as he tries to cover up his reddening torso, Fido continues to beat at Gigantor's body before delivering a final kick to his head. Gigantor slumps over. Fido tries to get Gigantor standing again. Fido then starts to headbutt Gigantor as he holds his body up. Managing only to prop him up against the ropes. Fido nails Gigantor with another Shining Wizard that sends further blood flying from Gigantor's mouth. This time, Fido makes the cover for real...*

1...





2...





3!!!

*"Unleash Me" plays again as the audience boos. Fido himself, doesn't look too happy, but Faulkner seems quite pleased with his associate.*

Tom: That was just unnecessarily brutal. We really don't need to see that kind of competition in W*I*G.

Jeannie: It takes all kinds of competitors to make things work in this organization, Tom. Fido's just... different, but I bet I could tame him.

*The referee hesitantly approaches Fido, not quite wanting to raise his arm to indicate his victory. The ref moves to hold Fido's arm, but Fido snarls at him as he approaches. Fido is calmed again when Faulkner enters the ring & raises his arm. He puts the collar back on, and he smiles wickedly as he looks down at Gigantor on the mat.*

Tom: These guys just give me the creeps. Can we go to something else, please?

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

*Cut to the Fink in the ring.*
Finkel: The following contest, scheduled for 1 fall, is the Titles Versus Careers match! The rules are as follows- the Highland Diamonds’ W*I*G Tag Team Titles are on the line, but, if the challengers Team Raftshack lose, their Pro Wrestling W*I*G contracts will be null and void and they shall be forced to quit their wrestling careers. For this match only, the titles can change hands on a count-out or disqualification for the champions, however if Raftshack are counted out or disqualified, they must quit W*I*G. In the event of a double countout or disqualification draw, the titles will be vacated AND Team Raftshack will have to leave W*I*G.

Tom: Well here we go, and the odds sure are stacked against Raftshack here!

Jeannie: The Diamonds have to win to keep their titles, but Raftshack have to win to keep their livelihoods!

Tom: You’re not going to see much more on the line in 1 match, this is the definition of high stakes.

*The familiar tones of Apache fill the WIGSphere as the crowd begins to cheer loudly in the background. The lights quickly lower, lasers beginning to shoot off all over the place as a purple puff of smoke billows from the top of the entrance ramp. Quickly, the two men known as Team Raftshack stomp out from the back, both men with a very bizarre serious expression in their eyes. Clearly the both them realize the high stakes of this match as they look intently towards the ring, heading swiftly down the rampway and sliding inside. The two men quickly look at another as they stand in the ring, now lying in wait for their opponents.*

Finkel: Introducing the challengers! From Foreign Alien Island, at a combined weight of 399 pounds, Zeleke Ekelez and Faboon Noobaf, Team Raftshack!

Tom: This is it Lawless. Tonight is Team Raftshack's last chance at the tag team titles. If they lose here tonight, it's all over for them.

Jeannie: That's right. Raftshack walks into this match with a clear disadvantage too. They have yet to pin or even submit the Highland Diamonds. If they can't accomplish either deat, well you can kiss their careers goodbye

*The Highland Diamonds' theme cues up, and they walk out onto the stage as it picks up into the guitar riffs. Angus looks focused, the Emerald Warrior is perhaps at the height of arrogance, holding a job centre leaflet and dole form attached to a clipboard and waving them at Raftshack.*

Finkel: And their opponents, respectively from Aberdeen, Scotland and the possibly the Jewel Mines of Peru, at a combined weight of 476 pounds, they are the current W*I*G Tag Team Champions, Angus MacAngus and The Emerald Warrior, the Highland Diamonds!

Tom; Here come the champions. Twice now they’ve beaten Raftshack, if they make it 3 its all over, but Faboon, in his own unique way, explained his belief in the 3rd time being the charm and it will have to be here.

Jeannie: And the Emerald Warrior looks to be sending a message with those leaflets, I would say that’ll get under Raftshack’s skin but frankly, I don’t even know how you’re meant to annoy those 2.

*The Diamonds walk to the ring determined. They look to their waists to remove their belts, but this moment’s inattention is all Team Raftshack need to seize an opening, as they both dive over the top rope with planchas onto the champions, not even waiting for the bell!*

Tom: And this one’s hit the fan already!!!

DIGN DING DING!!!

*Raftshack pick themselves up quickly, and grab the Diamonds, hitting a couple of forearms before rolling them into the ring. Zeleke picks up Warrior’s clipboard and holds it in his teeth, while ripping the papers to bits. Raftshack both vault onto the apron, and slingshot in only to fake the dive, rolling across the mat and under the regrouped Diamond’s clotheslines. Raftshack both get up and Zeleke spits the clipboard into the air, creating another momentary distraction for Raftshack to hit double dropkicks, wobbling the Diamonds back into the ropes. Raftshack get up immediately and rush the Diamonds in the ropes, going for an Irish whip right across the ring. The Diamonds reverse and go for a backdrop and clothesline, but Zeleke rolls over the Warrior’s back and Faboon slides through Angus’ legs. Raftshack then grab both champions in rear waistlocks and vault onto their shoulders victory-roll style, only to spin out and send the Diamonds to the far ropes with stereo hurracanranas!! The Diamonds get up and Raftshack rush. Angus and Warrior both go to low bridge the ropes only for Raftshack to slam on the brakes short and handspring backwards again! The Diamonds then both clamber up from the mat and go for clotheslines, only for Raftshack to again dodge and swing into crucifix positions before spinning out and hitting dual crucifix headscissors, sending the Diamonds back to the other side of the ring! Both champions get up dizzy and dazed, and Raftshack charge and hit another pair of dropkicks, this time knocking Angus and the Warrior backwards through the ropes to the floor!!*

Tom: I can’t keep up with this! Raftshack are just pure bundles of energy! In the opening 60 seconds they’ve already sent the Diamonds out of the ring, back in, back and forth and back out again!

Jeannie: Zeleke and Faboon look like they’re trying to catch Usain Bolt’s eye here! This isn’t a wrestling match, it’s a sprint!

*Raftshack both go for another set of high dives, only to fake by grabbing the top rope, and using the rebound to swing themselves through the ropes for baseball dropkicks! Warrior eats Zeleke’s boots, but Angus catches Faboon, only for Faboon to think fast and push off from the apron, hitting a hurracanrana onto the ringside mats! The fans are already on their feet as Raftshack show little signs of tiring. Zeleke assists Faboon with Angus and they perform a double Irish whip into the guardrail, before charging at him. Angus ducks and tries to elevate them both, but they turn and perform a unique counter that best resembles a 2-man tornado DDT onto the guardrail, smashing Angus’ face into the barrier! They then both leap onto the rail themselves and run at the standing Warrior, Zeleke sailing off to perform a sunset flip off the rail with Faboon following with a double knee strike, the improvised double team flattening the Emerald Warrior! Zeleke and Faboon both immediately roll the Warrior into the ring, and Zeleke goes to the apron while Faboon slides in and goes for a quick pinfall.


1……



2…..


3-no!!! Warrior kicked out!*

Tom: Good golly miss Molly! It was almost over in under 5 minutes!

Jeannie: My name’s Jeannie and you’re absolutely right! Raftshack are starting this match in the highest gear, and a succession of resourceful and unique double teams almost won them the titles in record time!

Tom: Their careers are on the line remember, they’re not going to risk slowing down and letting the Diamonds catch a breather, this is must-win for them and their best chance is to outquick the champions.

Jeannie: But this style will require them to get the job done quickly. As energetic as they are even Team Raftshack can’t keep this pace up forever, they’ve got to win this inside 10 minutes or they’ll be too worn out.

*Faboon shows a brief sign of this as he pauses for a couple of seconds to catch a breath after the pin attempt. He recovers quickly though and picks up the Warrior, elbowing him in the head as he does so. He hits a pair of kicks to the midsection followed by an uppercut kick to the chin, and then goes for another Irish whip. Faboon hits the ropes even as he sends Warrior off, and jumps for a big crossbody as they meet. Despite the Emerald Warrior’s superior size, Faboon’s momentum and freshness win out as he floors Warrior again, staying on top for a cover

1…..


2……


Kick out!
Faboon uses the power of the kickout to roll to his feet, and hits a basement dropkick to the back of the Emerald Warrior. Warrior winces and rolls to get up, only to be taken down quickly with an arm drag by Faboon! Noobaf hits a 2nd armdrag as Warrior rolls up again, but keeps hold of the arm before rolling through in an unorthodox manner that rolls Warrior onto his feet and Faboon in position for a monkey flip, which he executes immediately, launching Warrior towards Team Raftshack’s corner. Warrior sits in the corner as Faboon charges and performs a headstand on the top turnbuckle. Warrior, expecting him to swing down with a dropkick, curls up to protect his face. However it fails as faboion topples the other way, swinging round onto the apron and performing a dropkick from outside in, hitting the Emerald Warrior in the back of the head. Warrior rolls forward and lies prone near the corner as Faboon tags Zeleke, who bounds to the top turnbuckle. Zeleke makes a brief taunt before jumping and hitting a cannonball senton, before dragging the Warrior out and making a cover


1….



2….


Angus breaks it up! Having finally recovered from the vicious DDT onto the guardrail, though not without a bloodied mouth, Angus stomps Zeleke in the head to break the count. He hits an uppercut to knock Zeleke off of his partner, before the referee forces him back to his corner.*

Tom: The covers coming thick and fast, while dropkicks and hurracanranas seem to be the moves of the day. Raftshack were smart to make the tag there, keeping the energy levels high!

Jeannie: Aw dammit ref, I almost got to see Angus get involved there. I want to watch him do more than stand on the apron.

Tom: We’ve got an incredibly frenetic match going on in the ring, and you’re watching Angus on the apron?

Jeannie: Well…..Got to analyse him, try and work out if he’s going to interfere in the match.

Tom; Riiiiiight.

*Zeleke stands up and repeatedly slaps himself in the face, waiting for the Emeralds Warrior to come to. Warrior stands and Zeleke hits the ropes, rebounding and ducking Warrior’s clothesline. He then slides through the Warrior’s legs and continues running the ropes, before rolling off Emerald Warrior’s back as he attempts a back drop, and again hitting the ropes. Zeleke cartwheels out of the way of an Emerald Gleam as Warrior gets increasingly frustrated, and Zeleke rebounds again. The Warrior goes for a forearm but Zeleke goes behind, before spinning himself back round to face the Warrior and slinging Warrior into the ropes. The Warrior rebounds and Zeleke drops down. Warrior jumps over and Zeleke stands. The Warrior continues to rebound and goes for a lariat but Zeleke performs a Matrix and dodges. Warrior goes to sweep Zeleke’s legs out as he bridges, but Zeleke tucks and lies prone. Warrior goes to hit an elbow drop but Zeleke performs a kip up to avoid it and Warrior just hits the mat. The Emerald Warrior is now fuming and tries to chop-block Zeleke’s legs, but Ekelez performs an impressive standing backflip and avoids it. Warrior gets up again and just decides to screw it, going for a right handed punch. But Zeleke dodges! Warrior punches with his left hand, Zeleke weaves out of the way again! Warrior goes to punch with both hands, Zeleke drops to all fours and Warrior just punches his own hands! As he yelps in pain Zeleke hits a quick fireman’s carry and Warrior tumbles to the mat again! Warrior gets up and swings a wild haymaker but Zeleke ducks….only to be turned inside out as Angus, having had enough, charges in and lariats Zeleke’s head off!! Angus backs to his corner and Warrior, worn out, makes the tag. The referee relents and Angus enters legally.*

Jeannie: Hooray! Angus is finally doing stuff!

Tom: Zeleke must be made of rubber and banana skins! The Emerald Warrior just can’t get close to getting a grip on him!

Jeannie: Dunno why he’d want to get a grip on Zeleke anyway. Angus however, I could understand.

Tom: Jeannie! Cliché! Again!!

*Angus aggressively stomps Zeleke, raining boots down over and over again as if trying to stamp him flat to the mat! Angus then picks Zeleke up by 1 arm, and hits another huge lariat, keeping hold of the arm! He drags him up again and pulls him in, hitting a high angle T Bone suplex and dumping Zeleke on his neck and shoulders! Angus picks up the diminutive challenger by the head and, grabbing Zeleke’s chin in a tight clamp, rears back and strikes with a horrifically forceful boxing cross, the crack resounding round the arena as Zeleke is lifted off his feet and drops like a stone. Angus makes a cover

1…..



2…..


Faboon breaks it up with a double axe handle!!*

Tom: Oh my! That was just a plain ugly punch by Angus!

Jeannie: I think I saw some of Zeleke’s teeth reach the tenth row!

*Faboon rolls out quickly, avoiding Angus’ lashing kick. Angus turns back to Zeleke, who is already bleeding from the mouth like Angus himself. The Scottish heavyweight picks up his unpredictable opponent and hits an uppercut, the crowd Ooooohing as Zeleke staggers backwards on rubbery legs. Angus kicks Zeleke in the stomach, doubling him over, then grabs him by his spiky hair and charges at a neutral corner, slamming Zeleke’s face into the turnbuckle! Zeleke crumples in a heap, his face resting on the middle buckle. Angus has a crazy look in his eyes and drags Zeleke out, pulling him up and throwing him with a near-vertical German suplex, but keeps hold, lifts him again, and performs a vicious back suplex, again targeting Zeleke’s head! Zeleke is in a heap on the floor, and Angus just soccer kicks him in the mouth again, another collective wince emanating from the crowd. Angus, still with a manic expression, makes the cover

1……



2……


Zeleke just kicks out!*

Tom: Raftshack always bring the speed, Angus always brings the brutal, and that’s exactly what we’re seeing here now. Zeleke’s head and face are just getting hammered here, he may well have no teeth left.

Jeannie: I’m just loving the wild look in Angus’ eyes. Imagine what he could do if he got his hands on you while looking like that.

Tom: Knock your teeth out and try to break your neck?

Jeannie: Use your imagination Tom! I know I’m the colour commentator but try to add a bit yourself here!

*Angus deathstares Zeleke, and picks him up again. He slaps him hard in the mouth, turning Zeleke through 270 degrees as the Raftshackian flops into the ropes. Angus presses down on the back of Zeleke’s head, choking him on the top rope, before grabbing hold and throwing him by his hair towards the Diamonds’ corner. Angus tags the Warrior, and snapmares Zeleke down as the Warrior climbs the corner. Warrior leaps off, but just stomps Zeleke in the mush with 1 foot, the manic challenger rolling in pain holding his mouth. Warrior makes a cover

1….



2…..



Kick out by Zeleke!

Warrior shakes his head and picks Zeleke up, before dropping him right back down with a brainbuster, further rattling the challenger’s head. Warrior then grabs Zeleke in a bulldog headlock, and charges towards a corner going for the Maceface, but Zeleke falls to the ground and pushes, sending Warrior rear-end first into the top turnbuckle! The green clad champion slams into the buckle and tumbles off head over heels, landing on his head on the ring mat. Zeleke writhes and spasms on the mat as Faboon implores for a tag. Angus however enters the ring, rushing Faboon to take him out. Faboon expects it however and low bridges on the apron, causing Angus to overbalance and teeter stomach-first on the top rope. Faboon then stands up as Zeleke shoves, sending MacAngus out to the floor! Zeleke makes the tag and as Faboon jumps in Zeleke jumps out, landing on Angus with another Plancha!*

Tom: And Zeleke makes the tag!

Jeannie: Things are about to become hard to follow again Tom, you’re going to really have to earn your paycheck now!

Tom: You asked me to help with the colour, maybe you can gimme a hand with the play by play!!

Jeannie: Can’t, too busy watching Angus and Zeleke at ringside.

*Faboon charges in and takes Warrior down with a flying forearm! Warrior gets up and turns to face Faboon, and Faboon goes for a kick. Warrior catches, and Faboon attempts the enzugiri, but Warrior ducks. Faboon however lands on his feet, but Warrior prevents the follow up kick by applying a wheelbarrow hold. He goes for the wheelbarrow suplex but Faboon counters into a bulldog hold into a headlock takeover! Warrior reverses with the headscissors, but Faboon spins out and performs a jacknife cradle!

1…..


2……


Warrior kicks out and applies a powerbomb hold. He lifts Faboon, presumably attempting the Gem Driller, but Faboon slips out behind. Faboon hits the ropes only to take an Emerald Gleam between the eyes! Warrior makes a cover

1…..


2….


Kick out!!
Meanwhile, at ringside, Zeleke is brawling with Angus towards the foreign announce table. Angus gets the upper hand and tries for a Saltire, but Zeleke squirms free and throws caution to the wind with a headbutt! He ends up hurting himself more, but manages to apply a facelock, going for a Dizzy Spineroo Driver through the announce table! However as he jumps, Angus turns and just shrugs him off onto the table. *

Tom: This one’s getting wild! Action in and out of the ring here!

Jeannie: Why can’t Angus and Zeleke be brawling by our announce table?

*Back in the ring, Warrior sighs and kicks Faboon, before climbing the corner and signalling for a 5 Star Moonsault. At ringside, Angus climbs onto the table with Zeleke, and goes to Piledriver him through it, but Zeleke squirms out into a handstand and hits a helicopter kick on the announce table! Angus is wobbled, and Zeleke then grabs him and connects with a snap DDT, denting the table and laying Angus out.*


Jeannie: Why can’t Angus be laid out on our announce table!?

Tom: Because our announce table never gets broken!

*Zeleke quickly rolls into the ring, where Warrior is poised to fly, only to be cut off as Faboon springs up and dropkicks the top rope, jolting Warrior to land on the buckles facing outwards! Faboon scales the buckles with Warrior while Zeleke climbs the ring post closest to the announce table with the comatose McAngus. Faboon sets the Emerald Warrior up for…..a top rope Big Ostrich Balloon Blaster!? Zeleke points and counts with his fingers 3…2….1! Zeleke then leaps off the turnbuckle towards McAngus, performing a Lemon With a Twist of Mango through the announce table- but Angus half rolls out of the way and Zeleke only brushes the champion, enough to incapacitate him but not as much as he hoped. The announce table near-explodes from the impact, and both illegal men are out of it at ringside. Faboon prepares to spin off the top for a sure match ender, but Warrior breaks free! He grabs Faboon and stands up on the middle turnbuckle, turning Faboon upside down as he does so, before leaping off with a top rope Gem Driller!!! The crowd roars as Warrior slams into the mat while Faboon is driven into his knee, the impact bouncing the challenger backwards as he flips 360 degrees over and lands on his stomach about 10 feet away!*

Tom: Good god! Top rope Gem Driller! That is it, this match is over!

Jeannie: Everybody’s down! Why can’t Angus be down by-

Tom: Forget Angus and focus on the match!

*Warrior groggily stirs, having hurt his own back and knees on that last move. He crawls towards Faboon, and rolls the challenger over, covering without hooking the leg.*

1……



Jeannie: He’s made the cover!



2……




Tom: Raftshack’s W*I*G careers are over, surely!





Jeannie: 3!!!
3-wait, no!!! Faboon rolled a shoulder up at the last minute!

Tom: What!? He kicked out!

*The Emerald Warrior can’t believe it, he’s practically crying that Faboon kicked out. Warrior rolls off Faboon and lies flat on the mat on his own stomach, stunned and exhausted. Slowly, the Peruvian pushes back to his feet on all fours, as Faboon continues to lie on the canvas, desperately trying to recover. as he clutches at his torso. Eventually the white haired creature begins to rise slowly to his feet, only to immediately be snatched by the already arisen warrior. He then takes him high into the air above his shoulders once more, setting him up for a second Gem Driller! Quickly he swings him downwards, only to suddenly be taken down and rolled up into a desperation Hurracanrana pin, Faboon's manages to coil his legs around his opponent's neck just in time!*

1.....



Bailey: Great counter by Faboon!



2.....


Jeannie: It could all be over here!




3-NO! Emerald Warrior manages to escape at the last moment, shoving the lighter Faboon off of his form before grasping at his neck. Faboon meanwhile manages to roll off to the side, reaching up and grabbing at the ropes nearby, now helping himself back to his feet. Warrior soon rises to a vertical base nearby, looking intently at his infuriating opponent. He then quickly lunges forward and unleashes yet another mighty Emerald Gleam! Faboon however once again avoids it, rolling beneath the Warrior's boot, then catching the surprised Warrior as he turns back around with a super kick of his own! Warrior gasps out in pain, immediately clutching his forehead and tumbling to the mat once again. Faboon then follows and falls atop his opponent's own limp shape, resulting in a rather unique cover.*

1......

Bailey: Faboon is running purely on the fumes whatever fuel that powers these Raftshackians now. He's taking advantage of Warrior's frustrations and making everything he can out of them!

Jeannie: But that's not gonna work forever! Emerald Warrior may be arrogant, but he's not stupid!

2.....




Bailey: This may be Faboon's and Team Raftshack's last chance at victory...


3-STILL NO! Warrior manages to launch his shoulder up off the canvas at the last moment, eyes looking almost completely glazed over at the moment. Faboon's in not much better shape, having yet to recover from that Top Rope Gem Driller. Slowly the two of them look over towards their respective corners, but Zeleke is still down and out amongst the wreckage of that announce table. Angus isn't much better off himself, lying in a heap just off to the side of the debris. The referee looks down at both men, then simply nods and begins to count them both out.*

1......



2......


Bailey: This is not good for either team. As the rules stated, if both teams are counted out, not only will the titles be vacated, but Team Raft Shack will STILL have to leave!

Jeannie: Though when you think about it, the Diamonds are still better off in the situation. Even if they do lose the titles, they'll still be rid of Team Raft Shack. Not to mention the fact that they could almost certainly pick up those belts again in the future. But with Team Raft Shack, if they lose... it's over. Done. Finito. No Mas.

3.......


4.......

*Both men begin to stir a bit on the mat, Faboon and the Emerald Warrior beginning to show some signs of life as they try to push back off the canvas.*


5.......


6.......

Jeannie: Emerald and Faboon both showing signs of life! Clearly neither of these teams don't want to give up either their titles or their careers.

Tom: Exactly. No matter the cost, a wrestler's career is sacred. They will do anything to hold onto it, even if it means risking bodily harm.

Jeannie: It's kind of stupid when you think about it... risking serious injury... or even death, just so you can hold onto that spotlight for a little longer. But that spotlight is both of these four men's bread and butter. It supports them and gives them pride. Whatever the cost, these men will do anything to hold on for just a little longer.

7........

*Slowly the two men try to sit up from off their backs, the pair panting quite heavily as they do.*

8........

Jeannie: THIS IS IT!

9........

10- just before the count can be finalized, both Faboon and Emerald Warrior somehow manage to sit back up off the mat, the crowd cheering loudly as they both manage to do so. The two men slowly turn their heads towards one another, a very serious look now emenating from them both. They then push back to their feet and gaze right into each other's eyes quite intently. Suddenly, the white locked weirdo fires off a stiff kick to the side, Warrior staggering back from the force a bit only to lunge back in and deliver a equally stiff kick of his own, connecting and sending the exhausted Faboon stumbling backwards. He however braces himself and maintains his balance, firing back once again with another swift foot to his opponent, teeth gritting as he endures the pain coarsing through his body. Warrior grimaces himself, knees nearly buckling underneath him, the possible Peruvian immediately unleashing a second attack of his own. Faboon stumbles back once again from this next foot, now grasping at his side in pain, countering immediately with yet another foot of his own! Warrior however catches this one in his arms, grabbing firmly onto that leg and sneering back at his opponent! Faboon quickly leaps up and attempts an enziguri, but he manages to duck this move as well, now grabbing ahold of both his opponent's leg and holding him up off the mat. As he does though, Faboon manages to wrap those limbs around his neck, then spinning and taking him to the mat with a headlock takedown! Warrior's eyes go wide as he tumbles to canvas, grasping his neck in pain as Faboon manages to get back to his feet. Warrior slowly follows himself, just in time for Faboon to leap forward and take him down with a leg lariat! Once again, he gasps out in pain, grabbing once more on his throat. Faboon drops down atop him once more and hooks his leg, looking to make a cover!*

1......



2......



NO! Faboon seems to have changed his mind, rising back up and pulling the Warrior up along with him. He then quickly grabs him by the neck and spins around, taking him down with a swift swinging neckbreaker! Warrior looks on in pain, face twisting as Faboon once again goes for a cover!*

Tom: A little extra insurance from Faboon. He wants to make absolutely sure he can get everything he can out of each pin attempt!

Jeannie: Sometimes it's not a bad idea to rethink your strategies in a match. And this is the perfect match for that philosophy!

1.......



2.......

Tom: This could be it!


3-No! Warrior manages to shoulder up off the canvas once more. Now Faboon is the one whose looking surprised. He grabs his wild hair and rakes his digits down the side of his face, now looking a bit flustered himself. He rises to his feet once more, sweat pouring down his face, as he pulls Warrior up with him. He then grabs him around the neck and leaps up for a Tornado DDT, only for Warrior to push him off in mid air, Faboon landing in front of the masked man, then take him over by the waist into a bridging German Suplex!*

Tom: Faboon made a mistake!

1.......



2.......



Jeannie: Say goodnight Raft Shack!

3-NO! Faboon just barely manages to escape at the last possible moment, flopping down nearby and breathing quite heavily. Emerald simply looks on in dismay from his own laying position, gazing out towards the outside in hopes that his partner may have recovered. But unfortunately for them both, it doesn't seem to be the case.*

Tom: That was a close one. You can tell that when these teams first met, that could've been a match ender. But after meeting in the ring so many times, these teams have really adapted to each other's wrestling styles.

Jeannie: You've got that right. but I think that may have been Faboon's last stand. One more mistake like that and he's gonna end up regretting it.

*Once again, the pair begin to push back to their feet, locking eyes once more as they manage to stand. Faboon unleashes a desperation spinning heel kick, only for Warrior to quickly duck underneath it! He then grabs Faboon around the head and quickly crosses his throat, charging with him for the Maceface! Faboon however shoves him off in mid run, sending the man stumbling forwards, then bounces off the ropes and grabs him for a bulldog of his own! He then runs full speed towards the ropes, exerting the last of his energy in the process, trying to complete the move, but Warrior is holding onto too tightly. Eventually, Faboon simply charges right at the ropes and runs up them, then flipping behind and turning the move into a falling reverse DDT! Warrior cries out in pain, grabbing his neck once more as he lies in a heap on the canvas. Faboon eyes him as he lays there and nods slowly to himself, before crawling desperately over towards the nearby turnbuckle. He reaches up and slowly begins to ascend the top rope. The crazed man then looks down towards his fallen opponent and shouts to the heavens, preparing for a Crashing Helicopter Crunch!*

Tom: Faboon with a great counter here! And now he's only moments away from saving his and Zeleke's care.... OH NO!

*However before he can leap off, Angus is back up, leaping onto the apron and shoving him hard off the turnbuckle, sending the poor man sailing and crashing in a heap on the mat! The crowd boos angrily at this, as Angus manages to stumble back into the ring, moving around quite gingerly as he does. He then yells at his fallen partner, Emerald slowly nodding as he manages to push back to his feet. The two men then look down at the fallen Faboon and hoist him up swiftly off the mat, before pulling him up into position for the Moorlands Driver! Faboon simply lies there helplessly, watching as he's immediately driven down to the canvas swiftly! He crumples to the mat and flops onto his back, as Angus reaches down and helps Emerald back atop his opponent, allowing him to make the cover.*

Jeannie: Angus is back!

Tom: The Highland Diamonds have reunited... and that's not good for Faboon. Especially not after that devastating Moorlands Driver.

Jeannie: The fat lady is warming up now!

1.......



2........




3-Zeleke lunges in from out of nowhere, shoving Warrior desperately off his ally's prone form!*

Tom: ZELEKE IS BACK UP!

Jeannie: How the hell is he still able to move?!

*Angus looks down at the pink haired being in absolutely shock, Warrior sharing his feeling as well, as the two look at one another in absolute disbelief! Zeleke meanwhile pushes back to his feet and looks at them both with an absolutely pissed expression, a very rare emotion from the man. Warrior and McAngus immediately push back to their feet and lunge right at the manic man, only for him to duck underneath, managing to sprint towards the other side of the ropes somehow, seemingly ignoring the pain most definitely filling his veins. He then bounces back towards them, the Diamonds lunging forward with a double clothesline, only for him to duck once more! They stumble forward in surprise, turning around once more to face him as he ricochets towards them yet again, the two now setting up for a double backdrop! They manage to launch him up as he comes close, Zeleke however grabbing them both in mid air by the necks, then spinning around and setting them up for a DOUBLE DIZZY SPINNEROO DRIVER!*

Tom: DOUBLE DIP DIZZY SPINNEROO DRIVER!

Jeannie: NO WAY! How can that freak still be able to move?!

Tom: Zeleke may have just turned this match around.

*Angus and Emerald both now lie on the canvas, the former rolling slowly to the outside of the ring to recover, Warrior however seeming not as capable of this himself, as he continues to lay there in a heap. Zeleke meanwhile lies panting on the canvas, now looking towards his tag team partner with desperate eyes, motioning for him to make the pin! Faboon seems to get the message, now slowly tumbling over towards the fallen Diamond. He then drapes an arm across his fallen form, as the referee makes the count!*

1.......

Tom: THIS IS IT!

Jeannie: Damn it... these guys can't win here! THEY JUST CAN'T!

2.......

TOM: NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!

3-NO?! Emerald Warrior manages to get a shoulder just barely off of the canvas.

Jeannie: That was close... too damn close.

Tom: Zeleke may have hit the move on both men, but I think by dividing his efforts, he also divided the effectiveness of that usually match ending move.

*Faboon and Zeleke both look on from the mat in total disbelief at one another. Slowly, the two men begin to stand back to their feet, now nodding intently at one another, as they eye the downed Emerald Warrior. Somehow, the Highland Diamond manages to get back to his feet, looking completely out of things now as he wobbles from his position. Zeleke and Faboon then quickly slip between him and go for the Halt Grinder! However, instead of hitting Warrior, they deliver the move to the referee inadvertently as he's shoved from behind! The crowd begins booing loudly at this, as Team Raft Shack look at one another in horror. The two men then turn in this direction, just in time to see Angus McAngus charge forward and clobber them both with the W*I*G* Tag Team Championships with a double clothesline! The two men quickly go tumbling down to the canvas, McAngus looking on with a huge sneer at his fallen opponents. He then looks over to the wobbling Warrior and points to Faboon on the canvas. The two men then quickly reach up and pull him to his feet, as Angus now positions one of the belt's at Faboon's feet. They then hoist the white haired being into their grip, MacAngus in a cradle pileddriver and Warrior in a tombstone position. They then drive him viciously atop the belt with a Concussion Syndrome!*

Tom: OH MY GOD!

Jeannie: That... that may be taking things a little far.

*The crowd begins booing vociferously, as Faboon flops in a heap to the canvas, his forehead now bleeding profusely as the move seems to have busted him wide open. Angus then reaches down and grabs Zeleke, charging forward and tossing him high over the ropes and out of the ring, sending him crashing to the outside as well. He then kicks that now stained belt to the outside and follows after Zeleke, as Warrior meanwhile shakes and reawakens the referee, whose looking more than a little groggy right now. He then climbs back over and drapes himself atop the laid out Faboon, as the count is made.*

Tom: This can't be...

1.......



2.......



Tom: DAMN IT FABOON, DON'T GIVE UP!




3.

Tom: DAMN IT! GOD DAMN IT! The Highland Diamonds just retained their belts by hook or by crook and in the process... we have seen the end of Team Raftshack.

*Rhapsody's Emerald Sword picks up once again, as the crowd lets forth a series of loud angry jeers in the background. Angus slips back into the ring slowly, gasping a bit as he does, as he proudly grabs Warrior by the arm and raises it up high in victory!*

Finkel: Here are your winners... and still W*I*G* Tag Team Champions... The Highland Diamonds.

*Warrior looks on with false pride and sports a huge fecal eating smile, now embracing his tag team partner in a hug, MacAngus returning a similiar look and giving an equally overjoyed embrace of his own, clearly just rubbing the crowd's face in their victory. The referee has meanwhile slipped to the outside, grabbing both tag team belts and presenting them back to the champions. They take them with pride and hold them up high above their heads, simply enraging the crowd even more. Eventually, they become so furious that they begin pelting the ring with garbage, empty cups, wadded up popcorn bags, and other various brikabrak begins flooding the ring as the Diamonds quickly exit the ring, both men laughing quite proudly at their victory as they leave their former rivals in a heap outside the ring.*

Tom: This is disgusting. These two know exactly what they did here.

Jeannie: Disgusting or not... the point is that the referee never saw em, so there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it! All that matters is the Highland Diamonds have retained... and Team Raftshack is on a one way trip back to the nuthouse.

*Eventually, the two have left the ringside area. As the previous music begins to fade out, Zeleke is somehow back to his feet, looking on disbelief at the inside of the ring, then in the middle of it where his tag team partner can be seen lying. Slowly he slips into the ring and crawls over, checking on and examining the fallen Faboon. The pink haired being then gazes back over towards the entrance rampway, eyes full of fury as his face twists into a furious scowl. He pounds on the mat in absolute anger at what just happened, before reaching down and helping his ally back to his feet, the latter's forehead still leaking a bit of blood as it sprinkles down into the canvas below. Faboon looks into his tag team partner's eyes in almost a drunken stupor, before slumping forward and flopping against his form. Meanwhile in the background, the crowd begins clapping in appreciation for the two's efforts tonight, though they lost. Soon enough a saddening chant of "Please don't go!" picks up throughout the arena. Zeleke simply looks out to the crowd with a mournful expression in his eyes, a tear slowly beginning to travel down his cheek. He then looks back up towards Faboon in his grip and simply lowers his head. He raises his arm towards the audience and gives a wave goodbye, before the lights lower and a puff of odd purple smoke appears in the middle of the ring, camoflauging the two. When it rises once again, the pair have vanished from the W*I*GSphere, perhaps for the last time.*

Tom: I wish I could be impartial right now... but after witnessing what just happened, I just can't. The Highland Diamonds have robbed Team Raft Shack blind tonight. The damn cowards knew the team had their number and so they resorted to whatever means necessary in order to retain. Simply put, these bastards were willing to end a team's career here tonight... just so they could hold onto those titles for another month. Angus MacAngus... Emerald Warrior... you don't deserve those titles. YOU DON'T DESERVE TO HOLD THEM AFTER TONIGHT! And if there's such a thing as karma... I gurandamntee that the both of you will be paying dearly for this! Mark my words!

Jeannie: Tom... I understand how you feel right now, but it's over. Team Raftshack lost... that's all there is to it. They're gone and the Diamonds are still the champions. Nothing you say is going to bring them back.

Tom: I know... but... DAMN IT! Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry you had to witness this... this sickening display tonight. I will try my best to retain my composure for the remaining entirety of this show.

*As the crowd continues chant loudly in the background, we zoom in to the center of the ring as the remaining amounts of smoke can be seen disappearing. As they do, we slowly fade out to a video package of the career of Team Raftshack.*

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

*Waylander's "Born to the Fight" cues up in the W*I*G-Sphere & the crowd starts booing & jeering as Shane Malone appears on the stage after the opening tin whistle solo. Shane is carrying a Tricolour-wrapped Hurley with him. He raises both arms in the air as the usual Green, White & Gold pyro goes off behind him.*

Howard Finkel: The following contest will be the Highland Hell Match in which victory can only be acheived by scoring a pinfall, submission & finally a knockout on your opponent. Introducing first, representing Team Ireland, standing six feet, eight inches tall, weighing in at 307lbs, from Galway, Ireland, he is "The Celtic Giant"... SHAAAANE... MAAAAA~LOOOOONE!

*Shane carries on down towards the ring. Neither ignoring nor acknowledging the fans around him.*

Tom: An unusual sight. Another Team Ireland member out here without Coach O'Hare.

Jeannie: Maybe they're trying to prove something without O'Hare tonight, or maybe he got caught in traffic.

Tom: Either way, without the Coach's insight it's different for Team Ireland. Let's see if Shane fares better now than Maeve did earlier tonight.

*Shane steps into the ring over the top rope. He tears his Team Ireland shirt off & tosses the shred outside the ring where a stage-hand scurries away with them. Bagpipes fill the air in the arena while the lights dim, turning to light blue and white spotlights that search the arena. They all focus on the ramp. The bagpipes fade out, yielding to Alice Cooper's "School's Out". Over the din of the music, a roaring engine can be heard, a roaring engine that revs on command. Chaz Stone parts the curtain with force on his motorcycle as the crowd cheers mightily for him. He throws up a Maloik and revs the engine for the fans as they try to out-strip it in noise. Chaz rolls quickly down to the ring on his ride, the St. Andrews Cross attached to his saddlebag flapping in the wind, then does a lap around the outside. When he gets off, he swings his far leg over the top and to the ground. Chaz grabs his flag and waves it around in proud, wide strokes, taunting Shane with the motion. He slaps hands with the fans as he walks to the ring, replacing his flag in its proper place. Chaz slides into the ring head-first. He stands up and throws up a double Maloik for the fans. He then stretches out further in his corner, ready for the match.*

DING-DING!

*Immediately after the ring of the bell, the two huge Celts barge right into each other. Neither one seems to budge despite the impact which causes the ring to shake. Shane swings a huge right at Chaz. Chaz blocks & retaliates with an attempted right of his own. Shane blocks that move & attempts to lift Chaz up for a slam. Chaz works his way out of Shane's grip & tries to lift up the "Celtic Giant". Shane is able to escape from Chaz & finally manages to clobber the "Tower of Power" with a Clothesline. The move staggers Chaz, but it isn't enough to take him down. Chaz invites Shane to try again making a "bring it on" motion with his fingers. Shane runs right at Chaz with another Clothesline which still isn't enough to take the huge Scotsman down. Before Chaz can give Shane another opportunity to Clothesline him, Shane is already on the move. Chaz manages to duck under the Clothesline & he clubs Shane in the back of the head. Shane staggers forward & Chaz tries to trap him in a rear waistlock. Shane nails Chaz with a few reverse elbow shots to the face, enough to make Chaz release his grip. Shane slips behind Chaz & manages to lock him into a Full Nelson. Chaz slips down & out of the move before Shane can execute "The Dragon Slayer". The two men are standing inches apart when Chaz rocks Shane with a surprise Uppercut. Shane staggers back a little bit & Chaz picks him up. Chaz attempts to hit Shane with an "Emerauld Reekie", but Shane manages to escape before Chaz can hit the move completing Fall Away Slam by elbowing him repeatedly in the side of the head. Chaz is forced to drop Shane.*

Tom: The action is incredible here in the opening moments of this match. I'm not sure I've ever seen two such evenly matched individuals.

Jeannie: Guh...

Tom: I'm sure you meant to make some comment about their bodies, yeah?

Jeannie: Buh...

*Shane rolls outside the ring for a moment as Chaz is still reeling slightly inside. Shane begins to rummage around the ring for whatever weapons he can manage to find. He walks towards the announcers table & retrieves the ring bell. Shane looks up just in time to see Chaz come flying over the top rope. Shane, instinctively, holds his hands up, & Chaz bashes his head right against the ring bell with an almighty "CLANG!". Shane rolls over Chaz, who is already bleeding profusely from the forehead. Shane makes a cover on Chaz on the floor...*

1...





2...





KICKOUT!

Tom: Malone got that ring bell up just in time to catch Chaz Stone, who is already bleeding badly from the forehead, but it wasn't enough to keep the big guy from Scotland down!

Jeannie: Snuh...

Tom: She'll be back soon, folks.

*Shane stomps & kicks at the prone form of Chaz as the "Tower of Power" tries to cover up a bit. Chaz eventually rolls away, still a little bit woozy from colliding head-first with the ring-bell. Chaz holds a hand up to his forehead & shakes his head around a bit. He glances down & notices the blood on his hand, his blood. He turns back around to look at Shane only to be caught by a huge Spear! Shane makes a cover again...*

1...





2...





KICKOUT!

Tom: Malone still trying to take advantage of Chaz's disorientation. Despite the lack of Coach O'Hare's presence here this evening, Shane Malone is proving to be a formidable, dangerous competitor.

*Shane is growing frustrated from his lack of success. He resorts merely to choking Chaz, simultaneously depriving him of air & forcing more pressure on that forehead wound. Chaz gasps & coughs as blood pours down over his face & into his beard, but he manages to get a good kick off into Shane's groin. Shane topples over while experiencing the utmost agony. Chaz takes his time getting up, knowing full well that such a pain isn't about to go away any time too soon. Chaz puts the boots to Shane for a minute. Shane is trying his best to protect himself. Chaz continues to boot away. Chaz brings Shane to a standing position again Chaz tries to force Shane on to the announce table, but Shane resists & fights back. Shane slugs Chaz with another huge right hand. Chaz is, again, staggered by the blow. Chaz glances up again as Shane comes running at him brandishing The Fink's chair. Chaz ducks this assault & is able to successfully punch the chair with sufficient force to send it right back into Shane's face. Shane falls down to the floor as Chaz shakes his hand to get the feeling back in it.*

Tom: INCREDIBLE! He actually punched him through the chair. That can't be good for Chaz's hand, though. One has to wonder if this will affect him later in the match.

Jeannie: GO CHAZ!

Tom: Great googly moogly! She's ALIVE!

*This time, Chaz is able to drag Shane over towards the announce table. He rolls "The Celtic Giant" onto the desk, right in front of Tom & Jeannie. Chaz clambers back up into the ring. He takes a moment, then runs towards the ropes on the opposite side, hitting them at top speed & rebounding. He runs across the ring at a shocking pace before launching himself out over the top rope again! Shane moves aside at the last possible second & Chaz goes crashing through the announce table. Chaz lies in a heap of broken wood & splinters. Shane pounces on the opportunity, nearly falling on to Chaz as he makes his cover...*

1...





2...





3!!!

Howard Finkel: The first pinfall goes to Shane Malone!

Jeannie: GO SHANE!

Tom: At least you're not biased.

*Shane looks all pleased with himself. Not a sight we see too regularly from "The Celtic Giant". Shane stands again & immediately tries to lift Chaz up for a Torture Rack. The feat itself would not normally be too much of a problem, but when you're trying to lift Chaz Stone you'll always encounter some resistance. Chaz battles back against Shane, using his own earlier technique of throwing a few wild elbows at his opponent's temple. Shane eventually relents & is forced to let go of Chaz. Chaz makes another attempt at the "Emerauld Reekie", successfully executing the move this time. He follows up by rolling Shane back into the ring & dragging in The Fink's discarded chair. Shane comes barrelling right at Chaz as soon as he has re-entered the ring. Chaz is able to drop the chair & nail Malone with a Seattle Spinebuster onto the seating implement!*

Tom: OUCHA-MAGOWCHA! Shane was planted right onto that steel chair! That has to affect him in the long run in this match type.

*Chaz decides not to go for a cover, instead he sits down across Shane's back & traps him in "Ye're Under Arrest"! Shane tries shifting about in anyway possible. Attempting to even get to the ropes, but with the damage his back has just taken as well as the additional 290+lbs of burly Scotsman sitting on his back, Shane is going nowhere. Shane has no choice but to submit.*

Finkel: The first submission goes to Chaz Stone!

Jeannie: GO CHAZ!

*Chaz gets to his feet again, looking extremely chuffed with himself. He's not got too long to celebrate, however, as Shane soon gets up & tries to lock Chaz into a Full Nelson. Chaz manages to break Shane's grip & aims a punch at his big hairy noggin. Shane manages to catch Chaz's arm &, in a surprisingly technical move for Shane, locks in a Fujiwara Armbar. Chaz, barely a second from the move being locked in, taps out. Shane releases the hold, a little confused.*

Jeannie: GO... Wait, what the hell was that?

Finkel: The second submission goes to Shane Malone. Shane must now achieve a Knockout to win the match.

Tom: Chaz Stone is one of the toughest men in W*I*G! There's no way that hold hurt him that much!

*Shane continues to give Chaz an odd look.*

Chaz: Wha'? Ye dinnae t'ink I'd give ye the chance to soften me oop tha' mooch, did ye?

Tom: A smart move by Chaz. Sort of a "Live to fight another day mentality".

Jeannie: Ummm... GO CHAZ?

*Despite his demeanour, Chaz is now behind Shane Malone in terms of what he has to do to achieve victory. Shane tries to clobber Chaz with a big Lariat. Such is the force of the move & the speed with which it's executed that Chaz is taken totally by surprise & knocked flying right out of the ring. Shane grabs the trademark Team Ireland Hurley & exits the ring, sneaking up behind Chaz (or as close to sneaking as a 6'8", 307lbs Irishman can get). Chaz turns around in time to stop Malone in his tracks. Shane still tries to swing the Hurley, but Chaz is able to block the blow. He holds the Hurley at bay for a moment before ripping it from Shane's hands & breaking it in two over his knee. The crowd gives a cheer.*

Tom: Finally, somebody's done something about that damn Hurley. Maybe a Team Ireland match will finally finish without that thing being used!

*Shane grabs Chaz by an arm & tries whipping him towards the steps. Chaz manages to stop mere inches before reaching the steps, but he's still woozy enough from blood loss early in the match that he can't avoid Shane's Spear!*

Jeannie: YEOWCH! Chaz gets Speared right into the steps. I'll say that both men will be in considerable pain tomorrow morning!

*Shane stands again, brushing his long hair back. Chaz is in tremendous pain as is evident by his face. He reaches his hand around to support his back as he attempts to stand again. While Chaz takes a moment to himself, Shane pulls a table out from underneath the ring & slides it in. Chaz nails Shane with a Rabbit Clothesline & rolls his (slightly) larger opponent into the ring. Chaz follows shortly thereafter. Chaz begins to set up the table that Shane originally brought into the ring, but Malone hits him with a low-blow. Shane finishes setting up the table as Chaz lies on the mat, nursing his bruised billiards. Shane holds his arms wide, waiting for Chaz to stand again. As soon as Chaz is back up, Shane tries clamping him in the Full Nelson, aiming to give Chaz the "Dragon Slayer" through the table. Chaz is struggling to break Shane's grip this time. He tries throwing his head back in an attempt to hit the "Celtic Giant" on the nose, but he's held too far out to hit Shane. Chaz does his best to resist being taken back overhead. Then an idea hits him. One can practically see the light bulb go off over Chaz's head. He attacks Malone with a Mule Kick. Shane is doubled over again. As if Chaz's earlier testicular assault wasn't bad enough...*

Jeannie: STOP HITTING EACH OTHER DOWN THERE, DAMMIT!

*With Shane in a slightly more subdued, or at least pre-occupied, state, Chaz takes advantage. Chaz grabs Shane in a front Facelock & points towards the sky with his free right hand. The crowd are already agog in anticipation. Chaz lifts Shane right up in a Suplex, but the effort of the move is clearly having a toll on Chaz since he's lost so much blood. Chaz keeps Shane aloft for as long as he can before clamping his right hand around Shane's throat & driving him through the table with the "Emerald City Crash"! Chaz leaps on Shane to make a cover...*

1...





2...





3!!!

Finkel: The second pinfall goes to Chaz Stone. Chaz must now achieve a knockout to win the match.

Tom: EMERALD CITY CRASH THOUGH THE TABLE! What a display of strength by Chaz Stone!

Jeannie: I'll say! Mmmmmmrrrrroooowwwrrrr!

*Chaz stands up again, breathing heavily, blood dripping down his face turning his blue beard an odd shade of indigo. Shane crawls out from the pile of splinters & twisted metal. He is also breathing heavily, perhaps more so than Chaz. The two take a moment to look each other up & down before agreeing to see the match through to it's finish. Neither seems excited about the prospect of going another round against such tough opposition, but they suck it up, shake themselves back to life & prepare to continue. Before this happens, though, Chaz extends a single fist to his opponent.*

Jeannie: Eh? What's going on now?
Tom: My guess is Chaz is laying down some sort of gentlemen's challenge to his foe for this last fall. They've been evenly matched all throughout the series, so it is only fitting that every trial, every contest, all the pride and glory and bravado go into this last fall. This is for all the marbles, right here, right now, and I think we're in for a Hell of a ride now!
Jeannie: ...you need to get this worked up more often, Tom, you're actually interesting for once.

*Shane Malone looks at his foe hesitantly. He sees this man, the one that with whom he's been waging war since the last Stone's Quarry. The man who just put him through a table. The man whose brow he has split with a ring bell. The man who wanted to see him man up--to be a true Celt. Now, Shane has a chance to prove him right--and beat him. Shane taps Chaz's knuckles, and both men retreat a step and assume fighting positions. They then both grapple in and, in a moment reminiscent of the legendary Frye/Takiyama match, grab the other's head and begin pummelling each other with vicious, rapid right hands. As the crowd roars on, both men go for a headbutt--connecting when they least expect it. Shane recovers first and clobbers Chaz with a big boot to the chest. Chaz bounces into the ropes from the blow. Shane wings Chaz away with an Irish whip and ducks down to hit the returning foe with a back body drop. Since this hasn't worked regularly since the mid-90's, Chaz sees this and nails the Celtic Giant with a running DDT, putting both men on the floor.*

Jeannie: I love this, I so love this--omigod, Chaz is coming this way!
Tom: Very observant, Jeannie, Chaz Stone is rolling out of the ring, looking for something under the ring now--what's he got in his hand there?
Jeannie: Why do I care?! He's right there--I could touch him!
Tom: Not the best idea right now, I think. I think that's a steel chain he's wrapping around his hand.

*Shane stumbles over to the ropes and grabs a big handful of Chaz's hair to get his attention. Chaz responds unkindly by turning around and smashing his loaded fist into Shane's abdomen. Shane buckles over and backs away from the ropes, giving Chaz time to climb onto the apron. The big Scot re-wraps the chain so it's around his whole arm, then judges his opponent's distance from the ropes. Chaz leaps onto the top rope and bounds off, crashing into his Irish foe with a springboard chain-assisted lariat that floors both men again. Chaz might have had some blood in his eye when he jumped, as he caught Shane in the chest, not the throat. This difference of a few inches allows Shane to get up first, the blood rushing from Chaz's head slowing his recovery down significantly. Shane picks his opponent off the ground and works on that head wound from earlier with a few punches to the forehead. Chaz takes the abuse, waiting for an opening. Shane starts giving him the badmouth, and Chaz cuts him short with a European uppercut--while still holding the chain around his bicep. The blow snaps the Irishman's head toward the ceiling, which Chaz takes advantage of by swinging a backfist at Shane. Shane has the wherewithall to duck in time, but can't duck the incoming reverse lariat. The Scotsman drives his beefy arm into the back of Shane's neck, sending him to the floor with a cacophonous crash.*

Chaz: *To the referee* Count 'im, lad.
Referee: 1! *Chaz rolls out of the ring, headed to the stands.* 2! *Chaz gets a water bottle from a fan and rinses the blood off of his face.* 3! *Chaz hurriedly grabs the steel steps from earlier and shoves them into the ring.*
Tom: Looks like Chaz is using his time wisely, recovering and setting up for the next move.
Referee: 4!
Jeannie: He's so smart...*dreamy sigh*
Referee: 5! *Shane begins to stir.* 6! *Chaz re-enters the ring, setting himself up in the corner opposite of Shane.* 7! *Shane grabs hold of a discarded steel chair to support himself as he rises.* 8!

*Shane makes it to his feet fully. Chaz is off like a shot, looking for the spear. What he gets is a shoulder full of turnbuckle, as Shane moves away from the guided missle of a man aimed directly at him at the last second. Taking advantage of the situation, Shane blasts his foe in the back with the chair in his hands. This sends the Tower of Power into the turnbuckle, where Shane wallops him again with the seating implement, this time in the back of the head. Shane discards the chair and picks Chaz up into a Torture Rack, crushing the Scotsman's ribs and spine while letting him go limp from the pain and the blood loss. Chaz is showing little resistance after about a minute, the blood flowing off his face grotesquely and pooling at Shane's feet. Shane gets bored of the hold and, convinced Chaz isn't getting back up after this crunch, decides to seal the deal. Swinging Chaz's legs over his head, Shane brutally drops Chaz on his worked-over back with a swift spinebuster.*

Jeannie: GO SHANE!
Tom: Unwise move there--looks like the spinebuster actually woke Chaz back up!
Jeannie: What, he'd passed out and the sudden shock brought him back?
Tom: Something like that, since he's rolling around now.
Jeannie: Awesome! More hot Celt-on-Celt action for me!
Tom: Jeannie, matches like this can shorten a man's career! Don't you care about that?
Jeannie: Only if it affects them in the sack.
Tom: Ye of the one-track mind, let ye be silenced.

*Shane doesn't seem to mind that Chaz is still squirming around. Shane steps on Chaz's throat to the boos of the crowd, even flipping them the deuce. Shane picks his foe up off the mat and throws him back down with a release Gal-A-Way Slam. Shane is fully in the driver's seat when he spies the steel chain Chaz discarded earlier. Recalling the pain that chain put him through, he grins wickedly and picks it up. He walks over to Chaz, sits on his chest, and starts beating him with a steel-wrapped fist while the crowd boos him on. Shane abandons this plan of attack soon, preferring to grind the weapon into Chaz's wound instead. The Irishman stands up and waits for his prey to stand back up, wrapping the chain around his own arm. Chaz woozily stands up, but as Shane goes in for the finishing blow with a chain-assisted lariat, he ducks under the strike and grabs his larger foe by the waist, mustering a reserve of power and driving him onto the steel chair with a Homicide Unit Backdrop! The audience can tell Chaz is getting fired up again as he shakes the ropes and yells to their pleasure, but his flame is extinguished when he turns around to see the steel steps, being swung by Shane Malone, bringing to bear against his skull. The sick sound of steel on bone rings throughout the arena as Chaz Stone slumps to the ground, nearly unconscious.*

Jeannie: Ball game, Tom. What a gruesome end to a gruesome match.
Referee: 1! 2! 3! 4! *Shane walks away, basking in the boos from the crowd.*
Tom: What a hell of a match we have just witnessed. Both men fought valiantly, but it looks like Shane Malone is the true Celtic Giant in W*I*G.
Referee: 5! *Chaz begins to stir, grabbing the bottom rope for support.* 6! 7! *Chaz crawls up to the second rope, heaving for breath.* 8! 9!

*Chaz finally makes it to his feet again. The crowd's cheers are short-lived, as Shane clocks Chaz with the steel chair again. Chaz doesn't have the time to fall down before the Celtic Giant slaps on an Iron Claw. Shane pushes towards the steel steps, giving Chaz such a hard time that we simply cannot hear at present over the crowd. Team Ireland's enforcer signals for the Giant's Causeway to end this match, then pauses to harangue Chaz one last time before his big ride. Clearly, Chaz has heard enough, as he retaliates with a tight goozle. Whether Shane's eyes bugging out is an effect of the harsh manipulation of his cartorid artery or his sheer shock at Chaz's fortitude matters little, as the lack of blood flow to his head forces him to drop the clawhold and pant for precious breath. Chaz's face is a mask of crimson fury, his teeth gritted as he heaves his opponent into the air and smashes him to the mat with a chokeslam. Still holding that chokehold, Chaz shoulders Shane into a fireman's carry, then starts spinning counterclockwise like a gyro.*

Tom: Airplane spin? This is a new one from Chaz, but it'll hurt him more than it'll hurt Shane at this point. What is he doing?
Jeannie: He may be going delusional on us, Tom.

*Just then, Chaz releases Shane's head, but holds onto his leg, sending Shane to the mat with a thunderous flapjack that drops him face-first onto the wasted chair. The crowd goes wild for the big move.*

Jeannie: Ooooor he could be going for a big throw after all.
Tom: He's got to be dizzy after that move. Wait, he sees the steel steps...I don't like that look on his face, Jeannie.
Jeannie: He can't! He doesn't have the strength left in his body to do what I think he wants here!
Tom: Nevertheless, he's got Shane again--pulling with all his might, but Shane's not budging.
Chaz: RAAAAAUGH!
Tom: Great Scot! He's got Shane up for the Edinburgh Crush! How did he do it!?!
Chaz: ALBA GU BRATH!

*With one shout, Chaz smashes the Irishman's massive frame chest-first into the steel ring steps. Shane hits in such a way that his chest hits the top step, but his forehead hits the bottom step. The crowd goes bananas for the finisher, and while you could practically hear the "KO" sound from the ring, the referee still has to make sure one man can get up. Chaz looks like something from a horror movie, while Shane appears to have crumpled in on himself, so the possibility of a double knockout is a real, and very lame, one.*

Referee: 1!
2!
3!
4!
5!
6! *Chaz, once seated, climbs to his knees, still breathing hard.*
7! *Shane pushes himself off the steps by his arms.*
8!
9! *Chaz makes it to his feet. Shane tries to follow, but simply cannot muster the arm strength to make it up, and flops dramatically to the ground.*
10!

*Ding ding ding!*

Finkel: The winner of the match, and the winner of the Celtic Championship Series, by a 4-3 count...the Tower of Power, CHAAAAZ STOOOOONE!

*Chaz, now leaning against the ropes, smiles for the first time since the match got underway. He weakly throws up a Maloik while the referee holds up his other arm. Chaz is panting heavily, bleeding profusely, and looks like he's just had the time of his life. "School's Out" begins blaring over the speaker system as the crowd goes wild.*

Tom: I know not if he's of Viking stock, but Chaz looks to be in Valhalla right now.
Jeannie: He looks really worse for the wear, though--I should go comfort him.
Tom: Jeannie, you stay right here.
Jeannie: You are officially no fun, Tom.
Tom: Well, there you have it! Chaz Stone is the CCS champion, and has a big bragging point over Team Ireland as well, but the cleanup on this match is NOT going to be fun.
Jeannie: We should take a commercial break and let the roadies get to that, then.
Tom: Yes let's.

*As Chaz walkes to his bike and starts it with a mighty roar, the screen fades to black.*

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

Howard Finkel: The following contest is the Acropolis of Bewilderment Match.

*The sound of a slightly muffled guitar riff is heard before a record scratch. Then "Caboose" gets into full swing. The Maxx is standing at the entranceway with a single fist raised in the air, his head bowed & his legs spread apart. He is dressed this evening in Navy Blue & Aqua attire as well as a sleeveless T-shirt with a large picture of his own face on it. His ever-present fedora & doo-rag completing the look. He's carrying a microphone in his hand.*

Finkel: Introducing first, from Atlantic City, New Jersey, weighing in at 215lbs... THE MAXX!

*The Maxx carries on down the ramp a little bit before he stops bends at the waist before raising his fist high again. At this point he waits for the audience to fall into silence.*

The Maxx: As an invitee of the Acropolis of Bewilderment, I have not experienced all the delights it has to offer, yet there is one contest revered above all there: The traditional Acropolis of Bewilderment Match, a match which now, you lowly peons will be afforded the opportunity to see. Yet, there is only one man in all of wrestling who can possibly show you just exactly what is entailed in the mighty duels we have witnessed in the Acropolis, ladies & gentlemen, allow me to introduce... From the Acropolis of Bewilderment by way of San Diego, California, being accompanied by the Goddesses of Gorgeousness, weighing in at an incredibly well-sculpted two-hundred & forty-two punds... The one.. The ONLY... JAMES... BON... JOVI!!!

*"Bad Medicine" kicks in, but James Bon Jovi does not appear at the entranceway as he usually does. Instead, James is marched out on a couch of sorts, carried by six scantily-clad, slender, but well-built, women. Coming up behind them is another couch, being carried by more of these slave-girls, presumably the "Goddesses of Gorgeousness" whom The Maxx mentioned in his introduction. This second couch is set down at the entranceway as The Maxx climbs onto it. The six girls then also transport him down to the ring. The audience boos & jeers this gratuitous display as The Maxx & Bon Jovi enjoy reclining on thse couches before their match.*

Jeannie: Oh, to be one of those girls...

*Bon Jovi & The Maxx dismount the couches & stand on the ring apron before entering the ring & scaling adjacent turnbuckles. Bon Jovi raises an arm in thae air & flicks his luxurious hair back as The Maxx bends at the waist again, raising one gloved fist in the air. Bioth men then discard their ring attire & wait for the arrival of their opponents.*

Tom Bailey: I’m excited for this match, mainly because I want to know just what the hell an Acropolis of Bewilderment Match is.

Jeannie Lawless: You don’t know!?

Tom: No.

Jeannie: But, you’re supposed to be the big wrestling expert, like Jim Ross.

Tom: Well, excuse me. I’ve never seen this gimmick match before. It’s brand new!

Jeannie: Yeah, well, you could have asked James Bon Jovi or The Maxx what the rules are.

Tom: I tried, but you kept hogging all the time with them. Speaking of which, did you find out what the rules of this match are?

Jeannie: Um…well…it…um…slipped my mind.

*The Latin Lover’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2M9YHATH2Q

Finkel: Coming down the aisle, at a combined weight of 522 pounds, from Wherever There Is Love—Guillermo Miramontes and Casimiro Melendez, THE LATIN LOVERS.

*The Latin Lovers come out to a nice pop from the ladies. The men give out a few more cheers than usual for the Lovers. Guillermo has on black wrestling trunks with “Te quiero” in white on the butt, black elbow pads with a white heart on them, knee pads with black hearts on them, and white boots with “GM” in black on them. Casimiro has on black tights with “Catalina” in white on the butt, black elbow pads with white hearts on them, knee pads with black hearts on them, and white boots with “CM” in black on them. As they walk to the ring, a pair of panties comes flying towards them and hits Casimiro in the face. He grabs them and stuffs them in his tights. They enter the ring, and each one climbs onto the corners facing the Colvintron. They both blow a kiss to the crowd, and then some pyro goes off, creating a heart design.*

Tom: And, here come the Latin Lovers.

Jeannie: Man, I love it when these for men come together. If I only I was in the middle…

Tom: Well, anyway, this should be an exciting encounter. With The Maxx and Bon Jovi picking the match, they have the advantage. But, since the Lovers have gotten the better of them the other times they’ve wrestled, this match could go either way.

Jeannie: Stop it, Maxx! I’m ticklish!

Tom: Great! She’s fantasizing. I’ll just leave her be until she’s about to say something vulgar.

*The bell rings. Guillermo and Bon Jovi move to the apron. Casimiro and The Maxx circle each other and then tie up. The Maxx quickly locks Casimiro into a headlock. He wrenches Casimiro’s head a few times as he moves down onto one knee. After a few seconds, Casimiro is able to push The Maxx up onto his feet and into the ropes. They bounce off the ropes, and Casimiro throws The Maxx off of him. The Maxx runs across the ring and bounces off the opposite ropes. Casimiro charges at him, but The Maxx knocks him to the mat with a shoulder block. Casimiro lays on the mat, rolling around holding his shoulder. It appears he’s injured. The Maxx devilishly smiles. He runs to the ropes, bounces off of them, and runs to Casimiro. However, Casimiro was playing possum. He rolls toward The Maxx, trying to trip him. But, The Maxx notices and jumps over Casimiro. He hits the opposite ropes and charges at Casimiro as he kips up. However, Casimiro leap frogs The Maxx. The Maxx turns around as Casimiro runs to the ropes and bounces off of them. He charges at The Maxx, but The Maxx catches him and lifts him up for a flapjack. Unfortunately for The Maxx, Casimiro counters with a dropkick. The Maxx rolls over onto his feet. Casimiro kips up. They charge at each other. And, Casimiro hits The Maxx with a reverse lungblower. The Maxx hits the mat, and Casimiro covers him for a pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*The Maxx kicks out.*

Tom: 100 Years Of Solitude early in the match! But too early as The Maxx kicks out.

Jeannie: Yeah! Right there, Casimiro. I like it like that.

*Casimiro picks up The Maxx. Suddenly, The Maxx surprises him with a punch. He goes for another one, but Casimiro grabs his arm and locks him into an armbar. He wrenches on The Maxx’s arm a few times. Then, he drops down and sweeps The Maxx’s legs. The Maxx sits up, holding his head. Suddenly, Casimiro runs to the ropes and tries to charge at The Maxx, but Bon Jovi takes a swing at him. Casimiro turns around, punches Bon Jovi, grabs him by his head, and smashes him into the top turnbuckle. Bon Jovi bounces off the turnbuckle. Then, Casimiro dropkicks Bon Jovi, knocking him off the apron. Suddenly, The Maxx charges at Casimiro; but Casimiro back body drops him over the top rope and onto Bon Jovi. As Bon Jovi and The Maxx get up on the outside, Guillermo enters the ring. The Lovers move to the far side of the ring and wait for The Maxx and Bon Jovi to get up. They finally do, and the Lovers run across the ring, jump through the second and top ropes, and hit Bon Jovi and The Maxx with a pair of suicide dives into the steel guardrails. The crowd cheers as the Lovers jump up and gloat.*

Tom: Stereo suicide dives from the Latin Lovers! And, the crowd is lovin’ the Lovers.

Jeannie: Oh, Guillermo. Don’t stop. Don’t stop!!!!

Tom: Apparently, so is Jeannie.

*The ref begins a ten count.*

Ref: 1…*Guillermo and Casimiro pick up Bon Jovi and The Maxx respectively.*

2…*Guillermo hits Bon Jovi with a few chops as Casimiro punches The Maxx in the head.*

3…*Suddenly, Bon Jovi starts fighting back with some chops of his own. Meanwhile, Casimiro punches The Maxx a few more times and then whips him into the ring apron.*

4…*Guillermo suddenly punches Bon Jovi. Bon Jovi punches back. Meanwhile, Casimiro hits The Maxx in the back with several forearm shots.*

5…*Bon Jovi starts punching Guillermo toward the ring. Then, he lunches at Guillermo’s eyes, trying to rake them; but Guillermo grabs his hands and holds him back. Meanwhile, Casimiro grabs The Maxx and throws him back first into the steel guardrail.*

6…*Bon Jovi and Guillermo are still struggling with each other. Soon they roll back into the ring. The ref stops counting to break them apart and get them to their respective corners.*

*Meanwhile, Casimiro clotheslines The Maxx over the guardrail. Casimiro then reaches over the guardrail to pick up the Maxx, but the Maxx rakes Casimiro’s eyes. Casimiro spins around, holding his eye and shaking his head. He looks unaffected and turns around to punch The Maxx. However, The Maxx has grabbed a chair from a fan. He holds it up, and Casimiro ends up punching it. The crowd lets out a sympathetic groan as Casimiro holds his injured hand.*

Tom: Good Golly Miss Molly! Casimiro Melendez goes for a punch, but The Maxx holds up a chair; and Casimiro hits it instead! I can’t believe that The Maxx is resorting to cheating this early in the match!

Jeannie: Oh, Bon Jovi. You DON’T give love a bad name.

Tom: Okay, I better stop this. She could go all night. JEANNIE!

Jeannie: WHAT!?

Tom: There’s a match going on!

Jeannie: I know that! I was…uh…calling the action!

Tom: Right.

Jeannie: What happened to Casimiro’s hand?

Tom: He punched a chair.

Jeannie: Well, that wasn’t very smart.

*As Casimiro looks at his hand, The Maxx climbs onto the guardrail, jumps off, and hits Casimiro with a double axe handle. Casimiro falls to his knees. The Maxx then picks up Casimiro and throws him into the guardrail. Casimiro falls to the floor, and The Maxx walks over, puts his foot onto Casimiro’s neck, and chokes him with it. The referee doesn’t see this because he too busy with Guillermo and Bon Jovi, still fighting in the ring. Guillermo has now rolled over on top of Bon Jovi and his punching him mercilessly. Bon Jovi covers up, using his arms to block the punches. The Maxx stops choking Casimiro after several seconds and stomps on him a few times. Then, he picks up Casimiro and throws him back into the ring. The Maxx enters the ring. He runs over to Guillermo and grabs him by his hair, pulling Guillermo off of his partner. Bon Jovi gets up, shaking his head. Then, Bon Jovi turns around and hits Guillermo in the stomach with a hard punch. Guillermo bends over, with The Maxx still holding onto his hair. The ref warns Bon Jovi to leave, but Bon Jovi just brushes him aside. He runs to the ropes as The Maxx pulls Guillermo back up and then bounces off of them and charges at Guillermo. The Maxx lets go of Guillermo, and Bon Jovi hits him with a wheel kick that sends Guillermo flying to the ropes; Guillermo falls between them and to the outside.*

Tom: The Maxx saves his partner, and James Bon Jovi sends Guillermo Miramontes out of the ring with a wheel kick.

Jeannie: Dammit, Maxx! Not the hair! Leave Guillermo’s hair alone!

*The ref yells at Bon Jovi and The Maxx for disobeying him, but they just ignore him. Suddenly, Casimiro gets up and charges at Bon Jovi and The Maxx, hoping to hit The Maxx from behind and send him into Bon Jovi. However, Bon Jovi sees him and pushes The Maxx out of the way. Then, Bon Jovi ducks and picks up Casimiro on his shoulders in an Alabama Slam position. The Maxx turns around and sees Bon Jovi holding Casimiro. He charges at them and grabs Casimiro for a "Maxximyzer." Both men drop Casimiro to the mat simultaneously.*

Tom: Hypebomb from The Maxx and Bon Jovi. Things don’t bode well for Casimiro in the early going.

Jeannie: Damn! They could wrap this match up early.

Tom: I hope not. We still haven’t seen what makes this match unique.

Jeannie: Yeah. It just looks like a regular match.

Tom: Seriously! Where’s the gimmick!?

*Bon Jovi exits the ring as The Maxx stomps on Casimiro a few times. Then, he drops a leg onto Casimiro and locks him into a scissored armbar. The Maxx pulls back onto the hand that Casimiro punched the chair with. He soon stars punching Casimiro’s hand as he pulls back on the injured body part. Casimiro yells out in pain. The referee checks on Casimiro seeing if he wants to give up. Casimiro does not, expressing so with a “No!” Suddenly, Guillermo gets up on the outside. He climbs up onto the apron, climbs up to the top turnbuckle of a neutral corner, jumps off, and lands on The Maxx with a frog splash, causing The Maxx to leg go of the hold. The crowd cheers at Guillermo’s save as he starts punching The Maxx. Bon Jovi enters the ring to pull Guillermo off of his partner. Guillermo sees this and exits the ring. The referee holds Bon Jovi back as he yells at Guillermo, who just holds his arms up and feigns innocence.*

Tom: Nice save from Guillermo Miramontes!

Jeannie: He’s taking some initiative. Most guys would have just cheered their partners on, but Guillermo knows that actions are little more effective than words.

*The referee pulls Bon Jovi from the ropes and gets him to move back to his corner. Guillermo also moves back to his corner. In the ring, The Maxx gets up, shaking his head. Casimiro is sitting up on the mat, holding his arm. The Maxx charges at Casimiro, but Casimiro surprises him with a punch to the stomach with his good hand. He punches The Maxx a few more times, allowing him to get up and send The Maxx reeling back. Suddenly, Casimiro hits The Maxx with a dropkick, knocking Casimiro back into the ropes. Casimiro gets up as The Maxx bounces off the ropes. He charges at The Maxx, but The Maxx tilt-a-whirls around him and hits Casimiro with the Stroke. He then covers Casimiro for a pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*Casimiro gets a shoulder.*

Tom: Ode To The Chosen One stops Casimiro from getting the advantage over The Maxx. But, it doesn’t stop the match.

Jeannie: Damn! The Maxx can really move. I’d like to see him move around me. Oh yeah. Tilt-a-whirl me, Maxx

Tom: JEANNIE!!!! HELLO!!!! PAY-PER-VIEW GOING ON!!!!

Jeannie: Dammit! You never let me have any fun!

*The Maxx picks up Casimiro, throws him into his team’s corner, and tags in Bon Jovi. Bon Jovi climbs up to the top turnbuckle as The Maxx holds Casimiro in an abdominal stretch. Bon Jovi then hits Casimiro in the stomach with a fist drop. Casimiro falls to his knees. The Maxx exits the ring as Bon Jovi punches Casimiro in the head a few times. A really hard punch sends Casimiro to the mat. Then, Bon Jovi drops an elbow onto Casimiro. He gets up and hits Casimiro with another elbow drop. Bon Jovi gets up again and hits Casimiro with a third elbow drop. Bon Jovi gets up again; this time, he picks up Casimiro and throws him into a neutral corner. Bon Jovi hits Casimiro with an elbow strike and then goes after the injured hand. He punches on it and bites it. The ref tries to pull Bon Jovi off of Casimiro and then goes for a five count.*

Ref: 1…2…3…4…*Bon Jovi lets go of Casimiro’s hand.*

*Then, Bon Jovi grabs Casimiro and whips him across the ring. Casimiro hits the opposite corner hard, bouncing out of it. Bon Jovi quickly charges at Casimiro and hits him with a running lariat, squashing him back into the corner. Bon Jovi then drops to the mat and rolls Casimiro over into a schoolboy pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*Casimiro kicks out.*

Tom: Bon Jovi goes for a pin, but he can’t keep Casimiro down.

Jeannie: For now. Casimiro needs to tag out, because I doubt he can keep it up, especially with a hurt hand.

*Bon Jovi gets up and angrily stomps on Casimiro’s hurt hand. Then, he pulls Casimiro over to his corner by his hurt hand. Bon Jovi tags in The Maxx. Bon Jovi holds him, and The Maxx drops a knee onto Casimiro’s stomach. Bon Jovi lets go and moves onto the apron. Casimiro sits up, and The Maxx punches him in the back of the head a few times. Then, he grabs Casimiro by his head and turns him around onto his knees. Suddenly, Casimiro thrusts his head into The Maxx’s stomach. The Maxx retaliates with a knee to the face. Casimiro falls to the mat, and The Maxx pulls Casimiro up. The Maxx pushes Casimiro back into a neutral corner and goes after that hand, punching it several times. Then, The Maxx whips Casimiro into the opposite corner, running behind him as well. Casimiro bounces out of the corner as The Maxx hits the ropes adjacent to the turnbuckle. He goes for a bulldog, but Casimiro surprises him by picking The Maxx up and throwing him into the corner they were previously at. The Maxx hits the top turnbuckle, stratling the top rope for a second before falling to the mat. Casimiro has also fallen to the mat.*

Tom: Sweet Nancy With The Old King Clancy! Casimiro counters a bulldog from The Maxx by throwing him into the corner!

Jeannie: Old King Clancy? I’ve done that one!

Tom: One what?

Jeannie: Um…nevermind. *pause* By the way, I had no idea you were Canadian…or a freak.

Tom: What?

Jeannie: Nothing.

*Both men are down on the mat. The ref begins a count.*

Ref: 1…*Both men writhe in pain.*

2…*Bon Jovi reaches out to The Maxx for a tag. Guillermo starts clapping, cheering Casimiro on.*

3…*A few ladies in the audience pick up the clapping.*

4…*The clapping gets louder and louder.*

5…*The clapping is deafening. Bon Jovi does look pleased with it and yells at the audience.*

6…*The clapping picks up speed as Casimiro rolls over to his corner. Guillermo holds his arm out for a tag.*

7…*Suddenly, Casimiro jumps up and tags in Guillermo.*

*The ladies go wild as Guillermo jumps onto the top rope, jumps off, and lands on The Maxx with a senton as he stands up. Guillermo gets up and runs to the ropes. He bounces off of them as The Maxx gets up. Guillermo charges at The Maxx and hits him with a running single knee facebreaker. The Maxx lands on the mat but gets right back up. Guillermo kips up, grabs The Maxx, and hits him with an underarm snap STO.*

Tom: Aci Nacemos to The Maxx!

Jeannie: Casimiro tagged in at the right time.

*Guillermo gets up and runs to the ropes. He bounces off of them and charges at The Maxx as The Maxx gets up. The Maxx surprises him with a clothesline. Guillermo hits the mat, and The Maxx runs to the ropes. He jumps on them and bounces off with a springboard moonsault, but Guillermo rolls out of the way. The Maxx manages to land on his feet. Guillermo gets up, jumps onto the ropes, and hits The Maxx with a springboard moonsault of his own. He stays on The Maxx for a pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*Bon Jovi rushes into the ring and breaks up the pin.*

*Bon Jovi punches Guillermo a few times and then picks him up. He then tries to whip Guillermo into the ropes, but Guillermo hangs onto Bon Jovi’s arm, rolls under him, pulls Bon Jovi in, and hits him with a crossed-arm scoop brainbuster.*

Tom: Zärtlichkeiten to Bon Jovi! That will show him not to interfere in the match!

Jeannie: I doubt it.

Tom: What makes you say that?

Jeannie: Because, that would be stupid!

*Guillermo gets up, picks up Bon Jovi, and throws him out of the ring. Then, he turns his attention to The Maxx as he gets up. Guillermo goes for a lungblower, but The Maxx hits him with an elbow. The Maxx turns around, grabs Guillermo by his legs, and sweeps his legs, sending Guillermo to the mat. The Maxx tries to roll Guillermo over into a Boston crab, but Guillermo manages to keep from being rolled over. Then, he pulls The Maxx in toward him and starts punching him in the head. However, The Maxx surprises him with a catapult into the corner. But, Guillermo manages to leap onto the second turnbuckle. The Maxx gets up and turns around. And, Guillermo jumps off, hitting The Maxx with a back elbow smash. He covers The Maxx for a pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*The Maxx kicks out.*

Jeannie: Damn! He is on fire! Which, isn’t that much of a surprise. Guillermo is always smokin’.

Tom: Really? Smokin’? Can’t you be a little cleverer with your compliments?

Jeannie: Can’t you be a little cleverer with your exclamations?

Tom: Oh. Touché.

*Guillermo gets up, backs into the ropes, and bounces off of them. Guillermo charges at The Maxx as he gets up. However, The Maxx stops him with a dropkick. Guillermo falls to the mat, and The Maxx runs over to his corner. Bon Jovi gets up and moves to his corner to make the tag with The Maxx. Bon Jovi enters the ring, charges at Guillermo as he gets up, and hits him with a spear. Bon Jovi gets up and picks up Guillermo. He backs Guillermo into the ropes and tries to whip him across the ring, but Guillermo reverses it, sending Bon Jovi into the ropes. As Bon Jovi hits the ropes, Casimiro kicks Bon Jovi in the back. Casimiro grabs Bon Jovi by his hair, but Bon Jovi hits him with an elbow. Casimiro lets go of Bon Jovi, and Bon Jovi turns around and punches him. Casimiro falls to the floor. Bon Jovi turns around and is met by Guillermo, who grabs Bon Jovi and hits him with a Northern lights suplex followed by an over the shoulder belly to back piledriver. Guillermo covers him for a pin.*

Ref: 1…2…*The Maxx runs into the ring and stops the pin!

Tom: Guillermo hits Bon Jovi with A Flor De Piel. He goes for the pin. Dammit! The Maxx breaks it up!

Jeannie: Damn! These guys are really firing up! Is it hot in here, or am I sexually aroused?

Tom: Dear God.

*The Maxx gets up and grabs Guillermo by his hair. Suddenly, Casimiro runs into the ring and spears The Maxx. The Maxx rolls all the way to the outside. Casimiro gets up and moves back to the ropes. He waits for The Maxx to get up. He does, and Casimiro runs across the ring, jumps onto the top rope, and lands on The Maxx with a no-handed springboard suicide drive. The crowd cheers after seeing the move.*

Tom: Oingo Boingo! Leaf Storm to The Maxx on the outside!

Jeannie: Casimiro’s making sure The Maxx stays out of the match.

*Casimiro gets up and backs up towards the ring. Unfortunately, he doesn’t see Bon Jovi getting up and walking over to the ropes. Bon Jovi reaches over the top rope, grabs Casimiro by his hair, and pulls him up onto the apron, one hand reaching into his pants. However, Casimiro surprises Bon Jovi jumping down and hitting him with a hangman. Bon Jovi bounces up, holding his throat, and turns right around into Guillermo’s waiting arms. He goes to grab Bon Jovi who now pulls the hand out of his pants, decking Guillermo with a punch that sends Miramontes crumpling down to the mat instantly. James puts his other hand over his face, making an “Oops!” expression as the referee examines his hand. The camera zooms in on Bon Jovi, showing a pair of brass knuckles wrapped around his fingers. The referee turns around and calls for the bell, but as he does so, James Bon Jovi slides out of the ring and grabs a microphone before any other announcement can be made.*

DING DING DING!

Bon Jovi: HERE ARE YOUR WINNERS…NOOOOOBODYYY!

Tom: What the hell just happened here?

Jeannie: I’m confused.

*Casimiro is in the ring, helping his partner recuperate as James Bon Jovi directs his words to them.*

Bon Jovi: If I can clarify, ladies and gentlemen…In an Acropolis of Bewilderment Rules match, there is not just one round of competition, but more! With that in mind, the second round of this match…which ACTUALLY began five minutes ago, and is contested under NO DISQUALIFICATION rules…is well under way! Therefore this match will continue…AS IS!

*The crowd boos loudly in disapproval, especially given the nature of the announcement.*

Jeannie: That explains him blatantly using the brass knucks in front of the referee! It was part of the match all along!

Tom: That or he’s just plain stupid.

Jeannie: Stupid? It takes a great mind to be able to create AND regulate a match that’s under Acropolis of Bewilderment Rules.

*At that, a now-standing Maxx reaches under the ring, pulling steel chair out from under it as the still-armed James Bon Jovi storms the ring from the other side. Casimiro charges at the now-entering Bon Jovi, hitting him with forearm after forearm before James can even get to his feet and continue the assault, Guillermo hauling himself up to his feet with the help of the ropes, a hand over his head, still feeling that punch with the brass knuckles. Casimiro continues to hammer away at James Bon Jovi, but now the Maxx, who slides into the ring, runs at him from behind, hitting him in the back of the head with the steel chair, knocking him down. The Maxx grabs James by an arm, pulling him up to his feet as the two turn their attention to the still-dazed Miramontes, each turning their heads towards each other, grinning and nodding their heads. The Maxx gestures at Guillermo, as James runs towards him, kicking him in the side of the ribs and knocking him back down as The Maxx horizontally wedges the chair between the turnbuckles in the corner. James Bon Jovi picks Guillermo up by the head and whips him into the corner, sending him colliding back-first against the steel chair. James backpedals a few steps before running full-speed, lowering his head and executing a Runaway Spear right into the corner! Only Guillermo has ducked out of the way, and instead of sandwiching the Latin Lover into solid steel, James Bon Jovi ricochets off of the chair and collapses to the mat. The Maxx scrambles for Guillermo, grabbing him by the head, turning him around and hitting him with another Maxximyzer to take him down.*

Tom: What a Maxximyzer! Things were looking GREAT for the Latin Lovers earlier, but unfortunately, the tide seems to have turned for now.

Jeannie: They’ve clearly been outsmarted.

Tom: You mean like James Bon Jovi and how he just ran into that chair?

Jeannie: …no comment.

*Just as The Maxx gets up, Casimiro launches himself at him; The Maxx grabs the now-dented steel chair, holding it up like before, only this time, Casimiro stops himself, pausing briefly before dropping down and kicking The Maxx in the shins and sending him falling backwards. Casimiro Melendez quickly picks up the Maxx, pulling him towards a corner and throwing him into it face first, grabbing his head and repeatedly slamming it into the top turnbuckle. After eight such slams, Casimiro pulls him away and whips him into the ropes. As The Maxx comes rebounding off the ropes, Casimiro grabs him, lifting him up and executing a Northern Lights suplex. The Maxx lands on his feet, however, instead of his back and slowly pushes himself up to his feet, Casimiro still holding the waistlock in. The Maxx breaks free, turning around behind Melendez and grabbing his arms, turning them about and applying a crossface chickenwing.*

Tom: Chickenwing! Melendez going for a Northern Lights suplex but The Maxx counters with a crossface chicken wing!

Jeannie: I wouldn’t mind him going crossface on me….

*Casimiro Melendez struggles to get out of the hold, trying to break it with pure force. The Maxx slowly begins to cinch the hold in, Casimiro still fighting to break out. He begins to waver, his movements slowing down as The Maxx continues to keep the chicken wing held in firmly. Suddenly, Guillermo shoots up to his feet, running towards The Maxx and hitting him in the back with a forearm, causing him to break the hold instantly as Casimiro goes falling towards the ropes which he grabs on to. As The Maxx turns around to face him, Guillermo kicks him in the stomach, doubling him over, and picks him up, turning him vertically and executing a shoulder breaker. Guillermo falls back into a seated position, still winded from earlier, and leans over, hooking a leg of The Maxx as he goes for the pin.*

Tom: Shoulder breaker! Will that do it?!

1!




2!




JAMES BON JOVI BREAKS IT UP!

*A double axe-handle from Bon Jovi stops the pin attempt flat, as James Bon Jovi—brass knuckles still in hand—picks Guillermo Miramontes up and pushes him into the nearest corner, unloading a barrage of stiff, clenched-fist punches on the chest and abdomen of Guillermo. Miramontes, gasping for breath from the brass-fisted punches, is picked up with a hanging vertical suplex. James Bon Jovi shuffles towards the edge of the ring, looking to dump him over the ropes, but Casimiro Melendez pushes himself off of the nearby ropes, running at Bon Jovi and forearming him in the back, causing him to stumble forward and lower Miramontes before he can toss him over. Guillermo drops onto the apron in front of James Bon Jovi, punching him in the head and lifting the glam rocker up with a suplex of his own. Just as Guillermo lifts him up, The Maxx comes running towards the three of them from the other side of the ring. Guillermo shouts for Casimiro to turn to face him, who does so, throwing a wide clothesline. The Maxx slides right underneath it, avoiding it entirely as he takes one leg out from under Guillermo with a baseball slide. The Maxx slides right out of the ring behind Miramontes, who, falling forward, is forced to release Bon Jovi back to a standing position inside the ring as he himself falls into a seated position on ring apron outside. The Maxx gets to his feet, reaching up and punching away at Guillermo’s head. Miramontes retaliates, keeping The Maxx at bay with some downward-reaching punches of his own.*

Tom: I can safely say now that all hell has broken loose in this match, and there isn’t anything that can stop it at this point!

Jeannie: Especially not in the ring…

*Meanwhile, James Bon Jovi and Casimiro Melendez have been trading shots with one another. The dented chair from earlier is in Casimiro’s hands, being used as a shield from the punches of the brass-knuckled hand of James Bon Jovi. Bon Jovi throws a wide hook at Casimiro’s head, causing him to put the chair in front of his face as the metal-on-metal collision makes an audible crash. James pulls his hand out of a freshly-made dent, throwing another big punch in at Melendez’s head, which is once again blocked as a new dent is made in the already-pockmarked chair. Casimiro slams the chair at the head of Bon Jovi, who pulls himself out of the way with not a second to spare. James grabs the chair with his free hand, pulling it to the side as he hits Casimiro in the chest with another heavy punch. Casimiro collapses to the mat, the wind knocked out of him, but is able to roll out of the ring before James Bon Jovi can drop down and go for a cover. James rolls out of the ring and picks Casimiro up by the head, hitting him in the head with a side elbow before rearing an arm back, throwing another punch. Before the punch can even connect, however, a kick to the arm from underneath by Melendez as sent James Bon Jovi’s weapon of choice flying off his hand and into the crowd nearby.*

Jeannie: What a way to lose the weapon advantage!

Tom: Indeed. Now that those brass knuckles are off the fists of James Bon Jovi, the playing field between those two has been significantly evened up. And it was a brilliant move by Melendez to roll out of the ring when he did—had he not, he might not still be in this match.

*On the other side of the ring, facing the stage, Guillermo Miramontes is still on the apron, trading punches with The Maxx. Guillermo gets the advantage, sending The Maxx staggering back with a particularly strong punch, before pulling himself up to his feet on the apron with the aid of the ropes. Miramontes jumps off the apron, hitting The Maxx with a double axe handle before dragging him by his head towards the ring. Guillermo slams the head of The Maxx into the ring apron, before pulling his head back up and executing another head slam into the apron. Guillermo once more picks his head up off the apron and slams it down, but The Maxx blocks it with his own hands, stopping the slam instantly. He pulls Guillermos’s head back and slams it into the apron, before pulling him away from it, kicking him once in the stomach and rolling the Latin Lover into the ring. The Maxx picks Guillermo up, hitting him with another kick to the abdomen, throwing him into the corner and sitting him up on the top rope. The Maxx makes a very dramatic—and loud—signal, indicating a big move on the way…*

Tom: If The Maxx was any less subtle, he could scream the name of this move and it would NOT be as obvious…

Jeannie: He’s going for Maxximum Impact, isn’t he?!

*The Maxx backs himself up, ascending the turnbuckle and wrapping a three-quarter facelock upon the head of Guillermo Miramontes as he jumps off. Guillermo manages to push him straight off, however, as The Maxx lands face-first, flat on the mat. Guillermo, still dazed, slowly ascends to the very top of the turnbuckle, shaking his head slightly as he wipes the cobwebs out of his head. Once at the top of the turnbuckle, he looks down towards a -recovering- Maxx, who pulls himself up to his feet, ever so slowly, a hand over his face—which has almost certainly had the taste knocked right out of it from that fall. Just as The Maxx turns around, however, Guillermo leaps off the turnbuckle with a Missile Dropkick!*

Tom: Missile Dropki—SHINING WIZARD! SHINING WIZARD!

Jeannie: Oh Lord, I didn’t know that was even physically possible!

Tom: The Maxx executing a jumping Shining Wizard on Guillermo Miramontes as he leapt off for a torpedo dropkick! The coordination that it takes a person to be able to get that sort of move is nothing short of unbelievable!

*Both men are down on the mat, lying on their backs; a leaping Shining Wizard as executed by The Maxx just as Miramontes had gone airborne has stopped the move flat, but both men are in a complete daze. The Maxx crawls over towards Guillermo, draping an arm over his chest as the referee drops down and counts the pin.*

1!




2!




SHOULDER UP!

Tom: Amazing!

Jeannie: What a kickout.

Tom: It just goes to show you that no man in this match is willing to just give it up here tonight…each team has a claim over the other and it’s this match here tonight that’s going to make the difference.

*The Maxx sits himself up, breathing heavily as he argues with the referee over the count. He was quite certain that it had been worth a 3-count, but the referee informs him repeatedly that it was most certainly not. Shaking his head, The Maxx staggers up to his feet, stumbling towards the action that is going on outside between James Bon Jovi and Casimiro Melendez. The two have gotten closer and closer to the commentary tables, the bulky plastic-and-metal, monitor-filled furnishings becoming a focal point between the two. James Bon Jovi whips Casimiro into the Armenian-language commentary table, but Casimiro reverses, sending Bon Jovi slamming into it back-first. On the inside of the ring, Guillermo Miramontes is nearly up to his feet, hanging onto the ropes with a hand on the side of his still-sore head. He walks toward the edge of the ring, getting near it just after The Maxx has rolled to the outside. Casimiro, with James Bon Jovi against the table, unleashes a flurry of quick, nettling chops to the chest, each one progressively reddening the upper torso of the glam rocker more than the last. The Maxx interrupts this, turning Casimiro around and hitting him with a chop of his own. Casimiro responds in kind with another chop, sending The Maxx back a few steps before turning back around to face James Bon Jovi. Casimiro kicks James Bon Jovi in the stomach once, then again. He then grabs James suplex-style, crossing the legs of Bon Jovi as he reaches around and starts to pick him up, an arm hooked around James’ legs. He goes to lift him up, but Bon Jovi fights out of it with a barrage of punches to the ribs. Gradually, Melendez’s grip slips as James pulls himself out, lifting Casimiro up onto his shoulders and falling forward into a seated position as Melendez goes face-first to the floor. James, still in a daze, leans backward, resting on his back with his hands clutching his torso*

Tom: Electric chair facebuster!

Jeannie: He needed to do that…otherwise he’d probably be in trouble right this second.

*Meanwhile, The Maxx has kneed Guillermo Miramontes in the chest, doubling him over before kicking him in the head, sending Guillermo staggering back. Miramontes responds with a pair of forearms, those sending The Maxx back as well. The Maxx throws another kick to send Miramontes back, but Miramontes retaliates with a kick of his own that also sends The Maxx in reeling. Guillermo leans forward, throwing another forearm, but The Maxx dodges back, raking him in the eyes as the audience boos. Miramontes staggers back, and The Maxx whips him in the direction of the timekeeper’s equipment. Guillermo reverses, instead sending The Maxx crashing into the chairs, right into the people seated there who scramble to get out of the way. Suddenly, The Maxx leans over at the timekeeper’s bell, grabbing the hammer and ringing it repeatedly.*

DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!

*Before Finkel can say anything at all, The Maxx quickly grabs his microphone.*

The Maxx: *deep breath* LADIES-AND-GENTLEMEN, THE-SECOND-ROUND-HAS-ENDED!

Jeannie: That’s another one down!

Tom: Another what? Another rule? Another iota of sportsmanship?

*The Maxx flails his free arm, gesturing for Guillermo Miramontes to back off as he pulls a piece of paper out of his pants, reading from it. Melendez is still on his stomach, and Bon Jovi is hunched over on his knees.*

The Maxx: The THIRD round of an Acropolis of Bewilderment Rules match retains the rules from Round Two, and is contested with TWO special guest enforcers, who, in their limited knowledge—compared to those of my associate and myself—will protect the sanctity of this match from any interference!

*The crowd actually cheers this stipulation, happy with the ramifications of it.*

Jeannie: Did you hear that? Special guest enforcers! What a charitable move of those two to make this round as fair as they can…

Tom: I have a bad feeling about this.

*Abruptly, the lights of the arena go out and spotlights focus on the ring, as this begins playing. A pair of thick cables descends from the rafters, reaching down to the ring, as the crowd simmers in a murmur of confusion.*

Tom: …what the hell is this?

*Two pale blonde men with short hair, black trunks, boots, kneepads and elbow-pads, and red-and-white jogging jackets, harnessed to the cables, slide downward, landing in the ring before taking their harnesses off. At this, the lights return to normal.*

The Maxx: Introducing our special guest enforcers…Mike and Mark…The ZEPHYR Brothers!

*The Zephyrs don’t bother to strike any poses or add anything to their entrance, rather choosing to exit the ring as their music fades out, all four competitors in the match looking straight at them. The Maxx, still clutching the timekeeper’s hammer, begins ringing the bell furiously.*

DING DING DING DING DING DING!

*Upon this, both Zephyr Brothers descend upon Guillermo Miramontes, clubbing him over the back with a cavalcade of downward forearms. The Maxx stumbles out of his chair, still a little bit dazed, and goes over to the once-again-brawling James Bon Jovi and Casimiro Melendez, kicking Melendez in the pit of the knee from behind as he sends him stumbling. Bon Jovi and The Maxx grab Melendez from opposite sides, pushing him into the nearest ring post chest-first, before each man grabs an arm of Melendez and slams it—arm slams alternating rhythmically—against the ring post. The Zephyrs, after forearming and stomping Guillermo Miramontes, pick him up to his feet and roll him into the ring, before sliding in and continuing to stomp away at him.*

Tom: This is obscene…our “Special Guest Enforcers,” just moments after being announced, have turned to attacking the Latin Lovers!

Jeannie: JUST KEEP THOSE BOOTS AWAY FROM THEIR FACES!

*With both of Casimiro’s arms repeatedly slammed against the ring post, James Bon Jovi and The Maxx pull him away from the corner, before rolling him into the ring and walking towards the commentary tables and pulling out same seats of their own, setting themselves up with headphones.*

Bon Jovi: Behold the Acropolis of Bewilderment Rules match, in all its glory!

Tom: Wait…I don’t understand…what’s happening here?

The Maxx: We made the Zephyr Brothers our enforcers, of course! Look at the job they’re doing to keep this match safe and sacred! I forget which one of them is which…

*In the ring, the Zephyr Brothers continue to stomp away at both of the Latin Lovers. Mike Zephyr picks Casimiro up by the right arm, wrenching away at it before elbowing at his shoulder and arm whipping him down to the mat. Mark Zephyr forearms away at Guillermo Miramontes, whipping him into the opposite corner and running at him. He throws a clothesline but Miramontes gets a boot up right into his face, sending him backward quite a few steps as he clutches at his face. Guillermo charges out of the corner, running up to Mark Zephyr from behind and hitting him with a lungblower, sending the Zephyr to the mat as he rolls out of the ring in a retreat. No sooner does Guillermo turn around that a dropkick from Mike Zephyr sends him falling to the mat. Mike runs out of the ring, helping his brother to his feet as they both reach under the ring and pull out a weapon—a wooden table. Both Zephyrs lift the table up and slide it into the ring, before sliding in the ring themselves and setting it up parallel to a ring corner.*

Bon Jovi: Ah, tables…the Zephyrs sure know how to keep the tradition strong…

The Maxx: Right you are, James; right you are!

Jeannie: Yeah, I see where this is going…just don’t put their faces through that thing, please!

*Both Zephyrs quickly run over to Casimiro Melendez and pick him up, each by an arm as they forearm each shoulder that they are closer to, lifting him up and slamming him hard, down to the mat with a double vertical suplex. Both Zephyrs then turn their attention to a now-recovered Guillermo Miramontes, charging at him with a double clothesline. He manages to duck under them, and as they turn around lariats both of them simultaneously, taking them down to the mat hard. Guillermo drops to a knee, clearly exhausted, and looks over to his dazed partner. Guillermo hauls himself up to his feet and grabs Mark Zephyr by the head, dragging him over to the corner with the parallel table. He lays Mark across the table, before elbowing him repeatedly in the head. Guillermo slowly scaling up the turnbuckles, turning to face away from the table and out the stage. Guillermo prepares to jump off, when a charging Mike Zephyr jumps up behind him on the turnbuckle, forearming away at his lower back. Guillermo responds with a few back elbows to the head, Mike flailing to keep his balance with one arm as he continues to throw more forearms to the lower back of Miramontes. Suddenly, Mike Zephyr drops down to the bottom of the corner, pushing Guillermo’s legs out from under him with both hands. Guillermo goes flying backwards, clear over Mike Zephyr before crashing straight down onto the prone Mark, bits of wood flying everywhere as the table shatters to pieces.*

Bon Jovi: No way!

Tom: Looks like Mike Zephyr’s attempt to interrupt what would’ve been an aerial move caused just that to happen!

The Maxx: The Latin Losers have been lucky here so far, but they’re obviously fatigued beyond belief whereas I—and my equally excellent partner—are recovering quite well.

*Mike Zephyr’s jaw drops as he turns around in disbelief, seeing Guillermo Miramontes lying on top of a now-unconscious Mark Zephyr in the wreckage of the table. Mike can hardly register his shock completely when a running boot kick to the stomach from Casimiro Melendez sends him doubling over. Melendez lifts Mike Zephyr high up, wincing from this use of his arms, and sets Zephyr up Argentine backbreaker-style before flipping over and sending the Zephyr crashing into the mat. Casimiro releases him, getting into a seated position as his chest heaves repeatedly.*

Tom: And an Ode to Catalina from Casimiro Melendez to Mike Zephyr!

Jeannie: AND their faces are A-okay!

The Maxx: Something tells me that our special guest enforcers are going to be…busy…for a while. Pleasure talking to you, but we have some business to attend to…

*Bon Jovi & The Maxx abruptly remove their headsets before dashing back into the ring. As he's still laid out, The Maxx & Bon Jovi begin to put the boots to Casimiro. Bon Jovi has an idea he urges The Maxx to go outside to the ring apron while he himself hefts Casimiro onto his shoulders. Bon Jovi manages to get one half of The Latin Lovers up into an Electric Chair position as The Maxx readies himself to deliver "E.T.D.", but as Bon Jovi tries to get in position for The Maxx, Casimiro begins to punch at Bon Jovi's head, the blows result in Bon Jovi overbalancing, Casimiro uses Bon Jovi's forward momentum against him & tries to secure him in a Victory Roll...*

1...





2...




THE MAXX BREAKS IT UP!

*The Maxx stands & "wipes the sweat" from his brow. He looks down on both The Zephyr Brothers, then over at Bon Jovi. The pair shrug & try to subtly kick the Zephyrs out of the ring. Bothe The Maxx & Bon Jovi each pick up one of the very-fatigued Latin Lovers & attempt to whip them towards eachother so they collide mid-ring. However, Casimiro & Guillermo manage to reverse the attempted whip & send The Maxx & Bon Jovi crashing into one another instead. The cocky duo are so dazed that The Lovers manage to catch the two of them respectively & trap them with quick roll-up pins. The ref slides into position counting with both hands as The Maxx & Bon Jovi struggle to escape from this predicament...*

1...





2...





3!!!

DING-DING-DING!

*The Maxx & Bon Jovi manage to escape the roll-ups seconds after the bell has been rung. The crowd are going crazy.*

Finkel: Here are your winners...

*The Maxx is wagging his finger. He slides out of the ring, taking The Fink's microphone from him.*

The Maxx: Evidently, NOBODY read the rulebook on an Acropolis of Bewilderment match! If you had then you would know that we are now in ROUND FOUR, which, in addition to the rules from previous rounds, is clearly defined as only being able to be won, not with a pinfall, but with a submission!

*The Latin Lovers are aghast. They can't believe what's going on.*

Tom: What? When the hell do these 'rounds' even start? Just as soon as The Maxx & Bon Jovi can think of some other nonsensical stipulation to add?

Jeannie: Hey, they're just trying to ensure that the match proceeds fairly. I'm sure The Latin Lovers wouldn't want to walk away from a bogus victory. Besides which, now they're out here for even longer, something we can all enjoy.

*The Latin Lovers have clearly lost patience with The Maxx & Bon Jovi's chicanery. Before The Maxx can return to the ring, they start pummeling James Bon Jovi, Casimiro taking it a little lighter on his still damaged right hand. The Maxx tries to make a return to the ring as soon as he can. He's cut-off by Casimiro who stomps on The Maxx before he can manage to slide all the way into the ring. The Latin Lovers may be slightly more fatigued than Bon Jovi & The Maxx at this point, but they are being driven by pure anger.*

*In order to try & comply with the "rules" a bit, Casimiro & Guillermo try to trap, Bon Jovi & The Maxx in some submission holds. Casimiro ties The Maxx into a Sharpshooter & Bon Jovi finds himself at the mercy of Guillermo's Bow & Arrow hold.*

Jeannie: Well, at least now the Latin Lovers seem to be understanding the rules of an Acropolis of Bewilderment match! It took them for rounds to do so but...

Tom: Can we just give that a rest?

*Despite being held in such a deadly hold, The Maxx is still requesting a microphone from Finkel. The Fink, slightly confused, complies.*

The Maxx: Aaaaaagh! The... The fourth round is over. No submissions in the fifth round!

*The Latin Lovers release their holds wondering what the hell they have to do to win here!*

Tom: That last round seemed awfully short, don't you think?

Jeannie: These are the rules for an Acropolis of Bewilderment Match, Tom. If the fourth round is shorter than the other rounds, so be it.

*Casimiro drags The Maxx further back into the ring before he can concoct some other cockamamie stipulation. Casimiro hefts The Maxx up for a Powerbomb while Guillermo heads to the top. Together, the Latin Lovers hit The Maxx with "The Ways of Love"!*

Tom: The Latin Lovers execute "The Ways of Love" on The Maxx, this match must be over!

*But James Bon Jovi is being helped over to the time-keeper's table by the Zephyr Brothers. He starts ringing the bell immediately as he gets there.*

Tom: Oh, what now?

*The Latin Lovers cease what they were about to do as the look out to see what's going on.*

Bon Jovi: Gee whiz, sorry to rain on your parade guys, but if you had read up on the rules at all, you would know that in the fifth & final round of an Acropolis of Bewilderment Match there is a strict rule about no double-team moves on an opponent. Breaking this most sacred of stipulations resulst in INSTANT DISQUALIFICATION! Therefore, this most titanic of contests must go to the deliriously delightful duo of JAMES BON JOVI AND THE MAXX!

*"Bad Medicine" begins to play over the W*I*G-Sphere's sound-system as the crowd boo loudly.*

Tom: That's it? That's how they win?

Jeannie: If The Latin Lovers had kept up on the rules...

Tom: Bon Jovi & The Maxx were pulling "rules" out of their asses the whole match & you know it! This match was a shameful display.

*The Maxx rolls out of the ring as The Latin Lovers can do nothing but look on in absolute astonishment, their mouths agape. The Maxx joins Bon Jovi & The Zephyr Brothers on the ramp as all our raise their arms in the air. The fans boo & throw trash at the quartet assembled on the ramp, unable to believe that a match could have gone to such a crappy finish.*

Tom: That was just... after such a match, such an effort by The Latin Lovers, to see a contest end in this fashion is disgusting. I want to apologise to all our fans tonight. Guys, let's just get away from this. Go to anything else, please!

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

Finkel: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and is for the BLAZING PATH CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger…

*James “Magnum” Constance’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=CR9WJToFsTs

Finkel: Coming down the aisle, at 6 feet 2 inches, weighting in at 245 pounds, from Honolulu Hawaii, by way of Detroit, Michigan—JAMES “MAGNUM” CONSTANCE.

*James “Magnum” Constance comes out to a big pop, looking a little fatigued from the battle royal earlier. He is wearing sunglasses, a Detroit Tigers cap, a Hawaiian shirt, orange tropical floral design trunks, black knee pads, and black boots. He walks to the ring as some pyro goes off and enters it. Then, he takes off his cap, shirt, and sunglasses and hands them to the referee, who hands them to the timekeeper.*

Tom Bailey: And, it’s time for the first ever Blazing Path Championship defense here in W*I*G. And, here comes the challenger.

Jeannie Lawless: Boy, does Magnum have an uphill battle on hand!

Tom: You got that right. James “Magnum” Constance had to win a battle royal earlier to just give this shot. And, it shows.

Jeannie: Even though it looks like Vin Beverly is going to have an easy time defending hit title, I wouldn’t be surprised if Magnum does give him a fight.

Finkel: And his opponent, the champion…

*“Me + Yr Daughter” starts up over the speakers of the Colvitron as Vin Beverly struts out onto the stage to a rather mixed reaction, the Blazing Path Championship draped over his left shoulder and a confident smirk on his face.*

Finkel: From Panama City, Florida, at 6 feet 3 inches, weighing in tonight at 265 pounds…he is the BLAZING PATH CHAMPION…Vin…BEVERLYYYYY!

*Vin makes his way down to the ring, walking with a pace very much in line with the music. He turns his head towards one side of the aisle, exchanging a few glances with the ladies as he moves down the ramp but keeps his distance from the much less friendly, outreaching men alongside them. As he gets to the ring, he turns a corner to run up the steps, and reaching the top, walks along the apron, wiping his feet on the outside before entering. Vin scales the nearest turnbuckle, pulling the belt off his shoulders and hoisting it high into the air as he glances out to the crowd, turning a shoulder to glance down at Magnum across the other side of the ring.*

Jeannie: Mmmm! Look who’s here now!

Tom: Yes, look who finally came out of his cave on Mars! Beverly seems in a good mood, too, especially with all the rest that he’s had, not to mention how fatigued his opponent almost certainly is right now…

*Beverly drops from the top turnbuckle, turning around and again lifting the belt high over his head. He hands it over to the ref, who in turn hands it to the timekeeper’s table, as his music fades out. Afterwards, the referee calls for the bell to get the match underway.*

DING DING DING!

*Both Vin Beverly and James Constance begin circling the ring, moving closer to each other. The two lock up, collar-and-elbow, Beverly gradually overpowering the still-fatigued James Constance as he forces him back into a corner. Beverly, grabbing onto the top ropes, leans back and pushes himself forward, leaning down and hitting Constance in the abdomen with a big shoulder. Again, he rears back and shoots himself forward, hitting Constance with another big shoulder, causing James to double over as Vin pulls himself back out of the corner. Vin Beverly grabs Constance in a suplex position, lifting him straight off the mat and slamming him back-first behind them. He rolls over and hooks a leg, ordering the referee to make the count.*

Tom: Already in the match and Vin Beverly looks to take control with a big suplex!

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

*Vin gets up, picking James up by the head as he sits him up, slipping behind him as he locks in a chinlock with one arm, forearming Magnum in the upper back with the other. But without a secure grip with both arms around Magnum, the winner of the earlier battle royal uses both of his arms on one of Vin’s to push him away, gripping the arm and spinning it around in a hammerlock as he simultaneously gets to his feet. Vin throws a stiff elbow, catching Magnum in the side of the head as he counters the hammerlock, applying one of his own. Vin knees Magnum in the lower back once, before spinning him around and locking his arms around those of Constance. He picks him off the mat, lifting him high and tossing him backwards to execute a butterfly suplex. Vin drops down for the cover again, grinding a forearm into Magnum’s face as he once again loudly yells for a pin.*

Jeannie: Butterfly this time.

Tom: And no less painful, in fact the impact from this one seems even more powerful than the previous suplex!

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

*With Magnum once again kicking out, Vin picks him up off the mat and pushes him into a corner, hammering away at his sweat-bedewed head with short, rapid forearms. With Magnum leaning over in the corner, seated on the lowest turnbuckle, Vin runs back to the opposite side of the ring, making a tight turn and racing towards Magnum. Vin throws a foot up, making a roaring Yakuza kick. Magnum ducks to the side, Vin throwing his foot right over the top turnbuckle. As he frantically attempts to pull his foot out and regain balance, Magnum creeps up behind him and grabs him around the waist, hoisting him up and throwing him head-first into the mat with a German suplex! Vin clutches at his head and neck as Magnum slides down towards him and hooks a leg.*

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

Tom: Not quite a pin, but it’s almost certainly necessary for Magnum to have executed such a big move.

Jeannie: Yeah, if he doesn’t step up with big moves like that, then he’s going to be overwhelmed by Vin…hmmm…wouldn’t mind if he overwhelmed me…

*Magnum hauls himself up to his feet, pulling Vin Beverly up with him and locking in a front face lock. Beverly suddenly begins punching him with both fists in the sides, gradually loosening the hold up as he charges forward, slamming Magnum back-first into a corner. Magnum releases Beverly with a gasp, as Vin shakes his head a bit, throwing an elbow into Magnum’s face before sitting him up on the middle turnbuckle. Beverly climbs up a bit, throwing a few more forearms into the jaw of James Constance. He then seats him up onto the top turnbuckle, once again unleashing some forearms as he pulls himself up to the top turnbuckle and hoists James up onto his shoulders, laterally.*

Tom: It looks like he’s going for his finisher of choice—an F-5—THIS early in the match!

Jeannie: Going in for the kill against the obviously fatigued-beyond-will James Constance, I bet.

*Vin Beverly turns Constance facing the inside of the ring, pushing him off of his shoulders as he throws him down—but Magnum, quickly grabbing onto Vin’s head, blocks the move entirely, and then pulls Beverly right off the turnbuckle with a swinging neckbreaker as both men go crashing into the mat below them. Magnum, laying on his back, breathes in and out heavily as Vin Beverly once again clutches at his neck, rolling onto his stomach as he vainly attempts to push himself up to his feet.*

Tom: Tropical Madness from James Constance—what a reversal, and that move, in conjunction with that downright brutal German suplex not long ago—may have seriously taken away Vin Beverly’s advantage coming into this match!

*Looking at both prone men, the referee has little choice but to begin a 10-count.*

1!

2!

3!

4!

*Magnum and Vin are both on their hands and knees.*

5!

6!

*Each man has just about made it to a standing position, Magnum pulling himself up with the aid of the ropes as Vin pushes himself off the mat with one arm, the other still slung across the back of his neck.*

7!

8!

*Finally, both of them are up. Vin Beverly charges towards James Constance, throwing a clothesline, but Magnum catches him with one of his own, sending him down to the mat. Vin Beverly jumps back up to his feet, eating another clothesline from Constance who, despite holding an advantage for now, is looking extremely tired at this point. He throws another clothesline at a once-again standing Vin Beverly, but Vin, using his strength advantage, blocks the clothesline with both of his arms and throws another elbow at James Constance’s head, sending him staggering back. Vin grabs James Constance around the shoulders, lifting him up and giving him an old-fashioned backbreaker straight across a knee as he sends him down to the mat. Vin runs back into the ropes, bouncing off as he hits a knee drop right onto Magnum’s head before dropping down and making another pin attempt, this time less vocal than the last.*

Tom: Two dangerous moves by Vin Beverly, who, after earlier, is looking to take back the control that he was staking out earlier! Will that do it?!

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

*At this, Vin pushes himself up off the mat, walking around as he once again nurses his neck, waiting for a dazed James Constance to pull himself up to his feet. Vin throws away the opportunity to attack him in this situation, standing to face him just as Magnum gets to his feet. Vin now decides to lean in, going to lift Magnum up, but James grabs an arm, rolling back and, much like earlier in the evening, he rolls Vin Beverly up with a small package!*

Jeannie: SMALL PACKAGE!

Tom: SMALL PACKAGE! JUST LIKE HOW HE WON THE BATTLE ROYAL!

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

Tom: Not quite, but close!

*Vin pushes himself out, each man getting to his feet as they trade shots back and forth with one another. Suddenly, Vin knees Magnum in the stomach. Magnum doubles over, and Vin grabs him. He picks him up for a suplex. However, Magnum slips out and lands on his feet behind Vin. Magnum grabs Vin’s torso, going for a German suplex. However, Vin dead weights Magnum and begins elbowing him in the head. Magnum suddenly pushes Vin to the ropes. He tries to roll Vin over for a pin, but Vin grabs the ropes. Magnum rolls over onto the mat and rolls over onto his feet. Vin turns around, charges at Magnum, and hits him with a crossbody. Vin rolls over Magnum, and both men get up. Magnum turns around and charges at Vin, but Vin catches him with a hip toss. Magnum lands on the mat, and Vin swings his leg around, hitting Magnum in the side of the head with his knee. Magnum rolls over and gets up onto his knees, holding his head. Suddenly, Vin charges at Magnum and hits him with a knee strike to his face, squashing him into the second turnbuckle of the corner.*

Tom: Owwie Wowie! What a knee strike from Vin Beverly!? Magnum could be concussed!

Jeannie: “Owwie Wowie”? My God.

Tom: What!?

*The ref walks over to check on Magnum. However, before he can, Vin puts his foot onto Magnum’s throat and starts chocking him. Magnum thrashes about, trying to get out of it. The ref starts a 5 count.*

1…

2…

3…

4…

*Vin removes his foot from Magnum’s throat. Magnum starts coughing. The ref checks on him. Suddenly, Vin grabs the ref, pushes him out of the way, puts his foot back on Magnum’s throat, and chokes him out again. The ref starts yelling at Vin. He then begins another count.*

1…

2…

3…

4…

*Vin removes his foot from Magnum’s throat. The ref gets into Vin’s face. Suddenly, Vin pushes the ref to the mat. The ref gets up and pushes Vin back. The crowd cheers loudly. Vin looks pissed. He grabs the ref and threatens to punch him.*

Tom: What is the meaning of this!?

Jeannie: I tell you what the meaning is—the ref is getting out of line, and Vin is just putting him back into his place.

Tom: It looks more like he’s trying to get himself disqualified.

Jeannie: Well, if you weren’t gonna accept my answer, then why did you ask!?

*Vin still has a hold of the ref. The ref warns him to not punch him. Just when it looks like Vin isn’t gonna listen, Magnum suddenly jumps up and hits Vin from behind with a clothesline, taking them both down. The ref somehow manages to stay on his feet. Though, his shirts a little ripped. Both men get up. Vin goes for a punch, but Magnum blocks it. He then starts punching Vin himself. Suddenly, a flurry of punches and chops hit Vin like a hailstorm. The crowd cheers loudly as Vin reels back. Then, Magnum back off, runs to the ropes, bounces off of them, and charges at Vin. However, Vin catches him with a tilt-a-whirl gutbuster. Magnum falls to the mat holding his stomach, the air having gone out of him, his comeback, and the audience.*

Tom: Damn! Just when it looked like James “Magnum” Constance was about to get back into this match, Vin Beverly takes the wind out of his sails with a tilt-a-whirl gutbuster.

Jeannie: You gotta remember, Magnum wrestled another match tonight. Vin hasn’t. He’s fresher and can take a lot more punishment.

*Vin stays on his knees, getting a breather and waiting for Magnum to get up. Magnum eventually does, holding his stomach. He turns around and is met with Vin charging at him; Vin squashes him into the corner with a lariat/splash. Vin then pulls Magnum from the corner, picks him up, and powerbombs him onto the top turnbuckle. Magnum bounces off the turnbuckle, and Vin grabs him and hits him with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Magnum hits the mat and jumps up in a sitting position. Vin quickly gets up, grabs Magnum’s arms, and locks into a straight jacket clutch.*

Tom: It doesn’t look good for Magnum! Vin Beverly now has him locked into the Beverly Clutch!

Jeannie: Tis a shame. He would have looked good in that Blazing Path Title belt. At least I can ogle Vin Beverly whenever he wears it.

*Magnum thrashes about trying to get out of the hold, but Vin has it locked on tight. The ref asks Magnum if he wants to give up, but he shakes his head no. After a few minutes, it appears that Magnum is fading. However, he is still able to shake his head no whenever the ref asks him if he wants to give up. Suddenly, a few fans begin chanting “Magnum.” The chant picks up speed as a few more people start chanting. Then, it gets louder. And louder. And louder. Soon, the whole audience is chanting “Magnum! Magnum! Magnum!” Suddenly, Magnum’s leg starts shaking. He gets his foot onto the mat and pushes up. Vin tries to push him back to the mat, but Magnum manages to get his other foot and pushes up. Soon, Magnum is standing up. Vin still has the Beverly Clutch locked on. Suddenly, Magnum hits Vin with a hip attack. Vin doubles over but doesn’t release the hold. So, Magnum hits him with another hip attack. Vin still doesn’t release the hold. So, Magnum hits him again. This time, Vin lets go. The crowd goes wild.*

Tom: I don’t believe it! Magnum has gotten out of the Beverly Clutch!

Jeannie: Me neither! Why would anyone want to get out of the embrace of Vin’s sexy arms!?

Tom: Well, for one, he was basically choking Magnum!

Jeannie: Yeah…but still!

*Magnum quickly runs to the ropes and bounces off of them. However, Vin charges at Magnum with a clothesline. Luckily, Magnum ducks. Vin turns around and charges at Magnum again as he runs to the other ropes bounces off of them. Vin tries for the clothesline again, but Magnum surprises him with a high knee strike. The crowd cheers as both men hit the mat. Vin looks stunned. But, he quickly gets up and charges at Magnum for a clothesline. Magnum gets up as well and ducks Vin’s arm. Both men hit the ropes, bounce off of them, and charge at each other. Then, Magnum jumps up and hits Vin with a lariat takedown. Magnum quickly gets up and waits for Vin to get up. He does, and Magnum charges at Vin, taking him down with a clothesline. Magnum turns around and waits for Vin to get up again. He does, and Magnum takes him down with another clothesline. Magnum waits for Vin to get up again. He does, and Magnum charges at Vin for another clothesline. This time, Vin ducks. Magnum hits the ropes, bounces off of them, and charges at Vin for another try. However, Vin ducks, hoping for a back body drop. Unfortunately, Vin telegraphed it. Magnum quickly counters with a facebuster knee smash. Vin jumps up and staggers back onto the ropes. Magnum backs into the opposite ropes, bounces off of them, charges at Vin, and clotheslines him to the outside. The crowd cheers loudly as Magnum pumps his fist.*

Tom: Sweet Sammy From Miami! Magnum is on a roll!

Jeannie: I’d love it if Magnum would roll on me.

Tom: Wh-what!? What does that mean!?

Jeannie: I don’t know. Something sexual? Get off my back, dammit!

*Magnum climbs up to the top turnbuckle, waiting for Vin to get up. He does, and Magnum jumps off, hitting Vin with a double axe handle. The crowd cheers loudly as Vin hits the floor. Magnum quickly picks him up and throws him back into the ring. Magnum then climbs up onto the apron and then up to the top turnbuckle. He waits for Vin to get up before he jumps off. However, this is a mistake as Vin gets up and quickly runs to the ropes, shaking them and crotching Magnum onto the top turnbuckle. Vin quickly punches Magnum a few times. Then, he climbs up to the top turnbuckle. He hits Magnum in the back with a few forearm strikes. Then, he grabs Magnum’s arm and pulls him up, trying to go for a superplex. However, Magnum suddenly punches him in the stomach. Magnum quickly does it again and again and again and again and again. Eventually, Magnum gets out of the suplex hold. Vin nearly falls off the turnbuckle, but Magnum grabs him. He then puts Vin’s head between his legs. The crowd perks up, knowing what’s coming next. Sure enough, Magnum drops Vin to the mat with a Pepsi plunge. The crowd cheers as Magnum rolls Vin over for a pin.*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: I don’t believe it! Texas Lightning wasn’t enough to keep Vin Beverly down!

Jeannie: He really wants to hold onto that Blazing Path Title!

*Magnum gets up and picks up Vin. He tries to body slam Vin, but Vin slips out of it, landing on his feet behind Magnum. He jumps onto Magnum’s back for a sleeper, but Magnum runs back and squashes Vin in the turnbuckle. Magnum then moves from the corner. He grabs Vin and tries to whip him into the opposite corner. However, Vin reverses and sends Magnum to the corner himself. Vin quickly charges at Magnum and hits him with a knee strike to the head. Vin then grabs Magnum’s head, pulls him out of the corner, and tries to hit him with a bulldog. However, Magnum slips out of Vin’s grips and pushes him into the other corner, squashing Vin between himself and turnbuckles. Magnum backs away from the corner, letting Vin to stagger out of it. He then grabs Vin, picks him up, and drops him to the mat with a belly to back suplex. Magnum quickly gets up and waits for Vin to get up. He does, and Magnum kicks him in the stomach. Vin bends over, and Magnum grabs him and hits him with a double underhook piledriver. Magnum quickly covers him for a pin.*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Again! Vin Beverly kicks out, this time from the Big Blow!

Jeannie: Magnum’s gonna have to pull out all the stops to win this one.

*Magnum looks frustrated. He slaps the mat and gets up, waiting for Vin to get up. He rolls over to the ropes, grabs them, and slowly pulls himself up. Then, Vin turns around, and Magnum strikes, going for a Wave Goodbye (jumping superkick). However, Vin ducks and rolls over a few feet away from Magnum. Magnum turns around. And, both men charge at each other. However, Vin wins out with a front dropkick to Magnum’s chest, sending him flying back into a corner. Vin quickly rolls over onto his feet as Magnum bounces out of the corner, holding the back of his head. Vin grabs Magnum, runs back, and drops him onto the top turnbuckle of the opposite corner with a flapjack. Magnum bounces up and falls back onto the mat.*

Tom: Ah damn! Just as Magnum was mounting a comeback, Vin Beverly has taken it from him.

Jeannie: It appears that Magnum has snatched defeat from the claw of victory.

Tom: Really? You’re going with that sports cliché.

Jeannie: Hey! Don’t lecture me, Mr. Owwie Wowie!

*Vin gets up and takes a breather in the corner. Meanwhile, Magnum rolls over on the mat on his hands and knees, holding his jaw. Soon, he gets up, shaking his head. Both men turn around and face each other. However, Vin is able to strike first, hitting Magnum with a yakuza kick. Magnum staggers back into the ropes and bounces off of them. Vin quickly gets up and catches Magnum onto his shoulders. Then, Vin hits Magnum with a vicious F-5 that sends Magnum practically across the ring. He lands near the ropes. Vin then quickly runs over and covers him.*

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*Magnum gets his foot onto the bottom rope, but ref doesn’t see.*



3! *The bell ring and crowd boos. Vin quickly jumps up, celebrating as his music starts playing. However, the ref sees Magnum’s foot on the bottom rope and waves off the victory.*

Tom: F-5! And, this one is over!

Jeannie: Wait! Magnum’s foot is on the rope!

Tom: You’re right! And, the ref is waving it off.

*Vin’s music stops as the referee walks over to confab with Finkel. Soon, Fink relays the message.*

Finkel: The referee has informed me that Magnum’s foot was on the bottom rope. Therefore, this match will continue!

*The crowd cheers loudly. Vin, on the other hand, looks very upset.*

Tom: Yes! The ref has done the right thing and continued the match.

Jeannie: Regardless of whether it’s right or not, Vin Beverly looks pretty upset about the decision...

*Sure enough, Vin gets up into the ref’s face. He yells at him for restarting the match. But, the ref just tells him what he told Finkel: that Magnum’s foot was on the rope and the pin doesn’t count. Vin just keeps yelling at him. The referee yells back, a finger pointed in Beverly's face as he once again explains the situation. Beverly, his hands on his hips as his head shakes back and forth, continues to argue back.*

Tom: What I think Vin doesn't understand is that what just happened is completely within the grounds of the rules.

Jeannie: That's not stopping him from arguing though, and that too is within the rules!

*As all this has transpired, Magnum has been regaining his bearings. He gets up, shakes his head, and takes a little breather. Then, he sees Vin arguing with the referee. Magnum sneaks up behind Vin, grabs him, and hits him with a high angle bridging belly to back suplex. The ref drops down to count the pin.*

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3! *The bell rings, the crowd cheers, and Magnum’s music starts playing.*

Finkel: Here is your winner, and NEW Blazing Path Champion...JAMES "MAGNUM" CONSTANCE!

Tom: He did it! He did it! Magnum won! Magnum has won the Blazing Path Championship with the Island Hoppers!

*The referee, already collecting the title from the timekeeper's table, hands the belt over to a dazed and completely exhausted James Constance, who can barely get up to his feet. The referee helps him with one hand, holding the belt in the other as he hands it off. Magnum takes no time to celebrate in the ring, rolling to the outside and staggering up the ramp, holding his new championship high over his head. Inside the ring, a stunned Vin Beverly gets to his knees, his hands over the back of his neck, looking utterly distraught.*

Tom: It may not be a good night for Vin Beverly, but for James Constance, this hard-fought series of battles has truly paid off, and the Blazing Path Championship is now his.

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

Finkel: The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall. Introducing first…

*Talia Bell’s music plays.* www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rRCw3pxX1M

Finkel: Introducing first, coming down the aisle, at 5 feet 7 inches, weighing 140 pounds, from Santa Fe, New Mexico, by way of Gisbourne, New Zealand—TALIA BELL.

*Talia comes out by herself to the boos of the crowd. She has on a purple corset-styled singlet with a skirt with “TNT” in white on the back and front and purple boots with “TNT” in white down them. She soon reaches the ring and enters it.*

Tom Bailey: Well, it’s time for should be a hard-hitting encounter between Ykaterina Milosanova and Talia Bell.

Jeannie Lawless: Dammit! Talia couldn’t come out with TNT.

Tom: He has a match on the card tonight! Can’t you wait?

Jeannie: NO!

Finkel: And introducing her opponent…

*“Moskau” begins to play over the speakers as the crowd cheers warmly for Ykaterina Milosanova, who steps out onto the stage, hands on her hips as she pans her head around, looking at the large audience around her.*

Finkel: From Yaroslavl, Russia, weighing in at 142 pounds…YYYYKATERINA MILOSANOOOOVAAAAA!

*Ykaterina makes her way down the ramp and through the aisle, slapping hands with all of the nearby audience members whose arms reach out to her. Upon reaching the ring, Milosanova hops onto the apron, facing the Colvitron and the stage as she glances over her shoulders, keeping a watchful eye on her opponent from the other side of the ring.*

Tom: And here comes the Masked Russian!

Jeannie: Shouldn’t that be the Masked Moscowian?

Tom: No, because Ykaterina isn’t from Moscow.

Jeannie: What does that matter? It’s all the same over there in Mother Russia: cold and bleak.

Tom: To all our Russian fans out there, please direct your hate mail to Jeannie Lawless via her e-mail address, [e-mail].

*Ykaterina pushes herself up off of the apron, jumping and bouncing off of the ropes as she backflips into the ring, sticking a landing on her feet a she quickly turns around to face Talia, both women’s eyes focused on one another with opposing stares as Ykaterina’s music begins to fade out.*

DING DING DING!

*At the sound of the bell, both women walk towards each other, locking up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up as the two push back and forth. Talia, getting what becomes a solid edge, slowly recoils herself back and pushes forward, releasing and sending Ykaterina backwards across the ring. Ykaterina keeps her footing and rebounds off the ropes, bouncing back towards Talia just as the New Zealander throws a clothesline at her. Milosanova slides right in between Talia’s legs, winding up right behind her as Bell stumbles forward, the clothesline still following through. Ykaterina shoots up to her feet, backing herself away as Talia quickly turns back around, looking slightly frustrated at the inconclusive exchange. Talia advances back towards Ykaterina, throwing her arms up and lunging at the Russian, attempting to lock back up with her. Ykaterina dodges to the side and grabs Talia by the nearest arm, arm dragging her down to the mat and locking in a side armbar.*

Tom: Ykaterina’s speed and agility pay off as she has Talia locked into an armbar.

Jeannie: You may think that little “revealing my e-mail address” is funny, but the jokes on you! I don’t read Russian! So, I’m not going to know what they’re saying to me!

Tom: There are Russians that speak English. Plus, the sheer amount of e-mails you get could crash your address. Plus, when I said you e-mail, everyone heard it not just Russians.

Jeannie: I hate you.

*Ykaterina continues to wrench away at Talia’s arm, as Talia, using her other arm and her legs, gets herself up to her hands and knees. Milosanova pulls back on Talia’s arm, picking her up from behind and converting the armbar into a standing hammerlock. Talia reverses the hold after a few seconds, putting Ykaterina in a hammerlock of her own as she pulls upward on the arm. Ykaterina looks to both her sides, Talia continuing to pull up on her arm, and spins around, winding up behind Talia Bell again. Instead of snapping the hammerlock back on, Ykaterina applies a side headlock on Talia, slowly lowering her center of gravity as she works to keep the hold locked in. Talia wraps both of her arms around Ykaterina’s waist, lifting the Russian up and back for a back suplex. But Ykaterina frees herself, backflipping out and behind Talia as he runs up behind her, quickly taking her down to the mat and going for a schoolgirl pin.*

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KICKOUT!

Jeannie: Talia kicks from a quick pin from Ykaterina.

Tom: I can’t believe you just revealed my e-mail address on the air!

Jeannie: You brought it on yourself.

Tom: You may as well just reveal my phone number.

Jeannie: Okay! 555-…

Tom: DON’T YOU DARE!!!!

Jeannie: I was just joking.

*As soon as Talia goes to get back up to her feet, Ykaterina backs herself up again, lengthening the distance between herself and Talia Bell. The two start circling the ring, facing one another and both lunge in forward as Ykaterina drops down to her knees, spinning back around Talia’s legs and executing a double-leg takedown. Milosanova transitions over to Talia’s head and locks in a front facelock, digging her feet into the mat as best she can to keep Talia down. But Talia refuses to stay off of her feet for long and gradually pushes herself back up, forcing Ykaterina to go up with her, the facelock still in. Talia pushes herself forward as quickly as she can; going towards a corner of the ring as Ykaterina still keeps the facelock in. Ykaterina attempts to release and push herself off to the side to get out of the corner but Talia wraps her arms around her waist, trapping her as she pushes her further into the corner. The referee quickly steps in, separating the two with his arms as Ykaterina leans back in the corner. Just as Ykaterina is again going to push herself off to the side to keep herself from being cornered, Talia leans over the ref and hits Milosanova in her masked face with a forearm, pushing her back into the corner. Before the ref can respond, Talia wedges herself in between him and Ykaterina and lines her shoulder up with Ykaterina’s abdomen, before rearing back and ramming her shoulder right into her opponent’s torso repeatedly.*

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4!

*At the last second, Talia pulls herself back and stops the count as Ykaterina grips her abdomen in pain. Talia grabs her by one arm, leaning herself back and executing a strong Irish whip towards the opposite corner. As Milosanova slams into the corner, Talia races towards her at full speed, going for a clothesline. Talia throws her arm up at Ykaterina, but is suddenly stopped cold as a boot from Ykaterina goes slamming into her face, sending her staggering back and facing away from the corner. Ykaterina quickly climbs up to the turnbuckle and jumps off, executing a flip neckbreaker from behind and taking Talia Bell down to the mat. Milosanova drops down and hooks a leg.*

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2!




KICKOUT!

Tom: Talia kicks out again, this time from a flying neckbreaker.

Jeannie: Made popular by Buff “The Stuff” Bagwell.

Tom: I don’t know if that’s true, but he did to the move.

Jeannie: And, he looked good doing it. Hell, he looked good doing everything.

Tom: Wow! I had no idea just how perverted you were until now.

Jeannie: What’s wrong with Buff Bagwell!?

Tom: Everything.

*Talia pushes the Russian away from her as she simultaneously kicks out, sending her opponent back a short distance as she climbs back up to her feet. As she gets up, Ykaterina kicks her in the stomach once, causing her to double over and locks in a front facelock, dropping to her knees as she leans downward, Talia going down to her own knees with her. Milosanova wrenches away at Talia’s head, leaning back now as both of them go down to the mat. With Talia in a prone position, Ykaterina opens her legs and locks in a body scissors on Bell, continuing to pull away at her head as she squeezes her abdomen tightly. Talia, using her arms, pulls away at Ykaterina’s, trying to break the facelock. Milosanova attempts to tighten her grip, but feels it slipping as the more powerful Talia Bell breaks the lock of her fingers and pulls her arms apart. With Ykaterina still holding the body scissors on her, Talia pulls her upper torso up off the mat and above Milosanova, looking down at her as she begins to punch away at the head of her opponent. Ykaterina responds with a few of punches of her own, before quickly attempting to lock her facelock back in. But just as she gets her arms around Talia’s head, Talia manages to get her entire body up off the mat, picking up Ykaterina with her as she gets on her knees, punching away at the stomach of her opponent. Ykaterina’s grip loosens again, before her body scissors detaches and Talia quickly picks her up by the waist, turning her around and throwing her off of her with a gutwrench suplex. As Ykaterina’s back crashes into the mat, Talia quickly goes for the pin.*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Sweet Baby James! Gutwrench suplex out of nowhere from Talia Bell! But, she can’t keep Ykaterina down for a three!

Jeannie: I’ll have you know that Buff Bagwell is not only an underrated wrestler, but he also looked pretty damn good!

Tom: Let it go!

*Talia picks Ykaterina up by the head and delivers a pair of chops to the chest, each one garnering a “WOOO!” from the audience. She grabs Ykaterina around the waist and pulls her up off the ground, raising her up and coming down hard with a sidewalk slam. Not wasting a second, Talia places Ykaterina into a seated position, grabs her arms and puts a digs a boot into her back, leaning back with a surfboard stretch as Milosanova groans in pain. She darts her eyes over to the referee, grabbing his attention, and moves them back to look to Ykaterina, signaling for the ref to check and see if Milosanova is willing to submit. Although he asks, Milosanova responds with no words, struggling to escape the hold. Talia quickly pulls her boot out of Ykaterina’s back and kicks her straight in the back, before pushing her foot into her back harder than before as she rears back again. Again, the referee checks for Ykaterina to submit, but the Russian gives no verbal response at all. Once more, Talia pulls her foot off of Ykaterina’s back and pushes it forward, only this time, Milosanova flops to the mat, flat on her back, Talia’s foot sailing over her head as she slips under Talia’s legs and out behind her, causing Talia to let go of her arms. Talia turns around, swinging one of her arms as she tries to catch the Russian on the side of the head, but Ykaterina ducks, before executing a roundhouse kick to the stomach of Talia, causing her to briefly double over. Ykaterina throws a straight kick to the head, sending Talia staggering back, before jumping up, wrapping her legs around Talia’s shoulders and taking her down to the mat with a hurricanrana, following through to hook a leg!*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Hurricanrana from Ykaterina! But, it leads to another near fall.

Jeannie: Buff Bagwell is an accomplished athlete. Besides wrestling, he played football and baseball in high school AND was a boxer!

Tom: I no longer care. Please stop.

*Ykaterina quickly gets up, wringing the pain out of her arms as she rubs at her back, backing herself up as Talia gets back up, looking a bit less collected than before. Talia runs at Ykaterina, kicking her in the stomach and lifts her up to execute a vertical suplex. But Ykaterina slips out on the way down, landing on her feet, back to back with Talia Bell. The two lock arms, each trying to overpower and flip the over in a battle to get the backslide. Ykaterina tries to lower herself, dropping to her knees, but Talia continues to pull away until she flips Ykaterina over and pins her shoulders down to the mat. Before the referee can even count the pin, Milosanova skins the cat, landing on her feet as she struggles to get to her feet, her arms still interlocked with those of Talia, who is also pulling herself up. Ykaterina frees her arms, only to take another kick to the abdomen by Talia, who, grabbing her by the arm, whips her into the ropes. As Milosanova rebounds off and comes running back, Talia throws a clothesline at her head, but Ykaterina manages to avoid it, ducking under it before jumping up mid-run and driving Talia’s head into the mat with a float-over DDT. Milosanova quickly drops down and hooks a leg.*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Another near fall! Ykaterina and Talia are going for pins early and often! They obviously don’t wanna a repeat of the double countout from Vindication.

Jeannie: Also, Buff Bagwell had several successful tag teams in WCW, with the likes of 2 Cold Scorpio, Scott Norton, Scott Steiner, Scotty Riggs, and Lex Luger. I mean, he is a 5 time WCW Tag Team Champion!

Tom: Who are you!? Buff Bagwell’s biographer!?

Jeannie: Don’t tell me you didn’t enjoy seeing American Males or Totally Buff?

Tom: I hate to break your heart, but…

*With Talia still down on the mat, Ykaterina gets up onto her feet, picking Talia up with her and kicking her in the back of the legs, taking her down to her knees as she wraps her arms around her neck and applies a neck lock. Ykaterina pulls down diagonally, leaning towards the side as Talia tries to pull her opponent’s arms apart. Milosanova turns up the pressure on the hold, wrenching at Talia’s neck and signaling to the referee to check the hold for a submission. The referee asks, but Talia’s answer is a pair of elbows to Ykaterina’s abdomen, loosening the hold. Ykaterina wrenches down at Talia’s neck again, but another pair of elbows break the hold as she reels back, allowing Talia to get herself back up to her feet. Talia Bell executes a loud chop before whipping Milosanova into the ropes. Talia lowers her head, going for a back body drop. Ykaterina manages to jump over her, grabbing Talia around the waist and executing a sunset flip. Milosanova attempts to pull Talia Bell over, who staggers, flailing her arms as she attempts to maintain a balance and not get flipped over onto her back. Ykaterina continues to pull down, but Talia leans forward, lowering her arms and forearming Ykaterina on the head repeatedly. Milosanova loses her grip around the waist of Talia Bell, who is able now to pick Ykaterina Milosanova up around the waist, lifting her up and executing a big fall-away slam. Talia shoots back up to her feet with a kip-up and suddenly flips over, dropping down onto Ykaterina with a standing moonsault and staying on top of her for the pin.*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Sweet Sauron! Talia avoids a sunset flip pin and hits Ykaterina with Blue Thunder but is unable to keep Ykaterina down with a pin of her own.

Jeannie: Buff Bagwell once faced “Rowdy” Roddy Piper in a boxing match! Who else can say that!?

Tom: Mr. T.

Jeannie: Exactly! He’s in elite company.

Tom: I apologize, people. If I had known she was going to give us the Buff Bagwell life story, then I would never have brought his name up.

*Talia gets up, looking a little frustrated as she nurses the back of her head and neck. She lifts Ykaterina up off the ground by the head and whips her straight into the corner farthest away. Talia Bell charges forward at the Russian, who dodges out of the way as Talia runs into the corner. But Talia manages to stop herself, holding onto the ropes and keeping herself inches away from going straight into the corner. Before she can turn herself around, Ykaterina Milosanova’s arms slip over her head as a sleeper hold is applied. Talia hangs onto the ropes as Ykaterina pulls back, before jumping onto the back of Bell and forming a body scissors as she deadweights to bring Bell off of the ropes. The referee immediately begins a count.*

Tom: Ykaterina’s got a sleeper hold locked in but Talia’s got her hands on the ropes! If she doesn’t let go, this could lead to a disqualification!

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*Talia maintains a hold onto the ropes and Ykaterina immediately lets go, falling flat on her back as she hits the mat. Talia shakes off the sleeper, turning back around now and facing Milosanova as she picks her up and throws a few punches, before finishing the strikes with a chop. Ykaterina dodges the last one, throwing a roundhouse kick to the head, but Talia ducks this, lifting Ykaterina straight up into the air just as the Russian spins around from the kick. Talia hoists Ykaterina over her shoulder powerslam style and begins to run forward, but Ykaterina, struggling as hard as she can, slips out behind her at the last moment and wraps her arms around Bell’s head again with the sleeper. Talia’s arms begin flailing wildly, the New Zealander struggling to get herself out of the hold, stepping towards the ropes to try to get it broken. Ykaterina rears back, keeping the hold in as she attempts to immobilize Talia, who is slowly making progress towards the ropes with each step.*

Tom: Sleeperhold back on Talia Bell and she’s struggling to get out of it!

Jeannie: Buff Bagwell was not only a member of WCW’s version of the nWo but also the New Japan nWo.

Tom: Please stop! I’m begging you!

Jeannie: He was buddies with Masahiro Chono and The Great Muta!

*Talia gets extremely close to the ropes now, but seems to be fading slightly as Ykaterina continues to pull away at her head, leaning back. Ykaterina quickly turns herself, causing Talia to turn with her as Ykaterina is pushed back into the ropes, the sleeper still held in. She jumps up, wrapping her legs around Talia’s abdomen to apply a body scissors, holding it in as she now pushes herself forward. Talia finally drops to the mat, forwards, in between the ropes and the center of the ring as Ykaterina keeps the sleeper in and rolls herself over so that her back is on the mat and the two of them are both facing up. Down on the mat, Talia resumes struggling, pulling Ykaterina’s arms as far apart as she can, although the sleeper remains locked in. Soon, Talia’s struggling ends, and the referee walks over to the two, checking to see if Talia has lost consciousness. He raises one of her arms and lets go. It drops. Again, he raises it and lets go, and it drops. Once more, he raises the arm up, and lets go. It drops, but suddenly stops dropping as the arm bends as Talia begins elbowing Ykaterina in the side to try to get the hold broken. After enough elbows, Milosanova is forced break the hold as Talia pulls herself out; gasping for breath—but the body scissors is still locked in. Talia turns over, onto her hands and knees as she attempts to get up to her feet, but Ykaterina begins forearming her in the back of the head, bringing her down to her stomach. Ykaterina pivots her body so that it is laying sideways, reaching over the far side of Talia with one arm and hooking it around her shoulder as she simultaneously reaches over to Talia’s neck with the other arm, attempting to lock a half nelson in.*

Tom: Talia Bell’s been able to free herself from the sleeper, but the ever-tenacious Ykaterina Milosanova’s now going for her Reki Stretch!

Jeannie: I still wanna know, what’s a “Reki?”

Tom: My guess is that it is, of course, Russian; it’s also a submission hold that Ykaterina used to eliminate Cyberonix Excess and advance to the Final Three of the Ten Woman Elimination match at Attrition! Talia’s going to need to stay out of this hold, or it could very well be over for her here…

*Talia struggles to keep the half nelson part of the hold from being locked in, holding Ykaterina’s arm with one of her own and punching Ykaterina’s side with the other one. Ykaterina struggles to get the hold completed but can’t seem to do it; Talia continues to punch away as Ykaterina’s grip is slipping and the body scissors is loosening up. Finally, Talia’s continual punching gets the hold entirely loosened up, and she scrambles up to her feet, with assistance from the ropes, her breathing heavy and her face beet-red. Ykaterina gets up to her feet, her hands on her sides as she walks toward the New Zealander. Milosanova throws a kick at Talia, but Bell catches it with both of her hands, quickly spinning her leg around and causing Ykaterina to spin around with it. Just after Ykaterina turns 360 degrees, Talia grabs her in a suplex position, hooking one of the legs and turning around, her back facing the center of the ring as she falls back to execute a fisherman’s suplex, keeping the leg hooked. The referee drops down to count the pin.*

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Ykaterina kicks out again!

Jeannie: But she’d be wise not to let Talia pull another suplex like THAT on her again anytime soon. I think Talia might be starting to get a little worn down though.

*At this kickout, Talia gets to one knee, breathing no lighter than before, and looking all the more frustrated than before with both of her eyebrows sharply slanted down over eyes. Talia grabs Ykaterina by the head and drags her over to the bottom rope nearest to them, placing Milosanova’s throat across the rope as she stomps a boot hard atop Ykaterina’s upper back and pushes her down, choking her across the rope as the crowd boos in disapproval. The referee admonishes Talia Bell for this and begins a count, warning her of a possible disqualification if she maintains it for too long…*

Jeannie: Great move!

Tom: Yeah, if you like to treat sportsmanship like it doesn’t exist anymore.

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*Talia releases the choke at the last second, lifting her boot off of the Russian’s back as she takes a few steps back and away from the ropes, narrowly avoiding the end of the count. Talia picks up Ykaterina, lifting her high above her head with a grunt, Milosanova sitting atop her shoulders. Talia leans forward to execute an electric chair drop, but Milosanova rolls forward and through it with a victory roll, hooking a leg.*

Tom: Victory roll from Ykaterina!

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KICKOUT!

Tom: Not quite there! Kickout from Talia.

Jeannie: What else is wrong with Buff Bagwell?

Tom: Well, what about American Males? They weren’t exactly the Dudley Boys or the Hart Foundation. And that theme song! Now quiet. There’s a match going on here and you’re not exactly giving as much respect to it as you could.

*Talia kicks out as both of them roll through in opposite directions and jump up to their feet. They turn around and charge at each other. Ykaterina wins out by taking Talia to the mat with a tilt-a-whirl takeover. They both get up. Undeterred, Talia charges at Ykaterina, but Ykaterina catches her with an armdrag. Still undeterred, Talia gets up and charges at Ykaterina. However, Ykaterina catches her foot and hits her with a dragon screw leg whip. Talia gets up as Ykaterina charges at her. She jumps onto Talia’s shoulders going for a hurricanrana. However, Talia counters with a powerbomb. Talia hangs onto Ykaterina’s legs, picks her up, spins Ykaterina around, and drops her to the mat with another powerbomb.*

Tom: Safety Last from Talia Bell! Talia’s giving clear display of her physical power, especially for someone her size!

Jeannie: I can’t believe you harbor ill will toward Buff Bagwell. He nearly broke his neck and developed spinal shock in a match with Rick Steiner, you know!

Tom: What does that have to do with anything!?

Jeannie: It…uh…shut up!

*Talia picks up Ykaterina and hits her with a few elbow strikes. Then, she whips Ykaterina into a corner. Talia charges at Ykaterina, but she tops Talia with a boot to the face. Talia spins around, and Ykaterina climbs up onto the second rope. She waits for Talia to turn around. She does, and Ykaterina jumps off. However, Talia catches Ykaterina, holds her with a bearhug, charges at the corner, and squashes Ykaterina into the corner. Talia punches Ykaterina a few times and then climbs up to the second rope. Then, she puts Ykaterina onto her shoulders. Milosanova struggles wildly, repeatedly elbowing Talia in the side of the head. A bit stunned but not quite out of it, Talia spins around, falling backwards and planting Ykaterina into the ring mat with a gigantic Samoan Drop before hooking a leg!*

1!




2!




*Milosanova gets a foot on the bottom rope.*

Tom: I think Talia was going her the Steamboat Jr.—a death valley driver—but by the circumstances was unable to execute that move, possibly saving Milosanova, despite the power of that Samoan Drop that was executed!

*Talia gets up and pulls Ykaterina away from the ropes. Then, she pulls Ykaterina’s legs up, trying to go for a submission hold. However, Ykaterina counters by rolling Talia up for a pin.*

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

*Talia gets up and grabs Ykaterina. But, Ykaterina thrust her head into Talia’s stomach. Talia bends over, and Ykaterina gets up and wraps her arm around Talia’s neck, trying to go for a DDT. However, Talia grabs Ykaterina’s tights, picks her up, runs to the ropes, and throws Ykaterina out of the ring. Ykaterina manages to land on her feet. Talia climbs up the top turnbuckle and jumps off. However, Ykaterina surprise Talia with a dropkick. Talia falls to the floor. The ref begins a ten count.*

1…*Ykaterina gets up.*

2…*Ykaterina walks over to Talia and grabs her head.*

3…*Ykaterina picks up Talia and places her near the ring post.*

4…*Ykaterina whips Talia into the corner of the guardrails.*

5…*Ykaterina charges at Talia and jumps onto the steel steps.*

6…*Ykaterina jumps off the steps, but Talia moves out of the way.*

7…*Ykaterina hits the guardrail and falls to the floor, with her right leg getting caught up in the guardrail.*

8…*Talia gets up and rolls into the ring. Then she rolls out to break the count.*

Tom: Sweet Something Of Someplace! Ykaterina takes a high risk with a flying move from the steps, but Talia moves out of the way!

Jeannie: Here’s another interesting fact about Buff Bagwell…

Tom: For the love of God, SHUT UP! SHUT UP! Don't you EVER say another word about Buff Bagwell!

Jeannie: Okay, okay! Jeez!

*The ref starts the count again.*

1…*Talia takes a breather.*

2…*Ykaterina sits up, trying to free herself.*

3…*Talia sees this and charges at Ykaterina.*

4…*Talia sweeps Ykaterina’s free leg, knocking her back down.*

5…*Talia punches Ykaterina’s knee several times.*

6…*Talia then walks over to the timekeeper’s area and grabs a chair.*

7…*Talia then walks back to Ykaterina.*

*The ref exits the ring and gets in front of Talia. He grabs the chair and tries to pull it from Talia’s hand. They wrestle over it as Ykaterina gets up and manages to finally free herself. The ref finally gets the chair away from Talia. He then walks over to return it to the timekeeper’s area. As he does this, Talia turns her attention to Ykaterina. She charges at Ykaterina and dropkicks her injured knee. She falls to her knees. Then, Talia gets up, picks up Ykaterina, and drops her knee first onto the steel steps. The crowd boos loudly. Ykaterina yells out in pain. Talia then quickly grabs Ykaterina and throws her into the ring as the ref turns around.*

Tom: Son of a bitch! Talia Bell just dropped Ykaterina Milosanova knee first onto the steel steps!

Jeannie: Oh, that’s gotta hurt like dislocated knee cap, which may have happen to Ykaterina. I think the ref should check to see if Ykaterina can continue with this match.

Tom: But…what!? Since when do you care?

Jeannie: You can be scary sometimes.

*Talia and the ref re-enter the ring. The ref sees Ykaterina rolling on the mat in pain holding her knee. He checks on her, but Talia doesn’t give him a chance to see just how bad her injured leg is. Talia grabs the leg and kicks the back of it several times. Then, Talia suddenly DDTs Ykaterina’s knee onto her own knee. Ykaterina yells out in pain. However, that doesn’t stop Talia from getting up and DDTing Ykaterina’s knee onto her knee again. Talia gets up again, kicks the back of Ykaterina’s knee a few more times, and then locks her into a Texas cloverleaf.*

Jeannie: Talia Bell is showing how vicious she can be. She just relentlessly attacked that knee and now has Ykaterina locked into the Texas cloverleaf.

Tom: I don't think she's winning any awards for honor here tonight, but is's a good strategy. Ykaterina's mobility and flexibility is one of her key advantages, and if Talia can deny her that, that's something that can really change the playing field here tonight.

*Talia has the move locked on tight. Ykaterina yells out in pain. The ref asks her if she wants to give up, Ykaterina says “No.” Talia pulls back on the submission hold, and Ykaterina lets out a primal scream. Talia has the move locked on for a good two or three minutes. However, no matter how many times the ref asks, Ykaterina won’t submit; nor will she tap out. In the crowd, a small “Ykaterina” chant is heard. After several seconds, it gets louder. It starts building momentum and gets louder and louder. Soon, it covers the whole W*I*G-sphere. Suddenly, Ykaterina starts to push up off the mat. The chanting is working as Ykaterina starts crawling to the ropes. Talia tries to pull Ykaterina back to the center of the ring. However, this doesn’t work as it takes pressure off of Ykaterina’s knee and actually allows her to get closer to the ropes. Ykaterina reaches out to the ropes as the chants for her continue. Suddenly, Ykaterina grabs the bottom ropes. The crowd cheers loudly. Unfortunately for them and Ykaterina, Talia won’t let go of the hold. The ref tells her to let go, but Talia refuses. So, he begins a count.*

1!

2!

3!

4!

*Suddenly, Ykaterina grabs the second rope with her other hand and uses the ropes as leverage to throw Talia off with her legs. Talia goes rolling over onto the mat. She sits up and looks shocked as hell. All the while, the crowd cheers loudly.*

Jeannie: Whoa!

Tom: Hot damn! Ykaterina manages to fling Talia off of her legs!

Jeannie: Man, and the fans are on their feet.

Tom: With the way she’s kept even with Talia Bell despite what’s happened to her earlier, I can’t say that I’m altogether surprised.

*Ykaterina pulls herself up with the ropes. Talia gets up as well. Ykaterina tries to charge at Talia, but her knee prevents her from running a full speed. Talia also charges at Ykaterina and hits her with a spear that sends Ykaterina falling back into the ropes. Talia gets up. She then runs to the opposite ropes, bounces off of them, charges at Ykaterina, and hits her in the back of the head with a springboard feint roundhouse kick. Ykaterina falls to mat. Talia then rushes over to her and pins her.*

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

Tom: Vanishing Point from Talia Bell, but it can’t keep Ykaterina down. Nevertheless, it was a fine-looking move.

Jeannie: You say it’s “fine” and then you lambast me for complimenting the guys? What gives?

*Talia gets up. She stomps on Ykaterina’s leg a few times. Then, she grabs it and tries to lock Ykaterina into a sharpshooter. However, Ykaterina is able to hold her off. She suddenly rolls Talia up for a pin.*

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

*Talia kicks out and kips up. Ykaterina gets up onto her knees. Suddenly, Talia goes for a roundhouse kick; but Ykaterina ducks. Talia swings around, and Ykaterina stands up, picking Talia up onto her shoulders. However, Ykaterina’s knee suddenly gives out. She crumples to the mat, and Talia lands onto her feet. Talia then runs to the ropes. As she bounces off of them, Ykaterina gets up onto her knees. Talia charges at Ykaterina and hits her in the face with a knee strike. Ykaterina falls back onto the mat. Talia then bends over and picks up Ykaterina. Then, she lifts Ykaterina up, holds her up on her shoulders for a good minute or two, and then drops her to the mat with a vicious thunderfire powerbomb. Talia drops down and covers Ykaterina.*

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

Tom: Ykaterina Milosanova kicks out of the Cliffhanger!

Jeannie: Yeah, but the pain that she’s got to be feeling right about now isn’t going to make it any easier next time.

*The crowd cheers loudly at the kickout. Talia slaps the mat in frustration several times. She grabs her hair, pulling a little of it out, and lets out a deafening scream. Talia then gets up, picks up Ykaterina, and hits her with a lifting double underhook facebuster. She then rolls Ykaterina over and pins her.*

1!




2!




KICKOUT!

*The crowd cheers loudly. Talia looks a little defeated and highly confused.*

Tom: Once again! Ykaterina kicks out, this time from Amsterdamned! And, Talia looks like she’s trying to solve the square root of 24,863 in her head; she can’t figure it out.

Jeannie: Well I mean, I don’t get this…why won’t this woman stay down?

Tom: Ykaterina’s taken a hell of a pummeling but she’s staying sharp. Talia Bell, on the other hand, is in a better physical way, but she’s becoming extremely tired and her mind isn’t as focused right now as it could be.

*Talia gets up. She grabs her hair and pulls out a little more of her hair. Then, she looks at the corner. An evil grin comes across her face. She walks over to the corner and climbs up to the top turnbuckle. Then, she waits for Ykaterina to get up. She doesn’t have to wait for long as Ykaterina slowly gets up, hopping on her good leg. Then, Talia jumps off, going for a missile dropkick. Suddenly, Ykaterina sidesteps Talia, jumps up, and hits her square in the head with a Pele kick. The crowd cheers wildly as both women fall to the mat.*

Tom: Great Lenin’s Ghost! Ykaterina out of nowhere with the Pele kick! Talia miscalculated with that missile dropkick. She took a risk and it didn’t pay off!

*With both women on the mat, the ref begins a 10 count.*

1…

2…

3…*Talia and Ykaterina start stirring around.*

4…*Talia rolls over.*

5…*Ykaterina bends her knee a few times to get some feeling into it.*

6…*Talia gets up onto her hands and knees.*

7…*Ykaterina rolls over and starts crawling to the ropes.*

8…*Talia gets up onto her knees.*

9…*Ykaterina reaches the ropes and pulls herself up. Talia also gets up onto her feet.*

*Talia and Ykaterina turn around to face each other. Talia charges at Ykaterina, and Ykaterina hops toward her as well. Suddenly, Ykaterina goes for a big boot. However, Talia just grabs her foot. She just stares at Ykaterina and laughs. Then, Ykaterina suddenly swings her other leg around for an enziguiri. Unfortunately for Ykaterina, Talia ducks; Ykaterina is able to land her foot onto the mat. Talia sits up and laughs. But, this is a big mistake. Ykaterina swings her foot around and kicks Talia right in the face. Talia goes flying to the ropes. Ykaterina falls to the mat. Talia bounces off the ropes. Ykaterina gets up, grabs Talia, and hits her with a hip toss. Talia lands on her feet and turns around. Suddenly, Ykaterina jumps up and manages to get onto Talia’s shoulders. She goes for a hurricanrana, but Talia stops her from flipping over. Talia then lifts Ykaterina up and goes for a powerbomb. However, Ykaterina slips out of it, grabs Talia’s head as she falls down, and hits her with a DDT. The crowd goes wild for the surprise counter.*

Tom: Hot Damn! What a counter from Ykaterina—a fine DDT!

Jeannie: That was impressive, but she’s still hurting pretty badly from all those attacks to the leg earlier.

*Ykaterina gets up onto her knees. She crawls over to the ropes and pulls herself up with them. She hops around a little and bends her knee to get some feeling back into it. Meanwhile, Talia starts stirring around. She rolls over onto her hands and knees and shakes her head. Then, she sees Ykaterina, not paying attention to Talia. Talia smiles evilly and gets up. Then, she charges at Ykaterina. Ykaterina turns around and sees Talia coming. So, she ducks as Talia goes for a clothesline. Ykaterina rolls over across the ring to the opposite ropes. Talia turns around and charges at Ykaterina as she gets up. However, Ykaterina runs at her as well and, rolling forward surprises Talia with an abisegiri. Talia falls to the mat.*

Tom: Great Gorbachev! Nemodno to Talia Bell! Ykaterina is holding her opponent off well with a bum knee and she’s still in this!

Jeannie: Doesn’t this remind you of how Buff Bagwell was still able to beat Rick Steiner with a broken freakin’ neck!

Tom: For the love of God! Stop bringing up Buff Bagwell!

Jeannie: Okay, fine! But I can tell you right now that it's not doing me much "good" staring at two women wrestling each other without SOME kind of masculinity involved.

Tom: Hello! I'm sitting RIGHT HERE.

Jeannie: And your point is...?

*Ykaterina gets up and limps over to the corner to get a breather. Talia then rolls over onto her hands and knees. She grabs her jaw and rubs it. Then, she gets up. Ykaterina notices and moves behind Talia. Then, she suddenly jumps onto Talia’s shoulders from behind; dives off her shoulders with her legs in a pike shape, holding Talia’s head; and rolls forward, sending Talia flipping forward and landing onto her back and neck. Talia sits up, holding her head.*

Tom: Hungover Hurricane from Ykaterina! She’s on fire now! If she keeps this up, then she can win the match and keep her knee out of more danger.

*Ykaterina gets up to her feet rather slowly, still strongly favoring her leg after being targeted so many times as Talia pulls herself up, her hands over her head in pain. Talia charges at Ykaterina, throwing a clothesline that misses as Milosanova ducks under it. As Talia turns around, Ykaterina, using her better leg, sweep kicks both of Talia’s legs out from under her as Bell falls to her knees. Milosanova pushes herself up, one hand over the knee of the bad leg as she throws a forearm at the recovering Talia, sending the New Zealander staggering backwards. Talia responds with a forearm of her own, sending Ykaterina back, who retaliates with a forearm of her own. The two come to blows, trading forearms in an alternating manner. Finally, Talia gets the advantage, whipping a limping Milosanova towards the ropes as she runs in the opposite direction, rebounding off as Milosanova comes bouncing back. Talia throws a wide lariat that Ykaterina ducks right underneath, spinning around behind a confused Talia and elbowing her in the back of the head. Milosanova aligns herself back-to-back with Talia Bell and lifts her up off the mat, their arms interlocked.*

Tom: I KNOW what this is—the Sloboizverzhenie!

Jeannie: A move that is almost as difficult to pronounce as it is dangerous!

*Ykaterina prepares to jump upwards and back, but her once-again buckling knee slows her down substantially. With this, Talia begins struggling, reaching one arm around towards the masked face of Ykaterina Milosanova. Just as Milosanova finally leans up, a hand from Talia Bell lifts her mask up from her face, exposing her mouth and pulling the eyeholes to her forehead. Milosanova immediately releases Bell, instinctively covering her face to prevent it from being completely unmasked as Talia slips out behind her. Ykaterina is completely blinded—she attempts to readjust her mask, rotating the eyeholes back into their proper location, but is turned around by Talia. Milosanova instinctively tries to dodge back, but her leg slows her down significantly, allowing Talia to easily hit her in the face with a knee strike. Then, she picks up Ykaterina with a gutwrench lift, spins her around, and drops her into a reverse DDT. Talia then grabs Ykaterina’s leg for a pin, pulling up on her tights for good measure.*

1!




2!




3!

*The bell rings, the crowd boos, and Talia’s music plays. Talia jumps up in victory. The referee holds up her hand.*

Tom: Dammit! Talia wins with the Ship’s Mast and some blatant cheating!

Jeannie: Well, the match is over…if Ykaterina Milosanova hadn’t been “Russian” to keep that useless mask of hers over her face and just went for the Sloboizver-genie-or-whatever-the-hell-it’s-called like she was going to do, maybe she wouldn’t have eaten a spear AND a Ship’s Mast in such a way. You make this all sound like its Talia’s fault.

Tom: And you make it sound like that’s all I’m referring to. Ladies and gentlemen, forgive me: my partner here tonight seems to be forgetting what constitutes real sportsmanship in the ring. What JUST happened is one of those things that the rules don’t provide any protection against, and frankly, it’s a pity that’s the way it is.

*Ykaterina leans up very slightly, her head just off of the mat; one hand on her knee and one hand on her mask, which she is finally able to adjust, looking in the direction of the still-celebrating Talia Bell. When Talia sees Milosanova has regained consciousness, she quickly rolls herself out of the ring, backing her way up the ramp as she raises her arms up. Milosanova, on her knees, leans over the middle rope with one hand on the back of her head, tilted sideways in both a daze and utter confusion.*
Tom: Talia Bell doesn’t seem interested to continue the conflict—

Jeannie: You mean like Bu—

Tom: NO!

Jeannie: Eh...and who can blame her? In fact, Ykaterina’s lucky that Talia left the ring instead of hanging with her. Do you think that in the way she’s in right now, she’d be able to put up much of a fight, much less keep Talia at bay?

Tom: Yeesh, let me finish here! She may not seem interested in continuing this, but seeing as how very easily this match could’ve gone the other way, I’ve got a very strong suspicion that Ykaterina Milosanova isn’t going to let this rest the way it is and that another match between these two women could certainly be on the horizon…

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

Finkel: The following contest will be a STEEL CAGE MATCH!

-The audience cheer as the menacing steel structure is displayed-

Finkel: The only way to win is for BOTH members of a single team to escape with both feet touching the floor! Introducing first..

-"All Hope Is Gone" marks the arrival of Victor Trauma and Tommy Fright who seem to get a bigger ovation each time they make an appearance-

Finkel: At a combined weight of 550 pounds..Victor Trauma and Tommy Fright, Trauma + Fright!

-No flash or pyro the men simply enter the ring via the cage doors and take a look around their steel surroundings. They seem quite eager for their opponents to arrive-

Jeannie: The bravery, and not to mention the hotness, of Team Ireland never ceases to amaze me! Captain Donnelly and The Don are giving up a TON of size to these two!

Tom: Bravery? With all due respect to the abilities of Team Ireland, I have to question their logic in this one. Let's be frank, Team Ireland is known for their treachery..

Jeannie: Crafty! They're just crafty!

Tom: ..and in a steel cage they're trapped with no assistance from the rest of the group! And by the looks of things, Trauma and Fright are chomping at the bit to get this one under way.

*The familiar threatening strains of Dropkick Murphys' "I'm Shipping Up To Boston" begin to spread throughout the W*I*G-Sphere. The crowd are booing immediately before Team Ireland have even stepped through the curtain. Aidan Donnelly is first out, he is, as usual, draped in the Tricolour. Following closely behind him is Sean McCann, carrying a bottle of Feckin' Irish Whiskey. Sean nips around in front of Aidan, dropping down to a knee & spreading his arms wide as Aidan holds the Tricolour aloft behind his head & the Green, White & Gold pyro goes off.*

Finkel: Introducing their opponents, proudly representing their home country of Ireland, at a total combined weight of 396lbs... "The Don Juan of Donegal" Sean McCann & Captain Aidan Donnelly... TEAAAAAAAAAM... IRRRRE~LAAAAANNNNNND!!!

*Aidan drops the Tricolour back down around his shoulders as Sean springs up to his feet. The two slap hands before continuing on down to the ring. Sean pours a mouthful of whiskey down his throat as he & Aidan carry on down the ramp. He hands the bottle off to Aidan when they reach the foot of the ramp.*

Tom: Yet again, Team Ireland are out here without Coach O'Hare. What gives?

Jeannie: You said yourself Tom, they're locked in there with Trauma + Fright, what good would having the Coach at ringside do them in a situation like that?

*As they approach the cage, Aidan opts to enter through the cage door, held open by a ringside attendant. Sean, however, scales the outside of the cage, hanging from the top & holding his crotch as he looks in on Trauma + Fright. Sean clambers onto the top of the cage. Discarding his shades & jacket, Sean makes his way down the opposite side of the steel bars. Aidan, meanwhile, drapes the Tricolour over the top rope & takes a swig from the whiskey bottle himself.*

DING-DING!

-As the two teams settle into place, we begin our match with Tommy Fright and Sean McCann. McCann sizes the much bigger Fright up before starting to circle him. Fright just seems to smirk in amusement. The Don rushes at him from the side but Fright swiftly turns around and plants a big boot right into his jaw-

Jeannie: Oh no, poor Sean! That's not the way to go about it!

Tom: Sean isn't exactly the brains of Team Ireland.

-Fright snatches Sean up and sends him flying with a side belly to belly suplex. McCann already looks to be in pain as Fright stalks his way towards him. Sean tries to crawl between Fright's legs to get to his corner but is caught by his ankle. Sean hops about on one foot for a moment before connecting with an Enziguri that connects with the bald head of Fright. McCann connects with a dropkick to the leg that takes the 300 pounder down to one knee. McCann hurriedly sprints to the apron and tries a springboard clothesline but is just about decapitated with a rising clothesline.-

Tom: This will not be pretty.

Jeannie: I...I just can't watch.

-Fright drags McCann to a corner where he tags in his partner, Victor Trauma. Trauma whips McCann into a turnbuckle and charges him, connecting with a huge running dropkick to the chest. McCann slumps downwards and Trauma pulls him up once again. Just to send him sailing to his corner where he motions for Donnelly to get into the ring. With a scowl, Donnelly reaches down and tags himself into the ring before slowly slipping inside-

Jeannie: Alright, this is where The Captain turns things around.

-The two circle one another, about to lock up, when Aidan surprises his opponent with a rake to the eyes. Stunned, Trauma is then nailed with a pair of European uppercuts. Trauma is backed into a corner and given a few stomps to the gut. He attempts a northern lights suplex, but Trauma counters with a few elbows to the shoulders. Aidan staggers backwards and leaps for a crossbody but Trauma is able to catch him. After only a moment, he responds with a fall-away slam over the ropes and right into the steel!-

Tom: And the steel structure comes into play for the first time!

-Aidan is sling shot back into the ring with a rough landing on his back. He's tossed into the ropes where McCann makes a blind tag. Aidan ducks a clothesline attempt and as this happens, McCann slithers into the ring to catch Trauma with a superkick. Almost at the same moment, Donnelly rebounds with a chopblock and the combined move takes Trauma down-

Jeannie: Ah-ha! Superior team work!

-The two members of Team Ireland bring Trauma to his feet and proceed to toss him into the steel. Flesh always loses and Victor crashes into the mat. After Aidan is forced into his corner, McCann responds with a few stomps to his downed foe. He scales to the top and looks for a moonsault but Tommy Fright pulls his legs out from under him while on the apron-

Jeannie: What was that?!

Tom: A little taste of Team Ireland's own medicine, I'd say.

-After taking a moment to recover, Trauma scales the ropes behind Sean, adjusts him accordingly, and drops him down from the middle rope with a Falcon Arrow! Deciding to continue the punishment, a tag is made and both men size up Sean, who is staggering to his feet. Once he gets there, he's wiped out with a double diving shoulder block, that sends him flying once again. Fright goes to snatch Sean up but is caught with a low blow from the still dizzy "ladies man". Angered by this, Trauma grabs Sean from behind him and hurls him towards the cage. However, he is amazingly able to grasp the bars and prevent from smacking straight into it. Captain Donnelly sneaks up from behind and unexpectedly drops Trauma with a reverse ddt. While this is going on, Sean has scaled higher and higher.-

Tom: Look at this! I think Sean is going for an escape!

-Donnelly further connects with a lungblower while Sean has made it to the top. Suddenly, and with pin-point accuracy, he dives off and lands with a double foot stomp right into Trauma's chest!-

Tom: All-Ireland Finale! Spectacular!

-While a replay is being shown, Aidan instructs Sean to once again climb while their opponents are both down. Aidan follows shortly afterwards. Both men reach the middle of the cage when Fright begins to climb up after them. They try to stomp him down but it's no good. The 6'7'' giant eases up behind both men and is able to get them both on each shoulder. He falls backwards from the great height and flattens them both with a double electric chair! This obviously takes a great deal out of him as well. Everyone is down as the crowd has really come to life-

Tom: Carnage everywhere! All four men are down!

Jeannie: It's like a car crash in there!

-After some time, Victor Trauma and Aidan Donnelly are the first two to return to their feet. The pair begin to slug it out before Aidan hits Trauma with a knee to the gut. He hits the ropes but gets a stiff boot to the stomach for his troubles. Trauma grips Aidan by the throat with both hands and in one single motion, tosses him up onto his shoulders. Sprinting forward, he releases him with a powerbomb that sends The Captain over the ropes and back first into the steel!-

Tom: Blunt Force Trauma! Aidan Donnelly just took a hell of a ride there!

-Quickly afterwards, Trauma is wiped out from his standing position by a moonsault from McCann. He spots Fright trying to get back to his feet so he rushes him with a low dropkick to the face. Fright falls over but gets to his knees once more. McCann takes a wild swing but Fright ducks the attempt and locks him into a cobra clutch. Getting back to his feet while still having the move applied, his hoists his opponent skywards and drops him onto his knee with a backbreaker. Fright steps to Trauma and shakes him about, helping him get to his feet. The two begin a climb upwards as Aidan rolls back under the ropes, busted open. Seemingly from landing on the apron after his flight-

Jeannie: This is where Team Ireland have the advantage! They're going to be able to climb that cage A LOT faster!

-Trauma and Fright have now reached the middle of the cage when Sean McCann hits Fright right in the ribs with a springboard dropkick. Both men plummet to the mat below. Trauma continues to climb with a bloodied Aidan right behind him. Trauma gets the top and has one leg over, drawing some loud cheers, before Aidan halts his momentum with a clubbing blow to the back. A few more are given but Trauma still tries to make it over. Aidan locks his boots into the cage and grips Trauma around the waist. After pulling for dear life both men go sailing backwards from a German Suplex! They both collapse in the ring and once again bodies are laying everywhere-

*Sean starts to twitch a little bit & takes a brief look around him at his opponents & team-mate layed out in the ring. Sean makes his way towards the ropes, crawling along at a very slow pace. He reaches out to the bottom rope & uses it to pull himself up & help regain his footing a little bit. After another cursory glance around the ring, Sean decides now may be as good a time as any to attempt escape. He begins to scale the cage, albeit at a much slower pace than he would had he not been involved in such a bracing fight. When Sean is about halfway up the cage, Tommy Fright & Aidan Donnelly are both starting to come 'round. Fright pushes himself up off the mat & begins to go after Sean. Aidan slows Fright down by grabbing at his ankle. Fright stomps at Aidan's hands & manages to escape his grip. However, it may have been enough of a distraction as Sean is now nearing the top of the cage. Fright makes his way up after Sean. Sean has just reached the very top & is about to drop down the other side. But Fright manages to snag Sean before he can go over the top. Fright tries his best to Superplex Sean from the top of the cage, but Sean grips the top bar of the cage very tightly & Fright is having problems getting enough torque to shift Sean back in.*

Tom: Sean McCann was mere seconds away from completing his escape before he was caught by Victor Fright! Now we have the pair battling at the top of the cage to see who can get whom back into the ring.

*Fright, however, is soon attacked by Aidan. Aidan strikes Fright a few clubbing blows to the back then climbs the ropes right behind him, grabbing Fright with a waistlock & trying to give him the same treatment he gave his partner earlier in the match. Aidan can't seem to manage to give Fright a German Suplex, though, try as he might. However, all three men are soon joined by Trauma. Trauma sneaks in under where Aidan stands, positioning himself so that Aidan's legs are on his shoulders. Trauma uses all his strength to force Aidan down to the mat with a Powerbomb which in turn sends Fright & Sean crashing back into the ring! After such a feat, Trauma falls down to one knee while the crowd goes berserk!*

"HO~LY SHIT! HO~LY SHIT!"

Mike Tenay: TOWER OF DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!

Jeannie: Where the hell did he come from?

Tom: None the less, an apt call.

*All four men are lying about the ring again. Trauma being the only one who is not completely immobilized. He stumbles over to Fright, shaking him back to consciousness. Fright stirs ever so slightly. He begins to sit up a little bit, nursing his back with his right hand & his the back of his head & neck with his left. Trauma checks on Fright to see if he's in any condition to start climbing the Cage. Fright responds by taking a deep breath, pounding his chest & letting out a long gutteral roar that draws the crowd's approval.*

Tom: And now the team of Trauma + Fright are ready to go again. This could be nearly the end of this match!

*The moment of celebration is short-lived, however, as Aidan Donnelly attacks quickly with a Chop Block on Fright who falls down to a knee. Aidan still seems to be having back problems of his own as he nurses his lower back upon standing again. He doesn't have long to muse on the problem as he's soon in the grip of Trauma. Trauma tries to force Aidan's already bloody face against the steel bars of the cage, but a quick elbow thrown backwards at Trauma's chest is enough of a distraction that Aidan is able to drive his enemy's face into the metal. Aidan bashes Trauma's face against the bars of the cage until there is blood dripping from his forehead. Trauma can be heard groaning in pain.*

Jeannie: Oh, thank God Aidan prevented Trauma from bashing his face into the bars again.

Tom: Yeah, never mind that Aidan smashed Trauma's face into the steel cage...

*Aidan tries to take Trauma back down with a Russian Leg Sweep, but Trauma is wily enough to hold on to the bars of the cage & Aidan falls back to the mat alone, not harming his opponent. Trauma takes a moment to regain his composure then bends over to raise Aidan up. Aidan tries to fight back from his grounded position, kicking his legs wildly at his opponent. Aidan rolls backwards & stands again. Aidan dodges a Clothesline from Victor & knees him in the gut a few times. Trauma is doubled over & Aidan sets him up for a Suplex. Trauma resists Aidan's attempts to lift him, though & he gives Donnelly a few digs in the ribs. Trauma lifts Aidan right up for a Vertical Suplex. He holds Aidan up for an age, the blood rushing to Aidan's head. Trauma walks backwards towards the cage & hits Aidan's back against the unyielding steel. He walks towards another part of the cage & bashes Aidan's back against the steel bars on that side too. Trauma spins around & around before he drops Aidan to the mat.*

Tom: A LOOOONG Vertical Suplex for Aidan Donnelly with the added impact of the Cage bars. I'd say the Team Ireland Captain isn't feeling great right now.

*While all this has been going on, Fright & Sean have been slugging it out. The biggest & smallest men in the match clash. Fright obliterates Sean with a Charging Shoulder Block. Sean flops back against the bars of the cage. Fright aims a punch right at Sean's face. Sean ducks & Fright hits has knuckles against the cage bars. Fright recoils & shakes his hand a little bit. Sean sneaks behind Fright & Dropkicks him, right in the back, sending him face first against the metal fencing. Fright has now also been bloodied. He turns around to face Sean, the blood running down his face makes Fright seem even more imposing than before. Sean is about to turn tail & run, but Fright grabs Sean by his long-ish blonde locks & knees him in the stomach. "The Don Juan of Donegal" is doubled over, Fright hoists him up onto his shoulder & charges right towards the cage, driving Sean's beautiful face repeatedly into the bars.*

Jeannie: Oh, Sean, not you too!

*With Sean sufficiently dazed, Fright picks the now-bloodied Irishman up in a Powerbomb position. Fright runs towards the cage with Sean held high, driving Sean's back into the steel before spinning around & dropping him with a Sit-Out Powerbomb!*

Tom: Sean gets the Cage treatment too before being destroyed with that Powerbomb! Team Ireland appear to be overmatched in this instance.

*Trauma + Fright look up at one another then run together & butt chests in the middle of the ring. The two men then make haste to opposite sides of the cage to make their exit. As they do so, Aidan starts crawling towards the middle of the ring. Aidan pounds his fist on the mat four times before rolling over onto his back. At this, a small implement appears from near the point where Aidan had just been pounding the mat. The implement appears to be a blade of some sort. The canvas begins to tear as a familiar Tricolour-wrapped Hurley pokes up through the mat, it's followed by another familiar figure: that of Coach O'Hare!*

Tom: What the...? He... He was under there all night?

Jeannie: Apparently so. Team Ireland ALWAYS have a back-up plan!

*O'Hare drags out behind him several other Hurleys as well as a few steel chairs. He tosses a chair at Fright, nailing him right in the back. O'Hare, Hurley still in hand, scurries up the cage behind Victor Trauma & manages to hook him around the waist with the Hurley. Simply allowing himself to fall down, O'Hare drags Trauma with him. Both men are hurt, but Trauma moreso than the Coach due to the cumulative damage of working a gruelling match.*

Tom: I don't even know how to describe this! Coach O'Hare was hiding under the ring all night so he could wait & ambush Trauma + Fright in this cage match! Unbelievable!

*O'Hare manges to rouse Aidan & Sean somewhat as the two of them begin to put the boots to a momentarily downed Trauma + Fright, beating them repeatedly with the steel chairs provided by Coach O'Hare. O'Hare makes his way towards the cage door, ordering that it be opened, the official complies & O'Hare snaps the key off him as he makes his way out. O'Hare fumbles around under the ring before dragging out a table & sliding it into the ring. O'Hare sets the table up nearby to a corner while Aidan & Sean continue to lay into their opponents. The three Irishmen drag Fright away & set him up on the corner nearest the table.*

Tom: I'm not sure I like what Team Ireland have planned here.

Jeannie: Whatever it is, I don't think it's going to end well for Victor Trauma!

*Aidan & Sean climb to the top rope & fly off with a flip, driving Trauma through the table with "Aer Lingus" as they do so!*

Tom: "Aer Lingus" through the table & all three are down. But Coach O'Hare is trying to get his charges up to leave the cage.

*As O'Hare tries to get Aidan & Sean moving again, Tommy Fright is getting back to his feet. Fright reaches out & grabs O'Hare by the back of the neck. The Coach can't escape the big man's grip. It isn't until Sean & Aidan are back again that they can rescue the Coach. Sean nails Fright with a low-blow while Aidan takes a swig from the Whiskey bottle & spits it into Fright's eyes!*

Tom: Oh, now that's just absolutely vile.

Jeannie: But imagine that, Tom. Whiskey spat right into your eyes, and with that bloody forehead of Fright's too, just how much that alcohol must sting.

*With Fright blinded for a moment, Aidan hands the Whiskey to the Coach. O'Hare takes a swig for himself & then smashes the bottle over Fright's head. Team Ireland then make their way out of the cage through the door.*

DING-DING-DING!

*"I'm Shipping Up To Boston" begins to play again.*

Finkel: Here are your winners... TEEEEEEEAAAAAM IRRRRRRRE~LAAAAAAAANNNNND!!!

*O'Hare, Sean & Aidan hug eachother once they reach the ringside floor. The crowd boo vehemently & throw trash at the Irish trio as the start to make their way to the back.*

Tom: What a disaster for Trauma + Fright. They thought they had Team Ireland at their mercy...

Jeannie: That'll be the last time they, or anybody, will underestimate Team Ireland.

Tom: I don't think the issue between these two teams is quite over yet anyway. Team Ireland will get what's coming to them yet...

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

*The PPV view fades into a scene within a warm setting: a restaurant of one the highest quality. Everywhere happy customers, some families and others alone, are enjoying the fine cuisine and atmosphere. Romantic music floods and drowns out the muddled conversations. In the center of it all lies a huge table with decorations abound, all celebrating a couple's 25th wedding anniversary. The party goers seem full of merit, each enjoying the bond that has brought them together to this location. The view moves past the group to a back hallway where a woman walks back first out of a door. She blows a kiss into the doorway, which is broom closet... inside of which is a man and a woman in their underwear. They squirm, trying to break free from their bonds but to no avail. Their sound of struggles, as they remain tied up to each other & gagged with rag, linger out into the hallway. The woman shudders hard and falls against the wall for a second, causing a familiar white braid to fall out of her stolen hat.*

“Now now... much more of that and I won't be able to leave.... awwwww....”

*She slams the door as both of their eyes go wide, then turns to the camera revealing... the woman that calls herself Mara Morrigan. She rubs her hidden body as the clothes of a female waiter painfully restrict her appearance. Her hands reach up and tuck her braid back out of sight. With a coy finger, she urges the camera to follow her.*

Mara: Lust. It is the force that binds couples together in utter bliss until it wains. Pure... animalistic... desire. Doomed, or perhaps blissed, to be forever a flash in the pan. But... eros.... love.... *She shudders.* Love is a perversion of lust. An artificial Frankenstein created by the laws of men that simply is sick.

*She glares slightly at the camera for being at her head and not lower as she was being followed. Nevertheless, she beckons the camera further and directs it towards the table with the happy couple. She spits on the ground.*

Mara: That's not something to be celebrated. That's something to be put down like a sick, old dog. That's not happiness... that's not passion... and that's certainly not lust. Why a human succubus would starve to death from the lack of feelings and emotions.

*She stares into the camera mere inches from the lens, and wipes a false tear. All the while her supposed sad features do nothing to hide the upper curls at the end of her lips. Slowly she backs away after almost touching the camera with her lips in a faux kiss.*

Mara: But fate is a powerful and pleasing mistress... *She grins in a old kilter way.* Along with the many beautiful divorces freeing diluted fools back into the lust pit... *She shudders to herself, apparently 'feeding' again. Her eyes return back to camera few seconds later.* A kindred soul, lonely and hungry for affection, was found in the traveling festival of Dead Moon.

*With that she steps out into the crowd and begins to take over the job of the girl in the closet. After one or two orders from a table close to the couple, she abandons her 'duties' and runs over to the older man. Without any words she hops onto his lap in front of his wife and plants one right on his cheek. The party immediately becomes very confused and silent as does the living chair that Mara is using. The woman erupts in anger.*

Woman: Young lady, what do you think you're doing?!

Mara: *She looks at the woman very confused. Mara begins to speak in a voice far from her own earthy tones into something more... modern.* ...Lover... Who's that? *She tilts her head at the woman but then grins at the recognition.* OH! I remember her from that picture that fell out of your wallet! You remember? That night was awesome. So much bruising and I couldn't even stand right for weeks-

Woman: TERRY!

Man: *Stunned.* ...But... Linda! I swear I've never met this chick before in my life!

Mara: ...Didn't you say she was your mom? *With a wave.* Hey Terry's mom!

*From the back of the restaurant, a pair of wide doors come swinging open and a wedding cake of immense size is soon wheeled out. It's path is being directed by a small figure dressed entirely in white, with a similar colored cap tilted low so their face is obscured. The giant pastry would be perfectly fine except for the fact that it has "HAPPY DIVORCE, SUCKERS!" written across it in light blue lettering. The mysterious attendant strikes a little Vanna White pose beside it, displaying the cake for all to see*

Mara: Aww... A divorce? Was it over little ole me? How cute!

Linda: Terry... You have cheated on me for the last time! At least before you had the decency to keep things private and not bring it out into the public-

Terry: But Linda, I swear this tim-

Linda: NO MORE WORDS! I'm leaving you, for good! And I will make you pay for this embarrassment! Pay!

*The woman stomps away in anger as Terry looks stunned. The people there to celebrate with him have already started getting their coats and belongings to leave. Mara beams to no one and pushes herself off of Terry's lap. He glares at her for ruining him but then comes to his senses and chases after his life long love. Mara turns to the camera.*

Mara: And thus... Two more souls were saved...

?: Have'a happy you two!

*The stranger who brought the cake wiggles a few fingers as the once happy couple exit. The figure removes it's cap and tosses it aside, long blonde hair spilling out from underneath of it. It's revealed to be a female and she shakes her hair about, before sweeping it backwards. Her face is covered in white clown make-up, with a red circle painted on the tip of her nose and two pink circles drawn on her cheeks*

Madison: More cake for us!

*The clown girl reaches over to the discarded cake, snags a piece off and begins munching away at it. Mara smiles approvingly at her new partner in crime and places a hand softly on her shoulder.*

Mara: W*I*G, you're Goddess of Pure Lust has arrived... *Her eyes shift to Madison scarfing down more cake.* ...And I've brought a helpful friend.

*She gives a wicked wink to the camera. The two women fade into purple haze of video effects. Upon it, red letters form.*

Mara Morrigan... coming soon.

[Reynaldo Fernandéz]

The Fink: "The following contest is scheduled for ONE fall and it is for The W*I*G* World Heavyweight Championship!"

The crowd cheers in anticipation of the main event.

The Fink: "Introducing first..THE CHAMPION.."

Tom: "Odd for the champion to be introduced first, wouldn't you say?"

Jeannie: "Don't you know anything about suspense?! You have to make the people wait a little longer."

Tom: "No one, especially Synthy, knows who her opponent is so how does one prepare for something like that?"

Jeannie: "Simple. You don't!"

Tom: "Which leaves the champion at a grave disadvantage."

And She's a Killer
And She's a Keeper ...

Am I blurry
In your vision?

Was I just
A poor decision?

Cut me open
With precision…

and we'll finger
The inci-si-on…

Tell me what have I done
(Quid Pro Quo)

To watch you lose
Control?!

*During these lyrics, the lights had dimmed into a silvery gray, finally dissolving into a velvety inky black. Fuchsia lights began to halfway through, and are now slowly evolving into lazers.*

I will give you sanctuary
In these hymns of Thanatos ...

I will give you sanctuary!

You want to
See me burn
I am living fire!

You want to
See me burn
I am LIVING FIRE!

You will know me
By the scars I bare!

Silvery fog spreads. Synthy Eris walks slowly out, utter determination making her vampire-esque features glow with an off light. She stops in the middle of the top ramp, and looks around her, spreading her arms slowly out to her sides, and mouthing something to the air above her. A little smirk is given as she hears the crowd's roar, pleased to be back in front of an audience once more. She sashays to the ring, adjusting her black shades as she goes, staring just at Finkel.
Reaching the apron, she embraces the top rope and flips over it. She continues to the opposite side, turns her head off to the side and throws her sunglasses nonchalantly. Her piercing's are shining extravagantly, her make-up done lightly- ultra neutral except the tone of purple beneath her eyes. Her eyes suddenly sharpen into a state not easily read.

Tom: "And Synthy Eris is back in action tonight! The first time we've seen her in some months and this will be her first defense!"

Jeannie: "Real fighting champ, alright."

Tom: "She suffered an injury and has been rehabbing ever since! But I believe she's ready to make up for that tonight! And our audience seems thrilled to see her again!"

Jeannie: "And our audience likes gasoline on toast. Big deal."

Synthy waits in the corner, looking ready to pounce with her with her hands upon her knee's. Awaiting her opponent...whomever it turns out to be. Everything remains eerily silent until lights begin to flash on the entrance ramp. "Crimson Shadow" by DJ Taka begins to play and out walks non other than the monstrous Chick Aura. The crowd gives a mixed reaction but seems anxious for this show down. Aura looks quite primed and ready to make the title her own as she heads to the ring and quickly makes her way inside. She stands with folded arms and the two combatants have an intense staredown.

The Fink: "Ladies & Gentlemen, it's time for your Wrestling's Innovative Genesis: Glory and Misery Pay-Per-View Main Event of the evening!"

Big cheers!

The Fink: "First, standing in the corner to my left, standing 5 feet, 7 inches tall, she weighed in this morning at 145lbs, hailing from Indianapolis, Indiana... This is the champion. She is... SYN~THYYYY... EEEEERRRR~IIIIIIIS!"

Synthy receives a large, positive reaction but her eyes never leave her foe for the night.

The Fink: "And her opponent..standing 6 feet, 2 inches tall, she weighs in at 219lbs..hailing from Japan..this is your challenger... CHIIIIIIIICK AURRRRAAAAAAAA!"

Another mixed reaction for Ms.Aura, and much like her opponent, she only stares with quiet determination.

Tom: "This will certainly be no easy task for Synthy as her opponent out sizes her by quite a large margin. But she was able to overcome a similar situation winning this title so we can never count her out."

Jeannie: "I think one Chick is gonna smash the other chick into pieces!"

Tom: "I see what you did there."

DING-DING-DING!

The two "chick's" begin to circle one another while the crowd stomps and claps along in anticipation. Chick goes for a lock-up but Eris slips behind her and snags in a waist lock. Chick throws a few elbows backwards but The Chaos Queen ducks the attempts. Synthy backs up just enough to stomp away at Chick's calves to drop her down to one knee, not wasting a moment to get downright brutal. Synthy uses her flexible, long legs to plant a couple of swift kicks around Chick's shoulder, mid-section and knee area. She bounces off the ropes and performs a Shining Wizard but Chick is able to duck and Synthy lands upon her feet, both women facing each other. Synthy speeds towards her Japanese foe but Chick ducks low and now has Eris upon her shoulders for a Samoan Drop. Before Aura can attempt the move, Synthy wiggles free and lands upon her feet, beside Chick. Quickly, she capitilizes with an Enziguiri that causes a loud SMACK and stuns the receiver. Synthy continues the kick based offense with a Spinning Heel Kick but Chick is able to catch her into her arms and toss her skywards into a Powerbomb position. Synthy uses the momentum to sail over her head and roll her up into a pinning predicament. But Chick rolls backwards as well and lands a harsh kick to Synthy's face while she's in a sitting position.

Tom: "A fast and furious exchange that ends in Chick's favor, at least for the time being."

Jeannie: "Little Miss Hair Dye might want to check and see if she's still got all of her teeth!"

Chick drags Synthy up by that dyed hair and whips her hard into a corner. She has no time to recover as Chick makes a sprint and lands an MVP style Yakuza-Kick that drops Synthy face first onto the mat. Chick reaches down and grips the back of Synthy's leather pants and hoists her back to her feet without a great deal of effort. Chick shoves Synthy into the ropes and as she returns, almost turns her inside out with a Spinning Clothesline. Chick uses her dominant strength to hoist Eris back up once more where she backs her into a corner, grinding one palm into her face with the other unloads with a series of loud, vicious chops. With Synthy reeling and resting against the corner, Chick once again looks for the Aura of Lightning Yakuza Kick. However, Synthy rolls away at the last possible second and Chick kicks nothing but turnbuckle. Synthy quickly scrambles to the top rope and dives off with a Hurricanrana! Chick is flipped upside down and she lands on her back. Chick, dazed, returns to her feet only to be knocked off them again with a Trouble In Paradise style kick that leaves her laying. Synthy wisely hooks both legs..

1..

2..

....Forceful kick out!

Jeannie: "We all know Synthy can take some punishment after her wars with Coltrane but I think Chick can give as good as she takes!"

Tom: "It will take quite the effort to pin either one of these dangerous ladies, that's for sure."

Synthy goes for an Armbar attempt but Chick shoves her away. Synthy retaliates with a Sit-Out Jawbreaker and Chick is stumbled once more. Synthy goes for another Hurricanrana attempt but Chick grabs her legs and Synthy lands flat on her back. Chick keeps a hold of the leather clad legs and Catapults Synthy to the outside where she crashes near the guardrail. Chick rolls to the outside to continue the punishment. As she approaches Synthy halts her progress with a couple of well placed kicks to the stomach. With Chick doubled over, Synthy turns to the guard rail and uses nimble balance to climb atop of it. After steadying herself, she leaps backwards, looking for an Elbow Smash attack but Chick is able to grab her around the waist tightly, Synthy's feet never touching the ground. In a frightening display, Chick hoists Synthy backwards and brings her crashing onto the unprotected floor with a German Suplex! The masses are stunned and they every right to be after seeing that!

Tom: "Good God! A German Suplex on the floor! Chick may have just crippled Synthy with that move!"

Jeannie: "Hope everyone enjoyed seeing Synthy because I think she's going to be gone for awhile after that!"

Chick, smelling gold in her future, rolls Synthy back into the ring and quite promptly hooks a leg.

1..

2..

....Amazingly, Synthy kicks out!

Tom: "Most people would have just laid down after that but not Synthy Eris!"

Jeannie: "Yeah, she's apparently too dumb."

A dizzy Synthy is brought to her feet as Chick slips behind her and goes for a similar move, an X-Plex. Synthy counters by landing on her feet but is still too out of it to mount an offense. This leaves her easy pickings for an STO. Synthy looks limp as Chick begins to circle her, giving her a few kicks to the head. More taunting than painful. Chick looks to lock in an STF but Synthy valiantly struggles and is able to sweep Chick with a Drop-Toe-Hold. Synthy, somewhat instinctively locks in a Hangsman's Clutch!

Jeannie: "There she goes, stealing moves again!"

Tom: "Chris Hero is quite a favorite of hers and I say it's a tribute!"

Synthy has the hold on for a few moments but in her wobbly state coupled with Chick's strength, her opponent makes it to the ropes. Synthy tries to shake the ol' cobwebs while Chick returns to her feet and goes for a Diving Crossbody. Chick is able to catch, however, and looks to smash her with the Kiss The Pavement (Queen Bee Bomb) but as she's lifted upside down, Synthy locks in a tight body scissors and a Cross Choke! The Chaos Crippler! Unfortunately, for her Chick is too close to the ropes and the hold is broken. When the champion gets back to her feet, Aura clobbers her with a Clothesline. After a few stomps, Chick drags Synthy across the ring and hoists her up to the top rope. She climbs up after her, looking for a Snapmare but Synthy fights back. A few punches and Chick is sent landing into the ring but quickly gets back up. Only to be knocked back down with a Swanton Bomb!

1...

2...

...Ever so close! Chick kicks out!

Jeannie: "Every time I think Synthy's done, she finds a way to get back into the swing of things. I'll give 'er that much."

Tom: "A Swanton Bomb nearly spelled the end for the mystery challenger but it wasn't enough at this juncture."

Both women are a little out of it as they get back to a vertical base and they begin to trade punches. The larger Chick Aura takes the advantage but Synthy ducks a wild swing with a drop kick to both knee's that drops Aura onto them. Synthy displays her speed by taking down Chick with a Head Scissors from the kneeled position, spiking the move so it's also a combination DDT of sorts. Synthy goes for another pin!

1...

2...

..Not enough! Synthy grabs Chick's leg and tries to turn her over but Chick kicks her away with her free foot. As Synthy rebounds from the ropes, Chick catches her in an unexpected Small Package.

1...

2...

Synthy wiggles free! Chick looks to press the offense but Synthy surprises her with an Uppercut that's very European. Synthy lands some kicks to the joints of Chick's legs and gets her down onto her knee's once more. Synthy quickly hits a Snap DDT and Chick's head bounces off of the mat. Synthy seems to be targeting the legs as she locks in her Herzeleid Strandräuber leglock. She pulls back for dear life and Chick looks to be in pain as the hold is applied. Chick won't give up and eventually makes her way to the ropes. Synthy keeps the hold in for as long as she's allowed before letting go. Kicks and stomps are directed around Chick's knee's to further weaken the ligaments.

Tom: "Sound strategy by Synthy here. Lifting Chick upwards, especially after the punishment she's taking would be quite an ordeal."

Jeannie: "Sure but this Chick's legs are like tree trunks! She's going to need a buzz saw to hack them down!"

Chick returns to her feet, amidst all the kicking and shoves Synthy down, who rolls back to her feet. Synthy goes for a Clothesline but Chick ducks and gets her into a Snapmare position. Only she turns it into a Dragon Suplex at the last second!

Tom: "Could this do it?!"

1...

2...

....No! Synthy with a shoulder up! Chick tries for her Aura of Fire (Samoan Drop) once more but her knee's trouble her too much to connect with the move and Synthy slides down. More kicks to the leg's leave a trace of pain across the challenger's face. Synthy attempts a Neckbreaker but Chick breaks free and locks in another German Suplex but Synthy holds on tight and rolls her up with a Wheel Barrel!

1...

2...

Chick breaks free again! Synthy runs at her challenger but Chick simply tosses her to the lights and Eris lands flat upon her face after receiving a great deal of velocity. Chick limps and yanks Eris upwards and sends her back down with a well placed Head Butt. She holds her knee but leaps upwards and drives a large elbow into Synthy's stomach which leaves her gasping for air. Chick grimaces from the pain in her knee but drags Synthy up once more, looking for her Kiss The Pavement. As the move is nearly completed, Synthy rolls her up in a Small Package!

1..

2..

...Chick with a kick out! Synthy goes for a Running Tornado DDT but as she reaches her full height in the air, Chick shoves her away and sends her crashing onto her stomach. Synthy springs upwards, bent over and holding her stomach, leaving her prone to the Kiss The Pavement! Which connects this time!

Jeannie: "She hit it! That's all she wrote! Kiss The Pavement, baby!"

Chick pulls back a leg and hooks it, looking for the win!

1...

2...

......Synthy unbelievably kicks out! The crowd goes bananas!

Jeannie: "How in the HELL did she do that?!"

Tom: "Amazing! Surely, I thought that was enough! But Eris continues on!"

Aura looks first stunned and then extremely pissed at development. Glaring at Synthy's limp body, she limps to her feet and drags her towards the turnbuckle's.

Tom: "Aura has bad intentions here and whatever it is can't be good for Eris."

Aura pushes whatever pain she has and slowly climbs to the top rope. Synthy still looks lifeless in the center of the ring, as Aura looks down upon her. The 200 pound woman leaps off with a Double Knee Drop Attempt! Synthy will be squashed flat! But she suddenly springs to life and rolls away! The crowd roars and Chick looks to be in agony from landing upon her damaged knee's!

Tom: "Chick went for it all but I think this is going to severely cost her!"

Jeannie: "Damn it! I thougth for sure Synthy was dead!"

This time, Chick doesn't have the will to shove Synthy away and she spikes her with a second Running Tornado DDT. Synthy hurriedly applies a Grounded stretch muffler with headscissors applied.

Tom: "Chaos Factor! The Chaos Factor! Can Chick endure this with her injured knees?!"

Synthy pulls back tightly and locks the hold in securely while Chick writhe's about. Chick won't tap out about Synthy cranks tighter and tighter until Chick has no choice but to do so!

Tom: "It's over! It's over! She tapped! Synthy Eris has retained the gold!"

Synthy finally lets go of hold and flops onto her back in exhaustion while Chick grips one of her inflicted knees.

The Fink: "Here is your winner...and STILL The W*I*G* WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIOOOON...SYNTHYYYYYY ERRRRIIIIIIIIISSSS!"

The referee leans outside the ring, receiving the W*I*G World Heavyweight before he hands it off to a now-seated Synthy Eris. After he helps her up to her feet, she raises her belt high above her head, the crowd cheering quite loudly during all of this as she exits the ring and makes her way up the aisle, the belt still over her head as Chick Aura lay prone in the ring.

Jeannie: I'm still not impressed. Not one bit!

Tom: Regardless of what YOU might say, this was no easy victory, but now with her first title defense, no one can say that her reign isn't in full-swing.

Now at the top of the stage, Synthy once again raises her championship belt high over her head--higher than before--as the crowd once again cheers for her.

Tom: Ladies and gentlemen, there's certainly been some ups tonight, and there's definitely been some downs too, but it's been an incredible evening, and with this, it's even moreso. For Jeannie Lawless, I'm Tom Bailey. Thanks all for watching, and have a great night, everyone!

Copyright Wrestling’s Innovative Genesis, 2009. All rights reserved.